Categories > Anime/Manga > Naruto > Eroninja
Chapter 48: Trouble in Sand and The Pack: Part II
Naruto is given a scroll containing the secrets of making women fall for him, a scroll he uses at first on the women around him but soon on the shinobi world as a whole, giving birth to the Eroninja
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Reviews
Eroninja
(#) speedingticket280 2013-11-25
I actually would've preferred Aeris over Tifa but, what can I do.
It's mostly because I can't separate Aeris, in this story, from Final Fantasy. Kiba, in my mind, just doesn't deserve "that" Aeris. Her being the way she is, she'd would be supportive of Naruto's dream (while hesitant about the sexual part) in that he's trying to bring peace and he uses the least amount of physical force possible.
Tifa and Yuffie are both fighters and that aren't too hard to imagine being with Kiba, but Aeris (such a sad face I wear).
Anyhow. So, Karura is alive (at least I'm sure that's who you revealed at the end). Since Kiba is the one with the second Harem, does this mean that Naruto gets another MILF or is she going to return to the land of the dead. Or maybe she just stays with her son but doesn't enter a sexual relationship with anyone.
Mikoto moving closer to joining harem it seems. Nice. Kurenai is placed on the path towards that same goal whether she knows it or not. Very nice. Kushina is slowly finding it harder to not give into her desires for Naruto. So very nice.
Sweet chapter, and here's hoping that Aeris doesn't join Kiba after all though that's hopeless.
Eroninja
(#) Kyukon 2013-11-25
Hell yeah, Tifa enters the harem! That's what I was talking about.
Good going with the development of Mikoto, Kushina, and Kurenai. MILF FTW!
Though I have to say the twist at the end is kinda sad, depressing, and whatever words that are synonymous to to that.
Hopefully this arc will end at the next chapter.Eroninja
(#) FicWader 2013-11-25
Another great chapter.
Even though I dont care about Tifa much and it doesnt matter to me whether or not she joins harem I liked this chapter quite a bit as finally we see who is the one causing new trouble.
The only thing that I am confused about is the statement of Daimyos official... how could daimyo possibly demand Gaaras execution just for failure to protect his vassal? It doesnt make sense as hidden villages are supposed to be the bulk of military force for every country and kage is almost equal to daimyo.
I dont think there would be much of a standing army of 10s of thousands as what would daimyo keep hidden village running for? He would solve all his problems with army, no need to pay double and even more when missions come up.
And hidden village is the only thing protecting the country as I doubt daimyos have more developed spy network than ninjas... so the ones deciding on assassinations and sabotages of vital targets are kages and strategists in hidden villages.
So I think the only thing Daimyo would be able to do is demand that he step down and be judged by Sunas military laws. As baseless execution would be exactly what Gaara had supposedly done.
Daimyo would also have to step carefuly as he wouldnt want them to rebel. That would bring repercussions from other countries, sure, but they have a reason to be on edge with him with the low funding after the war.
I may have missed some of your points as I have come from different angle maybe. I would like to be corrected if thats the case.Author's response
Well to hopefully clear things up for you in regards to the politics of Naruto let me explain. Before the founding of the great villages I imagine that the Daimyo would have had large standing armies. Now, after the founding while I could see these forces being scaled back I do not believe that they would completely get ride of them. Because if the shinobi ever did turn against them then who would they call on to defend them.
With that said, it seems to me that the Naruto world is much like how Feudal japan was. With the Daimyo serving the role as the emperor and the Kage serving the role of the Shogun. Now while in Japan the emperor might have simply been a figure head, in the Naruto world they seem to wield considerable power. While it may have been a movie and not necessarily cannon. In Naruto: Inheritors of the Will of Fire. After Haruko declares his intentions to start a 4th Shinobi War, Tsunade is called before the Fire Daimyo and told to solve the problem or he'd be forced to destroy Konoha. First this would point out that he has considerable forces to do such that, and second since Tsunade didn't balk she must believe he could as well.
Yet, Canon has described the Kage and Daimyo as two equal and distinct individuals. But to me this doesn't neccessarily mean that the Daimyo believe this themselves. This would be why they can order a Kage around, since as a good leader they would wish to take a path to protect their people because if they do lose the Daimyo's support the village could be destroyed or displaced.Eroninja
(#) LeafRanger5 2013-11-25
So Gaara's own mom did this? Wow that's really messed up.
