Categories > Celebrities > My Chemical Romance > The Story of The Lost Boys
Something Unholy
0 reviewsA chapter in which Frank has to deal with the return of someone he thought to be long dead.
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The Story of The Lost Boys
Something Unholy.
Fun Ghoul’s POV
“Deviant, where did you find her?” The Prophet questioned, Deviant looked to him emotionless “We found her unconscious on the border between here and Bat city, we almost didn’t bring her back…”
“You should have left her there.” I interrupted, The Prophet looked at me in disapproval “And why is that?” he asked darkly, I glared at the unconscious figure “because that face is one I saw die two years ago…” I trailed off, The Destroyer looked at me “Are you sure?” he asked “I believe him.” The Prophet answered, he placed a hand on my shoulder “We share the same look in our eye you and me, the look of loss, I lost someone I loved too…” he trailed off and looked to the Deviant “Take the girl to Juliet’s room.” The Mystic’s eyes widened “…Are you sure?” he asked, the Prophet nodded “yes I’m sure, that beds been empty long enough, it could go with some use.” And then I saw it, the sadness in his eyes that came just from saying her name.
Deviant carried her away and into the make shift building, the others following him, Prophet looked down to me “We will talk tomorrow, feel free to stay the night, Psychic will take you to a spare room when you’re ready…” he said gently before following the others inside. Once they were gone the tears began to roll down my face, this pain was something I never thought I feel again, every day the feeling dulled but the emptiness remained, and now, it’s here again, the sharp stabbing pains in my chest as if someone has taken a machete and pierced it through my torso, I fell to my knees small clouds of sand created from the force of my knees against the hot desert floor.
“Ghoul…” I heard Poison say softly and slightly breathless as he knelt down beside me “What happened, who was it?” he asked oblivious, I shook my head “She shouldn’t be here…it’s not natural, it’s not holy, it’s not right, she’s dead, she’s been dead for years, and yet she’s merely sleeping, only a few metres away from me, how can that be Gerard?” he glared at me for using his real name, but his gaze softened quickly once he realised that after all this, I didn’t want to call him something false, because I didn’t need Party Poison right now, I didn’t need a leader, I needed Gerard, I needed my best friend, he wrapped his arms around me and whispered “It was Jennifer wasn’t it?” the sound of her name stung like a knife, I only nodded, the tears still rolling down my face, I heard his breathing get heavier as if he was controlling his anger, he let me go and looked at me “I’m going to tell the others…will you be okay?” he asked, I looked at him and nodded, he then stood up and held out a hand and assisted me as I got up from the floor “I’ll take him to the room, while you discuss this with the others” Psychic announced, Poison nodded and Psychic held out a hand, I took is cautiously but she only squeezed it slightly in comfort a small smile on her face she began to walk and I followed her as her grip on my hand tightened slightly, I quickened my pace so we were walking side by side “You can call me Lindsey you know…if it makes you feel more comfortable, I don’t mind, I prefer using real names too. However I know you’re over ruled by Gerard on that front…” she finished a small smile spread across my face “Thank you, I don’t like having these false identities, I just wish we could do this as ourselves, not pretending to be someone else…” I sighed sadly, but Lindsey smiled at me, her hand still holding mine “Frank a different name doesn’t mean a different person, you of all people should know that…” she said softly, I shrugged “I don’t know, sometimes I feel like Fun Ghoul is completely another part of me, that should stay deep inside and never come out but I think it just takes over, like I can’t be myself anymore…” I trailed off again, as we were walking I noticed how we were walking past multiple empty rooms that I could have waited in but instead she led me further into the maze of hallways “Lindsey, where are we going?” I asked curiously, looked to me “I know I said I’d take you to a spare room, but I think you should see her first, see her properly, I’ll stay with you, but I think you should look at her properly with your own eyes and let it sink in…” she finished and we stopped walking, we stood in front of a large wooden door, she placed a hand on the handle and looked at me “are you ready?” she asked, I took a deep breath “this is something no one is ready for…” I answered; she nodded “Good answer.” She said before pushing the door open, I looked into the room and on the furthest side, lying in the centre of the double bed was Jennifer, like something out of a fairy-tale, only I knew deep inside that this would never have a happy ending, I wasn’t her prince charming and she could never be my princess, I walked over to where she lay and looked at her, I heard the door close behind me but I knew Lindsey was still there, I placed my hand on Jennifer’s unmoving one, she was so cold, like death, as she should be, yet here she is, lying in front of me, breathing still, when once I watched her die, and I didn’t even bring her body home, which in the end, makes all this my fault, she wouldn’t be here if I’d taken her back to them and given her a burial, but no, I left her dead body to soak in the river, I looked around the room a spotted a chair in the corner, I walked over to it and dragged it back to beside the bed and sat there, I just sat beside her “Frank…” I heard Lindsey’s voice from behind, I turned to look at her “I need to see to the others, but you should know, she cares about you deeply.” I nodded and she left the room.
