Categories > Celebrities > My Chemical Romance > Empty With You
Spark Of Light
3 reviewsPlans go awry and Ray is actually in this one for more than ten seconds!
3Exciting
Looking at guys, this story is really unrealistic isn't it? I mean, guys don't piss around trying to be subtle, they just put their foot in everything.
Seriously a (dude) friend of mine asked (at his girlfrind's request) one of my best friends who may/may not fancy me whether he did or not. Which doesn't sound too bad. But the way he worded this was "Hey, Sophie (me) wants to know whether or not you fancy her?"
I didn't even know he was going to ask. Then he had to announce this whilst me, his girlfriend, and the guy who may/may not fancy me were all together! It was the most awkward thing on the planet!
And the most annoying thing... I don't even know what the answer is!
Grrrr.
So, based on that the real way this story would go is;
Frank: Hey, Ray I fancy Gerard. Ask him if he'd have sex with me.
Ray: Gerard, Frank wants to know whether you'd date him or not.
Gerard: Of course I would!
And then they jump in to bed together and make lots of babies.
Don't worry, that's not going to happen though - at least not yet ;). Actually this story is looking to be like something theescapist99 would write. The storyline at least. Ok, I'mma shut up now before I give the whole thing away.
And just for the record theescapist99 is awesome.
I now present to you... CHAPTER FOUR!
Sx
Unsurprisingly, Gerard avoided Frank for the rest of the day. Of course, they saw each other often enough (after all, they were still trapped on the bus together), but the singer was always with his brother, or working with Ray in the studio, or - once or twice - even up front talking to the drivers. Whenever he saw the guitarist, he'd hastily involve himself in conversation with whoever he was with at that point, as though he knew Iero wasn't going to say anything in front of that other person.
He was right about that, for the moment at least. Frank wasn't stupid, and he knew that Way was perfectly at liberty to sleep with whomever he wanted. But the man's behavior now was doing nothing but sparking his curiosity. If Gerard had just talked to him - perhaps written off the man last night as a mistake, or even a boyfriend coming out to visit him on tour - then the guitarist wouldn't have had half the determination to try and find out what was going on. But his friend's evasive behavior just caused him to think there was something... deeper going on, more secretive, sinister. What that something was, Frank couldn't begin to fathom, but he was going to find out. There were no 'ifs' or 'buts' about it.
At the moment, he was sitting in the studio with Ray, just messing around on the guitars in there, and recording anything they thought was vaguely decent. Iero's mind wasn't really on it though, but if his friend noticed, he didn't comment.
Obviously enough, it was Gerard who was currently occupying the younger man's mind. He just couldn't figure out what the hell happened last night, and why it was so bad that the singer was so determined to avoid him. Perhaps it was just out of embarrassment of the whole situation, but Frank couldn't help but feel it was something more than that. And anyway, the elder Way had never really been one to pick up people to bring to his hotel room. Of course, the last time that would have really been relevant was five years ago - before he had gotten with Lindsey. If there was one thing that Iero was sure of, it was that Gerard never would have cheated on his wife. But then, sleeping with guys in hotels... well, the guitarist would have never put money on Way doing that either. What if that was the whole route of the divorce? That the singer really had slept with someone other than Lindsey, as they had been hypothesizing days ago?
Frank shook his head, trying to rid the idea from his mind. But after last night, nearly everything he had thought about his friend, had been thrown off. It was as if he was now seeing Gerard in a whole new light, and he really did not like what he saw.
"You're miles away," Ray commented idly, breaking the other guitarist's train of thought.
"Yeah, sorry, just thinking," Iero flushed slightly as he spoke, embarrassed at having been called out on it.
"I could tell." Toro chuckled, plucking at the strings under his fingers in a way that Frank was sure couldn't be good for them. "Dare I ask what about?"
The shorter man sighed, debating with himself about whether he should tell Ray or not. After all, it was as much his business as anyone else's, but at the same time, Iero felt that to tell that older man would be betraying Gerard. Which was somewhat ridiculous - after all, if the singer did have a problem, the whole band had to know. They were built on trust and a mutual love of music, which is why secrets were such rare things among them.
But still. Frank shook his head, deciding that he'd talk to the singer before anyone else. "Just life, y'know."
"Yeah, that does require some thought." Ray chuckled again. "Look, if I'm wrong, I'm gonna look like an idiot, but are you thinking about Gerard by any chance?"
Iero looked up, startled. Then he blushed. "Dammit Toro, looks like your telepathic powers are back up."
"Nah, you're just predictable."
"Thanks!"
"Pleasure, man," The older man looked down at the guitar in his lap, and began to adjust the tuning. "We're all worried about him, you know."
