Categories > Celebrities > My Chemical Romance > run from yourself youll never win

safe place not yet found

by cherise 1 review

frank cant run from his memories but who can he go to for comfort?

Category: My Chemical Romance - Rating: R - Genres: Drama - Characters: Frank Iero,Gerard Way,Mikey Way - Warnings: [V] - Published: 2012-06-05 - Updated: 2012-06-05 - 2914 words

day 2
notebook entery 2
notebook number 11

so it didnt start as well as it could have but i know today will be better. they have two sons. mikey and gerard. mikeys my age. hes really into music too but i dont know what type. i think he plays guitar and bass too. i thought maybe we could play together too but i dont really want to ask. my head feels like shit since last night and i havnt really eatten in a couple days but thats because they had meat and i would eat it if i had to but it makes me really sick and i dont feel like getting sick anymore. it was forced down my throat at my other house and i was sick almost all the time. right now its 3 am i thought maybe i could sneak downstairs and find something but i really dont want to get in trouble again so maybe ill wait. well see how things go in the morning.

as morning comes the way brothers were the first to be up. mainly mikey ready to practise a while before anyone else was up to complain about his playing. as he started playing louder frank slowly peaked around the corner and entered the room without mikey noticing. when he turned to his notebook he looked up at frank.
"oh hey frankie... sorry. did i wake you? i can stop. im not used to anyone being over there ever since gerard moved down stairs." mikey quickly defended himself as frank smiled.
frank giggled and cut him off, "hey hey dont worry... i actually liked it. i play too... well no more guitar but i did play."
"well... you can play mine... well if you want." mikey held his guitar to frank, "go on take it."
frank hesitated and took the guitar, "thanks. its been a while but im sure i can still play." as he grabbed a pick from mikeys sidetable frank decided to sit on the desk chair by mikeys bed.
mikey continued playing a bass line he was working on and frank started to join in. messing up on some notes frank stopped a moment and looked out the door, "your parents are up... do you go to school?"
mikey nods and looks at the time, "they must have heard us but its okay. gerard and i go to school in an hour. we're in the sixth grade. will you be going?"
frank slowly shakes his head, "no i dont go to school. ive been homeschooled ever since i was at my house. i guess im in the nineth grade now."
"thats really good though! why do you seem so down about that?" mikey askes surprised.
frank sighs and looks at the floor, "i was always called a smart ass at the last house. i guess it just bothered me alot."
"well my parents cant homeschool but theyll be happy im sure!" mikey smiles as he starts to put away the guitars, "wait... does this mean you can go to highschool? im sure you can test into it and go to school there if you want."
frank quickly shakes his head, "no no i can teach myself. i have for a year now. i can do it again,"
"hmm we can see what mom and dad things but im sure theyll want you there. just so youre not all cooped up in the house all day." as mikey finishes the two of them go down into the kitchen followong the smell of french toast and syrup.
they both take a seat as mrs way places a plate in front of each of them, "good morning boys. finally decided to grace us with your presents i see"
gee smiles and dad glares at the two of them, "well yeah dad," mikey starts to defend, "i found out frankie likes guitar too. hes really good actually." mikey looks at gerard and sticks out his tounge, "oh and mom franks been homeschooled all his life but he says hes at the level of a ninth grader like gerard isnt that great!"
mrs way smiles and comes to the table with one final plate of french toast, "yes mikey thats great! hey frank maybe we can get you into a highschool. let you have a new experience?"
frank stares at his plate and moves the food around, "well... i could teach myself..."
"thats nonsecene!" mr way cuts in, "you cant teach yourself you need a teacher! sweety go and sighn him up today when you take gerard in. frank needs an educationa and people. frank trust me once youre around people youll feel alot better about this change."
frank nods and nibbles at his toast until its time to head to the school. when everyone gathers their stuff to leave frank sits still at the table, "you arent wearing that are you" a voice askes from behind him and franks turns to see gerard, "Well? is that what your wearing on your first day?"
frank looks at himself for the first time in a long time then back at him, "Its all i have... isnt it okay?"
gerard pulls him up by the arm and pulls him to the basement stairs. frank begins to whimper and struggle to get away. when his efferts fail he closes his eyes tight.

i couldnt run this time. i didnt know he was coming for me. its still my fault i fell asleep but with no food in two days my energy was gone. he pulled me up by the wrists in tight grips and pulled me to face him. his red firey eyes stared at me. looking me up and down as i tried to look away in fear.
"youre a pretty boy you know that?" his voice sounds icey cold in my ear, "i want you for my own. your mother doesnt need us. we can have eachother."
a five year old quivering in his fathers arms thats what it was abd the man refused to care. he picked up the boy and carried him down the basement stairs with heavy footsteps hitting every stair. as the boy whimpered and cried he was thrown onto a mattress hitting his head against the cement wall.

