FicWad

I’d turned the music down. The beat was barely a whisper, and our silence was a little unsettling. I didn’t want to say goodbye but I had nothing else to say. “So, this is it.” Madelyn was the one to break the silence. Her voice was scratchy, as if a sob was nearby, but I knew she would not cry in front of me. She wasn’t that type of person. Though I hadn’t known her long, and I’d only recently gotten her to speak, her silence had spoken volumes and I felt like I truly knew her.

I had taken the time to get to know her reactions to things, when she wouldn’t speak to me. I could read the emotions on her face, and feel her in a way that words weren’t needed for.

In a way… her silence is what had gotten us this far.

“With this place?” I gestured towards the building she’d been locked inside of, while doctors attempted to ‘help’ her. “Sure.” I couldn’t look directly at her. Not if I wanted to act tough, which I kind of did. I didn’t like that I was such a pathetic excuse of a man. I wasn’t strong. I was emotional. I was emotional over this, and yet here she was… not shedding a single tear. “With me? No way.”

I could hear the teasing smile in her voice when she spoke. “You’ll find someone new to obsess over in no time. I saw a couple of pretty cute girls in there.”

I couldn’t even fake a smile. This seemed to be harder for me than it was for her, but I knew that couldn’t be true. She was just stronger than I was. “That’s not how it works.”

“Oh?” Madelyn chuckled. “Then tell me, how does it work? I’m intrigued.”

“Well, guys like me… we tend to obsess over just one girl for our entire life. So, until I die you’ll be my obsession. Scared?”

“Should I be?”

“I would never hurt you.” I wouldn’t.

“Not physically.”

“Or in any other way.” I replied.

Madelyn sighed. “Guys like you hurt girls like me. You don’t mean to but you do. You think you’re in love, and you make a girl think that it could be true. Do you see how that could hurt?”

“What makes you think I’m not?” I was afraid to ask the question. Love was a big thing, and it was true… I was a zero to sixty kind of guy when it came to love.

I developed feelings fast, but that didn’t mean I wouldn’t keep them.

“You’ll forget about me Gerard. Just give it time.”

“I don’t want to forget. I may not be head over heels in love but I do like you, and more than that… I care about you. We both know this is a bad thing, so why does it feel like you’re trying to break off a relationship we never really had in order to distract from that?”

Madelyn chuckled again. “You’re a smart boy, and that’s a big problem. Goodbye Gerard.”

I finally looked at her, attempting to memorize her features. I wanted to be able to see her every single time I closed my eyes. “Please don’t leave.”

“What do you want me to do?” Madelyn asked, hand hovering over the door handle.

“Stay. Run away with me. We could do it, you know.” I was getting a little crazy. It felt wrong to just let her go with /him/. It was wrong.

Madelyn leaned across, gently brushing her lips against mine. I closed my eyes as I focused completely on the kiss. “Goodbye.” I didn’t open my eyes until the door closed behind her.

It didn’t come to mind, until that moment, that she didn’t want me to come with her. She didn’t want me anywhere near her brother. She was afraid for me, more than she was afraid for herself.

And truth be told, I wouldn’t be able to act natural around him now.

I wasn’t an actor.

I wore my heart on my sleeve, and right now all of my emotions were tangled up with her and around her brother… that was dangerous.