Categories > Books > Harry Potter > Business Meeting

Chapter Seven

by paracelsus 1 review

Two dark lords lay their plans.

Category: Harry Potter - Rating: G - Genres: Humor - Characters: Dudley, Fred, George, Harry, Voldemort - Warnings: [!!] - Published: 2006-07-29 - Updated: 2006-07-29 - 534 words

5Exciting
Voldemort surveyed his followers with disdain. "So, Potter is no longer at his aunt's house, his aunt
is no longer in the country and yet you say I still cannot harm him."

"My lord, he is living with his cousin who still carries his mother's blood."

"True, but a cousin's blood has been diluted. The protection should be weaker."

"It seemed so at first, my lord, but the protection is growing stronger every day. We cannot tell why."

"Then we shall find out. If you cannot bring me Harry Potter, bring me his cousin."

The plan was carefully worked out. Black, Greyback and Voldemort himself would lead attacks in
widely separated areas of the country to draw away the Order of the Phoenix. Rosier and Jugson
would lead the kidnap gang. They would rush the shop at closing time and drag Dudley to a waiting
Portkey.

" Surely you can manage to capture one fat muggle child," Voldemort said. "And on your way out,
set the shop on fire, the Weasley's are disgracing the name of wizard with their antics."

In another part of London, another dark lord was also addressing his followers in slightly less refined
language.

"OK, you **heads let's go over this again. First Joey and Mikey go to a joke shop to do a simple
shakedown and they end up in a dustbin. Not a mark on either of them. No explanation. Right?"

"Right, Big Jim."

"Next, I tell Petey to take a knife with him. He ends up on a school roof, the knife is gone but he has
a great big carrot in his belt. No explanation. Right?"

"Right Big Jim."

"Now I'm getting f*ing desparate. A mate from Surrey asks me to collect a simple little debt for
him and you guys keep messing it up. So I tell Timmy he can take a gun with him. That is crazy.
What kind of a guy needs a gun to shakedown a fat schoolboy? But I'm desperate. I need results. And
what results do I get? Timmy is tied up in a ladies toilet, his gun is gone ... vanished ... no trace ... but
he's holding a bunch of daffodils. And still no explanation?"

"Not a thing."

"So, what happened?"

"I was so careful, boss," Timmy whimpered, as Jim struck him in the face. "I watched the shop for
an hour before I went in. The fat kid was alone. The skinny kid with glasses had gone out. There's
no back door. So, I went in and pulled my gun. Then I heard this popping sound behind be and two
big guys with red hair were standing behind me. That's the last I remember ..."

"He's telling the truth, boss," Joey added. "I was on lookout. No one went into the shop after
Timmy."

"So what is it with these Weasleys? Are they real f*ing wizards? Can they turn people into toads
and appear out of thin air? "

Big Jim gave his orders. The whole gang would come. They would rush the shop at closing time and drag Dudley
to a waiting car. On their way out, they would torch the shop.

"We're going to teach those Weasleys a lesson."
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