Categories > Celebrities > Guns n' Roses > Through The Eyes Of...
Izzy
Everyone around me might be cheering right now but I feel like screaming in agony. My heart is freaking breaking into even tinier pieces at the moment if that’s even possible. Axl just left me fucking two days ago; the day before yesterday and he’s already trying to score with some fucking chick? He’s at least spent enough time talking to her tonight that she came running out to see if he was ok after Nikki crashed his cart into the pool. If he hadn’t been seriously flirting with her she wouldn’t have been worried enough about him to fight through the crowd yelling his name; it’s not like he’s someone famous like Nikki. No, he’d been in there working his charm on her and believe me when he wants to be charming he’s got it in spades.
It’s not just that he’s flirting either; there’s something else, something in his eyes when he looks at her, it’s protective, infatuated almost. Why does he give a fuck about her? Was he seeing her before? Is she partly what’s been up his ass? Because my dick sure hadn’t been very often before we broke up. What does he want to fuck chicks now? Is that his deal? I know I hurt him a little while ago when I told him off but that’s too fucking bad, when was the last time he gave a shit about my feelings? He sure didn’t the other night when he knocked me the fuck out! He didn’t the morning after he did that either! He didn’t even say he was sorry or offer to put a bag of ice on the fucking huge bruises all over my face! No! He took me over and dumped me off at Duff and Slash’s apartment and told them I shouldn’t be alone and good luck. Well fuck him! That stupid little bitch he’s with will figure it out soon enough too! Axl won’t be there when you need him if you aren’t perfect in his eyes. I fucked up, got hooked on dope, so I’m out as far as Axl’s concerned. The girl will screw up at some point too I’m fucking sure and then we’ll see how things go.
I snap out of it a little when I hear Nikki telling Duff that everything he could possibly want is on display in front of him in different sizes small, medium, and large. Duff’s eyes go wide as he takes it all in and Slash giggles and points his finger at him and Duff knows that now he’s the one who’s been caught staring. He quickly pulls Curly Sue over to him and gives him a sweet kiss; reassuring him that he’s not interested in what’s on display in front of him.
“Come on,” Nikki says, let’s get in the house and I’ll find some clothes for you two,” he says pointing at Duff and Slash. Everyone grabs some towels from the shelves beside the pool and starts to towel off on the way back inside. Nikki rummages through his dresser and comes up with a pair of sweats for Slash along with a t-shirt and since Duff is closer to his size he has jeans to fit him as well as another shirt. Nikki takes all of their stuff and throws it into a pile to put in the washing machine in the hallway outside his bedroom. Tommy, Nikki, and I grab our own clothes and we all get dressed in Nikki’s bedroom. When Slash strips his wet jeans off I hear Nikki say “Well, well, well, looks like Duff gets quite a view of his own; he didn’t need to check out our junk!”
All heads turn to Slash who immediately covers himself with the sweatpants, holding them in front of his crotch. Tommy and Nikki get evil, mischievous looks on their faces and poor Slash suddenly finds his arms being held behind his back so everyone can see what Nikki meant. I turn to Duff and ask “Have you been holding out on me or what?” Duff just looks at me, a little startled but quickly gets his wits back and says “Shit, you spend a lot of time alone with him Stradlin! You think I was going to tell you he’s packing so you could try and find out for yourself? I don’t think so!” Duff laughs and walks over and palms Slash’s crotch. “That’s all mine!”
“Don’t worry Duff, I’d never try and steal your little Curly Sue; I know you two are fucking head over heels for each other,” I tease. I wouldn’t though, I wouldn’t hurt those two for anything; they were the best friends I’d had besides Axl in my whole life. Poor Slash blushes and everyone cracks up at him being called Curly Sue. At least my mind is off of Axl for the moment; I love these guys.
