Categories > TV > Supernatural > Burn it to the ground.
The next two weeks race by in a flash, each day blurring together into one big fit of arguments, refusing to pack, more tantrums, saying my goodbyes to my no good friends and getting wasted with Luke, Crowley and my on and off again girlfriend/friends with benefits Lisa. Eventually I begin to pack the night before, finally realising there was no getting away from my fate. Mom comes in each morning, threatens that if I don`t start to pack, she will do it for me and dump whatever won`t fit, and then I yell at her and the bombs start exploding all over again.
I throw jeans, most of them ripped at the knees and a big pile of freshly laundered shirts into a massive black suitcase. It is the same one I had lugged behind me when I was banished to live with Granddad and it makes me feel physically sick to look at it. I bag up my toiletries from the shared bathroom, leaving out just enough for the next morning and splash my face with cool water from the tap. These too find their way into the case, which stands guard in my doorway, the contents stacked messily inside.
This had been my room for nearly four years now, and I loved it. Moving sucked. No matter how careful you were, you always lost something important. Last time it had been my extensive CD collection. I was distraught at first, but then mum got me an IPod to replace my old dusty player. I never did end up buying the albums again though, not after I remembered who the one responsible for getting me into all of those old bands was.
Loud, angry rock music was screeching out of the tiny speakers connected to my IPod and I turn it up louder to discourage her further from coming in. I hear footsteps coming up the stairs muted a little by the soft cream carpet. They pause briefly outside of my door, then continue down the landing and to the left into the larger bedroom. I grin, satisfied that my plan had worked. For now at least.
Dinner is left outside the door, the mouth-watering scent of homemade chips drenched in salt, sausages, yolky egg and warm buttered toast wafting into the room from the gap under the door. Aware that is was a peace offering, I try to ignore it, but I hadn`t eaten all day. In fact I had barely eaten all week and was ravenous. I slowly open the door, looking right and left to see if she was outside, and grab the plate, practically pouncing on it, devouring it entirely in mere minutes.
I finish packing quickly, throwing my chargers, another pair of nearly bran new shoes and a few extra pair of boxers into the case and slam it shut, ready to be taken downstairs in the morning. Once more I hear mom`s soft footsteps on the staircase. This time when she pauses outside she knocks twice, very timidly.
“Piss off!” I scowl at the door, wishing I had some super cool laser eye power so I could just burn two holes in the door and right through her non existing heart.
She ignores me and comes in anyway, picking up the overflowing suitcase and placing it outside.
“Your plane leaves at ten AM tomorrow. I have taken the day off of work tomorrow so I can take you there.” She tells me sternly. “Be ready. I will wake you so you don`t oversleep.”
Damn bitch didn`t even trust me to set my alarm and get up in the morning? Well there goes my plans of “accidentally” sleeping through my alarm, thus causing me to miss my plane. I glare at her and nod once. Mom never took time off work, it just proved how eager she was to cart me off to someplace else far away from her. A whole God Damned ocean away from her.
Before the divorce wad even finalised, Dickhead Dan had swanned off to bloody England where his new tart, Kate Milligan was originally from. They had met at his garage. Winchester`s Auto Repairs it was called. Not the most original title, I`ll grant you, but I spent a good chunk of my childhood at that place. I loved it. He had promised me that it was all going to be mine one day, my empire of rusted old bangers and oil spills. He didn`t make a whole lot of money, just enough to get by, but he loved his work and we had food on the table and a roof over our head and we were one big happy family.
Then she came along and ruined it all.
She sashayed in, all big boobs and a winning smile and turned his head. Two months after she got her claws into him and he was leaving us. Last I heard he was living in some little town in England, with two new kids. His new big happy family. And me? Well I was just the bratty little sprog he forgot. And here I was showing up again for years later on his doorstep like a misdirected parcel.
Mom takes me to the airport the next morning. She hands me my passport, money to get a snack before take-off and kisses me goodbye something I do not appreciate. We make small talk over breakfast. Or rather she tries to, but I just cut her off with a snarl or point blank ignore her.
“This is for the best, you`ll see.”
“Yeah, the best for you. Like everyone else in my life, you`ve gotten sick of me so you are shipping me off to someone I haven`t seen in years, who I hate and who hates me, just because you have had enough of me.” I snap. “But yeah, I`m sure it is for the best.”
She was the one calling the shots here, the one with the choices. Sure, maybe I hadn`t been making the best choices lately, with all the drinking, bad behaviour, getting expelled and Lisa`s pregnancy scare, but at least I was only hurting myself, fucking up my own future.
We get in the care shortly after and before we get out she puts an arm on my shoulder.
“Now Dean, I know you aren`t exactly thrilled about this situation.”
I smirk, “No way! Whatever could have given you that idea?” I snort unattractively.
She goes on like I hadn`t make a sound. “But John is overjoyed that you are going to live with him and this really is your last chance now, so I expect to hear from him that you have been keeping in line.”
