FicWad

The only girl I'd ever loved
Was born with roses in her eyes
But then they buried her alive
One evening, 1945


A chilly bead of liquid slowly paced down either side of my temples. I felt a fuzzy wetness on my forehead. My elbows felt around the fluffy surface. My knees moved together slightly revealing to me that I was still in my scrubs. My toes felt around my cotton socks as a chill ran around my ankles and down to them. My eyes kept closed in fear that if I opened them, everything wasn't a horrible dream. I didn't want to believe that he really did exist that morning in his parent's home. I didn't want to believe that I saw him with my own eyes. I was almost fully convinced that I had hallucinated the whole thing.

Very carefully, I pried my eyes open to the whirring ceiling fan. I wasn't in my apartment. I scanned the room slowly seeing a large cherry wood dresser and chest. Slowly sitting up, I was laid upon a burgundy duvet. That fuzzy wetness stuck to my head. I reached up peeling a wet wash cloth off of it. I thought I must have gotten sick somehow in Mrs. Way's home. Maybe I had one of those anxiety attacks again, spazzed and fainted. As to why I was in her guest bedroom and how I got there, that was left unsolved. I was alone there, no noise or movement was heard in the hallway. I was safe.

I cursed myself for reacting the way I did, and then I remembered,

"Fuck, work!" I hissed under my breath. Something in the rear of my subconscious instructed me to look out of the window but I never minded it fully. I swung my legs over the side of the bed hunting for my sneakers. I found them on the other side of the bed and quickly strung them on. I had never been late to work or even absent up until then. I checked the night stand and dresser for my phone. It hadn't been there. I was in full-on panic mode. I had no idea what time it was and I knew I was already fired in my boss's eyes.

Frantically searching everywhere in the room, I slowly met myself to the door shut closed. As far as I was concerned, this was the moment of truth. I stood there for about three minutes pondering to myself if he was on the other side of the door, just waiting for me to awake and lay into me like I always imagined he would. I calmed myself and cleared my racing mind. My hand lay softly on the crystal door knob. It slowly turned as I counted to three.

Nothing.

I couldn't muster up the guts to open a damned door! I consoled myself aloud,

"Just open it, Victoria." I grew annoyed with this vulnerable mess that couldn't even open a door. I yanked it open before my conscious even realized I was free. I stood in the doorway just for a moment. Waiting for him to appear in sight so that I could run back in the room, slam the door shut and escape from the window. I hadn't understood how I had this much of an evasive plan in that much time.

I noticed that I hadn't heard a stir, not one noise under my feet. For how old the house was, I didn't hear it creek. I set out skillfully down the hall to the staircase.

I needed my phone.

Approaching the first step, my feet slowly progressed one-by one. I was in the living room again but this time there wasn't any luggage sat by the staircase. I exhaled deeply, thanking whatever God had been there that day and mentally slapping myself for panicking. My eyes shot over to the coffee table sat in the middle of the room, right in front of where I sat before. There, in a gleaming spotlight shone down by the sun, sat my phone unscathed. I grabbed it quickly pressing the side button and unlocking it. My eyes bugged out upon seeing the time. It was two-in the afternoon. My stomach began to gurgle nervously.

I hadn't any missed calls or messages which was odd. I checked my call history, seeing the last outgoing call was the hospital number made a quarter after eight-in the morning. Being preoccupied with my phone, I was unaware of the presence staring right at me.

"Mom used it to call your work," My body jilted in fright as my hands fumbled with the phone. It began to slowly fall but somehow I started to juggle it. Failing miserably, the screen hit the side of the table. My hands drew to my face hiding myself from embarrassment. "I didn't mean to startle you." He assured nervously. My face still cupped in my hands as a security measure. He bends down to retrieve my phone from off of the floor. "That was an ugly drop." He piped an anxious laugh, slowly waving it my way. My right hand peeled itself off of my face, grabbing the phone.

