Categories > Celebrities > My Chemical Romance > Cross My Heart
Ch 11 cause I swear, I don't care.
Josh's POV
I look at my clock for the fifth time this hour. My mom is calling me for lunch. I have no idea what I'm gonna eat, I am having serious withdrawal, and I don't think eating is gonna help. I go to the kitchen, and mom is talking to Aerosmith, as they are recording.
I grab a plate of Chinese food, and start to eat it. I just sit there, eating. I don't care if I look off, I'm fucking starving. Okay, starving probably wasn't the right word. I finish the food, finally.
"Hey, can I go to my room mom?"
"Sure honey, you can go start your homework as well."
"Thanks!" I say grinning. I fucking am a genius!
I excuse myself to purge. I turn on the sink water, to drown out my retching. I shove two fingers down my throat, as I feel the food come back up.
I purge until I am sure everything's out. I then look at myself. My black hair is sticking to my face, that is unusually pale, my stomach is jolting around, and I know it's the heroin this time. I fall back on the floor, and throw up again. I hate throwing up, but its the only way for me to be thin!
I throw up for at least an hour, and look at my shirt. It's sweaty and smells like puke. I gag at the smell, and quickly take off the shirt, and throw it in the laundry.
Note to self: do laundry and weigh myself.
I grab the scale, and stand on it, looking at the numbers: 120 lbs...Fuck, I need to be skinnier! I throw the scale in the sink, screaming.
WHY AM I SO FUCKING FAT?!
*More added!! R&R please?? Xo Jules*
Josh's POV
I look at my clock for the fifth time this hour. My mom is calling me for lunch. I have no idea what I'm gonna eat, I am having serious withdrawal, and I don't think eating is gonna help. I go to the kitchen, and mom is talking to Aerosmith, as they are recording.
I grab a plate of Chinese food, and start to eat it. I just sit there, eating. I don't care if I look off, I'm fucking starving. Okay, starving probably wasn't the right word. I finish the food, finally.
"Hey, can I go to my room mom?"
"Sure honey, you can go start your homework as well."
"Thanks!" I say grinning. I fucking am a genius!
I excuse myself to purge. I turn on the sink water, to drown out my retching. I shove two fingers down my throat, as I feel the food come back up.
I purge until I am sure everything's out. I then look at myself. My black hair is sticking to my face, that is unusually pale, my stomach is jolting around, and I know it's the heroin this time. I fall back on the floor, and throw up again. I hate throwing up, but its the only way for me to be thin!
I throw up for at least an hour, and look at my shirt. It's sweaty and smells like puke. I gag at the smell, and quickly take off the shirt, and throw it in the laundry.
Note to self: do laundry and weigh myself.
I grab the scale, and stand on it, looking at the numbers: 120 lbs...Fuck, I need to be skinnier! I throw the scale in the sink, screaming.
WHY AM I SO FUCKING FAT?!
*More added!! R&R please?? Xo Jules*
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