Categories > Anime/Manga > Yu-Gi-Oh! > The lift
The rise and fall
1 reviewSeto and Mai are heading to watch a duel. They are unimpressed by the idea of having to share a small space together for the short ride and then events take a turn for the worse.
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The lift
(#) tsutsuji 2006-08-12
Very good start! Very nice, vivid and clear descriptions of the setting and actions, and the dialogue is totally in character. Interesting to see these two together. I'll be watching for more of this!Author's response
Thanks for taking a look and reviewing. I hope you're still enjoying, I am loving writing it although I'm getting a bit hung up on pace - do you think it's getting a bit slow? I'm finding it hard to get from hatred to any emotion more fluffy without it seeming clunky and forced. Every time I sit down and think - right this is the scene where they're going to mellow out a bit they end up having another argument! Damn them both! Any advice?
Jen
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