Nikki throws everyone's wet clothes into the washing machine and we all get dressed and everyone goes back downstairs and drinks some more. Duff gets like totally blackout drunk and Nikki and I drag him into one of the guest rooms and strip him down to his underwear and lay him under the covers on one of the big beds. Slash is still raring to go though and Steven has reappeared so Nikki and I invite them upstairs to enjoy some of the bounty laid out in Nikki’s closet. Nikki unlocks his bedroom door and then the closet. Steven’s all about shooting up, he’s done it plenty of times before which sort of blows Slash’s mind. The kid is so innocent in some ways for having grown up on the streets of LA and losing his virginity at 13! I can tell Slash really wants to try it but he knows Duff’s going to be upset with him. “Dude,” Nikki says soothingly, “Duff’s never going to know, he’s passed out drunk! By the time he wakes up the high will have worn off!”
“Ok,” Slash finally agrees and Nikki and I mix him up just enough to get him high and I gently inject it into a vein in the crook of his arm. Well, maybe it was a little too much because one minute he’s enjoying himself and reveling in the euphoria that comes with herion and the next he’s passed out cold on the floor.
“Shit!” I yell, scrambling over to him. Inside I’m pleading with whatever god there is that he didn’t fucking OD! But he’s fine, his breathing is steady, his heart beat’s strong, he’s just asleep, like knocked out for the night asleep. Nikki laughs and picks him up and carries him over to the guest room where Duff is sleeping and we put Slash in bed beside his lover and cover them both up. Slash moans though and I hear a funny sound, like someone pissing. I pull the covers back and sure enough he’s pissed all over himself and the bed. He is going to be so embarrassed in the morning and Duff is not going to be happy at all! Nikki and I just stand there and laughs and Nikki grumbles that not only is he going to have to get the golf cart hauled out of the pool but now he’s going to have to get the mattress clean too. What a fucking night.
Nikki and I go downstairs to look for something sugary to eat; heroin makes you crave things like chocolate, all other food can go to hell. I lay down on the hearth in front of the lit fireplace and wait for Nikki to come back. I’m so fucking numb I can’t even think about Axl anymore right now, this is fucking great.
Everyone around me might be cheering right now but I feel like screaming in agony. My heart is freaking breaking into even tinier pieces at the moment if that’s even possible. Axl just left me fucking two days ago; the day before yesterday and he’s already trying to score with some fucking chick? He’s at least spent enough time talking to her tonight that she came running out to see if he was ok after Nikki crashed his cart into the pool. If he hadn’t been seriously flirting with her she wouldn’t have been worried enough about him to fight through the crowd yelling his name; it’s not like he’s someone famous like Nikki. No, he’d been in there working his charm on her and believe me when he wants to be charming he’s got it in spades.
It’s not just that he’s flirting either; there’s something else, something in his eyes when he looks at her, it’s protective, infatuated almost. Why does he give a fuck about her? Was he seeing her before? Is she partly what’s been up his ass? Because my dick sure hadn’t been very often before we broke up. What does he want to fuck chicks now? Is that his deal? I know I hurt him a little while ago when I told him off but that’s too fucking bad, when was the last time he gave a shit about my feelings? He sure didn’t the other night when he knocked me the fuck out! He didn’t the morning after he did that either! He didn’t even say he was sorry or offer to put a bag of ice on the fucking huge bruises all over my face! No! He took me over and dumped me off at Duff and Slash’s apartment and told them I shouldn’t be alone and good luck. Well fuck him! That stupid little bitch he’s with will figure it out soon enough too! Axl won’t be there when you need him if you aren’t perfect in his eyes. I fucked up, got hooked on dope, so I’m out as far as Axl’s concerned. The girl will screw up at some point too I’m fucking sure and then we’ll see how things go.
I snap out of it a little when I hear Nikki telling Duff that everything he could possibly want is on display in front of him in different sizes small, medium, and large. Duff’s eyes go wide as he takes it all in and Slash giggles and points his finger at him and Duff knows that now he’s the one who’s been caught staring. He quickly pulls Curly Sue over to him and gives him a sweet kiss; reassuring him that he’s not interested in what’s on display in front of him.