"Thanks," It was barely audible. Why did this have to happen like this. I would have much rather drove to wherever he may have been touring and met him there. Not at his parent's house and definitely not alone with him. That now-or-never attitude began to rise in my chest again. I took a deep breath. I wasn't about to pour everything from six years out to him, but I sure as hell wasn't about to let him getaway.

My other hand cascaded up to the bridge of my nose. Taking another deep breath, I squeezed. My feet were way ahead of me, turning to face him. For the first time in six, almost seven years, we stood face-to-face. My heart pounded out of its cave, growing a fever over those green eyes and pink lips. My head held onto all of those memories of us in his apartment. My brick wall, six years dense, came crashing down like feathers out of a pillow.

He had me.

"Whatever it is you want me to say, I'll say it," He was still silent but his eyes were saying so much. "And I'll mean it. Promise." That thick-skinned girl who lived inside of me, scoffed disgusted at how vulnerable I was and that I let him see me like that. I searched for any sign of emotion.

Nothing.

"Mom tells me you're a nurse now." He was throwing me for a loop. I was going to play along just as he wanted me to.

"Yeah, Pediatric Nurse." I pretended to correct him. The awkward tension in the room eased off. A nostalgic smile played in the corner of his lips.

"Glad you found your niche." He nodded giving me a once-over.

"Happy to see you found yours, as well." I didn't know what he was trying to read off of me then.

"I made you some Green Tea," His hands stiff in his pockets as his head points off in the direction of the kitchen. I quietly hoped it wasn't poisoned. I followed behind him, standing awkwardly at the kitchen table. He drew a mug from behind his back that was previously on the counter. "Have a seat." He instructed with a thoughtful laugh. Keeping my eyes on him, I slowly took a seat. He took his seat directly across from me in front of a steaming mug of coffee. I looked deep into the steam that rose my tea. It wasn't that I didn't trust him, it was that you could never be to sure who you hid a child from.

His child.

I take a sip of my tea as we hold a small staring contest.

"This is perfect," He'd made it the way I loved it. He remembered. "Thank you." That nostalgic grin never chased itself from one corner to another.

"All honey, no sugar and lemon," My laugh made ripples in the chartreuse. After taking another sip, I played with the teabag. He watched me fiercely without any emotion on his face. He'd come prepared to battle, he knew I wouldn't be able to read him. "So let's get down to brass tax, shall we?" I nodded uncomfortably.

"Sure." I spoke carefully. I wasn't sure what type of 'brass tax' he spoke of.

"So what's she like?" Out poured what he'd been wondering for years. "I've heard all about her from Mom and Dad, but I want to hear it from you since you're around her most." I curled my lips in wonder. What exactly did he want to know?

"She's just like you, she looks just like you, she's inquisitive like you are," I could see him imagine her. "She's a wonder, really." He finally gives me a genuine smile.

"Just to be brutally honest, as I don't think I should keep this for much longer," Suspense hung thick in the air. My eyebrows furrowed in confusion. "I knew that day you left what happened, and why you never came home." I take another sip of tea, thoughtfully. He wasn't beating around the bush anymore and he was tired of me doing so for so long.

"How could I have known she was yours, Gerard?" His eyes stared blankly at me. I didn't hear the response readying in his throat. My eyes began to water and that tough girl inside of me begged for it not to happen.

"I didn't care if she was mine or not. I would have been there for you either way," I watched his hands ball up into fist as they sat on the table. I heard a sniffle, but it wasn't coming from me. The solitary tear that lingered in the corner of his eye, finally made an appearance. this only caused me to tear up. That voice cursed me for failing her. "I loved you, Victoria." The passion in his voice killed me. This was the very first time he'd raised his voice at me.

Loved. Meaning, love--past tense.

I didn't say anything. I sat there and whimpered. He had every right to be angry with me and I was giving him the chance voice his opinion. I could tell this had chased around his mind for quite some time.

"I never doubted you, though," I reasoned behind tears. "I couldn't live with myself not fully knowing if she was going to have your eyes." His expression softens some. "I didn't keep her from you on purpose and as a matter of fact, I tried to call you the day she was born but…" I shook my head. That night, he wouldn't pick up. I had gotten a hold of Donna and she let me hear the drunken message he'd left on their answer machine about being in the same club River Phoenix died in.