"Glad I'm not the only one who noticed something's up." Frank grumbled.
"Dude, don't say that." Toro frowned. "We all care about him. You know that."
"What do you think it is though? Why haven't you or Mikey done anything?"
"Man, I have no idea. I'm guessing it had something to do with his divorce, but it doesn't take a genius to figure that out. As for why me or Mikes haven't done anything... well, as I said, neither of us know what's going on. Have you said anything?"
Frank shrugged. "I asked about it... He wasn't very happy to talk to though. And..." Here, he glanced at the door, as though expecting Gerard to have sensed they were talking about him, and was about to come bursting in, making accusations. "Well, last night, there were two people in the room next door to mine, having sex."
Ray made a face. "Great. Two questions: What does this have to do with Gerard? And how the fuck do you know that?"
Iero just looked pointedly at him. "I heard them. And can you honestly not see where this is going?"
The other man cocked his head to the side, frowning. Then realization dawned on his face. "Gerard... he... he picked up a groupie or something?"
"I don't know, man." Frank sighed and put his guitar down, leaning back in his chair. "I just heard them, and yelled at them to quiet down - I didn't realize it was Gee at this point - and some guy yelled back. Then this morning I walked out and three guesses who came out of the room I'd heard all the noise coming from?!"
"Gerard." Ray said, unnecessarily. After all, they both knew what the answer was. "I don't suppose he could have just gone in there to yell at them for making noise? Maybe they kept him awake or something?"
"Maybe." Iero allowed. "But then why would he have been avoiding me all day?"
"True." Toro frowned. Then he mimicked Frank by putting his guitar down and leaning back. The other man noticed his fingers continued to pluck the air though, as though the strings were still beneath them. Then he sat up again, as something occurred to him. "Hang on, did you say, a guy yelled back at you?"
"Yep," The shorter man said grimly. It took everything in him not too let his true feelings show - not let Toro on to the fact that this was actually tearing him up inside. That particular secret wasn't ready to come out yet.
"Man, this just gets weirder and weirder. I mean, I knew he dated a few guys before, but he was always so pissed, I kinda assumed it was just the alcohol. I mean, who doesn't become bi' when they're drunk?"
Frank laughed, causing Toro to smile sheepishly.
"No offense man - I mean, yeah, you dated him, oh God - forget I said anything."
"It's fine dude, whatever. That was over before it started." Iero waved it off, again, not wanting to reveal that he still kind of wanted in Gerard's pants. More than that even. "If that's true though, do you think he's drinking again?"
"I fucking hope not." Ray replied, hurriedly. "Surely not - he's not that much of an idiot."
"No, but he is completely compulsive. And emotionally overrun. Could you blame him if he had started again?"
"I suppose not." He shrugged. "I sure as hell hope he hasn't." Then he sighed. "What are we gonna do about this?"
"No idea." Frank shrugged, trying to appear calm, but was unable to cease the worry sweeping through him. "Look, don't say anything for the moment, okay? Not even to Mikey - we don't want him to worry, and Gerard's his brother, fuck only knows how he'd react. Plus, I don't think Gee'll appreciate that I told you. Let me handle it for the moment, and it that doesn't work, we'll come up with a plan 'B'."
"Okay then." Ray nodded in agreement, happy that he wasn't going to have to be the one to deal with the singer, or his brother for that matter. He had no ideal how he'd handle Mikey's worry, or the guilt trip that would probably be thrown at him by the over-dramatic Gerard. "What are you gonna do, though?"
"For the moment?" Frank replied grimly, clearly steeling himself for battle. "Just talk to him. I mean, this could be relatively innocent. Somehow I doubt it, but you never know. See what happens, then work from there."
"Sounds as good as anything I could come up with." Toro smiled.
The other man snorted in reply. "Thanks man. I'll tell you now though - it's gonna be a fucking disaster."
"Probably," Ray assented.
"Thank you so much for the support."
As it turned out though, it wasn't so much the conversation with Gerard that was difficult - it was finding an opportunity to talk to him that was. When the two guitarists emerged from the studio two hours before they were due to arrive at the venue, their singer was nowhere to be seen.
"Hey Mikes," Ray said as he and Frank sat down in the lounge. The bassist had mercifully given up with his laptop, and had instead switched to playing some Mario game on the PlayStation they had on board. When the other two walked in he paused the game and grinned up at them from his seat on the floor.
"Hey guys. Where you been all day?"
"Studio," Frank replied, flopping down on the sofa behind him.
"Cool, did you get much done?"
"Not really." Ray shrugged. "Just messing around really. We found some stuff that sounded pretty sweet but whether it'll fit into the album or not, who knows?"
