Categories > Celebrities > Guns n' Roses > Through The Eyes Of...
Axl
Izzy had apparently awakened and used his catlike stealth to get up without Erin or I noticing. Erin still lay on my chest. My hand runs across Izzy's cold place where Izzy had slept next to me on the bus's fold out. My eyes blur and I try to focus without my contacts. My eyes soon see Izzy sitting next to the window taking in the scenery. He inhales slowly and exhales even slower, dazed at the smoke. Something was on his mind. He's already had his wakeup shot, so last night must have been bothering him.
He senses that I'm awake and looks over at me. He isn't drunk, I don't think, but there's a bottle sitting at his feet. I know that look on his face anywhere. Guilt. He shrugs and slightly shakes his head. I can see a tear roll down his cheek. I quickly push Erin off me and scamper out of the bed. Izzy needed me.
"Hey! What the!?..." But Erin stops when she sees that Izzy is crying. She sits up looking concerned, but we know it's fake. She was just fishing for information for Nikki.
"Erin," I say, "go shower, I need to talk to Izz alone." I point at the bathroom, never taking my eyes off Izzy.
Surprisingly, Erin didn't bitch. She immediately began moving. "Yeah, sure. If there's anything I can do..."
"I'll let you know," I cut her off.
She wraps up in a sheet and goes to the bathroom. Izzy sighs in relief once she has left the room. The water immediately cuts on.
I cup Izzy's face in my hands and force him to look me in the eyes. "Darlin what's wrong?" I ask in a tone that tells him he better lay it straight and not feed me bullshit I'd only see through it any way
"What's wrong?" He smirks behind the tears, "How about last night?" He tears spull out with muffled cries. He's doing his best to look at anything but my eyes..
But he had agreed to last night. What was different now? "But I thought..."
"Yeah, I did too Axe," he sniffles and wipes his tears, "I thought getting back in the saddle would help. .but I was wrong. Yeah, I needed the sex. And being in you was wonderful... But it was the first time since...it should just been us. Axl, I want to give myself to you but I'm scared it'll hurt, or that I can't do it and I don't want her there for that shit. I don't want her here at all, but I get it. I'll go along with this shit...but sometimes I need it to just be us. I don't feel as intimate with you when a chick is involved," he softly explains.
"Izz why didn't you tell me this last night?" I ask.
"Cuz I didn't know until I woke up this morning," he wipes his nose on the back of his hand again. I woke up with two sets of arms laying on my stomach. I just lay there looking at the two of you sleeping. You both looked so...comfortable."
"And what did you feel?" I ask him and stroke away his tears with my thumb
"Like a cheating prick still," he shrugs, "I know you know I have been a lying cheat, I felt like I was just rubbing it in. You saw the way I moved with her, the way I touched her. I know that hurt you Fireball and I'm so sorry. Last night was a mistake."
"It wasn't. We have to do this Izzy and you know it. Maybe it was badly timed..."
"I just wanted our first time together again to be more than this," he motions to the bed, "...just us. You know?"
"Angel you've been so weird where that stuff is concerned that I thought maybe a chick wouldn't remind you so much what happened."
"Do you fucking forget who the cunt is!? She Nikki's! The same motherfucker who let this shit happen to me!" He shouts extinguishers his cigarette and turns his back on me staring out the window.
"And I thought you'd be feeling vengeful. You fucked Nikki's bitch. We fucked her. And we fucked her lime ashes never been fucked before."
"I don't fucking trust her Axe," he sighs.
I grab his shoulders and turn him to face me. "Trust me darlin."
"We're playing right into Nikki's hand," Izzy looks at me with concern.
I wrap my arms around his waist and pull him to me. "Who says that's not part of the plan?" I smirk.
"Ain't following Axe," he sighs.
"What is the first rule of magic?" I smile.
Izzy thinks with a scrunched brow for a few minutes then they raise with a smile. "Misdirection."
"Exactly. We stage fights. We make it look like she's is coming between us. Then Nikki is satisfied and blissfully unaware of the truth. I mean Erin's not always going to be around you know, she'll come and go."
Izzy smirks down at me, "And all this time I thought you were letting your dick make all the decisions."
"Well my IQ is pretty high Angel," I smile.
Izzy's face goes blank, "So is Nikki's."