And uughh, why are all the civilan nobles and daimyo's assholes in your fanfic? I really hope you remedy/end this problem next chapter, cuz I really don't think I can sit through another chapter of asshole bullshit like that fucking prick at the end of this chapter.
sighs Honestly, I miss the old days of your fanfic where it was just Naruto seducing women. I loved every chapter. now though, I honestly both like and dislike your chapters, because you do constantly have problems pop up that piss me off.Eroninja
(#) TheWickedTruth89 2013-11-25
Great chapter, I like the similarities to Izumo in and that Tifa ended up with Naruto, the ending was intriguing as well. Can't wait for more.Eroninja
(#) n0mster 2013-11-25
As always, it's fantastic to see a new chapter, anyway intriguing plot developments and character development. When I first saw the scene with Tifa and the revealing of her lingering thoughts about Naruto and her role in his childhood attack, it had raised my hopes that she would join his harem and I was definitely glad to see that this hope was realised. It was interesting to see how Naruto was able to relieve her guilt, pique her interest and finally reel her in.
On another note, it's always great to see an elaboration of your world's background, and the history behind the Sarutobi clan's emergence was a pretty interesting addition to the fleshing out of the Naruto-verse. The clans are an integral portion of the world and their mechanics and functioning will continue to be an important component in Naruto's plans.
In addition, I liked how each of your characters appears to be progressing, in the case of Yakumo, having her ponder and stumble upon how to raise the Kurama clan's usefulness and status in one fell swoop, by taking her clan's roots and expanding them in a direction never before taken or realised. It certainly made sense to take advantage of her clan's ability in genjutsu and bypass its members limited ability in the art of illusion by specialising in the countering of their use. While a limited number of its members hold the potential and ability to practice genjutsu at a sufficiently high level, a considerably larger number would be sufficiently talented to counteract its effects, made even more effective by the knowledge and skills held by the Kurama clan.
The highlight of this chapter (beyond the induction of Tifa into Naruto's harem, and the unveiling of her character and dreams) was of course the thickening of the plot regarding Councillor Joseki's death and Gaara's subsequent framing. I have to admit that I was blindsided by the true culprit of the matter, but rather than disappointed, I was enthralled by the possibilities. I had hoped that Shukaku would take the appearance or at least draw inspiration from the appearance of Gaara's mother since I wanted her in Naruto's harem in some way. And her appearance in this chapter, and in a form that was not unprecedented (after all there have been other Kunoichi resurrected for nefarious means), certainly intrigued me. After all, Naruto has already seduced at least one MILF and is well on the way to charming others.(That reminds me, I really liked the scene regarding Mikoto and her plea for forgiveness. I had been wondering about that plot arc and it was nice to see the culmination of it. Even nicer to see was Mikoto's (and Kushina's) increasingly favourable response to Naruto and it definitely provided hope that she too will soon succumb to Naruto's charms)
It was certainly due for Kabuto to make a reappearance and for his plans to once more rear their ugly heads, so it was interesting to see that he was the one responsible for the death of Joseki and his allies along with the subsequent framing of Gaara. I have a nagging feeling that Kabuto is in fact working alongside the Daimyo factions, since his and their plans seem awfully fortuitous in timing to be just sheer coincidence. Nonetheless, this continues to show that the various Daimyos are developing into a credible threat to Naruto's dreams, and that Naruto will soon have to take steps to eliminating or disarming that threat.
Anyway, the foreshadowing the previous chapter quickly became apparent with Gaara's framing and his lack of alibi, and I have to admit that Sari's attitude toward her and Gaara's relationship was a little disappointing. For her to so quickly (well relatively quickly) think of giving up on their relationship because of their lack of physical intimacy (which is rather justified in Gaara's case due to his inexperience and history of 'backstabbing'), especially after 'bagging' the most eligible bachelor of Suna and one of its most loyal ninja. Well, it wasn't a credit to her character. While it was understandable to have doubts and worries in a relationship, she should have known that a jinchuuriki would come with at least some emotional baggage, given their usually morose history, so her musings of leaving Gaara were rather saddening. Now, hopefully this framing incident will provide both her and Gaara a suitably large impetus to their relationship, one which will finally allow them to progress further and satisfy both of their needs and wants.
