FicWad

(5.4)

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"/He's not the one who loves me."/

Sakura came out of the Otogakure, wearing a red hoodie, black capri jeans and her old pair of red converse.

…

She looked around the parking area and saw no sign of Sasori or his motorcycle.

['It's not like I can blame him.']

She sighed.

Sakura moved towards the sidewalk and started on her way.

Without stopping, she looked back upon hearing the front door of the establishment barged open and saw Sasuke – who was now wearing his tunic – walked out.

She realized that he hasn't spotted her yet so she quickly hid behind the street post.

['Eh?! Why am I hiding?']

She came out of hiding and found him surveying the parking area.

['Is he looking for me?']

She noticed that Sasuke was about to turn towards her and immediately jumped behind the post again.

['I can't do it after all.']

She adjusted her position as he came by, making sure she won't be seen.

['If I talk to him now, I'll only end up wanting to be comforted by him.']

Sasuke stepped into the street to look as far as his eyes allowed him. He checked both sides.

['And… if he does comfort me, I'll just end up questioning my resolve again.']

Sasuke took out his phone and dialed a number. He held the phone to his ear as he walked back towards the building.

Seeing as Sasuke was busy making a call, Sakura slipped away.

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Sakura sighed and slowed down as soon as she was far enough from the establishment.

She then paid more attention to her surroundings and realized that she had walked into the not so reputable part of the area.

She awkwardly made her way passed insensible men who were either picking up women or being invited by some that were less than decently clad.

She caught a drunken old man's attention and he suddenly approached her, "Excuse me? Are you-?"

Sakura panicked and quickly ran away from the man.

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['W-What the heck!']

Sakura slowed down when she realized that the old man wasn't going to come after her. She was breathing unevenly as she walked on all the way to the end of the street.

['Sasori no baka!']

She turned at the corner, stomping.

['I know he's mad at me but… how could he just leave me alone like this?']

Sakura halted and lowered her head.

['Even though… I was the one who got myself in this situation in the first place.']

"Sakura!"

Sakura turned her head towards a familiar car that had just made a stop.

"Nurse Rin?! I- W-What are you doing here?"

"Nothing much really. Just out for a drive.", Rin smiled at her. "So, need a lift?"

"I-If it's okay with you?"

"Hop in."

"Thank you.", said Sakura as she opened the door.

Rin – who was wearing a black and blue checkered dress-shirt and leggings – picked up her black coat sitting on the passenger seat so Sakura could settle in.

She threw it into the backseat while Sakura shut the car door close. She then put her car into gear and drove off.

"You live outside the town proper right?"

"Yes but… dropping me off my bus stop will be fine."

"Are you sure? I don't mind driving you all the way to your house."

"Yes."

"O-Okay." Rin seemed disinclined. "The bus stop in front of the convenience store just a few blocks from the school wasn't it?"

"Yes. That's the one."

"By the way … why were you walking along that street all on your own at this hour?", wondered Rin.

"Oh I just got off work. Ah but, not exactly there! I'm working at this open mic bar, on the other side of the street."

"So I heard."

"Y-You knew? Did you hear from Ino?"

"Yes. From Ino. And Karin. And Kakashi and Naruto and-"

"R-Right. Of course you know everyone."

Rin nodded. "But, what I really meant was; why were you alone? I thought your- Oh, he's not your boyfriend yet, right? I'm Sorry. Sasori was it now? I thought that he picks you up after work."

"Oh. You knew that too?"

"S-Sorry. Was I not supposed to? Back then you didn't seem to mind us talking about him."

Sakura shook her head. "No. It's okay. I supposed it wasn't really much of a secret, huh?"

"So, why didn't he pick you up tonight?"

Sakura looked out the window, "He had to be somewhere else. H-He… preferred to be somewhere else."

"Did something happen?"

Sakura leaned back roughly. She then started rubbing the palm of her hands down her face. "We were fine one moment and then he was suddenly walking away in the next. I know that he had somewhere to go but… he just… left without even saying goodbye to me. And I was just there… standing right in front of him."