She cares deeply about me, but not in the way I care about her, it was never that for her, I was always just another brother to her, but to me every time I made her smile and every time I made her laugh, my heart skipped a beat and just knowing I made her happy made me happy, yet there was always a sadness in me, because I’d never be able to make her happy, in the way I wanted to make her happy, I wanted to brighten her world like she brightened mine, I wanted her to love me, the way I loved her, and the worst thing is, the very worst thing, is that even on that day, on the bridge, I knew she would let herself fall, and I still didn’t tell her how I felt, in fear she’d reject me, reject me with her last breath.
I sat there for what must have been hours, just watching the rise and fall of her chest, but I looked to her face and noticed how she’d aged, over the two years she’s been dead to us, she’s aged the same as us, her hair is longer, it’s a paler brown and she’s also lost weight, she seems slightly taller too, although she’s not standing, but she just seems quite long out stretched on the bed the way she is. But my gaze fell from her face to her neck, I squinted slightly, but then decided to lean in, I traced my finger gently over what appeared to be a scar that spread down from her jawline to her collarbone, pale and prominent like the ones I had on my wrists from my childhood, suddenly a hand grabbed mine and twisted me around so I was facing the door, my arm now being held tightly behind my back and my hand behind my head “Don’t. Touch. Me.” the three words came off heavily and defensive, the strength was something new but the voice was one that was far too familiar from my dreams. I twisted my head slightly to see her glaring at me, but when she saw me, her breath hitched and she dropped my arm from her grip, she crawled away from me so she was on the opposite side of the bed, she stared at me almost in fear, I turned back to face her properly and she breathed heavily, her eyes watering, after a few minutes she leant forward slightly, and then crawled back toward me, she cupped my face in her hands “F-frank…” she whispered, her eyes watering and a smile spreading across her face, I said nothing, words escaped me at this moment, I simply nodded and she took her hands away from my face and jumped on my causing the chair to rock back before regaining its balance again, her arms wrapped tightly around my neck and her head next to mine, my arms hesitantly wrapped around her waist and I held her tightly as close to me as our bodies would allow. “I’m so sorry.” I whispered, she pulled her head up and looked at me “You’re sorry?” she questioned, I nodded “I’m sorry I didn’t help you, I’m sorry I couldn’t make your life better, I’m sorry I was never good enough for you, I’m sorry I couldn’t save you…” I said breathing heavily a tear rolled down her face “Frank, please, please don’t tell me that you’ve blamed yourself for what I did…for the past two years.” She whispered, pain in her eyes, I looked away.
I have blamed myself, of course I have, and yet I knew blaming myself would be something she wouldn’t want me to do, she wouldn’t want me to feel the guilt, she wouldn’t want me to feel like her blood was on my hands, yet I still felt that way, I always felt that way and hearing the pain in her voice when she says it kills me a little inside…
“Frank…” she started but she was interrupted by the door opening behind me, she let me go and shuffled across the bed before standing up, I stood from the chair and turned around to see Gerard, Mikey and Ray standing at the door, I looked to Jennifer and a grin spread across her face and tears ran down her cheeks, she ran over to Gerard and jumped into his arms, he engulfed her in a hug and they exchanged ‘I missed you’ and ‘I love you’ she then did the same with Mikey, and then greeted Ray, as the four of them began having happy reunion conversations with each other, a sense of hopelessness evolved in me and I walked out of the room, leaving them to greet each other
There was a happiness in my heart, knowing she was back and alive, but at the same time, I didn’t trust her, I couldn’t trust her, I knew where she’d been, I knew this was Better Living’s doing, and everything they do has a reason, I hate the thought that they are using her as a weapon against us…a weapon against me.
I walked aimlessly through the hallways with no specific destination I walked, trying to understand the feelings and thoughts in my mind, but I just couldn’t, my heart was thrilled but my mind contradicted, my mind was telling me to stay away but my heart told me to tell her how I feel, how I’ve always felt but my mind conquers all, it always has, my thoughts have a wicked hold over me, that disregard everything else my body tells me to do, it makes me feel weak, but it also helps me, although I love her, my mind stops me from acting out, my mind helps me stay away and keep my distance, my mind over the past few years helped me forget, although in my dreams it would seem that my mind has no control.
