Categories > Celebrities > My Chemical Romance > Learn to Fly

Learn to Fly - 36

by Poppana 2 reviews

Category: My Chemical Romance - Rating: PG-13 - Genres: Drama - Characters: Gerard Way - Published: 2013-01-27 - Updated: 2013-01-27 - 3976 words - Complete

Chapter 36: Hoochie Coochie Mama

“And STAY OUT!” Gerard shouted, slamming the door shut right on the boy’s face.

“What was that?” Gia snapped. She stood with her hands on her hips and her lips were a thin line which was a clear indication that she was really not happy.

“Just taking out the garbage,” he replied with a gleeful smile on his face. “You know, clearing out the space from all the filth.”

Gia rolled her eyes and crossed her arms. She was getting really tired of this. And what exactly was this? Gerard’s constant rudeness and hatred towards Lucas. All the she and Lucas were doing is sit quietly in the living room, watching TV, and Gerard had completely flipped his shit because, god forbid, his seventeen year old daughter dared to cuddle a little bit with her age-appropriate boyfriend.

“That was really rude,” Gia said with that stern voice that she used when her father was doing stupid things. “I am so tired of you treating Lucas like that! I mean, I have a boyfriend, so what?! Get over it! You’re ruining my life!”

The blonde girl stomped past her father, grabbed her jacket from the hook next to the door and ran after Lucas who hadn’t gotten far. Gerard stared after her for a moment, but then shrugged and decided that when it was time to get his revenge, none would be able to escape his wrath. God, that boy made him so angry.


“I mean, what is his deal?!” Gia raged, throwing her arms in the air out of sheer frustration.

“Gia, relax,” Lucas said lazily from the couch, trying to calm his enraged girlfriend down. Usually she was so cool and calm, but when it came to her father, Gia just turned into this angry monster.

“No, you know what, we’re gonna have to murder him,” the girl announced. “Yeah, it’s the only way!”

“Kill him? Yeah, that’ll make him like me,” he said and rolled his eyes. Gia groaned and plopped down on the couch next to him.

“I’m serious. What happens when we get married and he refuses to come? Who’s gonna walk me down the aisle?”

“Whoah, you two are getting fucking married?” Danny, who had been very uninterested in following the conversation up until now. He had thrown his lanky body across the recliner and mostly just tried to hear the TV over those two babbling idiots.

“Might as well accept it now,” Lucas shrugged. “Your dad is never going to like me, let alone accept me.”

“Is anyone going to ask for my opinion?” Danny asked.

“No,” Gia immediately remarked, but Lucas, as always, was right on board.

“What is it?”

“I think I know how to help with your problem. But you guys will owe me so bad.”

Danny quickly explained his plan, and in all it’s simplicity, Gia knew immediately it was going to work. Lucas, however, was surprisingly a bit more reserved.

“What exactly does all that include? Like... Touching and stuff?”

“You sound like my father,” Gia pointed out.

“Look, it’s a good plan, I’m just not sure if I want my best friend feeling up my girlfriend.”

Lucas looked concerned enough for Gia to lose the attitude which always inevitably came up when the topic was her father, and she spoke with a much calmer tone. “It’s going to work, though. It’s simple, all Danny has to do is show up. Look at him. One glance at him and my dad is going to lose his shit and he’ll never be able to say you’re the worst possibility when he knows what the alternative could be.”

“Hey! I’ll have you know that I can be very charming if I want to be! If I look a bit rugged, it’s because I choose to!” Danny protested, but his argument wasn’t even heard.

“Just think,” Gia continued, a small smile on her lips, eyes glued on her boyfriend. “You could come over whenever you wanted, he wouldn’t whine about me staying out late, he’d let you come up to my room, we wouldn’t have to sneak around him whenever we want to hang out, Frank would never spy on us ever again. We could actually do stuff without having to hide first.”

Lucas was definitely on board now. The grin on his face mirrored Gia’s. “What kind of stuff?”

Danny shook his head and sighed, knowing where this was going. This lovey dovey shit was absolutely disgusting. He kept his eyes on the TV (though they did stray a bit without his consent) when Gia climbed on Lucas’ lap and her fingers ruffled the hair at the back of his head, deepening the already very heavy kiss. Lucas’ hands started to trail up her back, dragging the fabric of her shirt along and exposing the tattoo on her lower back, and that’s when Danny decided to break it off.

“Okay kids, keep it PG, there are minors reading this story. Besides, aren’t you two supposed to be on some kind of abstinence pact or some shit?”

“Trust me, not if you ask me,” Lucas replied with a husky voice and tried to go for another kiss, but Gia pulled away and climbed off his lap.