"Oh. Well, d-don't you have a clue as to why he might've done that?"

"Er… S-Sasuke-kun.", Sakura concluded.

Rin blinked her eyes away from the road and towards Sakura

"Uchiha? Why him? What exactly happened?"

"Well, at first Sasori seemed like he was having fun. I even told him the good news; … that I… confronted Sasuke-kun and asked him about the girl we saw him with."

"Eh?!"

"Oh, right. You wouldn't know Nurse Rin. The thing is… the possibility of Sasuke-kun having a girlfriend had been occupying my mind for a while now and I just recently had him admit to it."

"He… confirmed it?" Rin turned to look at her.

"Well, he said that, she's… someone he… /adores/."

"I… see. But… what is it about him upsets your- err… Sasori?"

Sakura sighed and looked out of the window again. "Sasuke performed on stage tonight."

"What's it got to do with-"

"He dedicated this beautiful song to his 'special person'."

"And~"

"I cried."

Rin fell silent.

"I couldn't help it.", Sakura said passively. "I didn't even know that I was crying until he was done singing."

"Uhm. I'm confused. Why would Sakura's- Why would he be upset over you being moved by someone's performance?"

"I wasn't moved. I was devastated, hearing him dedicate sweet words to a girl that... isn't me.", Sakura admitted.

"Sakura." Rin looked at her with concern this time.

"I shed my tears for the boy who wasn't even aware that he broke my heart in front of the boy who likes me-"

"Whoops!" Rin made an abrupt stop, causing Sakura to jerk forward.

"Oh my- Sakura?! Are you okay?! I'm sorry!", she apologized as she took a right turn.

"I'm… okay." Sakura straightened herself. "What happened?"

"I almost miss the turn… and…"

"Is everything okay?"

"Obviously not.", Rin told her. "I'm suddenly feeling very depress right now. I thought that you actually treated me as your friend. I'm sad to learn that you were going through such a problem all along but you couldn't confide in me. Now, I feel like I'm a failure as an adult and as a friend."

"It's not like that at all. It was sort of… complicated.", reasoned Sakura. "Besides, I was in denial until only recently. And it doesn't even matter anymore. Ino was right anyway. It was convenient for me to be attracted to someone else at the time because I was longing for Sasori. I was well aware of how unfair it was to the both of them which is why I had never intended to pursue my feelings for Sasuke-kun right from the start. I chose Sasori!", Sakura said painfully, gripping the hem of her hoodie.

"I went to Sasuke-kun to have my heart broken once and for all. So I can finally move on and start over with Sasori but… I couldn't hide it from him. Letting Sasuke-kun go and accepting the fact that he already loves someone else… is hurting me. And now Sasori is hurting because of me."

Sakura started bawling her eyes out. "I want to tell him I'm sorry. I want to fix things. I want to make it up to him. But… what if he doesn't want to speak to me again?"

"F-From my experience…", Rin considered for a moment.

Sakura looked at her expectantly.

"It's best to give him and yourself time to cope up with the hurt.", said Rin. "Don't use him to get over your heartbreak. Even if you had picked him right from the very beginning, if you go to him now, it will only look like you're choosing him because Uchiha isn't an option for you anymore."

"…"

"Give it time. If you two really love each other then everything will eventually be okay. Ne?"

Sakura looked down and began wiping her cheeks dry with her hands.

"I- er… I think I have some tissues somewhere inside my coat pocket.", Rin reached back for her coat and handed it to Sakura. "H-Here Sakura. Go ahead… and take it out of… whichever pocket."

"Thank you." Sakura inspected the black coat until she found the tissues.

"Say, my apartment is actually near this area. Do you want to come over? Give yourself time to calm down? Freshen up?"

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Rin opened her door and invited Sakura inside.

"Come in.", she told her, as she held the door open.

"Then, pardon my intrusion.", said Sakura, walking into the Genkan first.

Rin closed the door behind her. She then removed her black ankle boots before stepping off of the tataki.

Sakura also removed her shoes and followed Rin through the kitchen area.

"Bathroom's here. Go ahead. Make yourself at home.", Rin told her, pointing at a door.