Something Unholy.
Fun Ghoul’s POV
“Deviant, where did you find her?” The Prophet questioned, Deviant looked to him emotionless “We found her unconscious on the border between here and Bat city, we almost didn’t bring her back…”
“You should have left her there.” I interrupted, The Prophet looked at me in disapproval “And why is that?” he asked darkly, I glared at the unconscious figure “because that face is one I saw die two years ago…” I trailed off, The Destroyer looked at me “Are you sure?” he asked “I believe him.” The Prophet answered, he placed a hand on my shoulder “We share the same look in our eye you and me, the look of loss, I lost someone I loved too…” he trailed off and looked to the Deviant “Take the girl to Juliet’s room.” The Mystic’s eyes widened “…Are you sure?” he asked, the Prophet nodded “yes I’m sure, that beds been empty long enough, it could go with some use.” And then I saw it, the sadness in his eyes that came just from saying her name.
Deviant carried her away and into the make shift building, the others following him, Prophet looked down to me “We will talk tomorrow, feel free to stay the night, Psychic will take you to a spare room when you’re ready…” he said gently before following the others inside. Once they were gone the tears began to roll down my face, this pain was something I never thought I feel again, every day the feeling dulled but the emptiness remained, and now, it’s here again, the sharp stabbing pains in my chest as if someone has taken a machete and pierced it through my torso, I fell to my knees small clouds of sand created from the force of my knees against the hot desert floor.
“Ghoul…” I heard Poison say softly and slightly breathless as he knelt down beside me “What happened, who was it?” he asked oblivious, I shook my head “She shouldn’t be here…it’s not natural, it’s not holy, it’s not right, she’s dead, she’s been dead for years, and yet she’s merely sleeping, only a few metres away from me, how can that be Gerard?” he glared at me for using his real name, but his gaze softened quickly once he realised that after all this, I didn’t want to call him something false, because I didn’t need Party Poison right now, I didn’t need a leader, I needed Gerard, I needed my best friend, he wrapped his arms around me and whispered “It was Jennifer wasn’t it?” the sound of her name stung like a knife, I only nodded, the tears still rolling down my face, I heard his breathing get heavier as if he was controlling his anger, he let me go and looked at me “I’m going to tell the others…will you be okay?” he asked, I looked at him and nodded, he then stood up and held out a hand and assisted me as I got up from the floor “I’ll take him to the room, while you discuss this with the others” Psychic announced, Poison nodded and Psychic held out a hand, I took is cautiously but she only squeezed it slightly in comfort a small smile on her face she began to walk and I followed her as her grip on my hand tightened slightly, I quickened my pace so we were walking side by side “You can call me Lindsey you know…if it makes you feel more comfortable, I don’t mind, I prefer using real names too. However I know you’re over ruled by Gerard on that front…” she finished a small smile spread across my face “Thank you, I don’t like having these false identities, I just wish we could do this as ourselves, not pretending to be someone else…” I sighed sadly, but Lindsey smiled at me, her hand still holding mine “Frank a different name doesn’t mean a different person, you of all people should know that…” she said softly, I shrugged “I don’t know, sometimes I feel like Fun Ghoul is completely another part of me, that should stay deep inside and never come out but I think it just takes over, like I can’t be myself anymore…” I trailed off again, as we were walking I noticed how we were walking past multiple empty rooms that I could have waited in but instead she led me further into the maze of hallways “Lindsey, where are we going?” I asked curiously, looked to me “I know I said I’d take you to a spare room, but I think you should see her first, see her properly, I’ll stay with you, but I think you should look at her properly with your own eyes and let it sink in…” she finished and we stopped walking, we stood in front of a large wooden door, she placed a hand on the handle and looked at me “are you ready?” she asked, I took a deep breath “this is something no one is ready for…” I answered; she nodded “Good answer.” She said before pushing the door open, I looked into the room and on the furthest side, lying in the centre of the double bed was Jennifer, like something out of a fairy-tale, only I knew deep inside that this would never have a happy ending, I wasn’t her prince charming and she could never be my princess, I walked over to where she lay and looked at her, I heard the door close behind me but I knew Lindsey was still there, I placed my hand on Jennifer’s unmoving one, she was so cold, like death, as she should be, yet here she is, lying in front of me, breathing still, when once I watched her die, and I didn’t even bring her body home, which in the end, makes all this my fault, she wouldn’t be here if I’d taken her back to them and given her a burial, but no, I left her dead body to soak in the river, I looked around the room a spotted a chair in the corner, I walked over to it and dragged it back to beside the bed and sat there, I just sat beside her “Frank…” I heard Lindsey’s voice from behind, I turned to look at her “I need to see to the others, but you should know, she cares about you deeply.” I nodded and she left the room.