"is he okay?" mikey askes in shock looking at a shivering frank at the foot of the stairs, "Gerard what did you do?!?" he yelled.
mrs way immediatly pushes mikey a side and runs down the stairs, "frank? frankie come back to us."
gerard slowly backs away, "im sorry... i didnt do anything i thought a was helping him. i had some clothes for him... is he okay?!?"
"gerard get your ass up here befor you cause anymore problems!!" mr way yells as gerard runs past frank up the stairs.
the sound of gerards footsteps causing frank to snap out of his daze, "sweety look at me." mrs way orders frank.
frank stares at her with tears welling up in his eyes, " sorry... i didnt do anything wrong..."
mrs way holds him close and shakes her head, "no you didnt. not at all frankie and gerard didnt mean to force you down here either okay sweety?"
"no... he didnt... he has clothes right?" frank glances up at the three in the doorway, "gee... where are they? i want them now... im sorry."
gerard looks between mikey, his father, and his mother and runs back down the stairs and into his room. after mrs way led frank back up the stairs and gerard rummaged through his room he cam back with a couple pairs of jeans and a few teeshirts.
"i know theyre not my size anymore... but some clothes i just couldnt give up. you can have them though. you are my little brother now... just like mikey." frank smiles and takes the clothes to his room to change.
mrs way looks at the clock and sighs, "boys youre late. go get in the car. your father can take you on his way to work and ill have frankie along as soon as hes ready."
"mom... thank you. im sorry. i didnt mean to. i didnt know." gerard stutters as he puts on his shoes.
mikey smiles, "its okay gerard. you were doing what you thought was right and hes okay now. lets go so we're not anymore late than what we are."
gerard and mikey take their bags and head to school with theor father while mrs way goes to frankies door, "sweety are you ready? im going to take you so i can do the paper work."
frank smiles weakly and nods, "yeah... as ready as i can be. umm mrs way... do i look okay?" frank quickly turns in a circle, "its a bit different to me or somthing."
mrs way smiles down at him, "no frankie i think its perfect. the look suits you."
as the two of them go out to the car and head to the school in silence mrs way speaks up, "frankie, would you like to tell me where your mind was this morning?"
frank begins to twist and untwist his notebook in his hands, "umm... it was nothing... well not anymore... im sorry."
"you know you can tell me anything frankie. do you know that? if you ever have anything on your mind or you just want to talk im here for you." mrs way tries to get frank to open up.
frank squirms slightly in his seat and takes off his seatbelt, "its uncomfortable... look." frank starts looking at her, "it was our secret. his and mine no ones ment to know... do you understand that?" frank begins to tighten his grip on the notebook, "just a bunch of secrets... i saved her thats what matters."
mrs way pulls into a parking spot and sits still with frank, "youre right frankie... you did save her... your sister right? and those secrets youve kept all these years can be freed just like you and her are."
"can we go in now?" frank asks trying to ignore mrs ways last bit of advice.
"yes of course." she answers getting out of the car with him.
as they go inside and into the office frank becomes more and more nervous with each step. as mrs way leaves him in a chair to go speak to the highschool principal he sees a group of boys file in and gerard far behind them limping. when gerard sees frank he sighs and sits on the floor in the hallway.
frank hesitates and goes out to him, "gerard? what happened to you?" still holding his notebook he sits next to gerard.
"it was nothing. no biggy. i can handle it." gerard answers looking at the floor between his shows, "why do you ask? i upset you remember? you shouldnt care."
"well i do and you didnt... i have issues thats all." frank looks away to see mrs way standing over him with another teacher.
"so frankie this is mr smith. hes going to give you the placement test to see what classes you will be put in while attending. come with us." mrs way says.
frank looks between mr smith and gerard now becoming worried about this guy, "can... can gee... i mean can gerard come too?"
"no frankie." mrs way answers, "this test is only for you. no one else. now stand up and go ahead." frank does as hes told and follows the man into a classroom glancing back at gerard and mrs way.
mrs way sighs and glares at gerard, "what did you do this time gerard? its only been a week since youve been in a fight."
"it wasnt my fault! i didnt do anything! they got me at my locker thats all! none of them are even hurt!" gerard stiffens and holds his knees.
"i dont want to hear it gerard." mrs way says firmly and grabs his wrists, "you better hope your fathers in a good mood when he gets home from work because i wont stop him this time."