We hear the showers cut off. "Angel, van imake up last night to you this morning?"
"What about her," he motions at the bathroom.
"Say I had band issues. You stay here, be a dick to her, get rid of her. Then in an hour I'll come back and give you what you should have had last night."
Izzy nods, "Pick a fight with Erin, no problem. You better get dressed and jet before she gets out of the bathroom."
I give him a quick peck on the lips and scurry about getting dressed like somebody's boyfriend just got here to bust me. I slip quietly from the room.
Erin
When I came out of the bathroom Axl was gone. Izzy was pacing by the bed and smoking a cigarette.
"You OK?" I ask.
His eyes glare over at me sideways as his pacing never lets up. "Like I'd tell you."
"What? Last night...the way you looked at me...touched me..." I knew I hadn't made it up. Izzy was so gentle, tender, gentlemanly. "I thought bygones were bigones. I thought we were starting over, the three of us."
"I'm only doing this because I have no choice but to share Axl with you! Of all the goddamn things you could come up with as payment for my life was being with Axl? Willing to be with both of us?" He asks glaring at me and dragging again from his cigarette. As his pass passes the TV he grabs the bottle on it and chugs some.
"Where's Axl?" I ask him.
"Where's Axl? Axl ran the fuck off because he thinks that you like fucking me more and that I like fucking you more! You have fucked up my life you meddlesome bitch! I sure hope doing this shit for Nikki is worth it to you!"
"You don't know him like I do," I shake my head.
"But he's cum down my throat too. I can't get the taste of him out of my mouth. And you're here to destroy Axl and I. Why the fuck would I tell you the time of fucking day? Just...fuck off."
She grabs her purse. "I hope you don't wake up like this every morning," and storms from the room.
Axl
I go shower in Stevens room while I wait for Izzy to run off Erin. When I return he is in the middle of the room. Only a hotel towel is tucked around his waist. He has a Q-tip in one ear. Water drips fom the tips of his hair and down his back and stomach.
"I've never seen anything as beautiful as you Angel," I say with a hand to my chest because its pounding. It aches so incredibly with love for him.
"Thanks for showering off the smell of her perfume," he says discarding the Q-tip and crossing over to me. He strokes my jawlinevwith his thumb. "I love you so much Fireball."
And then he kisses me like he hasn't in years. The kiss is soft and gentle. Under the surface it begs for more, but Izzy doesn't want to push me. It was how we kissed as kids. He never knew my moods back then. One kiss might earn another, yet another might earn him a black eye. I wrap my hands into his wet hair and hold him to me and deapen the kiss. It gets hot and heavy fast because I've been missing this so much. And he was right, it wasn't the same with Erin there. I kiss him back and gently lay him across the bed. He pulls my shirt off while I wiggle out of my pants. Soon the heat of our bare bodies are one.
We kiss and touch and stroke each other for a while until Izzy breaks the moment. "Fireball, I do want you, but I'm scared."
"We'll go as slow as you need Angel...or not at all if that's what you want."
"Give me your fingers," he whispers as he reaches over for a tube of lube. He squirts it over my index and middle fingers. He looks at me and nods.
I kiss him and slide my fingers down to his opening. I can feel him tense. "Relax darlin, its me. I'd never hurt you Angel."
After some more kisses he relaxes and I slide my fingers in. Izzy hisses behind my lips and pushes at my shoulders.
"Does it hurt, should I stop?" I ask.
"Just surprised me is all. I'm sorry I'm so jumpy.*
" You don't have to apologize Izz." I move my fingers and Izzy moans. "Does it hurt?"
"No, sorta feels like the first time its been so long. Don't stop."
So I don't. We make out for a long time. Finally I have to ask Izzy if he was ready.
He nods. "I love you and I trust you and I've done this with you more than anyone else on the planet...but I'm nervous darlin."
"It's OK" I kiss him, "we can wait if you want."
"I don't," he shakes his head, " I'm just scared," I see a tear roll from the corner of his eye
I lean over him and whisper in his ear, "I'll never make it hurt Izz."
