Categories > Celebrities > Metallica > Lion's Share
1980
Maria was teaching herself how to play guitar. Virtuosity and technical prowess weren't important things in the music the two girls wanted to make, so she roughly grabbed the basic theory and then worked around it to find the sounds she desired. Cathy had received some elementary piano training from her father, but she still had to become familiar with the electronic devices.
Their approach to music was very instinctive. “We don't have to follow any standard pattern, nor prepackaged formulae. We have the freedom to space wherever we want.” Cathy said, and Maria agreed wholeheartedly. The girls played for hours in their apartment; they lived in a noisy building, so nobody cared about the music (but you'd better be quiet at night, unless you wanted the other residents to knock at your door with baseball bats and frying pans).
At first, Cathy and Maria didn't have a clear idea of what they were doing; they sure had their influences in mind, but didn't plan to copy or sound similar to anyone else. Sometimes, it felt like they were proceeding at random. It was frustrating and demoralizing, but over the course of time, the girls developed a distinctive sound of their own.
Soon the girls matured the idea to look for other members; a drummer was needed, a singer too, and maybe a bassist. They hung around other bands after concerts and at parties, where they would meet lots of people willing to join a band, but nobody seemed to be a suitable candidate. They also discovered a lot of new groups that would come to contribute shaping their music taste; mainly British groups like Throbbing Gristle, Cabaret Voltaire and This Heat.
Cathy and Maria stumbled across their future drummer the day they went to a meeting hosted by Colab, a collective of underground artists from different disciplines. There was a band playing live music and some people were dancing to it; the musicians were trying to play some sloppy punk songs, but they sounded trite and derivative. The drummer was the only one doing something impressive.
“Look at that guy.” Said Cathy. “Damn, he's got the rhythm.”
“He sounds very... tribal.” replied Maria. “I like it.”
“I want to talk to him. Maybe we've finally found our man.”
Cathy watched the band closely, while Maria decided to grab a drink and sit on an armchair by herself, hoping not to get bothered. She was out of luck, as a man sat down on the near chair with the intention to have a chat.
Maria listened to him and clumsily tried to hold the conversation; in spite of Cathy's influence, she was still socially impaired in many ways. The man, whose name was Richard, was quite a smooth talker; he claimed to be an independent filmmaker who had just finished his second film.
“It's an art porn movie I made to challenge the oppressive mores of today's society.” he said. “I'm sure you understand it's still a long way before we free ourselves from sexual guilt.”
“Well, yes, lots of people are ashamed of their own sexual drive...”
“Exactly! Especially women, don't you think? They should let themselves go more easily.” said Richard, stroking Maria's knee.
“That... depends. Sex can be handled stupidly; I've seen people using it as some kind of exercise in self hatred. It's not like fucking is the cure to every problem of life.” she replied, moving her leg away from his touch.
Richard launched into a long rant about the liberating power of sex, the legacy of puritanism, the importance of getting out of one's comfort zone and explore new possibilities and even feminist sexual empowerment. He was good with words; he made very good points, his arguments were reasonable and his speech was solid. And Maria could see it for what it was: a tactic to get her do what he wanted. He was exploiting a good cause for his petty ends.
Be liberated and enjoy the kind of sex I like, was his ultimate aim. A modern woman has no taboos, she's free to explore everything; only prudes have boundaries. Only prudes don't indulge in my fantasies, was his actual point. Don't bother to discover what you really want, all you have to do is fit into my preferences.
Did she really look so weak, so defenceless and vulnerable, she wondered, that this idiot thought he could manipulate her to go along with his wishes, and make her forget her owns? Did people think she was someone who let the others walk all over herself, when they looked at her?
The problem wasn't that Richard wanted to have sex with her but that he saw her as a commodity to be used, and that really pissed her off to no end.
She was shy, awkward and really not self assured, but she was nobody's doormat, especially to some manipulative asshole looking for a dumb chick with enough a low self-esteem to grovel before his feet. It was time to show the man her mean streak.
“So, let's say.” Maria interrupted Richard. “That I'm willing to comply with your desires. Will you do the same with mine?”
“Well, the key to a healthy sexuality...”
“Let's say I want to strap on a dildo and sodomize you.” she said with a grin, “Will you let me?”
Richard grimaced. “It's not something I...”
“Oh, but the prostate is such a huge pleasure point for men. Why don't you want to try? Are you a prude, Richard?”
“I'm not! I just don't...”
“I'm sure you're just repressed because of this American puritan society. But don't worry, I'll show you how good it can be.”