"Who knows indeed?" Mikey laughed, and then resumed his game.
"Have you been playing this all day?" Frank asked.
"Pretty much. Gerard went to sleep about an hour and a bit ago, and I've given up on trying to get online, so Mario it was. I'm doing awfully though."
"Want some help?" Ray asked.
"Sure, just plug yourself in."
"Why did Gerard go back to sleep?" The other guitarist asked. Toro shot a glance at him, but Frank ignored this, keeping his gazed fixed on the younger Way. He was clearly trying to see whether or not Mikey knew anything about the singer's nightly activities.
However - as many fans, crew, and the band themselves had noted - Mikey Way's poker face was pretty much perfected, and ever present. So his answer of "Dunno, he was just tired I guess," gave away nothing.
Iero sighed at this, and settled back into his seat to watch his friend battle various cartoons in the perfectly simple, fantasy world that Mario lived in.
They arrived at the venue before Gerard woke up, or at least, before he decided to emerge from his bunk. When the bus finally stopped, and the driver came back to announce that they were there, it was of course Frank who volunteered to go wake the singer.
Mikey just shrugged and got off, and was followed by Ray who left only after shooting his fellow guitarist another warning look. Iero rolled his eyes, and made his way to the sleeping area, preparing himself for the coming confrontation.
As it turned out though, there wasn't one. No sooner had Frank opened the door to the small room in which the four of them slept, than he found himself face to face with Gerard. The singer side-stepped him before the shorter man got over his surprise and was walking away. Iero stood there for a moment longer, then regained his wits and chased his elusive friend down the bus.
"Hey, Gerard, wait!"
He didn't, of course, but Frank caught him anyway, and pulled the other man to a stop.
"Calm down, Gee," The guitarist rolled his eyes. "Why are you treating me like some sort of pariah?"
"You know why," Was the reply. "I don't want to have this conversation with you."
Iero frowned at him, weighing up his options. Clearly his friend was expecting him to ask about last night - as he was going to - but was determined not to answer any questions buzzing round Frank's mind. So the guitarist decided to let it slide for now, and find out what he wanted later.
"What do you mean?" He pretended to act offended, arching an eyebrow.
Gerard clearly didn't expect this. The look on his face was enough to show that. "I- You- Then what do you want?"
Frank rolled his eyes, as though he wasn't planning on interrogating his friend originally. "Look Gee, it's not up to me who you sleep with. I'm not gonna lecture you for it - as long as you don't hurt yourself, I don't care." He gave a small smile, successfully hiding the hurt in him that came with the though of Way having sex with another men.
"Oh..." For some reason, Gerard looked a little unsatisfied with that answer, but the expression cleared after a few seconds. "Well, thanks then, I guess." He shrugged.
"Don't mention it." The guitarist replied. "Now, come on - let's get our asses back stage and get ready. It's gonna be a big one tonight."
"When was the last time it was small?" Way asked, then giggled at what he had said.
Frank rolled his eyes, but let out a little snort of his own. "You're man, actually. We need to play some smaller shows."
"It's funny really..." The singer mused. "When we were a small, shitty little band playing in low rent clubs on New Jersey back streets, we'd have done anything to play arenas like we do now. Now we're at sold-out-Wembley level, we're missing playing small clubs."
"Always greener on the other side, right?" His friend replied darkly.
"Life's a bitch," Gerard agreed.
As they approached the huge building in front of then, Frank poked Way's side and pointed. There was already a small gaggle of fans outside the stadium, pressing against the front gates, as though hoping to get in earlier. They hadn't noticed the two band members, as of yet, but if they lingered there much longer, it would only be a matter of time.
The singer glanced at the shorter man, who shrugged. Gerard grinned, then sauntered over to the group. The resultant screams confirmed that most of them were girls. Iero rolled his eyes at this. It wasn't that he resented them or anything, most were awesome, but seriously, it really wouldn't hurt to have a few more hard-core fans who were actually dudes. All the same, he followed his friend over to the gates, where the over-excited teens were pushing pieces of paper through the gaps and all talking at once.
Way was staying just out of hand's reach, but was snagging papers to sign, before throwing them back into the small crowd. He was almost teasing, but his genuinely warm grin, and the fact that he'd come over in the first place, proved that he wasn't being malicious.
When Frank moved to stand next to him, the noise doubled, and he laughed and waved, before copying his friend by reaching for pieces of paper to scrawl his illegible signature on. This kept up for a good ten minutes, before the two seemed to have satisfied most of the group. Then they waved and turned back to the building to get ready for tonight's show.
