Categories > Celebrities > My Chemical Romance > Forever in my heart

She's really gone

by WickedDiamond 4 reviews

Mikey completely loses it when reality fully dawns on him.

Category: My Chemical Romance - Rating: R - Genres: Angst,Drama,Romance - Characters: Frank Iero,Gerard Way,Mikey Way,Ray Toro - Warnings: [?] - Published: 2012-05-28 - Updated: 2012-05-28 - 1313 words

1Moving
A/N: Ok here's part 3 for whoever reads this story. Thank you loads and loads to Chemical_30 who actually comments. it means so so much to me I can't even explain. This is the last part I have written and that I posted on Mibba so now the updates will come a bit slower. I hope somebody likes it =) Enjoy.


The days passed quickly in Mikey's dazed mind and before anyone was ready it was time for the dreaded day. Mikey was in his.. their room putting on his suit with shaky hands. He opted for a black shirt to go with the suit... not feeling like wearing any kind of bright colour. Bunny was stroking herself against his legs as he tried to get the tie on.

His mother Donna knocks gently on the open door before walking into the room, laying her eyes on the shaking mess of a person infront of her. She bites her tongue, knowing her son needs them to stay strong today.

"Sweetie, let me do that." She says as she walks over and he looks up with tears in his eyes.

"It won't work." His voice is rough and shaky. She takes his hands, lowering them slowly as she strokes his fingers.

"It's ok. I can do it." She says calmly, swiftly working the tie into a perfect knot and flattening it out against her sons shirt.

"Perfect." She whispers, looking up to see tears falling down her baby's face.

"Oh sweetie." She says softly before pulling him into her arms, no longer able to hold back her own tears. She's rubbing his back as they stand there together in a room that would never be the same.

"I can't do this." He cries and all she can do for a while is shush him and hold him.

"Yes you can." She says shakily as they pull away and look at each other. He shakes his head repeatedly but she takes his hands comfortingly.

"You can. We're all here for you... you can." He's still crying and shaking his head but they leave the room together. Piglet following behind as they make their way to the front door. Donna makes sure that he has everything with him and that the pets stay inside, locking the door when Mikey's shaky hands won't find the right key. He sighs and hands his mother the car keys knowing that he won't be able to walk, let alone drive there.

The whole day is a dark blur to Mikey. He gets there and gets a lot of hugs. He stays close to Gerard and his mother, retrieving into his own mind and stays numb for most of the funeral. He hugs her brothers as they cry together and he talks to her parents, leaving with more hugs before sitting in the front row with his mom and dad, Gerard, Lindsey and Bandit. He sits down, taking his mothers hand and just starts crying. Silent tears flow down his face as the minister starts talking and he can't take his eyes off the closed coffin for the whole service.

His airway starts to close up a bit as family and close friends go outside to watch as the casket is lowered into the ground, his shaking has returned full force as the coffin is placed in position, the minister does the whole ashes to ashes bullshit that they always do before the coffin slowly starts to sink into the ground. Mikey falls to his knees on the grass and cries into his hands, not able to watch as his other half, the love of his life, is being lowered 6 feet into the ground.

Nobody even bats an eyelash as Mikey sobs on the ground. Who are they to tell him to pull himself together as he mourns the loss of his wife. They just let him cry and sob as they all silently watch the cermony in tears.

The coffin gets lowered slowly and everybody takes turns throwing some dirt down and say goodbye. Mikey doesn't partake in any of it, he just stays there on his knees as people starts to leave. Lindsey takes a sniffling Bandit to the car as Gerard stays behind.

"Go on, I'll be home later. I can't leave him." He tells his wife before they share a soft kiss and Lindsey drives home. More and more people start to leave and soon it's just Mikey on his knees infront of the now covered grave and his brother sitting next to him and trying to talk to him. He figured Mikey would be completely gone after this but it hurts his entire being to see his baby brother go into himself and shutting the world out.

Dusk is starting to settle over the siblings and it's getting colder by the second. Mikey doesn't seem to notice but Gerard makes him stand up. That sure got his attention.

"No!" He cries and tares his arm away from his brothers grip, once again falling to his knees.

"Mikey, please. We have to go now." He says carefully as he sits back down next to the younger brother.

"No.." Mikey whimpers before moving a bit closer to the the spot of the grave. "No." He whispers again as he lays his hand flat on the dirt covering his wife. Gerard feels his throat closing up and the tears rising to his eyes. How can he ask Mikey to leave? He knows he would be exactly the same if this was Lindsey. Just the thought sends unbearable pain through his chest. How can he tell his brother that it's gonna be ok?

"Ok.." He whispers before leaving his spot and taking Mikey's car to the now way too empty apartment. He tries not to think too much about where he is as he swiftly gathers some blankets and sweathers, painfully grabs a picture of Mikey and Alicia from the wall before going back to the cemetary. He buys some flowers on the way before joining his brother at the grave again. Mikey hasn't moved an inch and he's not even sure he noticed he was gone.

Mikey hasn't stopped looking at his hand since he put it against the ground. His silver ring shining against the dark dirt. His body is aching and tingling with emotions as he fights the urge to just sink down on the ground and die along with her.

He hears russles next to him so he turns and meets his brothers eyes, the next thing he sees is the pictures in his hands and his throat closes up. Why would he do that? He doesn't want to feel even worse right now.

Gerard just rubs his back comfortingly and puts the picture against the headstone gently. Mikey takes a shaky breath and looks at the headstone with tears in his eyes. It's his absolute favorite picture of them and a picture that couldn't be found anywhere online which made it even better. They were sitting outside on the grass with the sun shining in her hair and both of them smiling, Mikey holding her close in his arms.

He cries harder as it dawns on him more and more by the second that he will never again hold her in his arms or wake up next to her in the morning.. or see her smiling face when he gets home. He slumps to the ground and cries as Gerard puts a blanket over him and sets the flowers agains the headboard. He sits down and lifts his brother head into his lap, stroking his hair as he looks at the headstone. His own tears flowing down his cheeks as he reads the inscription on the headstone over and over.

Alicia Marie Simmons Way
1984.11.08 - 2014.09.03
Loving devoted wife
Beloved sister and daughter
Forever in our hearts
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