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Sakura peeked inside and immediately noticed that there were two sets of toothbrushes, towels and bathrobes.

"There are fresh towels inside the mirrored cabinet if you need them."

"Thank you.", said Sakura as she closed the bathroom door.

She walked towards the vanity then proceeded to wash her face.

…

After washing her face, Sakura took a fresh towel out from the cabinet and began drying her face.

When she was done, she made a move to place the used towel into the hamper. That's when she inhaled a familiar scent coming from the pile of laundry.

Sakura took a whiff.

['Smells like Sasuke-kun's-']

Sakura inspected the cabinets and found a similar bottle of cologne that she once saw Sasuke had.

['I knew it. Nurse Rin's boyfriend uses the same cologne Sasuke-kun uses.']

Sakura smiled painfully.

['Of course I've got his scent memorized.']

…

/"It's quite a popular brand for men but its only available here in Rinnegan."/

…

['Sasuke-kun, he really did like common things. He tried his best not to stand out. Always keeping his distance too.']

…

/"You know... I keep forgetting that you're one of the kids born with a silver spoon … I mean, you live in a dorm where you have to share a room with someone. You work at night, waiting tables. You take the bus. You wear simple clothes. And then all of a sudden... you bring me here and... I was just reminded that you're 'the' Uchiha Sasuke."

/"And how should I take that comment?"/

/"As a compliment!"/

/"Very well."/

…

['How could someone who made such an effort to be inconspicuous managed to still catch people's attention? How could someone so distant and stoic cause such warmth in my heart? Then pain.']

Sakura stared at her reflection.

['Seriosly?! Is everything supposed to be a reminder of him now? I'm trying to move on here you know. Just how much have you affected me?']

"Sakura?", Rin suddenly called. "You okay in there?"

"Y-Yeah.", she answered. "I'll be out soon."

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The two girls sat down by the low table. Rin had prepared some snacks and was pouring some juice on the glasses.

"So, you live here with your boyfriend?", noted Sakura .

Rin was flustered, spilling some juice. "I- I'm not a little girl anymore after all."

"Oh. Of course! I didn't mean anything wrong." Sakura waved her hand. "I just felt guilty for intruding on your home. I hope he doesn't mind me being here now."

"He's not here right now so you don't need to worry.", Said Rin as she got up.

"Is he at work?"

"Maybe." Rin walked towards the kitchen. "But, what I mean is that, he doesn't exactly live here. He does come over sometimes but most of the time he goes home to his house."

"He has a house? How come he didn't ask you to move in and live with him instead?"

Rin came back carrying a cloth. "It's technically not his house. He had to move in there to live with… a relative."

"Oh. Well why don't he just move in here with you?", asked Sakura.

"It's complicated.", said Rin as she started wiping the spill on the table.

"I see."

['I probably shouldn't press.']

Sakura picked up her glass and drank a few sips from it. "B-By the way, I just remembered I still haven't thank you for proofreading my revision on Sasori's practice thesis."

"Right. The one Uchiha brought to me."

"Directly? He didn't ask Karin to hand it for me?"

"Uhm, no. He personally came to me."

"Oh. Well anyway… Thank you very much."

"Don't mention it. It was actually very interesting to read. How did it go then?"

"Well… he couldn't use it in the end…"

"How come?"

Sakura shrugged. "He did say it help him figure out where direction he wanted to go with his design. And in the end he finished on time so~."

"Hm. That's great, I supposed."

Sakura nodded. "That's all that matters anyway. I was able to help him as much as I can."

['That's right. Sasori's is all that matters. He's the only one I need to please.']

…

/"Your parents didn't even pretend to be happy about the results of the finals, did they? … Don't worry about it Sakura. I mean, what's new, right?"

/"Y-Yeah."/

/"No point in being upset over that. You just focus on beating the Hyuuga kid and I'm sure everything will eventually work out."/

…

['Even though…']

…

/"...You once told me that you can't bring yourself to run away from your home even if your parents didn't understand you. That's because you love them and you do want them to understand you. You do want them to be proud of you."/

…

['No. I have to stop comparing Sasori to Sasuke-kun because…

No matter how much kindness he shows me…

He's not the one who loves me.

