FicWad

A/N I am awfully sorry about the long wait for this chapter, college has been extremely time consuming. Now I've settled in I should be uploading chapters regularly like I used to :) R&R beautiful

Gerard POV

That place in my mind, is that space that you call mine.

I was finally returned to my usual spot in my basement bedroom, the chilled October dusk filtering into my room through my window. Well…I think it is October.

Peeking out from under my duvet I stretched my aching arms restlessly and rubbed my tired eyes. Then reopened then to reveal which seemed like a totally different place.

Unrecognisable scented candles flickered their dim subdued light across my walls, the aroma gently caressing my senses. Straining my eyes I concentrated on the nearest candle to me. A duplicated combined smell of vanilla, cherry and spiced apples calmed my nerves. It was extremely alleviating.

My floor was clear. The chaotic mess had vanished and was neatly arranged around my room, even the posters which corners hung limply from the wall were now re-stuck back on, and my black curtains were drawn, just how I liked it.

I could feel a soft flow of warmth hug my surroundings, relieving me more. It was lovely. I felt safe and secure for the first time in a long time. I absorbed the relaxing atmosphere for a few moments, patiently waiting for my last dose of sedation to decrease slightly.

Content, I manoeuvred myself from under the bed covers and shakily stood up, my eyesight obscured in black for a couple of seconds. I waited for the dizziness to subside and I moved towards my desk. A rectangle box lay proudly in the middle, delicately wrapped in black tissue paper and beautifully tied up with a lime green ribbon, a label tied and attached with thread on top. Raising my eyebrows curiously I carefully undid the thread to the label and read it. I couldn’t help let a smile escape.

Good Morning Beautiful,

Here’s a little something I found for you. I hope you like, I’m pretty hopeless at romantic messages but I know you’re smiling that gorgeous smile of yours right now. The one where you eyes sparkle like emeralds,
That was a bit clichéd.
Fuck it.

I Love you beautiful,
Frankenstein
Xox

Grinning like an idiot I methodically unwrapped the paper, tying the green ribbon around my wrist. It was a brand new set of oil pants, the really expensive ones I was telling Frankie about ages ago. I can’t believe he remembered…

A warm tear rolled down my cheek, as I wiped it away with the back of my onesie sleeve and stoked the paints hungrily. I really don’t deserve someone as perfect as my little Frankie, not in a million years.

Running my fingers through my hair I realised how greasy and tangled it was. Rolling my eyes I headed towards the bathroom. There was a note on the mirror, again from Frankie.

I wish I could see that beautiful face of yours right now Gee. Anyway, fresh towels are in the cupboard and I brought some shampoo and shit for you. It smells good. ^.^ Love you!

Frankenstein
Xox

Giggling quietly and shaking my head I opened the cupboard and clutched to the soft material. I turned the switch to the shower on and let the refreshing steam warm up the room, my mind feeling at ease. Stripping, I stepped into the shower, my ugly scars covering both my arms. Frowning I looked down at my feet.

I let the hot water run down me for the few seconds, before reaching for the new shampoo Frankie had gotten me. Squeezing a generous amount in the palm of my hand I lathered my body. Foam bananas came to mind. I smiled to myself as that was just a Frankie thing to get.

My mood was picking up again as I washed my hair and exited the shower feeling fresher and a bit more human. I wrapped the towel around my waist and half skipped out of the bathroom, humming happily under my breath. As I reached the wardrobe there was another message stuck onto it. Fucking hell…this must have took Frankie ages!

Hello again!

I brought you some new black skinnies! I thought you would look hot in them, well, more than already if that’s possible. I’m sorry if they don’t fit, they’re the smallest I could find.

Love you baby,
Frankenstein
Xox

Flinging open my wardrobe doors I pulled out the new skinnies. They looked fucking tiny, there was no way I was going to fit into these. Quickly drying my legs I shuffled into the skinnies. They fit perfectly!

I couldn’t help but smile.

I switched my IPod on my docking station and out The Misfits Astro Zombies on, singing at the top of my voice. I threw on just a plain black top and my Misfits hoody and returned the bathroom, towel in hand. I dried my hair and attempted to straighten it, followed by some smudged eyeliner. Brushing my teeth I thought about what to do today. I’m definitely not ready to go out yet; I might just chill with Frankie and watch a film.

Wait…

Where is Frankie?

Panic surged through my body as I raced out of my bedroom and up the stairs, screaming Frankie’s name.

Oh God what if he’s dead?

Struggling to breathe I raced up the stairs and banged viciously on Mikey’s locked bedroom door. A sleepy bed headed Mikey opened the door in shock, tears streaming down my face, my eyeliner following.

‘Gerard what’s happened? What’s the matter?’ Mikey hushed, wrapping his arms around my neck and letting me sob gently into his bare bony shoulder.

‘I’ve l-lost..Fr-Frankie.’ I stuttered, quivering between cries.

‘No you haven’t Gerard. He’s just gone shopping with Mom, he left you a note on the kettle.’ Mikey cooed, pushing me back and smiling at me.

Exhaling sharply I rested my head on the wall, rubbing my face hopelessly.