I line my cock up with his entrance and slide in very slowly as Izzy winces a bit. When I'm all in I just hold him and kiss him. I tell him how much I live him. How beautiful he is. How good he feels. Slowly he starts to respond back and lets me glide slowly. He seems as if he can take it. I reach for his cock
"Theres not gonna be time for that dar..." But before he can finish his sentence his cum goes over my stomach. He heaves and pants with wide eyes. "Axe..."
"That was way better than our first time."
We both lightheartedly chuckle.
Izzy turns to me with a serious look. "Thanks for understanding. And thanks for this, for making up last night."
I run my thumb across his bottom lip, "Don't you know I'd do anything for you by now?"
I lay facing him, side by side, our bodies mirrored until Izzy drift off to sleep. I got up and got dressed. I tracked down a ratty folder with blank paper and a yellow pencil someone had chewed the fuck out of. I go slide into the kitchen booth and words flow from me! Everybody is asleep so I've got peace and quiet.
What I write is my heart's song to Izzy.
When I look into your eyes
I can see a love restrained
But darlin' when I hold you
Don't you know I feel the same
Nothin' lasts forever
And we both know hearts can change
And it's hard to hold a candle
In the cold November rain
We've been through this such a long long time
Just tryin' to kill the pain, oo yeah
But love is always coming and love is always going
And no one's really sure who's lettin' go today
Walking away
If we could take the time
To lay it on the line
I could rest my head
Just knowin' that you were mine
All mine
So if you want to love me
Then darlin' don't refrain
Or I'll just end up walkin'
In the cold November rain
Do you need some time on your own
Do you need some time all alone
Everybody needs some time
On their own
Don't you know you need some time all alone
I know it's hard to keep an open heart
When even friends seem out to harm you
But if you could heal a broken heart
Wouldn't time be out to charm you
Sometimes I need some time on my
Own
Sometimes I need some time all alone
Everybody needs some time
On their own
Don't you know you need some time all alone
And when your fears subside
And shadows still remain, oh yeah
I know that you can love me
When there's no one left to blame
So never mind the darkness
We still can find a way
'Cause nothin' lasts forever
Even cold November rain
Don't ya think that you need somebody
Don't ya think that you need someone
Everybody needs somebody
You're not the only one
I neatly fold it and write To my Dark Angel on it and rest it on top of his cigarettes. Now I have to go make shit up with Erin
Izzy had apparently awakened and used his catlike stealth to get up without Erin or I noticing. Erin still lay on my chest. My hand runs across Izzy's cold place where Izzy had slept next to me on the bus's fold out. My eyes blur and I try to focus without my contacts. My eyes soon see Izzy sitting next to the window taking in the scenery. He inhales slowly and exhales even slower, dazed at the smoke. Something was on his mind. He's already had his wakeup shot, so last night must have been bothering him.
He senses that I'm awake and looks over at me. He isn't drunk, I don't think, but there's a bottle sitting at his feet. I know that look on his face anywhere. Guilt. He shrugs and slightly shakes his head. I can see a tear roll down his cheek. I quickly push Erin off me and scamper out of the bed. Izzy needed me.
"Hey! What the!?..." But Erin stops when she sees that Izzy is crying. She sits up looking concerned, but we know it's fake. She was just fishing for information for Nikki.
"Erin," I say, "go shower, I need to talk to Izz alone." I point at the bathroom, never taking my eyes off Izzy.
Surprisingly, Erin didn't bitch. She immediately began moving. "Yeah, sure. If there's anything I can do..."
"I'll let you know," I cut her off.
She wraps up in a sheet and goes to the bathroom. Izzy sighs in relief once she has left the room. The water immediately cuts on.
I cup Izzy's face in my hands and force him to look me in the eyes. "Darlin what's wrong?" I ask in a tone that tells him he better lay it straight and not feed me bullshit I'd only see through it any way
"What's wrong?" He smirks behind the tears, "How about last night?" He tears spull out with muffled cries. He's doing his best to look at anything but my eyes..
But he had agreed to last night. What was different now? "But I thought..."
"Yeah, I did too Axe," he sniffles and wipes his tears, "I thought getting back in the saddle would help. .but I was wrong. Yeah, I needed the sex. And being in you was wonderful... But it was the first time since...it should just been us. Axl, I want to give myself to you but I'm scared it'll hurt, or that I can't do it and I don't want her there for that shit. I don't want her here at all, but I get it. I'll go along with this shit...but sometimes I need it to just be us. I don't feel as intimate with you when a chick is involved," he softly explains.