High.

I watched it fall onto him like a ton of bricks. He wanted the truth, he got the unabridged version. He wiped the tears off of his face with one swipe.

"I didn't believe it, at first." He stares blankly past me.

"We were young, Gerard," His eyes snapped back to me, wanting to reason. "That's really all there is." My voice trails off along with my eyes. "At least you were present financially." It all kind of clicked together. The mystery sender of checks at Christmas, every seventh of June and that time her private school tuition had been taken care of already.

"You're welcome," He tutted taking another sip of coffee. "I hear she plays piano?"

"Yeah, she's got practice until 5 today." He sits back puzzled.

"You do all of this by yourself?" He questions it, perplexity plays in his tone.

"I have help. Your parents have been amazing!" I bowed my head to him. "But other than that, it's all me." He nodded as a hopeful smile drew itself upon his lips. Something about him warmed me in a way I wished we could just go back to his old apartment. I'd let him tear me down like he used to. I grew embarrassed with my own thoughts.

"You've always impressed me." He gave me the smirk. I stared like a puppy in front of a bowl of food.

"I never tried," His smile was contagious. "How do you suppose we tell her we met?" He almost spits out his coffee at this.

"I say, we don't…ever." He laughed. I couldn't imagine trying to explain to her how friends-with-benefits worked.

"Yeah, let's leave that out, for now," I wanted to know more about him. It was as if I was meeting him for the first time all over again. "So what's been up. I hear you're all famous now?" The shy little boy shown in his eyes. He looked away blushing.

"If that's what you like to call it, I've been on MTV before, yes." I was elated for his accomplishments. I always knew he would find his passion in making music with the right people. "I've also been clean and sober for three years now." I'd been for six.

"Congratulations!" He smiled sheepishly. "That's pretty big! You still smoke?" He gave me a slow disappointing nod.

"I'll quit in due time. One thing at a time, you know?" His tone lightened a lot.

"Don't feel bad. I had to be counseled of off smoking when I was carrying Amaya." I saw his eyes light up on the mention of her name.

"Pretty name you picked out." He assured.

"I did my research. It's arabic for 'Night Rain'. The night I was in labor, it rained so hard and as soon as the Nurse handed her to me, it stopped." His eyes filled up with excitement. I couldn't wait for them to meet each other.

"That's beautiful. Thanks for giving her my Grandmother's name as her middle name." I thought to honor for making Gerard the man he was.

"It was a no-brainer. She's an amazing woman." I didn't want to speak of her as past tense even though she passed some time ago. She taught him everything she knew; how to sing, how to draw, best of all she made a gentlemen of him.

"That she is," His eyes commended me. I knew he wasn't completely moved-on from the situation at-hand but it wasn't something we needed to harp on. He was here now and he was finally ready to be a father. "What if she doesn't like me?" His worried childlike eyes pondered. He also gave that nervous laugh to make you think he was kidding.

"That's impossible," I was a school girl in his gaze. "She knows of you, she's ready to get to know you now." I reassured. His eyes lit up again with that excitement. I wasn't sure exactly how it was going to go. Obviously they would have to warm up to each other. It was going to be a little taxing for the two of them to come full-circle, but like Gerard, Amaya had a very willing soul. They shared a very large heart and open mind .

I thought back to earlier and how evading him was my main focus. I could never imagine us casually catching up around his parent's kitchen table, but there we were. Giggling and smiling as if we'd always be friends. There was something in the air that remained untouched. Or maybe I was just feeling nostalgic.

__________________________________________________________________________


My nerves had been on end entering the building. I was excited for her to meet Gerard but nervous for all the of questions she would pose. I didn't want her to think I intentionally hid them from each other but I wanted her to know who her father was above all else.

