Categories > Celebrities > Motley Crue > Clandestine

An Empty Paradise

by MaryJaneSixx 0 reviews


Category: Motley Crue - Rating: R - Genres: Romance - Warnings: [V] [X] - Published: 2017-07-20 - 1267 words

An Empty Paradise

Tommy's POV

I open my eyes and see blonde tresses of hair draped over my chest. A sigh escapes me wishing they were black. She smells like lilacs and my nose craves the smell of stale booze, cigarettes, and sweat. My heart sank. This wasn't Nikki. This was my fucking wife. This was my honeymoon. I look down at the fucking ring on my finger. For once I look at it and see it the same way Nikki did when he hesitated to give it to me at the wedding. This marked me as hers. But I wasn't hers. I could never be hers. Nikki had my soul and whatever there may have been of a heart left.

I sigh dragging myself gently out from under Heather. I reach for my smokes and stroll over to the window butt naked as I light one. I look out the window at blue skies, blue water, palm trees and snow white sand. There's a beautiful paradise outside my window. Beautiful, but it may as well have been a rainy dark dirty alley in West Hollywood. I just wasn't paradise without Nikki.

I was worried about him. God he was so fucking out of it at my wedding. His skin had turned a yellowish green and it scared the shit out of me. He looked like all those homeless junkies that used to lurk in the shadows begging for change down on Sunset. God I hope he pulled it together. I was terrified of going home to news that the stupid fuck was dead.

I take a deep drag from my cigarette and run a hand through my wild hair. Come on baby, hold it together for me. I'm coming back for you. I promise. I miss you and love you so much. Just one more week and we'll be together again. Just seven days until I can feel you in my arms again. I'm so empty without you. I can't even make love to Heather without imagining you. I got it so bad for you baby I couldn't even cum until she was doggie style so I didn't have to see her face. I've discovered it's pretty easy to imagine an ass as anyone. And her blonde fucking hair...I just want to grab a magic marker and make it the color of yours. When she says my name during sex I just want to cup a hand over her mouth to silence her because your voice is the only voice I want to hear.

“Tommy,” I hear Heather stirring from the bed.

I turn to look at her as I exhale.

“That smoke smells awful,” she wrinkles her nose.

“Sorry baby, I should have went outside. I'll put it out.” I say snuffing it out. I hesitate a moment before crossing the room to her. I pull a smile out of myself and sit at the edge of the bed. I lean in to give her a kiss.

She quickly covers her mouth, “I haven't brushed yet.”

I sigh and move back. “Um...I need to go send a telegram.”

“A telegram? To who?” She asks me.

“To Nikki.”

She tisked and rolls her eyes. “I think he can live without you for a couple of weeks.”

I nod, “I know...I'm just a little worried about him. I mean you saw him at our wedding.”

“You can't help a junkie,” she shakes her head at me.

I feel the heat of rage briefly sweep my veins. “Don't call him some junkie. He's my best fucking friend...and band leader.”

“How does that guy lead anything?” She asks me with a smirk and I want so badly to smack it off her face.

“Sixx ain't always like he was at the wedding. That's why I'm worried,” I say sliding into some pants.

“Baby you wore those clothes yesterday,” she says to me.

“It don't matter, I'm just going to the front desk.”

“Your hair is a mess,” She points at it.

Seriously Nikki. I miss you. I miss us. You never tell me to put on clean clothes or brush my hair. Everything with her feels like a lie. It's you I need. The one who doesn't tell me I better not do drugs. You never tell me I've had too much to drink.

“Like I said, I'm just going to the front desk for like five fucking minutes.”

“Language please,” she says with a smile. “But baby you have to remember the cameras.”

I furrow my brows and stand up to look at her. “Fuck the fucking cameras!”


“No, there is no discussion here! I'm going to the front desk. I'll be right back.”

“If you care so much about Nikki Sixx you should have married him!” I hear her snapping just as I slam the door shut.

Great now I'm causing a fucking fight on my honeymoon in fucking paradise. But it's a flawed paradise without him. I can't be here with Heather playing the doting new husband when I'm so worried about Nikki. I have to know he's ok. God whew was he? I prayed like hell he was in a pile of Slash's hair and hips deep in Izzy. At least he wouldn't be all alone. Nikki's no good alone. He needs someone there with him to keep him from stepping over the edge. Maybe I should send telegrams to Slash and Izzy too and ask them to look after Nikki. Keep him alive.
This is probably a futile effort, they're both junkies too. But Stradlin seems to hold his shit together. Maybe I can count on one of them to keep him going until I can come home to him.

I walk to the front desk. “Hi, I need to send a telegram,” I smile.

“Sure, and it's to?” They ask grabbing the form.

“Nikki Sixx...11654 Canyon Drive, Van Nuys, California.”

“And the message sir?”

I clear my throat and stare at the counter. “Don't you fucking die on me. I'll see you in seven days.”

“Yes sir, is that all?”

“Yeah I nod.”

“And it's from?”

I shake my head, “Trust me, he'll know.” I turn to leave but pause, “And could you connect me to America?”

“Sure,” they nod and sit a phone on the countertop dialing all sorts of numbers first. I dial the rest.

It rings several times with no answer. How many time zones were between here and LA. Just as I was preparing what I was going to say to Stradlin's machine when he picked up.



“Maybe, who the fuck is this?” He asks on the defensive.

“It's Tommy,” I reply so glad I reached him.

“Oh,” is all I hear with a sigh, “suppose you must be looking for Nikki huh?”

“Yeah, have you seen him?” I eagerly ask.

“Yeah, matter of a fact, he's passed out in my bed as we speak...And T-Bone, I don't mean that to sound like it sounds. I'm not fucking with you or anything. Nor did I fuck him...Me and Slash found him face first behind the Cathouse. He was od'ing I think. Gave him a cold shower and some coke and he came to a bit...then he passed out. Don't worry, he's still breathing. He's with me...I'll keep an eye on him.”

A tear rolls down my cheek. “Thank you Izzy.”

“Egh...It's cool man, have a nice honeymoon,” Izzy says just before hanging up on me.

Thank god he was ok. Thank god Izzy and Slash found him.
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