"Izz why didn't you tell me this last night?" I ask.
"Cuz I didn't know until I woke up this morning," he wipes his nose on the back of his hand again. I woke up with two sets of arms laying on my stomach. I just lay there looking at the two of you sleeping. You both looked so...comfortable."
"And what did you feel?" I ask him and stroke away his tears with my thumb
"Like a cheating prick still," he shrugs, "I know you know I have been a lying cheat, I felt like I was just rubbing it in. You saw the way I moved with her, the way I touched her. I know that hurt you Fireball and I'm so sorry. Last night was a mistake."
"It wasn't. We have to do this Izzy and you know it. Maybe it was badly timed..."
"I just wanted our first time together again to be more than this," he motions to the bed, "...just us. You know?"
"Angel you've been so weird where that stuff is concerned that I thought maybe a chick wouldn't remind you so much what happened."
"Do you fucking forget who the cunt is!? She Nikki's! The same motherfucker who let this shit happen to me!" He shouts extinguishers his cigarette and turns his back on me staring out the window.
"And I thought you'd be feeling vengeful. You fucked Nikki's bitch. We fucked her. And we fucked her lime ashes never been fucked before."
"I don't fucking trust her Axe," he sighs.
I grab his shoulders and turn him to face me. "Trust me darlin."
"We're playing right into Nikki's hand," Izzy looks at me with concern.
I wrap my arms around his waist and pull him to me. "Who says that's not part of the plan?" I smirk.
"Ain't following Axe," he sighs.
"What is the first rule of magic?" I smile.
Izzy thinks with a scrunched brow for a few minutes then they raise with a smile. "Misdirection."
"Exactly. We stage fights. We make it look like she's is coming between us. Then Nikki is satisfied and blissfully unaware of the truth. I mean Erin's not always going to be around you know, she'll come and go."
Izzy smirks down at me, "And all this time I thought you were letting your dick make all the decisions."
"Well my IQ is pretty high Angel," I smile.
Izzy's face goes blank, "So is Nikki's."
We hear the showers cut off. "Angel, van imake up last night to you this morning?"
"What about her," he motions at the bathroom.
"Say I had band issues. You stay here, be a dick to her, get rid of her. Then in an hour I'll come back and give you what you should have had last night."
Izzy nods, "Pick a fight with Erin, no problem. You better get dressed and jet before she gets out of the bathroom."
I give him a quick peck on the lips and scurry about getting dressed like somebody's boyfriend just got here to bust me. I slip quietly from the room.
Erin
When I came out of the bathroom Axl was gone. Izzy was pacing by the bed and smoking a cigarette.
"You OK?" I ask.
His eyes glare over at me sideways as his pacing never lets up. "Like I'd tell you."
"What? Last night...the way you looked at me...touched me..." I knew I hadn't made it up. Izzy was so gentle, tender, gentlemanly. "I thought bygones were bigones. I thought we were starting over, the three of us."
"I'm only doing this because I have no choice but to share Axl with you! Of all the goddamn things you could come up with as payment for my life was being with Axl? Willing to be with both of us?" He asks glaring at me and dragging again from his cigarette. As his pass passes the TV he grabs the bottle on it and chugs some.
"Where's Axl?" I ask him.
"Where's Axl? Axl ran the fuck off because he thinks that you like fucking me more and that I like fucking you more! You have fucked up my life you meddlesome bitch! I sure hope doing this shit for Nikki is worth it to you!"
"You don't know him like I do," I shake my head.
"But he's cum down my throat too. I can't get the taste of him out of my mouth. And you're here to destroy Axl and I. Why the fuck would I tell you the time of fucking day? Just...fuck off."
She grabs her purse. "I hope you don't wake up like this every morning," and storms from the room.
Axl
I go shower in Stevens room while I wait for Izzy to run off Erin. When I return he is in the middle of the room. Only a hotel towel is tucked around his waist. He has a Q-tip in one ear. Water drips fom the tips of his hair and down his back and stomach.
"I've never seen anything as beautiful as you Angel," I say with a hand to my chest because its pounding. It aches so incredibly with love for him.