“Come on,” Nikki says, let’s get in the house and I’ll find some clothes for you two,” he says pointing at Duff and Slash. Everyone grabs some towels from the shelves beside the pool and starts to towel off on the way back inside. Nikki rummages through his dresser and comes up with a pair of sweats for Slash along with a t-shirt and since Duff is closer to his size he has jeans to fit him as well as another shirt. Nikki takes all of their stuff and throws it into a pile to put in the washing machine in the hallway outside his bedroom. Tommy, Nikki, and I grab our own clothes and we all get dressed in Nikki’s bedroom. When Slash strips his wet jeans off I hear Nikki say “Well, well, well, looks like Duff gets quite a view of his own; he didn’t need to check out our junk!”
All heads turn to Slash who immediately covers himself with the sweatpants, holding them in front of his crotch. Tommy and Nikki get evil, mischievous looks on their faces and poor Slash suddenly finds his arms being held behind his back so everyone can see what Nikki meant. I turn to Duff and ask “Have you been holding out on me or what?” Duff just looks at me, a little startled but quickly gets his wits back and says “Shit, you spend a lot of time alone with him Stradlin! You think I was going to tell you he’s packing so you could try and find out for yourself? I don’t think so!” Duff laughs and walks over and palms Slash’s crotch. “That’s all mine!”
“Don’t worry Duff, I’d never try and steal your little Curly Sue; I know you two are fucking head over heels for each other,” I tease. I wouldn’t though, I wouldn’t hurt those two for anything; they were the best friends I’d had besides Axl in my whole life. Poor Slash blushes and everyone cracks up at him being called Curly Sue. At least my mind is off of Axl for the moment; I love these guys.
Nikki throws everyone's wet clothes into the washing machine and we all get dressed and everyone goes back downstairs and drinks some more. Duff gets like totally blackout drunk and Nikki and I drag him into one of the guest rooms and strip him down to his underwear and lay him under the covers on one of the big beds. Slash is still raring to go though and Steven has reappeared so Nikki and I invite them upstairs to enjoy some of the bounty laid out in Nikki’s closet. Nikki unlocks his bedroom door and then the closet. Steven’s all about shooting up, he’s done it plenty of times before which sort of blows Slash’s mind. The kid is so innocent in some ways for having grown up on the streets of LA and losing his virginity at 13! I can tell Slash really wants to try it but he knows Duff’s going to be upset with him. “Dude,” Nikki says soothingly, “Duff’s never going to know, he’s passed out drunk! By the time he wakes up the high will have worn off!”
“Ok,” Slash finally agrees and Nikki and I mix him up just enough to get him high and I gently inject it into a vein in the crook of his arm. Well, maybe it was a little too much because one minute he’s enjoying himself and reveling in the euphoria that comes with herion and the next he’s passed out cold on the floor.
“Shit!” I yell, scrambling over to him. Inside I’m pleading with whatever god there is that he didn’t fucking OD! But he’s fine, his breathing is steady, his heart beat’s strong, he’s just asleep, like knocked out for the night asleep. Nikki laughs and picks him up and carries him over to the guest room where Duff is sleeping and we put Slash in bed beside his lover and cover them both up. Slash moans though and I hear a funny sound, like someone pissing. I pull the covers back and sure enough he’s pissed all over himself and the bed. He is going to be so embarrassed in the morning and Duff is not going to be happy at all! Nikki and I just stand there and laughs and Nikki grumbles that not only is he going to have to get the golf cart hauled out of the pool but now he’s going to have to get the mattress clean too. What a fucking night.
Nikki and I go downstairs to look for something sugary to eat; heroin makes you crave things like chocolate, all other food can go to hell. I lay down on the hearth in front of the lit fireplace and wait for Nikki to come back. I’m so fucking numb I can’t even think about Axl anymore right now, this is fucking great.
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