She goes quiet for a moment, tucking a strand of silky hair behind her ear. “And another thing. I haven`t exactly told John about the whole gay thing and you know how traditional he can be, so I was thinking that maybe – not forever- just for a little while, you could keep that well-“
As fun as it was to watch her babble uncomfortably, I had to set the record straight. “Mom, for the last time, what happened with me and Lucif-Luke that one time was nothing. We were drunk and well.” I sigh. “I am not gay, I like chicks, not dicks.”
She sighs as well, but thankfully drops it and gets my luggage from the back of the car. We make our way through the airport in silence before reaching my destination.
“Oh Honey, I am going to miss you so much!” she lies, looking all teary, embracing me. “Now I can`t actually drag you onto that plane, Dean, but I am expecting you to do the grown up thing here.” She warms. “If I find out that you ran off and didn`t board I will be livid. So just keep that in mind.”
I nod solemnly, knowing running off was just useless. Knowing my mom she had probably phoned up the airline and bribed an air stewardess to keep an eye on my and make sure I got on the plane. She hugs me one last time and then she is gone.
I board the enormous plane, a feeling of dread sinking in that wasn`t just done to my fear of flying. Two old ladies doused head to toe in the sickly sweet duty free perfume squeeze in next to me and offer me a hard boiled sweet, which I kindly decline. Sure, I was seriously pissed off, but I wasn`t going to take out my problem on some sweet old ladies who were only being friendly, if a little irritating.
“First time flying is it Dearie?” The one with silvery curls and expensive looking reading glasses asks me softly, offering a shy smile.
I just nod and force a smile back, wanting the journey to just be over already. My chest ached, my throat was dry, unlike my prickly feeling eyes and my heart kept doing these weird splutters thumps from its new spot inside my sore throat. I sure hope I wasn`t coming down with something.
Despite my worst fears, the plane doesn`t crash land into the ocean, instead it lands safely in a bottlenecked airport. I let my luggage circle the carousel three times before dragging the bags and case off and onto a trolley. In the distance, through the dispersing crowd I spot a familiar figure dressed in a worn black leather jacket similar to mine and my heart splutters uneasily and my chest tightens. There is nowhere I can hide, so I just stand and wait as he stroll casually towards me. I am still tired and rumpled from the flight and I am so not ready for this.
“Dean!” He smiles, patting me once on the shoulder.
I stiffen and fix my face into a cold mask of indifference, green eyes narrowed at the jacket he wore so similar to my own. Anyone walking by would think we were like any other father and son who loved each other and I hated that.
“I`ve missed you so much, kid. Come on,” he says, grabbing my heavy case, despite my protests that I could do it myself. I mean did he think I was still that scrawny little kid he abandoned? I don`t know, it had been a long time, maybe he did.
“Let`s go home.”
I throw jeans, most of them ripped at the knees and a big pile of freshly laundered shirts into a massive black suitcase. It is the same one I had lugged behind me when I was banished to live with Granddad and it makes me feel physically sick to look at it. I bag up my toiletries from the shared bathroom, leaving out just enough for the next morning and splash my face with cool water from the tap. These too find their way into the case, which stands guard in my doorway, the contents stacked messily inside.
This had been my room for nearly four years now, and I loved it. Moving sucked. No matter how careful you were, you always lost something important. Last time it had been my extensive CD collection. I was distraught at first, but then mum got me an IPod to replace my old dusty player. I never did end up buying the albums again though, not after I remembered who the one responsible for getting me into all of those old bands was.
Loud, angry rock music was screeching out of the tiny speakers connected to my IPod and I turn it up louder to discourage her further from coming in. I hear footsteps coming up the stairs muted a little by the soft cream carpet. They pause briefly outside of my door, then continue down the landing and to the left into the larger bedroom. I grin, satisfied that my plan had worked. For now at least.
Dinner is left outside the door, the mouth-watering scent of homemade chips drenched in salt, sausages, yolky egg and warm buttered toast wafting into the room from the gap under the door. Aware that is was a peace offering, I try to ignore it, but I hadn`t eaten all day. In fact I had barely eaten all week and was ravenous. I slowly open the door, looking right and left to see if she was outside, and grab the plate, practically pouncing on it, devouring it entirely in mere minutes.
I finish packing quickly, throwing my chargers, another pair of nearly bran new shoes and a few extra pair of boxers into the case and slam it shut, ready to be taken downstairs in the morning. Once more I hear mom`s soft footsteps on the staircase. This time when she pauses outside she knocks twice, very timidly.
“Piss off!” I scowl at the door, wishing I had some super cool laser eye power so I could just burn two holes in the door and right through her non existing heart.
She ignores me and comes in anyway, picking up the overflowing suitcase and placing it outside.
“Your plane leaves at ten AM tomorrow. I have taken the day off of work tomorrow so I can take you there.” She tells me sternly. “Be ready. I will wake you so you don`t oversleep.”