Amaya's lessons were held in the music room in the basement of her school. She also had practice with her best friend Meghan and a few other kids she had classes with. I walked down the stairs upon being buzzed into the building hearing a cacophony of keys being played. I started down the hallway of twenty classrooms as the music drew nearer. Usually I was the only parent that physically retrieved their child from the lessons. I had met a lot of nannies, chauffeurs and personal assistants this way. Something about that day was different. In the hallway sat a man on one of the wooden benches outside of the classroom.

He was in my seat.

From what I could see, he was busy texting from the time I walked in. My brain was officially disoriented because I had no idea where to sit. there was enough room on the bench but I hated sitting next to complete strangers. I walk past him standing against the wall near it. I pretended to play on my phone catching a few glances here and there. His head wasn't shaved bald but it was a very close shave. The slightest five o'clock shadow grew around the frame of his face and ran lightly across his top lip. He had a long nose that pointed up at the end. He was dressed casually in a leather jacket, indigo washed jeans and a fresh pair of black and red Air Jordan's. My eyebrow lifted at this. None of the parents that I knew from the classes never wore a sneaker in their lives. Not that I was opposed to it, they looked very nice with what he wore.

"There room for you to sit if you like." He turns to me to inquire. His eyes were a dark brown. His facial structure was strong and it went along with his pouted pink lips. His accent wasn't at all New York City. Gazing at him, I'd forgotten to respond.

"No, I'm fine. Just waiting for my daughter." Come to think of it, he was one of those faces I'd known I seen before but only a couple times. "They should be out in a few." He nodded with a polite smile.

"Excuse me if this is an odd question," I enjoyed the way he structured his words. He seemed like he could give a good conversation. "But do you work in Pediatrics at Mount Sinai?" I knew I had seen him before, I just didn't know where.

"I do, actually. How could you tell?" I made a point to draw attention to my scrubs. Sarcasm present in my tone. He laughed lightly.

"I'm an Oncology Resident," Bingo. The Oncology suite wasn't far from the side of the building I was in. "I saw you at the Jude's banquet. You were honored, right?" I felt my cheeks grow warm and my hands go clammy. I hadn't felt like that in a very long time.

"Yes, I was," There were eight other nurses honored that night. "You've got a good memory." I commend.

"Well, I see what you do with those children and it takes a lot of passion going forth with what you do," Was he admiring me from a far? That was the professional notion for stalking. "You ran the Sinai Fair, this year with such ease. It was truly admiring." I hadn't known where any of this was coming from and I wasn't sure if he was saying this just get my number or if he was being sincere. The intelligence in his voice came off both ways. Though, I didn't mind taking a compliment.

"Thanks," He nodded, his smile brilliant and wide. "You have to have the passion for it, especially when you have one of your own." I faintly heard the teacher prepare to dismiss the class.

"I love children but unfortunately I wouldn't know anything about that," This confused me. "I'm here to pick up my nephew." He breathed a laugh seeing me wonder why he'd been there.

"That's nice of you." He remained humble but the smile never left the surface of those lips. Usually I hadn't given half of these men the time when they were trying to talk to me. I didn't have the time and I wasn't about talking to any and everyone who found me attractive.

"My sister works late so I thought it would be thoughtful helping her out with Roman." I wasn't going to hide to the fact that I thought he was absolutely adorable. The door opens wide with all twenty-two children rushing out. At the front of the line was a boy who shared the same eyes as his, but had a dark cut that fell in his eyes.

"Uncle Logan!" He ran up to him with open arms with his backpack bouncing in the air. He wore the school's emblem on his navy blazer that matched his pants. I smiled at the two of them hugging. I seen Amaya exit the room chatting with Meghan on her side and Kristie Vaughn on the other. I was happy Kristie finally warmed up to her.

"Hey mommy!" She spread her arms out wide as I bent down, picked her up and engulfed her in a tight hug.

"Hey baby!" I kissed her on the cheek. She hugged me back just as hard and I didn't ever want to let her go. "How was practice?" I put her down and straightened out her royal blue pea coat.

"Amazing! I learned how to play King of Carrot Flowers and I have a recital coming up in two weeks!" She spoke all in one breath, apparently excited. I seen a hoard of nannies and personal assistants rush down the hallway.

