Categories > Celebrities > Guns n' Roses > Through The Eyes Of...

I don't want to Forget You

by MaryJaneSixx 0 reviews


Category: Guns n' Roses - Rating: R - Genres: Romance - Warnings: [V] [X] [R] - Published: 2017-06-29 - 1605 words


When the elevator doors open on our floor everyone surges for the doors.; everyone except Nikki. He just stands there, still laughing like a psychopath and blocking Izzy's way out of the elevator which means he's blocking mine, Axl's, and Duff's way out of the elevator too. Izzy's still in full on fight mode though and he violently shoves Nikki into the opposite wall and strolls out of the elevator while Nikki tries to extract himself from Doc's flailing arms. The rest of us follow Izzy out into the hallway where hell immediately breaks loose. Everyone's yelling at each other and I hear Alan first yelling at Izzy about where he got the gun to which Izzy answers "From my pants dumbfuck; didn't you see me pull it out!" At least he's being sarcastic which beats him going off and threatening to beat the shit out of Alan. "Gimme my gun Axe," Izzy snarls and turns towards Axl.

"Fuck no asshole!" Axl replies loudly. "I'm not giving you this thing back so that you can shoot somebody with it even if it is that crazy piece of shit Sixx! I don't want to have to watch your ass go to jail for him! He should be the one in fucking jail, not you! You're not getting this gun back!" Izzy promptly kicks Axl in the shin and wrenches gun out of his hand and then passes it back to me. What the fuck am I supposed to do with it? Axl of course comes at Izzy like a wild animal yelling about how if Izzy doesn't stop being such an asshole that he's going to be the one doing the shooting. Izzy decks him which then leads to the beginning of another rolling on the floor trying to kill one another fight between the two of them; each of them threatening to kill the other in twisted fucking ways like pulling the other's brains out through their nose while they're still alive. How does this shit even get into Axl's head? Izzy informs him that before that happens he'll make a bullet ball, just like the one he and Nikki used to blow up the tree in our front yard, tape the ball to Axl's nuts, and then shoot at it the same way he did the one in the tree and effectively blow Axl's junk right off of his body.

Before they actually hit the floor though Alan, Duff, and I manage to pull them apart. Nikki's still laughing hysterically from the elevator where he's leaning against the door, preventing it from closing. Nikki looks at Duff and says "You know what else I like? Curly haired brunettes, especially really young ones." Duff releases his hold on Axl and Izzy elbows Alan in the ribs and he and Duff are on Nikki before I can even blink. Duff drags Nikki out of the elevator by the collar of his shirt and goddamn if Izzy doesn't have a switchblade in his pocket which is suddenly pressed against Nikki's throat. Duff's yelling in Nikki's face that if he lays a hand on anyone in this band he's dead gun or no gun that he'll kill Nikki with his bare hands. Izzy hisses something none of us can hear over Duff's yelling into Nikki's ear and Nikki starts laughing like a fucking hyena again. "Ok that's enough of this shit!" Alan yells. "Doc, get that crazy fucker upstairs before anyone kills him!"

"I say we let Izzy castrate him first," Duff growls and Izzy smirks and then the knife is pressed into Nikki's crotch and it's apparently hurting because Nikki squeals and grabs Izzy's hair which gets the knife pushed even further into his nuts. Nikki's suddenly pulled backwards into the elevator by Doc who promptly pushes the button to close the doors but we can still hear him yelling at Nikki until the elevator moves too far up for sound to travel anymore. Duff kicks the elevator door in frustration and is pulled back by Mandy.

Izzy however just goes fucking ballistic and tries to make for the stairs but is blocked by Alan and me. "Izzy, stop," I plead with him and grab his face with both of my hands so that he can't look at anything but me. "He's gone, he's gone and he's not coming back, not tonight, ok? If you go after him we're all gonna go after him and somebody's going to get arrested and Sixx always weasles out of that shit; it'll be all of us who go to jail. I'm gonna let go and when I do you're not going to run, ok?"

Izzy slumps down into himself and shoves Alan's hands off of him and snarls "Don't fucking touch me!"

Alan steps back and puts his hands up. "Fine with me, I'm not touching you man as long as you stay down here. Just settle the fuck down!" Alan commands. Fuck, wrong thing to say to a pissed off Izzy.

"Fuck you Alan! It's your fault we're on tour with these bastards! You're the one who arranged the contracts so deal with the consequences!" Izzy yells.

"The consequences can't be you killing Nikki or anyone else! I know you want him dead and you have every right to but you can't actually kill him!" Alan tries to reason. But something in Izzy just snaps and he turns around and punches a hole in the wall but it must not be enough because he goes on a full on tirade of rage down the hall throwing trashcans and kicking more holes in the walls.

Alan looks at Axl like he clearly expects him to do something but Axl just shrugs and says "He's not my problem anymore." Another wrong answer.

Izzy looks up and I can see even more fury in his eyes. He turns to Axl and snarls "Yeah well you're not my problem anymore either. Sorry I was such a bother to you for all those years. Don't worry I'll never be your your junkie piece of shit problem again. Fuck off asshole! Why don't you and Duff go fuck again? Seems to make you two feel better about what screw ups you are! Just get the fuck out of here; I don't even want to look at you right now! The tow of you are nothing but an abusive assholes and a liars and I don't even want to see your faces right now! Just go!"

"Whatever fucker," Axl sighs and turns and walks back to his room. Duff's face crumples and my heart aches to see the look on his face but I can't do anything about it and I don't know what I'd want to do anyway. Mandy saves me and gently pulls Duff away from the rest of us and down the hall.

Then Alan looks at me to do something. What Izzy needs is to rage it out and be left alone. "Just go Alan, I tell him, "let him be."

"Fine, just get him to stop," he snaps before he heads to his own room.

When everyone's gone I turn to Izzy who's just knocked over the last trashcan in the hallway and is standing over it panting. There are holes up and down the hallway where Izzy kicked the walls in "Izzy?" I say quietly, not moving towards him. I know he doesn't want to be touched until it's ready. He looks up at me and his eyes are full of tears that quickly spill over and run down his face.

"I can't fucking do it Slash! I can't be around him like this; and Tommy, I don't think I can stand even looking at him! What the fuck am I going to do?" Izzy asks desperately, trying to hold back sobs.

"I don't know baby; whatever you need though I'm here for you." I tell him quietly. He just nods and drops his head and a sob escapes him. I pull him over to me by his hands and then wrap my arms around him. He just sags into me and buries his face in my hair and cries. I just rub his back and talk to him quietly until he gets a hold of himself and the sobs stop. "Come on baby, lets get out of the hallway."

Izzy lets me pull him into the room and he slumps down on the bed. He pulls a fold of heroin out of his pocket and a spoon and syringe out of his jacket. In less than two minutes he has the needle in his vein and sighs in relief;collapsing back onto the bed. I take the needle out of his arm and cook up my own hit and lay down next to him; both of us halfway to heaven. "Slash?" he asks quietly.

"Yeah baby?" I answer.

"I just want to forget; I want to forget everything, everything but you," he sighs. I open my arms to him and he scoots over into them. "I love you," he mumbles.

"I love you too Izz. Just relax and don't think about anything bad. Just think about here and now. All I want to think about is holding you," I tell him and kiss his forehead. He smiles and nuzzles into my neck and I keep my arms around him and run my hand gently up and down his back. Within a few minutes he nods out and my last thought before I follow him into slumber is that I'm glad I'm the only thing he wants to remember.
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