FicWad

-Mikey-

"Have you seen Ollie?" Gerard asks, collecting the trash from the cook out we had tonight, which got rained on and brought inside.
"No, I haven't..." I reply. "Did he leave?" I grab a plastic cup and toss it into the trash bag.
"His car's out front." Gerard plops down on the couch, taking a break, and I follow. We both let out a sigh and look over to the hung over Frank on the other couch.
"How long can we leave him there?" I ask.
"I don't know. I was hoping Ollie would take him home. If we can ever find him." Gerard stands up and goes to check out the guest house.
"We gotta take Mckayla home, too." I call after him. "It's a school night!" I glance at the DVD player's clock. It's almost 11pm. By the time we get her home it'll nearly be 4am. Then again she'll get to sleep on the way there. She's probably sleeping upstairs now anyways... Dang. I'm glad I'm done with school. Well... glad that I dropped out of school. Forget missing one day because you were visiting your brother - na, you still gotta get up on two hours of sleep and go through a day of useless learning. Mickie's Aunt is really strict about that stuff. But to be honestly, it's my fault for planning a party for her to meet our friends on a Sunday night. No, it was Gerard's idea. Yeah.. it's all Ger - snore
Frank's sudden snore makes me jump. It wasn't until now I had remembered he was sleeping here. Drool trickles down his mouth more with every loud snore. That's my favorite throw pillow, I growl to myself, sounding like my mother. "Alright Frank, you're alive, I get it, now pipe down." I mutter throw a pillow at him. But he doesn't even open his eyes. Eventually I just decided to go find Mckayla and get ready to leave, with or without Gerard. But she's not in her room...
She's probably hanging out in the band room with Ollie. I laugh to myself as I travel back down the stairs and out to the yard, passing Frank's whistling snore, like the beginning of Hang Em High. Mickie's mom is gonna KILL me if she goes home and takes up drums. I wonder if I can fish out an old, nice, quiet acoustic guitar from my the band closet... I've been meaning to find them and donate them, anyways.
I'm snapped out of my thoughts by Gerard cursing. I roll my eyes. But as I get closer and the cursing continues, I realize, this isn't normal Gerard - he's angry. He is angry like the time he found our uncle beating me with a belt - he's angry like the time the seniors scratched the word 'fag' on his new car because he showed up to school in Ray's jacket - He is going to kill someone. I start to run. Then I hear Ollie cursing back. I run faster. And then I hear...
"Gerard, help!"
It's my sister. And I stop dead in my tracks, frozen, breathing heavily an hearing in slow motion. I hear a loud bang, Followed by more cursing and punches. I snap out of it and charge across to the house. The door's been kicked in. Mickie's cheeks are flushed and she's pale as could be. She's gagging and covering her mouth and stumbling out of the house, tripping over the door. I catch her in mid air and pull her as close to me as humanly possible. She's wearing a men's shirt - I think it's Ollies. I'm sure it is now. It reaks of beer and sweat. Drummers sweat.
She keeps coughing. Gerard is beating Ollie, throwing him against the wall, throwing punches so hard I hear them from outside.
"Mckayla, what just happened?" I yell at her. I didn't notice, but Frank has snapped to and is jogging towards us.
"What's going on?" He asks, shining his phone light to see us.
"He-" Mickie takes gasping breaths for air. In the light I see red marks across her cheeks, and wrists, too. "He just, and I didn't know, and then, and my clothes and -"
"I'm gonna kill him." Frank shakes his head and goes into the house after him.
"No, Frank," I go to follow, but Mickie grabs my arm.
"Mikey! No, you can't leave me here!" Tears are streaming from her eyes now.
"Alright, Mckayla. Come with me." I try to lead her but she's shaking so bad she can hardly walk. I pick her up in my arms and hold her like a toddler on my hip and bring her to the main house and up to the guest room, leaving the guys to deal with Ollie. I set her down on the bed, and give her a second to calm down. "Shh..." I run my fingers through her shoulder length, dyed-red-like-Gerard's-Danger-Day's hair.
"You're alright." I peer into her bright blue eyes. "It's going to be okay. But I need you to calm down -" Saying this does anything calm her down, but makes her hyper ventilate harder.
I get up and pace the room.
Oh no
It's happening again.
NO MIKEY! I tell myself. No, not now, not now, please God, NO!
Can't breath... I can't breath... Oh gosh, I'm going to throw up.
My palms turn into faucets, my eyes water, my knees start to shake, my finger tips tingle.
No, Michael James Way, this is not about you, you're little sister needs you right now.
I push the thoughts of my panic attacks aside. I close my eyes and remember what Ray taught me - if you're panicking it means you aren't breathing. And if you're breathing, you aren't panicking. I let out the breath I've been holding in, and then take in more air. I turn around and walk over to Mickie again. She's looking at me with eyes with so many emotions - hurt, anger, fear, shock, curiosity, worry, concern, but mostly - pain.
"Mckayla," I manage to say. "Tell me exactly what happened."
She explains what happened. She explains the details of my ex drummer raping my baby sister.
There's a reason we Kill All Our Friends.