The hours between arriving at wherever the concert was being hosted, and actually getting on stage always passed in a frantic blur to Gerard. It hadn't been as bad recently, now that they scarcely ever wore make-up any more, but changing, doing sound checks, and listening to the roar echoing from inside the building build up was something that the singer could never keep track of. It wasn't until the routine high-fives, jumping jacks, and hugs that it finally hit the man that he was about to perform to tens, hundreds, thousands, tens of thousands of people. Then he was rushed on stage so fast he didn't have time to get nervous. It was best off this way though.
Today it was even worse. His mind wasn't on the preparations at all - it was completely preoccupied with his prior conversation with Frank. When he was first spotted by his friend, coming out of that hotel room, he was terrified. What was the man going to think of him? Hooking up like this again, so soon after his divorce? Hooking up with a guy?
After he'd got past that though, some small part of him was anticipating the impending conversation that was going to occur between him and Iero. He wanted to know what his friend thought, and, if there was a fight, if things got heated enough, perhaps Gerard would get the guts to admit the feeling that had been building up in him for a while.
Obviously though, that didn't happen. And Frank's lack of... anything, was the worst reaction the singer could imagine. The man didn't even care. He just didn't want Gerard to get hurt.
Of fucking course.
It was stupid though. Of course he didn't. He was Way's friend, as far as the guitarist was concerned, the other man's sex life had nothing to do with him. It was just the same as the singer felt about Mikey, or Ray. He shouldn't think that just because his feelings were messed up, that Frank would be the same. Because they weren't. And Gerard wasn't going to piss around, waiting for that to change.
Because it wouldn't.
Feeling slightly strengthened by his new resolve, the singer marched out of the dressing room to do his sound checks.
Frank was in there - of course - but he just smiled at Gerard, and went back to fiddling with his guitar. Way was given a mic, which he obligingly sung a few songs into before being told to stop, in order not to wear his voice out.
Then there were other things that needed to be sorted out, and people were asking about lighting, double checking the set list, asking him to please not go stage diving (not that he'd done that in a long time anyway, or planned to, anytime soon) and so on. Strangely enough, he found a few minutes to himself back in the dressing room.
There was stage make-up in the drawer there, and Gerard found himself staring at the the black eye paint for a few minutes. He hadn't worn make-up on stage in what felt like forever. Certainly not for a few years. He looked up to where a mirror was placed over the dressing table. The lights lit up his face, making him look pale. Boring.
The singer stared at himself for a few moments, contemplating. Then he shrugged and helped himself to the black, applying it thickly around his eyes. After a few minute's effort he got the look he wanted - one he hadn't worn since the Black Parade. He looked dead.
It wasn't quite corpse-like, but he'd probably freak enough people out with this sudden change, with out going all-out. Plus, he no longer was obsessed with death, with dying - not like he used to be. It was still an interesting concept, but the singer's days of looking like a ghost were behind him.
Gerard's thoughts were interrupted by a frantic voice telling him that the supporting band had finished, and they were up in ten minutes. He got up and let the stage-hand lead him through the maze that was backstage, and to his band mates.
They were leaning again the walls in the wings to the stage, just out of sight of the crowd. Mikey glanced over when he heard his brother enter, his eyes widening slightly as he took in Gerard's appearance.
"I thought you'd given up on the whole dead person thing," He said idly. The singer knew his brother to well to fall for that though - he could see the cogs working in his younger sibling's head, as he wondered what to make of this.
"It's just a bit of eyeliner," He said defensively. "I'm not planning of going all corpse-like again anytime soon. I just thought I looked a bit boring, you know?"
Mikey nodded, then smiled, clearly believing his brother. That was good - after all, Gerard wasn't lying on this occasion.
"He was wearing eyeliner the other day anyway." Frank put in. Both of the Ways turned to look at him at that comment. "What? I couldn't have been the only one who noticed."
Ray and Mikey glanced at each other, shrugging.
"Well... we all know you love me Frankie," Gerard teased after an awkward moment of silence.
The guitarist laughed. "You wish, Gee, you wish."
"Tell me about it," The other man giggled back. It was odd how easy it was to pretend to be joking.
“You’re on in five,” A stage-hand warned.
"We’d better start getting ready then,” Ray said, grinning around at his friends, like this wasn’t something they did every other day.
They started up on their ritual of jumping-jack, leading on to group hugs. They were such pansies.
As Gerard took part of their pre-show routines, he began thinking again. Apparently Frank wasn’t as oblivious as he’d like to pretend. Perhaps... perhaps his earlier indifference was faked, and he did care. Perhaps those feelings weren’t as one sided as Way thought.
It was dizzying, changing his mind this often.
Well, he had a way to test his theory.
Well, this should be fun. After all they're guys and really unsubtle, so Gerard'll just go to Frank and say "I want your babies."
