Categories > Celebrities > Fall Out Boy > The Only Hope For Me Is You
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It was just over a week after I joined Pete on tour that the tour was breaking for a week before returning for the second European tour. Tonight was the show in LA. Things with Pete and I seemed to be more stable after we slept together that first night. He did have some periods where he was a little indifferent, but nothing like the first day. We did fight twice about me going back to work and where to look. Pete was begging me to move back to LA since I no longer had a job requiring me to live in New York, but I loved living in New York. Everything about those two fights were still unresolved.
It was around 6 am when the buses pulled up at the venue. Pete had already packed his bags so that he could go home for a few hours before returning to get ready for tonight's show. I helped him load up his bags and mine into the back of a van that took us home. We rode in silence to his new apartment. He had sold his old house in LA right after we got married, so when he came back a month ago, he got an apartment because he was unsure what was going to happen.
"Here it is," Pete announced to me as we walked in. It was kind of plain, but mainly because all of Pete's stuff were in storage still. The apartment was very spacious and luxurious.
"It's pretty nice," I commented honestly. It wasn't as awesome as the New York City apartment we had, but it was better than my first place in LA. I followed Pete into the bedroom and set my bags down on the floor.
"I feel like taking a nap before I go to the stadium. What are you going to do?" He asked me as he began to dress down for a nap.
"I need to go pick up some things that I forgot, so I thought I'd do a little shopping," I lied and he nodded, buying it. I actually had other plans that he was unaware of.
"Okay, well just make sure I'm up within 3 hours," he requested and I nodded. He kissed my cheek and climbed into bed. I grabbed my purse and left.
I sat in the exam room wearing one of those paper gowns and I felt anxious. It always felt like things took forever when you were waiting for an answer that would change your life forever. I'm still not ready to be a mom. I have so much I want to do with my life, like do some more traveling with Pete and get back into my career. I loved working the web site for Cosmo, so I know I want to pursue that somewhere else. Plus, I would be worried that Pete would only want to stay with me because of a baby rather than the fact that he wants to make this work.
The doctor knocked and walked in. "Okay, we got your results. Congratulations Mrs. Wentz, you're going to be a mother." She smiled at me warmly and I felt sick to my stomach. I am going to have a baby, one I am not ready for.
"How... how far along am I?" I needed to know.
"We need to do a sonogram to know for sure. The technician will be here in a minute and then we'll know for sure." She was still smiling. Someone knocked and then came in with the ultrasound equipment. I laid back on the exam table and did as I was instructed. The instrument was rather awkward feeling and uncomfortable, but I was in too much shock to really care.
"Okay, do you see this?" I nodded. "That's the baby. You're about 10 weeks." She smiled at me. "I'll get you some pictures." She said and began to print images of my baby. After she was done getting images and I cleaned up, she turned to me with a smile. "Do you want to hear the heartbeat?"
"I can hear it already?" I asked, in shock.
"Yes," she answered and grabbed a small device. She instructed me to lay back and she lifted the bottom of my shirt and touched the small tool to my stomach. A fast beating sound began to come through the device and I just stared. That's my baby. Mine and Pete's baby. My eyes began to fill with tears. She handed me a tissue and I wiped my eyes. I couldn't believe it. I was going to be a mother.
After the appointment, I drove back to Pete's to wake him. It had been just over 2 hours and I didn't want him to be late. I opted to keep the pregnancy a secret for now. I didn't want it to influence his decision. When I walked up to the front door, I heard talking. I assumed it was the TV until I opened the door quietly and heard Meagan's voice.
"Pete, I'm in love with you." She said and I felt nauseous.
"Meagan, I'm still married." Pete said with frustration in his tone. Still married, as in he wasn't going to stay that way?
"She doesn't want to give you what you want. I can and I want to," she pleaded and I heard Pete sigh. Oh my god! She was trying to steal him from me! I knew it was more than platonic.
"Get the fuck out, you god damn whore," I yelled and stepped into the living room. Meagan's face drained of color. Pete stood up and looked at me. I saw an emotion in his eyes I hadn't seen since I had to choose between him and Gabe.
"Kiley, I'm sorry. I can't help it. You understand." Meagan said, walking towards me.
"If you don't leave right this second, you'll end up in the hospital," I said in a hushed angry tone and she finally took the hint and left hastily, not even saying bye to Pete. I looked up at Pete and he looked fearful of what I would say.
"Kiley," he said, not really sure what else to say.
"So, how long have you been fucking her?" I asked bluntly.
"I'm not. I haven't cheated on you, and I never would." He replied and I believed him.
"But you want to." I stated, but it was meant to be a question, too.
"I don't want to cheat on you," he said and rubbed his face in frustration.
"No, you want her." I said and he looked at me.
"Not more than you." He said and my heart sank. He did have feelings for her. I could lose him to her. I felt really nauseous all of a sudden and I walked into the kitchen and began throwing up into the trash can. "Fuck," Pete said under his breath and he walked over to me and tried to hold my hair back.