And I don't want to keep Sasori just because I can't have Sasuke-kun.

I want to keep Sasori because he's the guy that…

I… He's the guy that I… l-

That I…

…']

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"Are you sure you're going to be fine right here?", Rin asked Sakura.

"Yes. Thank you and sorry for your trouble.", said Sakura as she was getting down from the car.

"Uhm, Want me to wait until a bus gets here?"

"That won't be necessary. Well. Good night." Sakura closed the car door then moved away from the vehicle.

She walked towards the bench. She looks back and wonders why Rin hasn't left yet but then she realized that the nurse was on her phone.

She spotted the arriving bus a few blocks away.

When the bus made the stop, Rin finally started her engine."

Sakura waved at her before getting on the bus.

As soon as she found herself a seat, she flopped down and noticed Rin's car driving away.

…

/"It's best to give him and yourself time to cope up with the hurt. … Don't use him to get over your heartbreak. Even if you had picked him right from the very beginning, if you go to him now, it will only look like you're choosing him because Uchiha isn't an option for you anymore… Give it time. If you two really love each other then everything will eventually be okay. Ne?"/

…

['Yeah. That's right. I need time to get over Sasuke-kun. And I need to give Sasori time to heal as well.']

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"Tell me Ino. How did you manage to get over your infatuations for Sasuke-kun?", asked Sakura as she lost herself staring at the morning glories.

"Hm~ I can't exactly say how or when I got over him. I just woke up one morning and realized that I wasn't as into him as much as I once was, I guess.", said Ino as she was watering the Irises.

Sakura moved away from the morning glories. Donning a peach sundress, she walked over to the hydrangea flowers.

"While I did find him undeniably handsome, the idea of wanting to date him came to me only because most of the girls in school thought that I look good with him the best. No one wanted to see him end up dating an 'undeserving' girl, so everyone agreed that if they were eventually gonna have their hearts broken by him, it would be to a girl that they can bare seeing him with. It seemed to be a reasonable idea at the time.", Ino added.

"I honestly can't even tell anymore if I did it to humor our classmates or if I just wanted to go with what everyone else thought would be best or if I actually harboured a deep feeling of love towards Sasuke."

Sakura turned around to look at Ino who had just finished caring for the Irises.

Ino stood up and straightened her apron.

"But one thing I do know is that at some point I realized that I did not want to be a part of a perfectly good-looking couple. I want to fall in love for real. I want to meet someone who's going to sweep me off my feet and make my heart skip a beat.", Ino continued. "But it's been so hard, since my first crush just happened to be a 'ten out of ten' guy.", she giggled.

Sakura smiled at her. "I know right."

"Sakura." Ino suddenly turned serious. "I want you to experience that as well?"

"Hm?"

"I know I've been very invasive when it comes to your relationship with Sasori. I know I've had a huge influence in your decisions over the years and I feel really guilty. I value our friendship the most. I would do anything to protect the both of you. Of course I'd be happy if the two of you ended up together but …

I don't want either one of you to give up on your happiness. And I especially don't want either one of you to put yourself in a situation that you'll end up regretting someday.

I guess what I'm trying to say is… I want you to be happy and be with someone that will make you fall in love for real. You deserve to be happy. You deserve to love and be love. And… So does Sasori.", Ino told Sakura with a smile.

"…"

"I don't want either one of you to hinder one another of the chance to find someone that will truly love each one of you."

"Ino."

"I love you Sakura no matter what. I'll always be your friend. Same goes for Sasori. Neither of you will be completely left alone so~"

The bell chimes.

Both girls turned their heads to look at the door.

Ino moved towards the incoming customer.

Sakura exhaled heavily as soon as Ino walks away from her.

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"Welcome~!"

Sakura and Suigetsu smiled at the woman who gestured at them as they entered the store. They wore jackets over their uniforms.