Sorry, still raging about that.
Review and rate? Pleasepleaseplease.
Part of the chocolate cake I made for those who do!
Sx
Seriously a (dude) friend of mine asked (at his girlfrind's request) one of my best friends who may/may not fancy me whether he did or not. Which doesn't sound too bad. But the way he worded this was "Hey, Sophie (me) wants to know whether or not you fancy her?"
I didn't even know he was going to ask. Then he had to announce this whilst me, his girlfriend, and the guy who may/may not fancy me were all together! It was the most awkward thing on the planet!
And the most annoying thing... I don't even know what the answer is!
Grrrr.
So, based on that the real way this story would go is;
Frank: Hey, Ray I fancy Gerard. Ask him if he'd have sex with me.
Ray: Gerard, Frank wants to know whether you'd date him or not.
Gerard: Of course I would!
And then they jump in to bed together and make lots of babies.
Don't worry, that's not going to happen though - at least not yet ;). Actually this story is looking to be like something theescapist99 would write. The storyline at least. Ok, I'mma shut up now before I give the whole thing away.
And just for the record theescapist99 is awesome.
I now present to you... CHAPTER FOUR!
Sx
Unsurprisingly, Gerard avoided Frank for the rest of the day. Of course, they saw each other often enough (after all, they were still trapped on the bus together), but the singer was always with his brother, or working with Ray in the studio, or - once or twice - even up front talking to the drivers. Whenever he saw the guitarist, he'd hastily involve himself in conversation with whoever he was with at that point, as though he knew Iero wasn't going to say anything in front of that other person.
He was right about that, for the moment at least. Frank wasn't stupid, and he knew that Way was perfectly at liberty to sleep with whomever he wanted. But the man's behavior now was doing nothing but sparking his curiosity. If Gerard had just talked to him - perhaps written off the man last night as a mistake, or even a boyfriend coming out to visit him on tour - then the guitarist wouldn't have had half the determination to try and find out what was going on. But his friend's evasive behavior just caused him to think there was something... deeper going on, more secretive, sinister. What that something was, Frank couldn't begin to fathom, but he was going to find out. There were no 'ifs' or 'buts' about it.
At the moment, he was sitting in the studio with Ray, just messing around on the guitars in there, and recording anything they thought was vaguely decent. Iero's mind wasn't really on it though, but if his friend noticed, he didn't comment.
Obviously enough, it was Gerard who was currently occupying the younger man's mind. He just couldn't figure out what the hell happened last night, and why it was so bad that the singer was so determined to avoid him. Perhaps it was just out of embarrassment of the whole situation, but Frank couldn't help but feel it was something more than that. And anyway, the elder Way had never really been one to pick up people to bring to his hotel room. Of course, the last time that would have really been relevant was five years ago - before he had gotten with Lindsey. If there was one thing that Iero was sure of, it was that Gerard never would have cheated on his wife. But then, sleeping with guys in hotels... well, the guitarist would have never put money on Way doing that either. What if that was the whole route of the divorce? That the singer really had slept with someone other than Lindsey, as they had been hypothesizing days ago?
Frank shook his head, trying to rid the idea from his mind. But after last night, nearly everything he had thought about his friend, had been thrown off. It was as if he was now seeing Gerard in a whole new light, and he really did not like what he saw.
"You're miles away," Ray commented idly, breaking the other guitarist's train of thought.
"Yeah, sorry, just thinking," Iero flushed slightly as he spoke, embarrassed at having been called out on it.
"I could tell." Toro chuckled, plucking at the strings under his fingers in a way that Frank was sure couldn't be good for them. "Dare I ask what about?"
The shorter man sighed, debating with himself about whether he should tell Ray or not. After all, it was as much his business as anyone else's, but at the same time, Iero felt that to tell that older man would be betraying Gerard. Which was somewhat ridiculous - after all, if the singer did have a problem, the whole band had to know. They were built on trust and a mutual love of music, which is why secrets were such rare things among them.
But still. Frank shook his head, deciding that he'd talk to the singer before anyone else. "Just life, y'know."
"Yeah, that does require some thought." Ray chuckled again. "Look, if I'm wrong, I'm gonna look like an idiot, but are you thinking about Gerard by any chance?"
Iero looked up, startled. Then he blushed. "Dammit Toro, looks like your telepathic powers are back up."
"Nah, you're just predictable."
"Thanks!"
"Pleasure, man," The older man looked down at the guitar in his lap, and began to adjust the tuning. "We're all worried about him, you know."
"Glad I'm not the only one who noticed something's up." Frank grumbled.
"Dude, don't say that." Toro frowned. "We all care about him. You know that."
