FicWad

I followed him, knowing this isn't what I wanted. I wanted to be his friend, go on a date with him, get to know him, and the normal cliche things that permits romance. This wasn't romance, he was drunk, I felt heavy, dumb, and dizzy. Maybe I was drunk too. He was going to use me, theres no way this could go the way I wanted. The idea of kissing him was too exciting though, I couldn't think past it. I couldn't think about how he would most likely act like nothing happened the next day... I need to think this out.
My thoughts were interrupted by the door slamming behind us. I sat down on the bed and looked up at him. "Hi." I said meekly and began playing with my fingers. He looked at me and tilted his head. "I really wanted to talk to you." He began. Maybe this wasn't where I thought it was going... I looked up and he brushed back his hair with his hands. "I'm really curious and I know this is insensitive, but what happened last weekend?" It really was only just two nights ago and it almost pained me to think about it. How could just moments change everything, I was going crazy. Everything switched so fast, I felt like my dad. My attitude and actions, completely out of hand and unlike me. I looked up not really sure what to say. I tried to search for an excuse or something, "What do you mean?" I said, beating around the bush than anything. He just looked at me knowing my intentions, "You may think I know about this because of the rumors, but I'm more involved with it than you think." I just shot him a questioning glance. "I'm the one who found you in your apartment, I'm the one who took you in, how'd you even get the methadone? I know you don't have a narcotics problem." How the fuck did he find me in my apartment, how did he even get there? Fuck, my memory was so blank. Tears started to fall despite my desires to yell at him or question him, I needed answers. I tried to calm myself as he patiently waited for me to speak, "They were my mom's, she was trying to recover from heroin, but.. but" I just started sobbing again, I couldn't handle it. Why the fuck was I not just dead right now? No matter how I tried to compose myself, I couldn't stop shaking. "I should be dead right now." I choked out.
He came and sat down next to me, he didn't give me any comfort, just waited for my tantrum to end. Soon my breaths became steady and I looked over, "How did you know where I live, how the fuck did you even know what I was doing?" He looked into his hands then at me, "I've been.. observing you recently, I first started when I first saw you at the institute months ago. I was getting done with a session I was in and I saw you walk into one of the stay-in rooms. I at first thought you stayed there until I inquired at the front desk, the woman told me all about you. I was intrigued, your father having psychosis and your desire to still visit him was almost inspiring. I know your brother was quite ruthless so I feel like he could handle all of this with not a single tear shed." He looked at me. "You're mother is dead, isn't she?" I just started sobbing harder. I felt so weak. I just nodded with my head in my lap. Fuck. Why would he ever
"I'm sorry for being insensitive, I know you deal with insensitivity all the time though, but I'm sorry. You can ask me things if you choose." I just sighed trying for the millionth time to calm myself down. I needed to change, I needed to be tough and charismatic. I just looked at him, wanting him to understand this feeling he was bring upon me. "Why do you have "sessions" at the institute?" He didn't even blink or feel embarrassed. "Sociopathic tendencies." How fucking charming "Don't judge me on this, you don't seem all yourself lately now." He raised his eyebrow at me and frustration boiled in me. It makes sense now how he can be so close to Frank. Jesus Christ. I was so exhausted and done with this. It's not like I already felt insane and he had to say that. I'm not going to school tomorrow, fuck it, I need a day off. "Are you going to class tomorrow?" He asked. I just shook my head. "Thats not very like you at all either." He accused. I just shrugged not wanting to argue. "I'm sure you're friend is spending the night, she didn't seem fit to drive. You seem exhausted, you might as well sleep in here instead of the floor like the majority of those kids are going to end up." I just sighed and got in under the covers. Gerard got up and took the space next to me. I turned away from him and just sighed. As he started to lay in though, he took his arms and wrapped me up. I couldn't wiggle out even if I wanted to. It wasn't casual or flirty, it was almost demanding and suffocating. I tried to break free but he wasn't budging. He just pulled me in more and whispered, "Sorry, you're mine now and I'm not letting go. You're not visiting the hospital due to my neglect again, I'm done watching from afar."