"Thanks for showering off the smell of her perfume," he says discarding the Q-tip and crossing over to me. He strokes my jawlinevwith his thumb. "I love you so much Fireball."
And then he kisses me like he hasn't in years. The kiss is soft and gentle. Under the surface it begs for more, but Izzy doesn't want to push me. It was how we kissed as kids. He never knew my moods back then. One kiss might earn another, yet another might earn him a black eye. I wrap my hands into his wet hair and hold him to me and deapen the kiss. It gets hot and heavy fast because I've been missing this so much. And he was right, it wasn't the same with Erin there. I kiss him back and gently lay him across the bed. He pulls my shirt off while I wiggle out of my pants. Soon the heat of our bare bodies are one.
We kiss and touch and stroke each other for a while until Izzy breaks the moment. "Fireball, I do want you, but I'm scared."
"We'll go as slow as you need Angel...or not at all if that's what you want."
"Give me your fingers," he whispers as he reaches over for a tube of lube. He squirts it over my index and middle fingers. He looks at me and nods.
I kiss him and slide my fingers down to his opening. I can feel him tense. "Relax darlin, its me. I'd never hurt you Angel."
After some more kisses he relaxes and I slide my fingers in. Izzy hisses behind my lips and pushes at my shoulders.
"Does it hurt, should I stop?" I ask.
"Just surprised me is all. I'm sorry I'm so jumpy.*
" You don't have to apologize Izz." I move my fingers and Izzy moans. "Does it hurt?"
"No, sorta feels like the first time its been so long. Don't stop."
So I don't. We make out for a long time. Finally I have to ask Izzy if he was ready.
He nods. "I love you and I trust you and I've done this with you more than anyone else on the planet...but I'm nervous darlin."
"It's OK" I kiss him, "we can wait if you want."
"I don't," he shakes his head, " I'm just scared," I see a tear roll from the corner of his eye
I lean over him and whisper in his ear, "I'll never make it hurt Izz."
I line my cock up with his entrance and slide in very slowly as Izzy winces a bit. When I'm all in I just hold him and kiss him. I tell him how much I live him. How beautiful he is. How good he feels. Slowly he starts to respond back and lets me glide slowly. He seems as if he can take it. I reach for his cock
"Theres not gonna be time for that dar..." But before he can finish his sentence his cum goes over my stomach. He heaves and pants with wide eyes. "Axe..."
"That was way better than our first time."
We both lightheartedly chuckle.
Izzy turns to me with a serious look. "Thanks for understanding. And thanks for this, for making up last night."
I run my thumb across his bottom lip, "Don't you know I'd do anything for you by now?"
I lay facing him, side by side, our bodies mirrored until Izzy drift off to sleep. I got up and got dressed. I tracked down a ratty folder with blank paper and a yellow pencil someone had chewed the fuck out of. I go slide into the kitchen booth and words flow from me! Everybody is asleep so I've got peace and quiet.
What I write is my heart's song to Izzy.
When I look into your eyes
I can see a love restrained
But darlin' when I hold you
Don't you know I feel the same
Nothin' lasts forever
And we both know hearts can change
And it's hard to hold a candle
In the cold November rain
We've been through this such a long long time
Just tryin' to kill the pain, oo yeah
But love is always coming and love is always going
And no one's really sure who's lettin' go today
Walking away
If we could take the time
To lay it on the line
I could rest my head
Just knowin' that you were mine
All mine
So if you want to love me
Then darlin' don't refrain
Or I'll just end up walkin'
In the cold November rain
Do you need some time on your own
Do you need some time all alone
Everybody needs some time
On their own
Don't you know you need some time all alone
I know it's hard to keep an open heart
When even friends seem out to harm you
But if you could heal a broken heart
Wouldn't time be out to charm you
Sometimes I need some time on my
Own
Sometimes I need some time all alone
Everybody needs some time
On their own
Don't you know you need some time all alone
And when your fears subside
And shadows still remain, oh yeah
I know that you can love me
When there's no one left to blame
So never mind the darkness
We still can find a way
'Cause nothin' lasts forever
Even cold November rain
Don't ya think that you need somebody
Don't ya think that you need someone
Everybody needs somebody
You're not the only one
I neatly fold it and write To my Dark Angel on it and rest it on top of his cigarettes. Now I have to go make shit up with Erin
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