On another note, I loved the fact that many Suna Kunoichi just can't seem to get Naruto out of their minds, even if they don't know his true identity, it definitely sets up some potential for Naruto to insert more influence into his village's greatest ally, and it's evident that he certainly needs the help with the developments this chapter.
The introduction of Senjumaru Shutara was really captivating, the talk of Suna's puppetry had actually raised my musings about the lack of eligible female puppeteers in the Naruto-verse (and in Naruto's harem) so her appearance came as a welcome surprise. She's certainly an apt choice for an extremely powerful puppeteer given what's been shown of her character in Bleach so far, and display of artificial arms already provides a lot of potential for her battle prowess and abilities in the future. Unfortunately, it seems like she'll be a foe at present, though we all know Naruto's track record for converting his opponents into allies (and more).
Anyway, really enjoyed your latest chapter and I'm definitely looking forward to your next.Eroninja
(#) chachu 2013-11-25
Knew it was an edo tensei...didn't suspect the culprit though.
Glad that Tifa is With Naruto, as it makes sense as he does sorta look like Cloud.
Really do love the politics that you put into this story, something that is sorely lacking in the manga...gives the world a feeling of depth.
Keep up the good work.Eroninja
(#) Joki-Boi 2013-11-25
Ah, another great chapter from our favorite Sage, and welcome back to fanfiction . net. I read this chapter and the last chapter in one go (I didn't notice that you updated until now).
Though I can see something: that you are nearing "The Point." That point where you can either soar into the pantheon of fanfiction greatness for all eternity, or where it levels and inevitably falls. Now I'm a fan, and will always be a fan (yours is the only story that I've resolved to read all the way even if it becomes crap, which it won't), but I feel the need to point this out.
First of all, there's you choice as Kiba as the second harem guy. Now I have no problem myself, but some fans might.
Naruto fans have somehow gotten it into their heads that Kiba is an incredibly perverted jackass with next to no morals who wants to be the "alpha" and thinks that Hinata belongs to him. I see no evidence supporting such in canon, but a disturbingly large amount of fans do. I call that "Fandumb."
I have no problem with your Kiba, and I really am interested to see where this goes. But also using FF characters, especially ones as loved as those from FFVII with Kiba could turn some potential fans away (not me though), though I doubt it as if they got to this point they'd be rather invested (you're near the 1 mil point! Magnificent!).
Also, I've noticed that you're subtly beginning to fall into the rut that most harem writers experience: losing track of characters. With the ridiculously large amount of females in Naruto's harem I can't blame you, but still. Example: When was the last time that we saw Fubuki? I forgot that she even existed for a while, and while she is a minor character it still serves to make my point. Of course, I could just be making premature assumptions, but only time will tell.
I'm also not particularly a fan of "Romancing the Widow" in Kurenai's case. So few people keep Asuma alive, and so I was pleased when you had Hidan die before the Bounty Station incident. And then you had Pein kill him off. While it did add drama, I feel that having Kurenai with Naruto would be a bit too far. I actually feel as if it'd be better if Kurenai did commit suicide, because it would help the development, perhaps, of her team, Shikamaru, Yuugao, Anko and others, but also because no author really shows the aftereffects of Pein's attack, 'cuz everybody used the Rinne Tensei asspull move. Though I'm glad that you didn't use said asspull. Also, she wanted to have a child with Asuma, so having an ultimatum with Naruto where she wouldn't be able to also troubles me.
On a side note, congratulations for getting a mention on TV Tropes. It doesn't say your story or name in particular, but near the bottom of the fanfic folder of the "Dying Moment of Awesome" page it has your Jiraiya's death. It doesn't mention your story in particular, but it does display the same exact situation. This story totally deserves a TV Tropes page to itself.
All in all, though, your story is a masterpiece. I'm just a reader, you're the author, go about it however you want, I'll keep following all the way.
See ya next time.Eroninja
(#) Nomugendai 2013-11-25
I couldn't help but note that you referred to Kukaku as the Five-tails. Isn't she the Four-tails? And the Five-tails is Harribel yes?
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