"What do you think it is though? Why haven't you or Mikey done anything?"
"Man, I have no idea. I'm guessing it had something to do with his divorce, but it doesn't take a genius to figure that out. As for why me or Mikes haven't done anything... well, as I said, neither of us know what's going on. Have you said anything?"
Frank shrugged. "I asked about it... He wasn't very happy to talk to though. And..." Here, he glanced at the door, as though expecting Gerard to have sensed they were talking about him, and was about to come bursting in, making accusations. "Well, last night, there were two people in the room next door to mine, having sex."
Ray made a face. "Great. Two questions: What does this have to do with Gerard? And how the fuck do you know that?"
Iero just looked pointedly at him. "I heard them. And can you honestly not see where this is going?"
The other man cocked his head to the side, frowning. Then realization dawned on his face. "Gerard... he... he picked up a groupie or something?"
"I don't know, man." Frank sighed and put his guitar down, leaning back in his chair. "I just heard them, and yelled at them to quiet down - I didn't realize it was Gee at this point - and some guy yelled back. Then this morning I walked out and three guesses who came out of the room I'd heard all the noise coming from?!"
"Gerard." Ray said, unnecessarily. After all, they both knew what the answer was. "I don't suppose he could have just gone in there to yell at them for making noise? Maybe they kept him awake or something?"
"Maybe." Iero allowed. "But then why would he have been avoiding me all day?"
"True." Toro frowned. Then he mimicked Frank by putting his guitar down and leaning back. The other man noticed his fingers continued to pluck the air though, as though the strings were still beneath them. Then he sat up again, as something occurred to him. "Hang on, did you say, a guy yelled back at you?"
"Yep," The shorter man said grimly. It took everything in him not too let his true feelings show - not let Toro on to the fact that this was actually tearing him up inside. That particular secret wasn't ready to come out yet.
"Man, this just gets weirder and weirder. I mean, I knew he dated a few guys before, but he was always so pissed, I kinda assumed it was just the alcohol. I mean, who doesn't become bi' when they're drunk?"
Frank laughed, causing Toro to smile sheepishly.
"No offense man - I mean, yeah, you dated him, oh God - forget I said anything."
"It's fine dude, whatever. That was over before it started." Iero waved it off, again, not wanting to reveal that he still kind of wanted in Gerard's pants. More than that even. "If that's true though, do you think he's drinking again?"
"I fucking hope not." Ray replied, hurriedly. "Surely not - he's not that much of an idiot."
"No, but he is completely compulsive. And emotionally overrun. Could you blame him if he had started again?"
"I suppose not." He shrugged. "I sure as hell hope he hasn't." Then he sighed. "What are we gonna do about this?"
"No idea." Frank shrugged, trying to appear calm, but was unable to cease the worry sweeping through him. "Look, don't say anything for the moment, okay? Not even to Mikey - we don't want him to worry, and Gerard's his brother, fuck only knows how he'd react. Plus, I don't think Gee'll appreciate that I told you. Let me handle it for the moment, and it that doesn't work, we'll come up with a plan 'B'."
"Okay then." Ray nodded in agreement, happy that he wasn't going to have to be the one to deal with the singer, or his brother for that matter. He had no ideal how he'd handle Mikey's worry, or the guilt trip that would probably be thrown at him by the over-dramatic Gerard. "What are you gonna do, though?"
"For the moment?" Frank replied grimly, clearly steeling himself for battle. "Just talk to him. I mean, this could be relatively innocent. Somehow I doubt it, but you never know. See what happens, then work from there."
"Sounds as good as anything I could come up with." Toro smiled.
The other man snorted in reply. "Thanks man. I'll tell you now though - it's gonna be a fucking disaster."
"Probably," Ray assented.
"Thank you so much for the support."
As it turned out though, it wasn't so much the conversation with Gerard that was difficult - it was finding an opportunity to talk to him that was. When the two guitarists emerged from the studio two hours before they were due to arrive at the venue, their singer was nowhere to be seen.
"Hey Mikes," Ray said as he and Frank sat down in the lounge. The bassist had mercifully given up with his laptop, and had instead switched to playing some Mario game on the PlayStation they had on board. When the other two walked in he paused the game and grinned up at them from his seat on the floor.
"Hey guys. Where you been all day?"
"Studio," Frank replied, flopping down on the sofa behind him.
"Cool, did you get much done?"
"Not really." Ray shrugged. "Just messing around really. We found some stuff that sounded pretty sweet but whether it'll fit into the album or not, who knows?"
"Who knows indeed?" Mikey laughed, and then resumed his game.
"Have you been playing this all day?" Frank asked.
