Categories > Celebrities > My Chemical Romance > Forever in my heart

I miss you

by WickedDiamond 3 reviews

Mikey has a really difficult time letting go.

Category: My Chemical Romance - Rating: R - Genres: Angst,Drama,Romance - Characters: Frank Iero,Gerard Way,Mikey Way,Ray Toro - Warnings: [?] - Published: 2012-05-29 - Updated: 2012-05-29 - 1386 words

A/N: Ok here's part 4. I've been working on it all day and late into the wee hours last night. I'm quite proud of this and it means a lot to me. I hope someone will like it and please let me know what you think. One word can make my whole day. Enjoy =)

Darkness falls on the siblings as the hours pass. The grass gets cold and tiny droplets of rain starts to fall down on the two men. Mikey is laying in Gerard's lap with a few blankets and they have been silent now for quite some time. The rain, however cliché and mocking, makes Gerard sigh and stroke Mikey's hair.

"We can't stay here all night." He says quietly, a point he's been trying to make since he came back with the picture.

"How can I leave?" Mikey whispers back shakily and Gerard just nods slowly and strokes his little brother's messy, unkept hair as they stay put.

"How can I ever leave here and be ok? How will I ever keep on living?" Mikey asks quietly as he starts crying again. The pain in his chest making his breathing shake as he sobs quietly. Gerard bites back his tears as he stays quiet, knowing the questions can't be answered, not by him anyways. If Mikey is finally able to talk then he will stay silent and let him. He's been waiting for this and he is not about to break the spell.

"Everything was perfect and now she's just gone, just like that. I need her back, Gee. I can't live without her." Mikey cries harder now and they stay silent for a while. He can't take his eyes off the picture of them together as tears blur his vision and rain drops blur the picture in the frame. They were happy and he had everything. Now he has nothing.

"I love her so much." The younger man whispers into the darkness and Gerard can't hold his tears in any longer as they cry together. He can't help his brother feel better now and he feels so powerless. Mikey keeps sobbing in his lap as the rain keeps slowly soaking them.

"We were gonna have a family, everything was falling into place. Then when she got really sick she lost the baby.. It was a boy." Mikey's crying harder now so Gerard pulls him up into his arms as he hugs him tightly.

"I'm so sorry, Mikey. I'm so sorry this happened." Gerard whispers as the brothers hug tightly and cry together next to her grave. What would he do without his older brother there? He has no idea and he's relieved that he won't have to find out. He cries hard into his brothers shoulder as rain is soaking through his blankets, making him shiver from both the cold and his sobs.

Before they know it the night has settled around them and they're sitting in total darkness. Gerard makes them both stand up on the grass and squeezes his brother's shoulder.

"Mikey, we have to go home ok?" He says gently and Mikey immediately starts shaking his head, trying to break free.

"Yes.. we do. I promise you we can come back tomorrow but for now.. we have to go." He tells the younger man firmly as he looks at the sad, pained face infront of him. Mikey still ha stears streaming down his face but it's hard to tell since the rain picked up and is pouring down on them.

"It hurts too much to be home." Mikey cries as he shakes under his brothers hands. He feels a panic rising at the thought of going home and he won't let Gerard take him there.

"I know.. I know. We'll go to my place, ok? Please, Mikey." His brother is pleading with him but he just stands there for a while. It actually hurts physically to try to move away from the grave, away from her. He turns around and looks at the picture of them and the flowers Gerard left infront of it for a while. This is the only way he will see her now. In pictures and in his mind. The pain hits again, hard, as he turns around and nods slowly.

"Ok.. I'll go. But I'm coming back tomorrow." He cries and Gerard just nods and takes his hand. The pain is surreal as they walk away and get into Gerards car, all he can do is just sob quietly as they drive home to Gerard's house.

As they get there Lindsey and Bandit are fast asleep and everybody else seem to have gone home. Gerard forces him to take a shower and change clothes and then go to bed but as he lays there in the guestroom sleep won't come. He lies on his back and looks up at the ceiling, thinking about the last time he was in this guestroom with Alicia.

6 months earlier:

He hears the door gently open and close before Alicia quietly walks over to the bed, exaggerating her sneaking like a cartoon character and Mikey holds back a laugh. Alicia flashes him a smile before sliding into bed and cuddeling up to his side. Mikey just smiles and strokes her hair.

"Are you really tired?" he asks since he finds himself wide awake and buzzing with happiness after a good day spent with family.

"Mikey. no, we are not having sex in your brother's house." Alicia sighs and he laughs quietly.

"That's not what I meant. I just.. feel wide awake." He tells her amused and she giggles into his chest as he pulls her closer.

"Oh... well no, not really tired." She tells him as her fingers starts drawing patterns on his chest and stomach. He enjoys the light touches as he strokes her hair and puts the other hand behind his head.

"It's been a good day." He says quietly with a smile as he feels completely content with life.

"It really was a good day. I love being here, I love this family bond and I really love that little girl so much it hurts." She says with a happy sigh before she drapes her arm over Mikey's chest and moves up to lean her forehead against his cheek.

"Me too.. So much." They lay together silently for a while but they're both awake because Alicia's fingers keep drawing on his skin and Mikey's long fingers brush her hair back and stroke her neck gently.

"I want a family with you." He says suddenly and he bites his tongue as he waits for a respons. Alicia's fingers stop dead in her tracks before she pulls away to look at him.

"Really?" He says, sounding surprised but as their eyes lock he can see it in her eyes. That look of excitement and happiness she's had all day.

"Yes, really. Not this second obviously but.. soon." He tells her with a crooked smile and she laughs softly.

"Soon." She repeats before bending down and capturing his lips with hers in a sweet kiss. He smiles into the kiss before pulling her closer and deepening the kiss. Before they can get too carried away Alicia pulls away and once again cuddles into his side.

"I know we've never talked about this before but.. I really do want a family with you." Alicia says in almost a whisper. Mikey kisses the top of her head before laying back into the pillows and holding her close.

"I want that too with all my heart. I love you." He says with a smile playing on his lips and his eyes slowly drifting close.

"I love you too." He hears her soft voice say before sleep pulls him in and they both drift off in a happy sleep in each others arms. Everthing is perfect and he couldn't ask for anything more. He's happy.. utterly and completely happy.


Mikey turns to his side with tears falling rapidly onto the pillows. Pictures of her face, her smile flashing through his mind as he sobs into the pillow. The pain is unberable as he curls into a ball and cries himself to sleep that night. It was the same bed but everything else had changed since the last time he slept here.. everything.
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