"Don't touch me," I cried out between heaves. Pete stepped back and just watched me throw up for a minute before my stomach was empty. He handed me a water bottle and I took it, taking a drink. Since I have another life to worry about, I needed to keep hydrated.
"Where are your shopping bags?" Pete asked, looking for them.
"I didn't go shopping." I said with honesty. Pete looked angry.
"So what were you doing?"
"I was at the doctor. I'm pregnant, Pete." I told him and his face went through a few different emotions. Happiness, shock, sadness, confusion, and then to fear.
"You okay?" He asked me. I had just said a few days earlier that I wasn't ready.
"I honestly was really excited about it, but scared that you would only want me back because of it. But now I know I was right. You don't want me like you used to Pete." Tears were streaming down my cheeks. Pete tried to console me and I backed up, which made him stop.
"Kiley, I love you. Please, I never tried to pursue Meagan and I had no intention to. I want you and I want our baby." He tried to convince me. I shook my head.
"You want our baby, but I don't believe you about wanting me. If you wanted me, then that bitch would not have been here. And you wouldn't have been texting her, especially more than you were texting me." He looked confused. "Yeah, I looked in your phone after I saw the way you two looked at each other."
Pete stood there silent for a minute, knowing that he had messed up. After the doctor told me about the pregnancy, I had decided I was going to give Pete what he wanted. I was going to move back to LA and spend some time just being his wife. I wanted to make him happy, but now I wasn't the issue. His wandering heart was.
"I have to go," I said and walked to his room to grab my bags.
"Where are you going?" Pete asked me, following right behind me.
"Back to New York." I picked up my bags and Pete tried to stop me from leaving the room.
"Don't go, please Kiley." I saw the hurt in his eyes.
"I can't be near you right now. I am beyond hurt right now." I admitted softly and I pushed past him and walked to the front door.
"Please stay in town," he pleaded, still following me. "Get a hotel room, whatever one you want, no matter what cost. Go shopping if you want, fly Amy out if you want, but please, don't leave yet." He begged and I shook my head.
"Now I need some time to think," I repeated the words he had said to me just over a month ago. Pete dropped to his knees in front of me and rested his forehead on my still flat belly before kissing it softly.
"I love you more than anything Kiley. Don't leave me," he pleaded and I took a shaky breath.
"Then prove it." I said back and he looked up at me.
"Tell me what to do, I'll do anything." He said.
"Figure it out," I said and left his apartment. I called a cab and headed to the airport. I needed to get back to New York and figure out my life. I had a baby to think about.
It was just over a week after I joined Pete on tour that the tour was breaking for a week before returning for the second European tour. Tonight was the show in LA. Things with Pete and I seemed to be more stable after we slept together that first night. He did have some periods where he was a little indifferent, but nothing like the first day. We did fight twice about me going back to work and where to look. Pete was begging me to move back to LA since I no longer had a job requiring me to live in New York, but I loved living in New York. Everything about those two fights were still unresolved.
It was around 6 am when the buses pulled up at the venue. Pete had already packed his bags so that he could go home for a few hours before returning to get ready for tonight's show. I helped him load up his bags and mine into the back of a van that took us home. We rode in silence to his new apartment. He had sold his old house in LA right after we got married, so when he came back a month ago, he got an apartment because he was unsure what was going to happen.
"Here it is," Pete announced to me as we walked in. It was kind of plain, but mainly because all of Pete's stuff were in storage still. The apartment was very spacious and luxurious.
"It's pretty nice," I commented honestly. It wasn't as awesome as the New York City apartment we had, but it was better than my first place in LA. I followed Pete into the bedroom and set my bags down on the floor.
"I feel like taking a nap before I go to the stadium. What are you going to do?" He asked me as he began to dress down for a nap.
"I need to go pick up some things that I forgot, so I thought I'd do a little shopping," I lied and he nodded, buying it. I actually had other plans that he was unaware of.
"Okay, well just make sure I'm up within 3 hours," he requested and I nodded. He kissed my cheek and climbed into bed. I grabbed my purse and left.
I sat in the exam room wearing one of those paper gowns and I felt anxious. It always felt like things took forever when you were waiting for an answer that would change your life forever. I'm still not ready to be a mom. I have so much I want to do with my life, like do some more traveling with Pete and get back into my career. I loved working the web site for Cosmo, so I know I want to pursue that somewhere else. Plus, I would be worried that Pete would only want to stay with me because of a baby rather than the fact that he wants to make this work.
The doctor knocked and walked in. "Okay, we got your results. Congratulations Mrs. Wentz, you're going to be a mother." She smiled at me warmly and I felt sick to my stomach. I am going to have a baby, one I am not ready for.
"How... how far along am I?" I needed to know.
"We need to do a sonogram to know for sure. The technician will be here in a minute and then we'll know for sure." She was still smiling. Someone knocked and then came in with the ultrasound equipment. I laid back on the exam table and did as I was instructed. The instrument was rather awkward feeling and uncomfortable, but I was in too much shock to really care.
