Categories > Original > Poetry

If I Knew How To Cry, I Would Be

by ChasingPavementsxoxo 6 reviews

Uh, this is really personal, but read? Or not. Whichever.

Category: Poetry - Rating: PG-13 - Genres: Angst - Published: 2012-04-01 - Updated: 2019-11-16 - 357 words

If I Knew How To Cry, I Would Be

For years you pushed me down
Fat, Ugly, and Stupid where common household names
and supposedly true descriptions
While the hand was raised few times
And while the bruises didn’t last
I know they’re still there

And if I would cry,
I would be known as weak
So I didn’t
Because weak means worthless
another accurate description

So when funerals passed
I never cried
Never cried
Because all those years
I never learned how

Crying is a weakness
And I would be the weakest of them all
If I knew how

Because all those years
Through everything you did
I never cried
I would run, I would hide, I would panic
But I never cried

I wasn’t allowed
So I never learned how

So now, when people wonder why I’m so distant
Or if they think I’m cruel
Or emotionless
It’s not true

Because Daddy, you can push the blame all you want
But the truth is
I never learned How To Cry

And that’s your fault.


A/N uhm, so this was really personal for me. Inspired by my life, and the lives of others. I realized that I never learned how to cry a few minutes ago when I was reading this incredibly sad one shot, and wanted to cry, but for the life of me, I couldn't. And then I realized, I've only ever cried like, 3 times my whole life. Once at a suicide at my school, one really super personal time, and I think during one fic. That was it. I think. I don't count when I was like, a few months old. That shiz just doesn't count.

So. Yeah. Just kind of told you my life story that you did not need to read at all. Feel free to ignore, it's no big deal. But uh, kindly R&R because, well, I wanna know what you guys think. Legit. I honestly do.
oh, and if it was shitty as hell, I wrote it in about 2 minutes, and I did absolutely NO editing. So yeah.

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