"Pretty much. Gerard went to sleep about an hour and a bit ago, and I've given up on trying to get online, so Mario it was. I'm doing awfully though."
"Want some help?" Ray asked.
"Sure, just plug yourself in."
"Why did Gerard go back to sleep?" The other guitarist asked. Toro shot a glance at him, but Frank ignored this, keeping his gazed fixed on the younger Way. He was clearly trying to see whether or not Mikey knew anything about the singer's nightly activities.
However - as many fans, crew, and the band themselves had noted - Mikey Way's poker face was pretty much perfected, and ever present. So his answer of "Dunno, he was just tired I guess," gave away nothing.
Iero sighed at this, and settled back into his seat to watch his friend battle various cartoons in the perfectly simple, fantasy world that Mario lived in.
They arrived at the venue before Gerard woke up, or at least, before he decided to emerge from his bunk. When the bus finally stopped, and the driver came back to announce that they were there, it was of course Frank who volunteered to go wake the singer.
Mikey just shrugged and got off, and was followed by Ray who left only after shooting his fellow guitarist another warning look. Iero rolled his eyes, and made his way to the sleeping area, preparing himself for the coming confrontation.
As it turned out though, there wasn't one. No sooner had Frank opened the door to the small room in which the four of them slept, than he found himself face to face with Gerard. The singer side-stepped him before the shorter man got over his surprise and was walking away. Iero stood there for a moment longer, then regained his wits and chased his elusive friend down the bus.
"Hey, Gerard, wait!"
He didn't, of course, but Frank caught him anyway, and pulled the other man to a stop.
"Calm down, Gee," The guitarist rolled his eyes. "Why are you treating me like some sort of pariah?"
"You know why," Was the reply. "I don't want to have this conversation with you."
Iero frowned at him, weighing up his options. Clearly his friend was expecting him to ask about last night - as he was going to - but was determined not to answer any questions buzzing round Frank's mind. So the guitarist decided to let it slide for now, and find out what he wanted later.
"What do you mean?" He pretended to act offended, arching an eyebrow.
Gerard clearly didn't expect this. The look on his face was enough to show that. "I- You- Then what do you want?"
Frank rolled his eyes, as though he wasn't planning on interrogating his friend originally. "Look Gee, it's not up to me who you sleep with. I'm not gonna lecture you for it - as long as you don't hurt yourself, I don't care." He gave a small smile, successfully hiding the hurt in him that came with the though of Way having sex with another men.
"Oh..." For some reason, Gerard looked a little unsatisfied with that answer, but the expression cleared after a few seconds. "Well, thanks then, I guess." He shrugged.
"Don't mention it." The guitarist replied. "Now, come on - let's get our asses back stage and get ready. It's gonna be a big one tonight."
"When was the last time it was small?" Way asked, then giggled at what he had said.
Frank rolled his eyes, but let out a little snort of his own. "You're man, actually. We need to play some smaller shows."
"It's funny really..." The singer mused. "When we were a small, shitty little band playing in low rent clubs on New Jersey back streets, we'd have done anything to play arenas like we do now. Now we're at sold-out-Wembley level, we're missing playing small clubs."
"Always greener on the other side, right?" His friend replied darkly.
"Life's a bitch," Gerard agreed.
As they approached the huge building in front of then, Frank poked Way's side and pointed. There was already a small gaggle of fans outside the stadium, pressing against the front gates, as though hoping to get in earlier. They hadn't noticed the two band members, as of yet, but if they lingered there much longer, it would only be a matter of time.
The singer glanced at the shorter man, who shrugged. Gerard grinned, then sauntered over to the group. The resultant screams confirmed that most of them were girls. Iero rolled his eyes at this. It wasn't that he resented them or anything, most were awesome, but seriously, it really wouldn't hurt to have a few more hard-core fans who were actually dudes. All the same, he followed his friend over to the gates, where the over-excited teens were pushing pieces of paper through the gaps and all talking at once.
Way was staying just out of hand's reach, but was snagging papers to sign, before throwing them back into the small crowd. He was almost teasing, but his genuinely warm grin, and the fact that he'd come over in the first place, proved that he wasn't being malicious.
When Frank moved to stand next to him, the noise doubled, and he laughed and waved, before copying his friend by reaching for pieces of paper to scrawl his illegible signature on. This kept up for a good ten minutes, before the two seemed to have satisfied most of the group. Then they waved and turned back to the building to get ready for tonight's show.