She cares deeply about me, but not in the way I care about her, it was never that for her, I was always just another brother to her, but to me every time I made her smile and every time I made her laugh, my heart skipped a beat and just knowing I made her happy made me happy, yet there was always a sadness in me, because I’d never be able to make her happy, in the way I wanted to make her happy, I wanted to brighten her world like she brightened mine, I wanted her to love me, the way I loved her, and the worst thing is, the very worst thing, is that even on that day, on the bridge, I knew she would let herself fall, and I still didn’t tell her how I felt, in fear she’d reject me, reject me with her last breath.
I sat there for what must have been hours, just watching the rise and fall of her chest, but I looked to her face and noticed how she’d aged, over the two years she’s been dead to us, she’s aged the same as us, her hair is longer, it’s a paler brown and she’s also lost weight, she seems slightly taller too, although she’s not standing, but she just seems quite long out stretched on the bed the way she is. But my gaze fell from her face to her neck, I squinted slightly, but then decided to lean in, I traced my finger gently over what appeared to be a scar that spread down from her jawline to her collarbone, pale and prominent like the ones I had on my wrists from my childhood, suddenly a hand grabbed mine and twisted me around so I was facing the door, my arm now being held tightly behind my back and my hand behind my head “Don’t. Touch. Me.” the three words came off heavily and defensive, the strength was something new but the voice was one that was far too familiar from my dreams. I twisted my head slightly to see her glaring at me, but when she saw me, her breath hitched and she dropped my arm from her grip, she crawled away from me so she was on the opposite side of the bed, she stared at me almost in fear, I turned back to face her properly and she breathed heavily, her eyes watering, after a few minutes she leant forward slightly, and then crawled back toward me, she cupped my face in her hands “F-frank…” she whispered, her eyes watering and a smile spreading across her face, I said nothing, words escaped me at this moment, I simply nodded and she took her hands away from my face and jumped on my causing the chair to rock back before regaining its balance again, her arms wrapped tightly around my neck and her head next to mine, my arms hesitantly wrapped around her waist and I held her tightly as close to me as our bodies would allow. “I’m so sorry.” I whispered, she pulled her head up and looked at me “You’re sorry?” she questioned, I nodded “I’m sorry I didn’t help you, I’m sorry I couldn’t make your life better, I’m sorry I was never good enough for you, I’m sorry I couldn’t save you…” I said breathing heavily a tear rolled down her face “Frank, please, please don’t tell me that you’ve blamed yourself for what I did…for the past two years.” She whispered, pain in her eyes, I looked away.
I have blamed myself, of course I have, and yet I knew blaming myself would be something she wouldn’t want me to do, she wouldn’t want me to feel the guilt, she wouldn’t want me to feel like her blood was on my hands, yet I still felt that way, I always felt that way and hearing the pain in her voice when she says it kills me a little inside…
“Frank…” she started but she was interrupted by the door opening behind me, she let me go and shuffled across the bed before standing up, I stood from the chair and turned around to see Gerard, Mikey and Ray standing at the door, I looked to Jennifer and a grin spread across her face and tears ran down her cheeks, she ran over to Gerard and jumped into his arms, he engulfed her in a hug and they exchanged ‘I missed you’ and ‘I love you’ she then did the same with Mikey, and then greeted Ray, as the four of them began having happy reunion conversations with each other, a sense of hopelessness evolved in me and I walked out of the room, leaving them to greet each other
There was a happiness in my heart, knowing she was back and alive, but at the same time, I didn’t trust her, I couldn’t trust her, I knew where she’d been, I knew this was Better Living’s doing, and everything they do has a reason, I hate the thought that they are using her as a weapon against us…a weapon against me.
I walked aimlessly through the hallways with no specific destination I walked, trying to understand the feelings and thoughts in my mind, but I just couldn’t, my heart was thrilled but my mind contradicted, my mind was telling me to stay away but my heart told me to tell her how I feel, how I’ve always felt but my mind conquers all, it always has, my thoughts have a wicked hold over me, that disregard everything else my body tells me to do, it makes me feel weak, but it also helps me, although I love her, my mind stops me from acting out, my mind helps me stay away and keep my distance, my mind over the past few years helped me forget, although in my dreams it would seem that my mind has no control.
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