Categories > Anime/Manga > Pokemon

Ash's Retarded Adventure Vol. 4

by TheFictor 0 reviews

Category: Pokemon - Rating: PG-13 - Genres: Humor - Warnings: [V] - Published: 2014-10-09 - 425 words - Complete

Ash continued sliding own the hill. It had been six hours he was sliding.
He was falling asleep when he saw a group of sharp rocks in the distance in front of him.
He tried turning but he wouldn't move. He slid right over the razor sharp rocks and they sliced his ballsack in two, ripping open his stitches.

He started tumbling down the hill, being slathered in his own blood. When he hit the bottom of the mountain,there was a rock right where his head hit.
His head smashed all over it, and blood splattered out of his nose.
He passed out.

Wen he woke up, there was a weird looking man standing over him.
"Have a nice fall?" He said.

"Shut up you slut-OW!" He screamed as he talked.

"Yup, I've seen this before!" He walked over to something sitting in a pool of blood.
He picked it up and showed it to him.
"What is that?" Ash asked.

"What's this? Why, it's your nose!"

"WHAT! MY NOSE FELL OFF?!" He started patting his face, only to be welcomed by a burning pain in his face.
"Yup. Did you know your'e naked?"

"Yes you slut. I need to find clothes."

"Ain't no clothes out here!"

"Then why do you have clothes?"

"I made them."

"How am I supposed to make clothes?"

"With plants of course."
The old man looked at his nose, pulled out some salt, and ate his nose.
"What the heck you slut!"

"What? Don't wanna waste food down here, it might be the only meal you get for a while."

"Teach me how to survive."
The old man gave ash lessons on how to make clothes out of leaves and crap.
He taught him how to drink his pee when he was thirsty and how to control his weak bladder and stomach.
He also taught him how to swing from branches like a slut monkey.

"You are ready."

"Ok you slut whore."

"One more thing-whats your name?"

"Ash is my name you slut."

"Ok Ass."

"No its Ash not Ass."

"Mmkay Ass."

"No its Ash! You slut monkey!"

"Don't worry Ass I got it."

Ash just left.

"I'm coming to Ass wait up!"

"Okay, say aaaa."


"Now say shhh"


"Now say those together- Ash"


"You slut."

They headed farther into the jungle.

Then, a swarm of wild pikachu attacked them. Ash shot a lightning out of his butthole and blew some of them up.

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