“No, he’s right. There’s plenty of time for that when we’re on clear waters. For now we need to make my dad not want to kill you everytime you touch a part of me that doesn’t have fingers,” Gia agreed and then suddenly thought of something. “Hey, we should probably check with Hazel if this is okay.”

“Why? She’s not my girlfriend,” Danny scoffed.

“You’re still her property. Don’t question it,” Gia said and picked up her cell phone, phoned Hazel, and once she answered, Gia said: “Hey, do you mind if I borrow your boyfriend a bit?”

Gia could practically hear Hazel roll her eyes through the phone. “Danny is not my boyfriend.”

“Funny how you immediately assumed I meant Danny. Okay, if he’s not your boyfriend, what exactly are you two, then?”

“Sort of... Friends with benefits... But really more like strangers with benefits. It’s weird. Look, can I come over tomorrow? I need to talk to you about something.”

“Yeah sure. And you’re fine with me borrowing Danny?”

“Do whatever you want.”

“I might have to make out with him a tiny bit, is that cool?”

“Sure, enjoy,” Hazel said nonchalantly, and they hung up after saying bye.

“She says it’s fine,” Gia confirmed to the two boys.

“Excuse me, I’ve got a question,” Lucas started, looking slightly alarmed. “Is anyone going to ask my opinion on the making out part?”

Danny piped in: “I’m fine with it, if anybody cares.”

“I’m sorry, Lucas,” Gia apologized. No, she really wasn’t looking forward to even touching Danny. Sure he was a nice-ish boy and all, but really, he looked sort of... dirty. “I’ll try to avoid it! But if it comes down to it...”

“Fine,” Lucas grunted, though he looked very displeased. “But when my mom hates you and I have to make out with Scarlett Johansson, you’ll have to just be okay with it.”

Gia stifled the smile that was trying to creep up on her lips and managed to keep a straight face. “Yeah, I swear I’ll try not to die of jealousy when Scarlett Johansson throws herself at you.”

“So when are we doing this thing?” Danny asked, obviously enjoying this situation. According to what he’d heard from Lucas about Gia’s father, this was going to be fun.


A week later in the way household, things hadn’t really changed.

Gerard crossed his arms and glared at his wife like this was all her fault. “You didn’t have to invite him over, you know. We could have just found him at night, bashed his head in with a shovel and then buried him alive somewhere secluded. That’s all I wanted.”

“Honey, I love you, but if you sabotage another one of Gia’s relationships, I will be forced to kill you,” Lindsey explained very calmly. “I liked Lucas,” she continued, pressing the word ‘I’, as she handed her grumpy husband the bowl of salad to take to the table. She grabbed the lasagna herself, and they went to set them down on the dining table.

“Don’t get me wrong, I’m glad to see Lucas go, it’s just that...”

“You’d rather your daughter died alone and loveless, right?”


Lindsey shot him a very nasty look which shut him up. Fortunately for him, the front door opened and closed, which meant that Gia and whatshisface had arrived so Lindsey had no time to claw Gerard’s eyes out for that response.

“What’s this one’s name anyway?” Gerard asked when they headed for the door. Before Lindsey could answer, they both froze in place at the first sight of what seemed like every parent’s worst nightmare. When Gerard saw the piece of trash his daughter had dragged in, his initial reaction was to burn the boy. To drag Gia away from him, break his bones, and burn him alive. Because of his profession and his, well, colorful life, Gerard had seen people like this before, so he knew the type well. All of his senses screamed out ‘danger’.

“This is Danny,” Gia introduced, a wide smile on her face as the guy flung his arm around her shoulders and nodded at Gerard and Lindsey.

“What’s up,” Danny said, and Gerard couldn’t really decide if he was slurring because he was high as hell or if he just spoke like that. The guy’s hair was dyed bright red but the brown roots were showing, and it was cut into a short mohawk. There was a stubble on his jaw, which made him look a ton older than he really was, and though he wasn’t all that tall, he still seemed to tower over Gia who admittedly was very small. The vibe this guy was giving was not good at all. He was, to put it simply, dirty.

“Uh, bye,” Gerard said opening the door and signaled for the boy to leave. Lindsey slapped his arm and smiled at the boy.

“Show him to the table, Gia,” Lindsey gritted through her teeth. Gia shrugged, took Danny’s arm and led him to the dining room. Gerard almost went into cardiac arrest as the dirtbag moved his hand to Gia’s lower back as they walked.

“Oh that’s nasty,” Gerard groaned, feeling like throwing up when Danny’s hand touched the butt.

“I can’t believe you,” Lindsey sighed and shook her head in disbelief. “You don’t even know him! Don’t be so quick to judge him based on his looks.”

“He looks like a hobo punk whose hobby is date raping! Did you not see the butt groping?”

“Yeah but you don’t know him. For all we know, he could be a really nice boy. Give him a chance, please?”