Fuck…

‘Come here.’ Mikey said softly, rubbing the face with his thumb to remove any stray eyeliner marks.

‘Thank you.’ I whispered back hoarsely to him, nodding.

Flashing me a smile one more time Mikey vanished into his lair again and I weakly walked back towards the kitchen. I felt like shit.

Switching the kettle on I read the note Frankie left.

Gee cakes,

I know you’re probably getting annoyed with me mothering you, but your darling mother and I have gone shopping for a bit, we’ll be back at 2. Oh, and if I find out from Mikes that you have been worrying yourself about my where abouts when I get back you will be in trouble mister!

Love you,
Frankenstein xox

P.S I left you a box of cigarettes in the bits and bobs draw, don’t tell your Mom she will slaughter me.

Eyes wild, I flicked on the kettle and scuttled to the bits and bobs draw, where there were Red Marlboro cigarettes as promised. Smiling and unwrapping the packaging I opened the back door and pulled out the cancer stick. Reaching in my hoody pocket I retrieved a lighter and lit the stick until fiery embers danced in the chilly breeze, the familiar head rush flooding back to me.

It was sure good to be home.

The environment surrounding me was totally frozen over. It all looked beautiful, so delicate. One thing that especially caught my eye was a spider web attached from one bush to the other, sparkling iced jewels clinging onto the legs of the web, weighing it down.

Calmly, I exhaled a breathe, the smoke thick and gentle, twisting elegantly in the breeze. My cheeks were frozen and the bitter October air bit my nose, making me shiver violently. Clasping onto the cigarette I attempted to control my shakes and take deep puffs, but my hands were shuddering too much. I was starting to feel weak.

I went to lean back on the wall when two muscular arms snaked their way around my waist, holding me up. Looking over my shoulder I saw a pair of warm chocolate eyes stare innocently back at me, lips crooked into a sweet smile.

Kissing my neck Frankie obtained the cigarette and popped it in my mouth for me, feeding my addiction. Neither of us said a word. We just stood their watching tiny exquisite snowflakes flutter to the floor, one or two resting on my face and melting, my pale complexion capturing the still sun, as Frankie said.

Soon enough the innocent miniscule snowflakes had soon enlarged, increasing the level of coldness I was experiencing. Frankie steered me away from the garden into the warmth of the kitchen, our clothes damp from the copious amounts of snow.

Smiling and shaking his bewitching face he stroked my cheek with the back of his hand, gazing into my eyes. Getting lost in his pretty eyes Frankie pecked my lips softly, once again caressing my cheeks, my heart pounding longingly.

‘Those jeans look fucking hot.’ He teased, winking and eyeing me up hungrily.

Jittering, I pulled a face and raised an eyebrow at him, shuffling uncomfortable on the spot. Biting my lip, I looked down at my feet. I scratched my head and tried not to let my eyes tear up. I had no idea why I wanted to cry. I just did.

Whimpering, Frankie lifted my chin up with his hand, and nervously focused on my face.

‘What’s up baby? Don’t you like them?’ He said worryingly, his sweaty hand clutching onto mine, fiddling with my fingers.

‘Y-yes, I love th-them, it’s j-just… I… don’t d-deserve a-all this…’ I began to stammer, a cold sweat erupting.

To my surprise, Frankie firmly pushed me back against the counter and leaned into me sternly, his breath hot and sweet on my frozen skin. Snivelling, I stifled a cry and a tear drop escaped.

‘Gerard.’ Panicking I swiftly looked at his face, his eyes were watery and his lips were trembling.

‘Please don’t say that Gee…Please please please. You’re beautiful, and I’m going to get you to realise that. Never say you don’t deserve things okay? You saved me, now I want to save you. Please let me do that baby.’

His voice was laced with intense desperation, and my heart mourned terribly for him. He was so gorgeous. I pressed my lips to his, his lip ring cold and his mouth warm. Just the way I liked it.

Nodding, he took a step back, his hair messy and sticking up in odd angles. Giggling I reached my hand up to press it all down, his fringe curling around his right eye. God, my Frankie is heavenly.

‘Lets make hot chocolate and watch a film?’ I suggested my voice croaky from my muteness.

Beaming, Frankie agreed frantically and rushed over to the stove, the hob producing bright flames as the clutter of a pan echoed around the kitchen. Content, I stared out the window to the garden, captivated by the occasional stray flake sticking to the window then sliding down the glass.

Frankie playfully bit my ear lobe, making me flutter and zone back to reality. He offered marshmallows for my hot coco, but I rejected the offer. I wasn’t ready to eat yet. Disheartened slightly, Frankie bowed his head and glanced out the window too, his smile quickly disappearing.

Come on Gerard, get your act together.

‘Frankie, can I have squirty cream and marshmallows instead?’ I asked light heartedly, smirking.

Thrilled, Frankie raced to the bridge and started assembling his creation, sneakily adding hundreds and thousands to the mixture for his own visual enjoyment. Chuckling, I accepted the coco gratefully and began to walk towards my bedroom, Frankie close behind.

This was blissful. I think I’ve fallen in love.