"Sorry you're the one who had to come along with me Sakura.", Suigetsu apologized as he pulled out a shopping cart. "Sasuke and I usually does the shopping and he makes sure we get everything restock before he takes the day off but I guess we miscalculated. There are more customers nowadays. It's summer after all."

"I don't really mind. I needed to get away from the bar for a while anyway.", Sakura smiled as she walked along Suigetsu towards the aisles. "Besides, it was either me or Karin. Everyone agreed that it's for the best if I went with you instead."

"Yeah. Thank the heavens; I didn't have to run this errand with her."

Suigetsu turned the cart and Sakura followed him.

"What are you still mad at her for? It wasn't her fault Sasuke-kun made her believe that your cardigan was his."

"I've already forgotten about that." Suigetsu took a couple bottles of mirin from the shelf.

Sakura went for the rice vinegar and the soy sauce. "Then what do you have against Karin?"

"I just can't stand her. The way she clings to Sasuke pisses me off."

The both of them placed the items into the cart and moved on to the next aisle.

"Hm~."

"What?!" Suigetsu raised an eyebrow at her while he was picking out some potato starch.

"Are you perhaps jealous?", wondered Sakura. "Ne, Suigetsu? Do you… like Sauke-kun too?"

"It's not like that!", Suigetsu wrinkled his forehead. "I respect the guy a lot. I can't stand girls who look at Sasuke like he's just some /piece of meat/. He's a really sensitive guy, you know? He acts tough and tries too hard to be cool but the truth is, his heart is extremely fragile."

"You were taken by Sasuke-kun as well, huh?", Sakura smiled softly.

"I meant what I said from the bottom of my heart but when you say it like that, it suddenly makes me feel uncomfortable."

Sakura giggled.

"Hey I'm serious here you know."

"Hai, hai." Sakura turned serious. "But just so you know, Karin loves Sasuke-kun sincerely. She's just really… awkward when it comes to expressing it."

"Awkward?!", Suigetsu picked up three packs of his chosen brand and placed it inside the cart. "More like bitchy."

"Hey! She's a good girl who happens to be seriously in love with Sasuke-kun. She wants nothing more than to see Sasuke-kun smile."

"That's… good to know, I… supposed."

"You look unhappy. Are you scared she'll end up taking Sasuke-kun away from you?"

"Like I said, it's not like that at all! I'm not jealous of that girl!", he blurted out.

"Then~ Are you jealous of Sasuke-kun?", she teased.

Suigetsu deadpanned. "You're starting to sound like Tayuya and Kin Tsuchi."

"But… it's so obvious.", Sakura giggled.

"You're one to talk."

"Eh?!"

Suigetsu smirked.

"I have no idea what you're talking about." Sakura tried to play it cool as she walked towards the flours on display.

"You just confirmed it yourself a while ago."

"What are you talking about?", she turned back to Suigetsu holding some panko packages.

"You said /'too'/."

"Huh?!"

"A while ago, you asked if I like Sasuke /too/."

"I- I-" Sakura was flustered.

"Don't worry. I sort of understand the situation. I won't tell anyone else… or him. Although, he probably already has a clue-"

"Yes! He probably does but... we agreed to be friends so~"

"Really?"

Sakura nodded.

Suigetsu scratched the back of his head. "I get it. Cat in the box, right? And you want to keep it that way?"

"Yes. As long as I don't say it out loud, I don't need to confirm or deny it with him and Sasuke-kun doesn't need to accept or reject it." Sakura smiled weakly. "Although, it's pretty obvious that I'll end up getting rejected since he already has a girlfriend."

"He does?", Suigetsu seemed shock.

"Didn't you know?", Sakura wondered. "I thought you were covering for him back then."

…

/"By the way, Sasuke stepped out for a while. If Orochimari-san looks for him, just tell him he's taking a ten."/

…

"No. I wasn't aware…"

Sakura thought she saw someone familiar from the corner of her eye.

['Is that's nurse Rin.']

"Sakura?"

"Uh, sorry. I think I saw someone I know. Give me a sec?"

"Okay."

Sakura quickly laid the packages on the cart and ran off.

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