Gerard really didn’t want to do that. All he wanted was for his daughter to never go near that guy ever again, but since he was all too familiar with his wife’s wrath when he acted too crazy, he decided to give it a chance. So there, the boy had one chance. After that he’d be free game for this angry, obsessively insane father.

But as they sat down to eat the lasagna Lindsey had made and Gerard had attempted to sneak poison into, Lindsey, too, began to realize that perhaps this boy wasn’t the ideal company for Gia.

“So then I dropped out of high school,” Danny said, his mouth so full that they could barely make out what he was saying. “Not like they would’ve let me stay there anyway, what with all the vandalism and setting the math teacher on fire, they were gonna expel me anyway. So after that, my parents of course kicked me out, I tried to get a job at this music store but after I fucked the bosses daughter they wouldn’t hire me anymore.” Somewhere in the middle of that tale he managed to swallow the food in his mouth and dug out a pack of cigarettes and a lighter from his pocket. “You guys don’t mind if a smoke, do you?” he asked, lighting a cigarette. After that he stretched his arm around Gia who was sitting next to him. “Oh, did I already mention that trip to jail I had? Yeah, something about the gas station robbery, but they had no proof and I was a minor anyway. But hey, the money was right there, what was I supposed to do, right?” he continued with a laugh. “Hey babe, get me another beer, will you?”

“Of course,” Gia said and rose from her seat after giving Danny a kiss on the cheek. She shot her appalled father a smile and then disappeared into the kitchen. Danny made sure to check out the girl’s butt as visibly as possible as she walked.

“Damn,” Danny grinned. “You did a good job on her. I mean I don’t mean to brag but I’ve had better. Still, the things I’ll do that ass. I’ll tell you, there is nothing hotter than fucking a chick from behind when she’s got one of those tramp stamp tattoos, right? Thanks babe,” he added when Gia came back from the kitchen and handed him the already opened can of beer.

“What are we talking about?” Gia asked.

Danny grinned and said: “Our plans for tonight.”

Gerard rose from his chair so quickly that the chair nearly fell over. Lindsey rushed to grab his arm before he could jump over the table to stab Danny to death with a butter knife. “Honey don’t do it,” she whispered to her husband before saying to the two teens: “We’ll be back in just a bit. Have more lasagna.”

Lindsey pulled him out of the room before he could have a chance to protest.

“What the hell?” Gerard demanded. He was clearly not far from exploding.

“Don’t you dare hurt that boy,” Lindsey snapped angrily.

“I’m sorry but I don’t think we’ve been listening to the same guy! Didn’t you hear what he said?! He’s a nightmare! What the fuck is she doing with a guy like that?!”

“I know he seems... Well, douchey, and yeah I don’t like him either. But Gerard, don’t you think there’s something a bit weird about all this?”

“Weird?! WEIRD?!”

“Listen, isn’t it strange how she was so in love with Lucas and the next day they broke up and now suddenly she’s with this... Whatever he is. Besides doesn’t Danny kind of look familiar to you?”

“No he doesn’t, you know why? Because I’m not a CRIMINAL like he is, we don’t exactly roll in the same circles. Now excuse me, I have some murdering to do.”

Lindsey threw her arms in the air and shook her head. She knew there was more to this thing than meets the eye, but she was also very well aware that there was no way Gerard would see anything other than the knife he wanted to insert into Danny’s eye repeatedly and violently. Nonetheless, she followed her husband back to the dining room where she found him, staring at the empty room in shock.

“Where did they go?” she asked, but Gerard already knew the answer.

He glared up at the ceiling and growled: “Oh hell no.”

Upstairs in her room, Gia threw herself on the bed and couldn’t wipe the smile from her face. “Oh I love to see him squirm,” she laughed.

“Yeah. Though I don’t know why, I got the feeling your father doesn’t like me,” Danny said sarcastically and looked around the room. He looked at the vanity table and saw a picture of Gia and Lucas at the edge of the mirror and made a face. Those two were so cheesy.

“You are so good,” Gia said. “How did you come up with all that stuff?”

“What stuff?”

“You know, the robbery, setting the teacher on fire, all that crap about the illegal drug smuggling? Oh, and my favorite, the brothel where you lived in for a month before they noticed you were there?”

“Who said I came up with anything?”

Gia wasn’t sure whether to believe that all of that was true or not, so she decided to ignore it.

“What’s in here?” he asked and opened a drawer. Inside was all of her underwear. “So when you and Lucas are in his room and I hear you two giggle, are you wearing these? If you are, then I think I understand why he always looks so smug after it.” He was holding up some very small black panties with lace on them.