"I'll make sure I let Ms. Donna know and I'll make sure I have off. I'm excited for you!" I had to make a mental note of that, seeing as both of her parents were going to be attending.

"Yay!" She grabbed me into another hug. She turns to Roman, the man's nephew, and gives him a wave. "Can I finish talking to Meghan before her Au Pair comes?" How could I tell her no? Not with those eyes.

"Go ahead, but we have to leave soon." She nods running off to her best friend. Roman, the man's nephew, followed suit behind him. I have his full attention.

"She's beautiful." His voice was very deep but didn't have that scruffy New York accent.

"Thank you," He seemed fairly normal and since we worked in the same hospital, I decided to introduce myself. "My name's Victoria, by the way." I put my hand out in front of me for him to shake.

"Logan," He nods taking my hand. His handshake was firm but it wasn't uncomfortable. I was almost waiting for him to displease me with a sleazy pick up line or unflattering comment. "I couldn't help but overhear, are you a Neutral Milk fan?" I couldn't lie, I was interested.

"Yeah, I've seen them a couple times. She absolutely loves them!" This was the first in-depth conversation I had with a perfect stranger in years. I guess, somewhere along the line, I stopped being a people person.

"I hear they're playing the Knitting Factory this Friday," Was he asking me out on a date? "Doesn't have to be a date, just two people who enjoy music seeing an awesome folk band." It had been a very long time since I was out of the apartment and not working or taking Amaya from school. I wasn't the type of person to hang out anymore. I was so focused on trying to be the best parent Amaya could ask for. I began to have second thoughts on my reservation of his invitation. I remembered Amaya had both parents now.

"Simple enough," I replied, coolly. I was off Friday, thankfully. "What time Friday?" He stood up pulling out his phone again.

Whoa. He was tall.

"I can't pull the information up in here. How about I give you my number, you text my phone and then I can text you back?" I smirked. He was good.

"How about I just give you my number and you text me that information." He was taken aback by my forwardness. I held the nerves back with a smile. He gave me his phone to type it in. I did so and saved my name in his phone. I couldn't believe this was happening. I never went on dates or gave anyone my number. I felt a lot of confidence all of a sudden.

"Thanks," I hand him his phone back. "I guess I'll see you tomorrow?" His eyes held so much hope.

"I work late tomorrow so my Amaya's Grandmother will be picking her up. I'll see you Friday, then." I stuck my hand out once more. He takes it.

"It was a pleasure meeting you, Victoria." I couldn't hide the fireflies in my smile when he spoke my name.

"Pleasure meeting you as well, Logan. Shoot me a text about that show." I sounded so cool. I was finally gaining my confidence back. I walked away towards Amaya, Meghan and her Au Pair.

"Sure will. Have a nice night!" He called after me as I waved back to him. That was so much less awkward than I ever expected it to be.

"Ready?" I was at Amaya's side as she hugged Meghan and bid goodbye to Roman. She took my hand and we began to walk down the hall, up the stairs, and out of the door.


"Are we still going to Ms. Donna's?" We sat in the drive home listening to NPR. I enjoyed their opinionated banter and light topics.

"We're actually going home because I have a surprise for you." Instead of heading back to Gerard's parents, he was coming over after we got home.

"A surprise? What kind of a surprise?" I wish I could just flat out tell her, but it would obviously ruin it.

"A very big surprise," I assured her.

I pulled up in front of the duplex as soon as dusk began to settle in. I couldn't stop thinking about this show on Friday. I had no idea what I would wear as it felt like all I owned were scrubs. I hadn't known if he was picking me up or if I was to meet him. And then it hit me; what would Gerard think?

"What are we having for dinner?" We walked up the flight of stairs that lead to our apartment.

"I don't know, what do you feel like eating?" Usually, she wasn't given the choice but I was much too tired to make her eat whatever I made her. She was picky like that sometimes.

"Chinese!" She insisted. I wasn't about to argue with her as we approached the door.

"Chinese, it is!" Not to be mistaken, I did cook and I knew how to cook thanks to Donna. The days we had takeout were very few and far between.