“You're not going to do shit!” Richard said. He was getting visibly upset.
“Silly boy, you just don't know any better. But I do. And you're going to like it. Whether you want it or not.”
Richard jumped to his feet, absolutely livid. “Are you nuts, bitch? What the fuck is wrong with you?” he shouted.
Maria looked at him in contempt. “Maybe you are scared, maybe you tried it and just didn't like it, maybe you're afraid it would turn you gay. Maybe you're simply not interested. But whatever your reason is, it's not up to me to decide, only to you. And I have no right to force, cajole or extort anything more than you're willing to give.” Richard shut up and stared at her bewildered. “Did you think I wouldn't notice your pathetic attempt to manipulate me? You don't give a shit about sexual liberation, you just want me to like what you like and accommodate your every desire.”
With those words, Maria walked away from Richard and rejoined Cathy; the brief concert was already over and her friend was talking animatedly with the drummer.
“Maria, here you are. This is Steve, he just accepted to rehearse with us and see if we work well as a group.” said Cathy. “Steve, this is Maria, our guitarist.”
“Hey girl.” Steve greeted her. He was a big guy with a mellow expression on his face.
“Nice to meet you.”
“We're going to Steve's house tomorrow. He has a garage! Isn't it fantastic?” exclaimed Cathy. Maria could swear that her eyes were literally shining. She smiled at the young woman's enthusiasm and nodded. “Yes, it really is.”
Steve had invited to the rehearsal a friend named Ron, a skinny guy who liked the idea of singing in a band and wanted to try for the group, so Cathy and Maria decided to give him a chance too. The jamming was almost a revelation, the four of them really clicked together; they were on the same wavelength, musically speaking, and instinctively understood each other.
Steve's personal and unique drumming style was so interesting that Cathy and Maria would write or rearrange songs after it. In their minds, every instrument was equally important and none had to lead or prevail on the others, they all had to work together in synergy.
Ron, on his part, had an ungraceful, untamed and gutsy vocal style. Sometimes he would sound like a schizophrenic trying to run away from a mental asylum, which the two girls absolutely loved. Ron could sing the lyrics written by Cathy and Maria to perfection at first try, without the need of any suggestions; he could feel the words the same way the girls did.
The final lineup was together at last.
Maria was teaching herself how to play guitar. Virtuosity and technical prowess weren't important things in the music the two girls wanted to make, so she roughly grabbed the basic theory and then worked around it to find the sounds she desired. Cathy had received some elementary piano training from her father, but she still had to become familiar with the electronic devices.
Their approach to music was very instinctive. “We don't have to follow any standard pattern, nor prepackaged formulae. We have the freedom to space wherever we want.” Cathy said, and Maria agreed wholeheartedly. The girls played for hours in their apartment; they lived in a noisy building, so nobody cared about the music (but you'd better be quiet at night, unless you wanted the other residents to knock at your door with baseball bats and frying pans).
At first, Cathy and Maria didn't have a clear idea of what they were doing; they sure had their influences in mind, but didn't plan to copy or sound similar to anyone else. Sometimes, it felt like they were proceeding at random. It was frustrating and demoralizing, but over the course of time, the girls developed a distinctive sound of their own.
Soon the girls matured the idea to look for other members; a drummer was needed, a singer too, and maybe a bassist. They hung around other bands after concerts and at parties, where they would meet lots of people willing to join a band, but nobody seemed to be a suitable candidate. They also discovered a lot of new groups that would come to contribute shaping their music taste; mainly British groups like Throbbing Gristle, Cabaret Voltaire and This Heat.
Cathy and Maria stumbled across their future drummer the day they went to a meeting hosted by Colab, a collective of underground artists from different disciplines. There was a band playing live music and some people were dancing to it; the musicians were trying to play some sloppy punk songs, but they sounded trite and derivative. The drummer was the only one doing something impressive.
“Look at that guy.” Said Cathy. “Damn, he's got the rhythm.”
“He sounds very... tribal.” replied Maria. “I like it.”
“I want to talk to him. Maybe we've finally found our man.”
Cathy watched the band closely, while Maria decided to grab a drink and sit on an armchair by herself, hoping not to get bothered. She was out of luck, as a man sat down on the near chair with the intention to have a chat.
Maria listened to him and clumsily tried to hold the conversation; in spite of Cathy's influence, she was still socially impaired in many ways. The man, whose name was Richard, was quite a smooth talker; he claimed to be an independent filmmaker who had just finished his second film.