The hours between arriving at wherever the concert was being hosted, and actually getting on stage always passed in a frantic blur to Gerard. It hadn't been as bad recently, now that they scarcely ever wore make-up any more, but changing, doing sound checks, and listening to the roar echoing from inside the building build up was something that the singer could never keep track of. It wasn't until the routine high-fives, jumping jacks, and hugs that it finally hit the man that he was about to perform to tens, hundreds, thousands, tens of thousands of people. Then he was rushed on stage so fast he didn't have time to get nervous. It was best off this way though.
Today it was even worse. His mind wasn't on the preparations at all - it was completely preoccupied with his prior conversation with Frank. When he was first spotted by his friend, coming out of that hotel room, he was terrified. What was the man going to think of him? Hooking up like this again, so soon after his divorce? Hooking up with a guy?
After he'd got past that though, some small part of him was anticipating the impending conversation that was going to occur between him and Iero. He wanted to know what his friend thought, and, if there was a fight, if things got heated enough, perhaps Gerard would get the guts to admit the feeling that had been building up in him for a while.
Obviously though, that didn't happen. And Frank's lack of... anything, was the worst reaction the singer could imagine. The man didn't even care. He just didn't want Gerard to get hurt.
Of fucking course.
It was stupid though. Of course he didn't. He was Way's friend, as far as the guitarist was concerned, the other man's sex life had nothing to do with him. It was just the same as the singer felt about Mikey, or Ray. He shouldn't think that just because his feelings were messed up, that Frank would be the same. Because they weren't. And Gerard wasn't going to piss around, waiting for that to change.
Because it wouldn't.
Feeling slightly strengthened by his new resolve, the singer marched out of the dressing room to do his sound checks.
Frank was in there - of course - but he just smiled at Gerard, and went back to fiddling with his guitar. Way was given a mic, which he obligingly sung a few songs into before being told to stop, in order not to wear his voice out.
Then there were other things that needed to be sorted out, and people were asking about lighting, double checking the set list, asking him to please not go stage diving (not that he'd done that in a long time anyway, or planned to, anytime soon) and so on. Strangely enough, he found a few minutes to himself back in the dressing room.
There was stage make-up in the drawer there, and Gerard found himself staring at the the black eye paint for a few minutes. He hadn't worn make-up on stage in what felt like forever. Certainly not for a few years. He looked up to where a mirror was placed over the dressing table. The lights lit up his face, making him look pale. Boring.
The singer stared at himself for a few moments, contemplating. Then he shrugged and helped himself to the black, applying it thickly around his eyes. After a few minute's effort he got the look he wanted - one he hadn't worn since the Black Parade. He looked dead.
It wasn't quite corpse-like, but he'd probably freak enough people out with this sudden change, with out going all-out. Plus, he no longer was obsessed with death, with dying - not like he used to be. It was still an interesting concept, but the singer's days of looking like a ghost were behind him.
Gerard's thoughts were interrupted by a frantic voice telling him that the supporting band had finished, and they were up in ten minutes. He got up and let the stage-hand lead him through the maze that was backstage, and to his band mates.
They were leaning again the walls in the wings to the stage, just out of sight of the crowd. Mikey glanced over when he heard his brother enter, his eyes widening slightly as he took in Gerard's appearance.
"I thought you'd given up on the whole dead person thing," He said idly. The singer knew his brother to well to fall for that though - he could see the cogs working in his younger sibling's head, as he wondered what to make of this.
"It's just a bit of eyeliner," He said defensively. "I'm not planning of going all corpse-like again anytime soon. I just thought I looked a bit boring, you know?"
Mikey nodded, then smiled, clearly believing his brother. That was good - after all, Gerard wasn't lying on this occasion.
"He was wearing eyeliner the other day anyway." Frank put in. Both of the Ways turned to look at him at that comment. "What? I couldn't have been the only one who noticed."
Ray and Mikey glanced at each other, shrugging.
"Well... we all know you love me Frankie," Gerard teased after an awkward moment of silence.
The guitarist laughed. "You wish, Gee, you wish."
"Tell me about it," The other man giggled back. It was odd how easy it was to pretend to be joking.
“You’re on in five,” A stage-hand warned.
"We’d better start getting ready then,” Ray said, grinning around at his friends, like this wasn’t something they did every other day.
They started up on their ritual of jumping-jack, leading on to group hugs. They were such pansies.
As Gerard took part of their pre-show routines, he began thinking again. Apparently Frank wasn’t as oblivious as he’d like to pretend. Perhaps... perhaps his earlier indifference was faked, and he did care. Perhaps those feelings weren’t as one sided as Way thought.
It was dizzying, changing his mind this often.
Well, he had a way to test his theory.
Well, this should be fun. After all they're guys and really unsubtle, so Gerard'll just go to Frank and say "I want your babies."
Sorry, still raging about that.
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Part of the chocolate cake I made for those who do!
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