“Do you mind?” Gia snapped and went to him, slamming the drawer shut. Her cheeks had turned slightly red from embarrassment. “Just because you’re my pretend-boyfriend doesn’t mean you get to see that stuff. And no, when we’re in his room that’s not what we’re doing. For your information we don’t do that stuff anymore.”

“Oh but you know he wants to. I’ve never seen anyone so sexually frustrated. He has to take cold showers twenty times a day just to get rid of the boners and he has a picture of his grandma on the nightstand because otherwise he wouldn’t be able to sleep. Just let the guy out of his misery already. Take off your shirt.”

That last sentence took a moment to register in Gia’s brain. “What?” she finally stuttered out and looked at him like he’d gone insane.

“Someone’s coming up the stairs, take off your shirt,” Danny repeated as if he was speaking to a retard.

“No! You take off yours!” Gia snapped. Taking off her clothes was where she drew the line.

“Look, there’s only so much I can do by myself, your dad’s not going to get mad enough by that. We need to do something more drastic. Come on, Lucas said it was okay!”

Gia hesitated. It was one thing to say she could do it but another to actually do it. She was doing this so she could freely be with Lucas, but what was the point if she felt so guilty that she couldn’t even be around him after this was over? Her heart started beating faster because of the pressure. There was a loud knock on the door.

Outside of the door in the hall, Lindsey was trying to calm her husband down. “They’re probably just talking,” she said. “It’s not like they’re stupid enough to do something like that with us in the house.”

But when Gerard opened the door, Lindsey’s words were proven wrong. What a shocker. Imagine a nuclear explosion, but about ten times worse. That’s how Gerard felt when all the pent-up anger from that night got the best of him. Seeing Gia with Lucas had always been a huge source of discomfort and homicidal rage, but now, seeing his daughter in a full liplock with Danny, well, that made all that crap with Lucas seem like a picnic.

Gerard glanced at his wife, who sighed and nodded. “Go ahead,” Lindsey remarked, giving him a permission to act and got out of the way.

Gia gasped in (faked) surprise when Danny was pulled away from her. That was the last she saw of him, because only a split-second later Gerard had dragged the poor guy out of the door, down the stairs, and thrown him out on the yard. Gia followed them with Lindsey who eyed her suspiciously.

“If you have something to say, just say it,” Gia said calmly while they were on the stairs and Gerard was raging at Danny.

“I know what you did,” Lindsey said, however the hint of a smile on her face destroyed every attempt at sounding judgemental.

“I have no idea what you’re talking about,” Gia said with a shrug of the shoulders.

“What the hell was that?!” Gerard raged, having now finished things with the creep that had been feeling up Gia a few moments ago.

Gia got into defence-mode and hollered right back at him: “Are you fucking serious?! Are you going to do that to EVERY boyfriend of mine?! You can’t treat people like that!”

“Maybe I wouldn’t have to if you didn’t date criminals! I’m trying to protect you here, is that so bad?!”

“YES! You have to let me live! I’m going crazy with you nagging me all the time, it’s getting to the point where I don’t even want to SEE you! If you keep doing this, after I move away, I’m not coming back.”

Gerard felt some of the anger fade. He realized she was just saying that to make him mad, but also he knew there was a hint of truth there. He was no longer shouting when he said: “Either way, you’re not seeing Danny again. And that’s final. Hell, he’s a hundred times worse than Lucas ever was, and you know I hate Lucas!”

“Well you should’ve thought about that before you decided to hate him without even getting to know him,” Gia pointed out. “Dad, I could do so much worse than Lucas.”

“You could do better, too.”

Gia shook her head. “There’s no one better.”

“Just promise me, no more Danny. At all. Whatever you do, guys like that are off the table, alright? No more criminals and sex-addicts and... God knows what else.”

“Does that mean you won’t nag me about Lucas anymore?” Gia asked, sounding hopeful and then realized she was playing a role here. “I mean, provided that we get back together... Of course...”

“Well...” Gerard hesitated. He wanted to keep at least some of the nagging rights, he had to do that, he was the father. But he did understand that he had to compromise at least a bit here. “I swear I’ll tone it down.”

“And you swear you won’t go all psycho and kick him out?”

“As long as he keeps it in his pants.”

“Okay then. That’s all I’m asking,” Gia said and saw the matter settled, so she returned to her room to phone Lucas and let him know of the success.

Lindsey on the other hand stared at her husband in disbelief. She couldn’t believe he hadn’t seen how he had been played, and feared the day when he’ll figure it out. Hopefully for all of their sakes, that day will never come.


A/N: Right, I'm sorry this took so long and no, I am not surprised if there's no one waiting around anymore. I wouldn't wait this long. But in case there is still someone out there, there aren't many chapters left and we're nearing the end. We can do it! I have started nearly all of the chapters, and I'm sort of writing all of them at once, depending on what I feel like writing that day.
I went swimming today.
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