“It's an art porn movie I made to challenge the oppressive mores of today's society.” he said. “I'm sure you understand it's still a long way before we free ourselves from sexual guilt.”
“Well, yes, lots of people are ashamed of their own sexual drive...”
“Exactly! Especially women, don't you think? They should let themselves go more easily.” said Richard, stroking Maria's knee.
“That... depends. Sex can be handled stupidly; I've seen people using it as some kind of exercise in self hatred. It's not like fucking is the cure to every problem of life.” she replied, moving her leg away from his touch.
Richard launched into a long rant about the liberating power of sex, the legacy of puritanism, the importance of getting out of one's comfort zone and explore new possibilities and even feminist sexual empowerment. He was good with words; he made very good points, his arguments were reasonable and his speech was solid. And Maria could see it for what it was: a tactic to get her do what he wanted. He was exploiting a good cause for his petty ends.
Be liberated and enjoy the kind of sex I like, was his ultimate aim. A modern woman has no taboos, she's free to explore everything; only prudes have boundaries. Only prudes don't indulge in my fantasies, was his actual point. Don't bother to discover what you really want, all you have to do is fit into my preferences.
Did she really look so weak, so defenceless and vulnerable, she wondered, that this idiot thought he could manipulate her to go along with his wishes, and make her forget her owns? Did people think she was someone who let the others walk all over herself, when they looked at her?
The problem wasn't that Richard wanted to have sex with her but that he saw her as a commodity to be used, and that really pissed her off to no end.
She was shy, awkward and really not self assured, but she was nobody's doormat, especially to some manipulative asshole looking for a dumb chick with enough a low self-esteem to grovel before his feet. It was time to show the man her mean streak.
“So, let's say.” Maria interrupted Richard. “That I'm willing to comply with your desires. Will you do the same with mine?”
“Well, the key to a healthy sexuality...”
“Let's say I want to strap on a dildo and sodomize you.” she said with a grin, “Will you let me?”
Richard grimaced. “It's not something I...”
“Oh, but the prostate is such a huge pleasure point for men. Why don't you want to try? Are you a prude, Richard?”
“I'm not! I just don't...”
“I'm sure you're just repressed because of this American puritan society. But don't worry, I'll show you how good it can be.”
“You're not going to do shit!” Richard said. He was getting visibly upset.
“Silly boy, you just don't know any better. But I do. And you're going to like it. Whether you want it or not.”
Richard jumped to his feet, absolutely livid. “Are you nuts, bitch? What the fuck is wrong with you?” he shouted.
Maria looked at him in contempt. “Maybe you are scared, maybe you tried it and just didn't like it, maybe you're afraid it would turn you gay. Maybe you're simply not interested. But whatever your reason is, it's not up to me to decide, only to you. And I have no right to force, cajole or extort anything more than you're willing to give.” Richard shut up and stared at her bewildered. “Did you think I wouldn't notice your pathetic attempt to manipulate me? You don't give a shit about sexual liberation, you just want me to like what you like and accommodate your every desire.”
With those words, Maria walked away from Richard and rejoined Cathy; the brief concert was already over and her friend was talking animatedly with the drummer.
“Maria, here you are. This is Steve, he just accepted to rehearse with us and see if we work well as a group.” said Cathy. “Steve, this is Maria, our guitarist.”
“Hey girl.” Steve greeted her. He was a big guy with a mellow expression on his face.
“Nice to meet you.”
“We're going to Steve's house tomorrow. He has a garage! Isn't it fantastic?” exclaimed Cathy. Maria could swear that her eyes were literally shining. She smiled at the young woman's enthusiasm and nodded. “Yes, it really is.”
Steve had invited to the rehearsal a friend named Ron, a skinny guy who liked the idea of singing in a band and wanted to try for the group, so Cathy and Maria decided to give him a chance too. The jamming was almost a revelation, the four of them really clicked together; they were on the same wavelength, musically speaking, and instinctively understood each other.
Steve's personal and unique drumming style was so interesting that Cathy and Maria would write or rearrange songs after it. In their minds, every instrument was equally important and none had to lead or prevail on the others, they all had to work together in synergy.
Ron, on his part, had an ungraceful, untamed and gutsy vocal style. Sometimes he would sound like a schizophrenic trying to run away from a mental asylum, which the two girls absolutely loved. Ron could sing the lyrics written by Cathy and Maria to perfection at first try, without the need of any suggestions; he could feel the words the same way the girls did.
The final lineup was together at last.
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