notebook entry 2
so... highschool?? whosever bright idea this was should go to hell. im only 11 and they want to put me in this school where everyones clearly alot older than me. i was fine with homeschooling myself but this family insists i need to be social... WHAT?? WHY??? i dont want to be! i wont be here long enough to know anyone as it is! im never in one place for too long!
on the other hand... gerard goes to this school. hes in the 9th grade and hes nicer than he thinks.... i think i can open up to this guy without worrying... i dont know yet.
now im just waiting for this mr smith to finish grading my paper... bye for now.

when mr smith is finally done grading the paper and takes it to frank he takes the paper and runs out of the classroom ignoring the grade on the test, "im done! mrs way im done! can we go now?!?"
"calm down frankie. let me see the results." mrs way says taking the paper, "oh my goodness! what are they going to do with you? these scores are amazing for a kid your age."
as mrs way goes over the paper mr smith steps out of the classroom smiling at frank, "mrs way you should be very proud of your boy. hes passed everything with flying colors except for math but thats it. he will be in all eleventh and twelth grade classes if thats okay with you."
"of course thats okay!" mrs way answers excitedly hugging frank, "he starts tomorrow correct?"
mr smith nods, "you two are free to go for today."
frank sighs and quickly runs out the front doors to the car with mrs way close behind, "frankie, we can celebrate tonight... maybe go out for dinner or something. how does that sound?"
frank looks out the window waiting to get home and go to mikeys room for his guitar again, "i guess that would be nice... but does mr way hace to know about gerards little... umm fight thing today? that might ruin my night."
mrs way pulls in the drive, turns off the engine, and looks at frank, "i guess... but only this once. gerards a bad kid most of the time. he shouldnt even go with us tonight but i know how mush you trust him... you are getting along with both of them arent you?"
frank nods and runs into the house and up the stairs to mikeys room. for the rest of the afternoon frank spent his time writting songs and throwing them away until his mind was blank. once that came to be he put away the guitar and went to his own room to nap until dinner.

the ropes around my wrists tighten as im spun in circles. theyre tied to a hook in the ceiling but i can barley touch the floor. as my arms start to ache tears run down my eyes but when i have no more to cry he comes back in and unhooks me causing me to fall to the wrist throb from rope burn as my father drags me across the dark room.
"our little secret my pretty. am i right?"
i nod and begin to breath hard trying not to cry, "daddy... im tired..."
"good ill make you sleep." he says as he pulls down my shorts and i begin to squirm until he holds a knife to my throat, "not one more move boy."

"frakie? frankie wake up... youre having a nightmare." gerard pushes against franks in hopes to wake him up with no effort.
frank continues to toss and turn crying in his sleep, "here ive got it!" mikey says dumping a glass of water on frankie causing him to jump up.
"dont touch me!!" frank yells at the top of his lungs.
quickly gerard and mikey backs away gerard being the first to speak, "frankie you were having a bad dream... we wanted to make it stop."
frank backs into a corner and sits holding his knees until mrs way comes to the door, "sweety, are you okay? boys leave for a moment."
mikey and gerard quickly still shocked at franks reaction, "what do you think was in the dream?"
"i have no idea." mikey answers sitting on his bed, "what if dads down stairs flipping out?"
gerard laughs, "why would he? because we woke him up the same way dad wakes us? its time for us to go to dinner anyway he needed to wake up."
as the boys talked among themselves frank slowly stood and changed his shirt, "frankie, would you like to talk abou it?" mrs way askes with high hopes hed say yes.
frank shakes his head and puts on the shirt, "no thank you... im fine.... could we go now?"
"yes. i guess so. theyre probably all waiting now anyways." mrs way sighs and goes downstairs with frank following close behind.
the rest of the night was quiet for everyone. with the days events and franks worries there was nothing that wanted to be said. after dinner they all went home and without a word to one another they all went to their own rooms for the night.

sorry its taken so long but please tell me what you think. this ones just a winging it story.
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