FicWad

this letter was found in the flat of miss Christine Gold she asked for it to be published after she passed away


I miss you, I know I probably shouldn't I mean all we went through, hating each other to loving each other to hating to loving yet again, but I seem to be draw to you. I always was since that first day on the train.

I sat down next to you and you looked at me, something that's not really done in England, then you smiled when you saw my green day t-shirt. You took out one of your head phones and we got to know each other. We both lived in the same area of Worthing but went to different schools, we liked the same bands and both swore that batman didn't count as a real superhero. I smiled at that and we hung out after we got of the train, that's where we had the argument. I had told you that I didn't like your hair brown, that you should dye it and you got pissed off and we shouted and I stormed home, not thinking that one day I'd get on that same train and see you again.

I remember falling in love with you at first kiss. That first kiss on the train after we had done shouting you pressed me up against a wall and kissed me like you meant it in you heart.

I remember sitting in the park when I was crying about not being able to see you all the time because of my foster career. You hugged me tight and held me close. I went home with you that night and we talked all night.


I remember when your band got sighed. When My Chemical Romance was born. I sat and Dyed your hair black for you and we kissed in the hair dye fumes. Your kisses where soft and sweet.

I remember the fight about Frank, how you had kissed him on stage and how you where leading him on. I remember not seeing you for years after that.

I really thought I hated you back then, you left me on my own with nothing. I was so angry, so confused, so upset that you could do that to me. I saw you on the front of a magazine, your hair was bleached and short and I winced. I saw you had gotten married and I cried so much. I would never find you. I found hope after I heard she had cheated and you had moved back 'home'. You had dyed your hair firetruck red by then. I loved it.

I was over you finally when I was driving along in my car when I heard you voice on the radio.

so I wrote this for a girl I met on a train a long time ago, she was my everything for a long time, and I'll always love her.

" When the lights go out
Will you take me with you
And carry all this broken bone
Through six years down in crowded rooms
And highways I call home?
Something I can't know 'til now.
'Til you pick me off the ground
With a brick in hand, your lip-gloss smile,
Your scraped-up knees.

And if you stay I will either wait all night
Or until my heart explodes.
How long?
'Til we find our way in the dark and out of harm
You can run away with me anytime you want

Terrified of what I'd be
As a kid from what I've seen
Every single day when people try
And put the pieces back together
Just to smash them down
Turn my headphones up real loud
I don't think I need them now
'Cause you stopped the noise.

And if you stay I would even wait all night
Or until my heart explodes.
How long?
'Til we find our way In the dark and out of harm
You can run away with me anytime you want

Well anytime you want
Well anytime you want

Don't walk away [3x]

'Cause if you stay I will either wait all night
Or until my heart explodes.
How long?
Until we find our way In the dark and out of harm
You can run away with me anytime you want
You can write it on your arm
You can run away with me anytime you want"

I stopped my car and cried till I couldn't cry anymore.

It was then that the radio presenter told me where you where and I drove into worthing town centre. I saw you and we kissed again finally.

I remember the last time I saw you, you where laying next to me when you told me you had always loved me as we fell asleep in bed, legs entwined, my head resting on your chest.

I woke up the next morning to a phone call telling me you had jumped of a bridge. I laughed and told them you couldn't have you where asleep next to me. I looked and saw a note. I still have that note. I cried so much and I never moved on I couldn't.

I only wanted you, with your cute button nose and bright hazel eyes. The freakishly pale skin that we both shared and your laugh, it made me laugh.


I guess what I want to say is I love you so much Gerard Way and I will never stop loving you. Which is why I'm doing this.


You can run away with me anytime you want,

Christy x

this note was found with the letter:

Dear Christy,

I will always love you, but I never deserved you, that's why when ever I'd see you I'd treasure you because I thought you'd leave the second you got the chance. So I know you'll move on and be happy with someone better.

Love your Gerard