I turned the lights on to the living room, locking the door behind the both of us and going to the coat closet to hang both of our coats up.

"Do you have homework?" She nodded settling onto the couch, setting her Hello Kitty book bag next to her. She pulled out her school books and began her homework on the coffee table. "Let me know if you need any help." I hadn't finished school. I was two months pregnant when I earned my GED and began Nursing school right after I had her. I was making it a point that she was going to receive her Diploma.

"Okay, Mommy." Her head buried in her books.

I went to the kitchen drawers searching for Chinese takeout menus. Finding one, I ordered enough for the three of us. I went around the house tidying up both bedroom and the living room. Dishes in the kitchen just needed putting away. The apartment was in tip-top shape.

"So what's my surprise, Chinese food?" I giggled as I checked her homework.

"No silly, your surprise isn't Chine food." I had to be honest with her and avoid all awkward questions. "I seen that picture you had under your pillow," Her eyes darted nervously around the room. "I thought this would be a good time for you to know…" Her eyes bugged way out of their sockets. A smile with an unmeasurable wattage.

"My Dad!" She was so hopeful and optimistic. I admired her.

"Yes," I took her hands as she almost shook out of her skin in excitement. I had to let her know the whole truth about Donna. "Amaya, I need to let you know something." Her face tilts puzzled.

"What's that?" I tried to find the right words to say but my overconfident tongue got the best of me.

"Ms. Donna and Mr. Donald, they're your Grandparents." I waited for a response. She seemed unaffected.

"Okay," She shrugged. "But what about my Dad? Is he nice? Does he like music? Where's he from? How old-" I kind of expected this to happen.

Kind of.

"Slow down, he's very nice, he loves music and he's from New Jersey. He's really excited to meet you and I trust that he'll love you just as I do." Her intense expression softens and a small tear cascades down her round face. I embrace her.

I wished I knew who my father was. "He can't wait to meet you, Amaya." I wiped her tears away, showering her in kisses. I never thought that I would love someone so much and to be loved that much back was more than worth it. There was a time in my life where I didn't believe I could be loved by someone else. Basically, because I didn't love myself. Everything changed when I had her. I had to give myself credit for bringing something so beautiful into the world.

I heard the door knock and both of our bodies tensed. We looked to each other as I got up from the couch and looked to the peephole. There, he stood with a blazer and fitting black v-neck. His smile was unbeatable and I could feel his nerves coarse behind the door. Unhooking the chain and turning all of the locks, I opened the door.

"Hey," He gave me a nervous wave back. His smile remained tight and all of his thoughts were legible. His hair was brushed neatly above his eyes but hung perfectly around his ears. "Come in," He stepped all the way in as I shut the door behind them.

I watched them lock eyes as she removed herself from the couch. I took a deep breath seeing as I had to introduce the two. "Amaya, this is Gerard, your father," You could see the likeness like never before now that they were standing face-to-face. "Gerard, this is you daughter." She stuck by me grabbing my hand loosely.

"Hi." He knelt down to her level with a soft smile and starry eyes. She took this as an initiative to run into his arms to see how he hugged back. He straightened out so that he was holding her, cradling her against him. His eyes were closed but they fluttered open with tears present every now and then. She just held on around his neck with her eyes closed, a wide smile across her face and her legs dangling below her.

I couldn't help but tear up myself. I hadn't seen her this happy and I knew this was the best thing I could do for her. The way she lied her head on his shoulder was how I always imagined this happening. Amaya deserved to be loved by the both of us. She deserved to know where her big green eyes came from and her wide smile. And he deserved her.


We sat at the dinner table chowing on Lomein and Sesame Chicken. Amaya was full of questions, all of them appropriate. She wanted to know everything. I was sure he'd already given her his Social Security number and ATM pin. I sat quietly and watch the both of them react.

"Can you draw?" This had to be her millionth question that night.

"Can I draw? Of course I can draw!" He declared. He never took his eyes off of her. He looked to her so endearingly.