"Okay, do you see this?" I nodded. "That's the baby. You're about 10 weeks." She smiled at me. "I'll get you some pictures." She said and began to print images of my baby. After she was done getting images and I cleaned up, she turned to me with a smile. "Do you want to hear the heartbeat?"
"I can hear it already?" I asked, in shock.
"Yes," she answered and grabbed a small device. She instructed me to lay back and she lifted the bottom of my shirt and touched the small tool to my stomach. A fast beating sound began to come through the device and I just stared. That's my baby. Mine and Pete's baby. My eyes began to fill with tears. She handed me a tissue and I wiped my eyes. I couldn't believe it. I was going to be a mother.
After the appointment, I drove back to Pete's to wake him. It had been just over 2 hours and I didn't want him to be late. I opted to keep the pregnancy a secret for now. I didn't want it to influence his decision. When I walked up to the front door, I heard talking. I assumed it was the TV until I opened the door quietly and heard Meagan's voice.
"Pete, I'm in love with you." She said and I felt nauseous.
"Meagan, I'm still married." Pete said with frustration in his tone. Still married, as in he wasn't going to stay that way?
"She doesn't want to give you what you want. I can and I want to," she pleaded and I heard Pete sigh. Oh my god! She was trying to steal him from me! I knew it was more than platonic.
"Get the fuck out, you god damn whore," I yelled and stepped into the living room. Meagan's face drained of color. Pete stood up and looked at me. I saw an emotion in his eyes I hadn't seen since I had to choose between him and Gabe.
"Kiley, I'm sorry. I can't help it. You understand." Meagan said, walking towards me.
"If you don't leave right this second, you'll end up in the hospital," I said in a hushed angry tone and she finally took the hint and left hastily, not even saying bye to Pete. I looked up at Pete and he looked fearful of what I would say.
"Kiley," he said, not really sure what else to say.
"So, how long have you been fucking her?" I asked bluntly.
"I'm not. I haven't cheated on you, and I never would." He replied and I believed him.
"But you want to." I stated, but it was meant to be a question, too.
"I don't want to cheat on you," he said and rubbed his face in frustration.
"No, you want her." I said and he looked at me.
"Not more than you." He said and my heart sank. He did have feelings for her. I could lose him to her. I felt really nauseous all of a sudden and I walked into the kitchen and began throwing up into the trash can. "Fuck," Pete said under his breath and he walked over to me and tried to hold my hair back.
"Don't touch me," I cried out between heaves. Pete stepped back and just watched me throw up for a minute before my stomach was empty. He handed me a water bottle and I took it, taking a drink. Since I have another life to worry about, I needed to keep hydrated.
"Where are your shopping bags?" Pete asked, looking for them.
"I didn't go shopping." I said with honesty. Pete looked angry.
"So what were you doing?"
"I was at the doctor. I'm pregnant, Pete." I told him and his face went through a few different emotions. Happiness, shock, sadness, confusion, and then to fear.
"You okay?" He asked me. I had just said a few days earlier that I wasn't ready.
"I honestly was really excited about it, but scared that you would only want me back because of it. But now I know I was right. You don't want me like you used to Pete." Tears were streaming down my cheeks. Pete tried to console me and I backed up, which made him stop.
"Kiley, I love you. Please, I never tried to pursue Meagan and I had no intention to. I want you and I want our baby." He tried to convince me. I shook my head.
"You want our baby, but I don't believe you about wanting me. If you wanted me, then that bitch would not have been here. And you wouldn't have been texting her, especially more than you were texting me." He looked confused. "Yeah, I looked in your phone after I saw the way you two looked at each other."
Pete stood there silent for a minute, knowing that he had messed up. After the doctor told me about the pregnancy, I had decided I was going to give Pete what he wanted. I was going to move back to LA and spend some time just being his wife. I wanted to make him happy, but now I wasn't the issue. His wandering heart was.
"I have to go," I said and walked to his room to grab my bags.
"Where are you going?" Pete asked me, following right behind me.
"Back to New York." I picked up my bags and Pete tried to stop me from leaving the room.
"Don't go, please Kiley." I saw the hurt in his eyes.
"I can't be near you right now. I am beyond hurt right now." I admitted softly and I pushed past him and walked to the front door.
"Please stay in town," he pleaded, still following me. "Get a hotel room, whatever one you want, no matter what cost. Go shopping if you want, fly Amy out if you want, but please, don't leave yet." He begged and I shook my head.
"Now I need some time to think," I repeated the words he had said to me just over a month ago. Pete dropped to his knees in front of me and rested his forehead on my still flat belly before kissing it softly.
"I love you more than anything Kiley. Don't leave me," he pleaded and I took a shaky breath.
"Then prove it." I said back and he looked up at me.
"Tell me what to do, I'll do anything." He said.
"Figure it out," I said and left his apartment. I called a cab and headed to the airport. I needed to get back to New York and figure out my life. I had a baby to think about.
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