Damn bitch didn`t even trust me to set my alarm and get up in the morning? Well there goes my plans of “accidentally” sleeping through my alarm, thus causing me to miss my plane. I glare at her and nod once. Mom never took time off work, it just proved how eager she was to cart me off to someplace else far away from her. A whole God Damned ocean away from her.
Before the divorce wad even finalised, Dickhead Dan had swanned off to bloody England where his new tart, Kate Milligan was originally from. They had met at his garage. Winchester`s Auto Repairs it was called. Not the most original title, I`ll grant you, but I spent a good chunk of my childhood at that place. I loved it. He had promised me that it was all going to be mine one day, my empire of rusted old bangers and oil spills. He didn`t make a whole lot of money, just enough to get by, but he loved his work and we had food on the table and a roof over our head and we were one big happy family.
Then she came along and ruined it all.
She sashayed in, all big boobs and a winning smile and turned his head. Two months after she got her claws into him and he was leaving us. Last I heard he was living in some little town in England, with two new kids. His new big happy family. And me? Well I was just the bratty little sprog he forgot. And here I was showing up again for years later on his doorstep like a misdirected parcel.
Mom takes me to the airport the next morning. She hands me my passport, money to get a snack before take-off and kisses me goodbye something I do not appreciate. We make small talk over breakfast. Or rather she tries to, but I just cut her off with a snarl or point blank ignore her.
“This is for the best, you`ll see.”
“Yeah, the best for you. Like everyone else in my life, you`ve gotten sick of me so you are shipping me off to someone I haven`t seen in years, who I hate and who hates me, just because you have had enough of me.” I snap. “But yeah, I`m sure it is for the best.”
She was the one calling the shots here, the one with the choices. Sure, maybe I hadn`t been making the best choices lately, with all the drinking, bad behaviour, getting expelled and Lisa`s pregnancy scare, but at least I was only hurting myself, fucking up my own future.
We get in the care shortly after and before we get out she puts an arm on my shoulder.
“Now Dean, I know you aren`t exactly thrilled about this situation.”
I smirk, “No way! Whatever could have given you that idea?” I snort unattractively.
She goes on like I hadn`t make a sound. “But John is overjoyed that you are going to live with him and this really is your last chance now, so I expect to hear from him that you have been keeping in line.”
She goes quiet for a moment, tucking a strand of silky hair behind her ear. “And another thing. I haven`t exactly told John about the whole gay thing and you know how traditional he can be, so I was thinking that maybe – not forever- just for a little while, you could keep that well-“
As fun as it was to watch her babble uncomfortably, I had to set the record straight. “Mom, for the last time, what happened with me and Lucif-Luke that one time was nothing. We were drunk and well.” I sigh. “I am not gay, I like chicks, not dicks.”
She sighs as well, but thankfully drops it and gets my luggage from the back of the car. We make our way through the airport in silence before reaching my destination.
“Oh Honey, I am going to miss you so much!” she lies, looking all teary, embracing me. “Now I can`t actually drag you onto that plane, Dean, but I am expecting you to do the grown up thing here.” She warms. “If I find out that you ran off and didn`t board I will be livid. So just keep that in mind.”
I nod solemnly, knowing running off was just useless. Knowing my mom she had probably phoned up the airline and bribed an air stewardess to keep an eye on my and make sure I got on the plane. She hugs me one last time and then she is gone.
I board the enormous plane, a feeling of dread sinking in that wasn`t just done to my fear of flying. Two old ladies doused head to toe in the sickly sweet duty free perfume squeeze in next to me and offer me a hard boiled sweet, which I kindly decline. Sure, I was seriously pissed off, but I wasn`t going to take out my problem on some sweet old ladies who were only being friendly, if a little irritating.
“First time flying is it Dearie?” The one with silvery curls and expensive looking reading glasses asks me softly, offering a shy smile.
I just nod and force a smile back, wanting the journey to just be over already. My chest ached, my throat was dry, unlike my prickly feeling eyes and my heart kept doing these weird splutters thumps from its new spot inside my sore throat. I sure hope I wasn`t coming down with something.
Despite my worst fears, the plane doesn`t crash land into the ocean, instead it lands safely in a bottlenecked airport. I let my luggage circle the carousel three times before dragging the bags and case off and onto a trolley. In the distance, through the dispersing crowd I spot a familiar figure dressed in a worn black leather jacket similar to mine and my heart splutters uneasily and my chest tightens. There is nowhere I can hide, so I just stand and wait as he stroll casually towards me. I am still tired and rumpled from the flight and I am so not ready for this.
“Dean!” He smiles, patting me once on the shoulder.
I stiffen and fix my face into a cold mask of indifference, green eyes narrowed at the jacket he wore so similar to my own. Anyone walking by would think we were like any other father and son who loved each other and I hated that.
“I`ve missed you so much, kid. Come on,” he says, grabbing my heavy case, despite my protests that I could do it myself. I mean did he think I was still that scrawny little kid he abandoned? I don`t know, it had been a long time, maybe he did.
“Let`s go home.”
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