"I wanna see!" She urged. The three of our plates were clean so I went around and gathered them putting them into the sink.

"Amaya," I warned.

"It's okay, I have my sketch pad with me." I could already tell what kind of parents we were going to be. His messenger bag lied up against the couch. He got out of the chair. She was rattling herself trying to get out of hers. "I have it," He pulls out her chair. "Always make sure they pull out the chair for you." He instructed. He was probably bursting inside with fatherly wisdom. He lead her over to the couch with his hand in hers. Pulling out his sketch pad, he patted his knee for her to sit on it. His arm reached around her as the other balanced the sketch pad on his knee.

"Draw Mommy!" She demanded. He laughed. He was probably sick and tired of seeing my face by now. He'd done enough drawings for me in his day.

"I've drawn Mommy enough," He giggled. "How about I draw you?" Her head shook in a frenzy as he began to sketch.

I finished up the dishes as I looked to the clock. It was getting late but I didn't want to interrupt what was going on.

"Bed time in ten minutes, Amaya." I called from the kitchen.

"Alright," She was fully focused on Gerard's sketch. He was doing pretty well so far. I could tell she was comfortable around him. She rested her body on his as he skillfully sketched her features with pencil.

"Done!" He exclaimed! She gasped and I heard the paper rip from the spine. She bounded into the kitchen with hurried feet.

"Look," She shoved t up to me. "He's amazing!" The drawing was very spot-on, he even captured the innocence behind her eyes.

"This is very good! How about we stick this on your cork board and then we get ready for bed?" She nods.

"Is Daddy staying?" Before the awkward silence could kick in, I butted in.

"Daddy can tuck you in." She was satisfied with that as she left the room to go change into her pajamas. She left Gerard and I staring at random surfaces.

"So how'd I do?" He gave nervously.

"You did perfect, Gerard," He did the unthinkable and grabbed me into a hug. His scent overpowered me and it almost ant me into a frenzy. I needed to pull back. "She's brilliant, isn't she?"

"She's impossible to not be around," I frowned. I knew he wasn't able to stay. He had a life aside of us. "Thank you, Victoria."

"Thank you," I thought to grab him into a hug. It turned into me wrapping myself around his torso with my head light on his chest, but he held me anyway. "How long are you in town for?"

"Two months," He sighs. "We finish up after Thanksgiving and finish before Christmas." I couldn't imagine what his schedule looked like.

"Well, I can give you her schedule," I swiftly grabbed it off of the fridge. "She has Piano on Tuesday and Thursday and both classes let out at five, and she has to be dropped off before 8AM to be picked up at 3." He took it from my hand examining it with big eyes. "Welcome to parenthood, Gerard." He gave a reassuring nod.

"Daddy, I'm ready!" Amaya jumped out of the hallway dressed fully in her favorite Hello Kitty footed sleeper, hair straight and brushed down to her elbows.

"Alright," He followed her to her bedroom as she got in her bed and shimmied under her covers. I watched at the doorway as he sat on the side of her bed.

"Sing to me." I hadn't known how demanding she was until that day. "Do you know Aeroplane Over The Sea?" Gerard laughs

"Is that what you want me to sing?" She nods. I join her at her bedside and he begins to serenade her softly, word for word. I kiss her forehead.

"Night Amaya, I love you."

"Love you too, Mommy," She was entranced and on her way to slumber.


She'd finally gone to bed when Gerard sneaks out of her room, shutting the door behind him.

"Are you free Friday night?" He turned to me, seemingly exhausted but elated, nonetheless.

"Yeah, why?" He gathered his blazer on his shoulders along with his messenger bag.

"I might need you Friday night to stay with Amaya." An interesting expression played on his grin.

"Are you working?" I shake my head. "Where are you going?" I knew exactly where this was going.

"To a show."

"With who?"

"A friend, Gerard." I retorted. "Your her dad, not mine." I warned. I know he wanted me to be careful and he only cared.

"Fine. I'll do it." I smile as I open the door for him. "It's been good, Victoria,"

"See ya later, Gee." I winked as he waved off. ​