Categories > TV > Doctor Who
- Overall I’d say it’s not a “/bad/“ story— the dialogue is true to the characters’ personalities and the spacing of events (coffee shop to TARDIS disappearance to River’s arrival) was fair for the most part— it just didn’t seem to have a point.
The beginning of the story was vague about the exact circumstances preceding these events and it seems if it was relevant to mention when in the Doctor’s timeline this story is set, it could at least be clear.
Furthermore, the grammar was a bit patchy, and by that I’m referring to the lack of capitalization in some of the names, the sentence fragments, and the misspellings (where instead of were, looker rather than looked).
I feel as though the Doctor was somewhat OOC, as she was unusually dramatic about the TARDIS’s vanishing act (she didn’t really try to find out what had happened before giving in to despair and even that was exaggerated) and when she met River I don’t think they had enough time together. I’d really rather see another section added where they talk over some things or just try to catch up a little because the fervent kissing and immediate departure thereafter doesn’t cut it for me.
In conclusion, this has the potential to be a brief, yet passionately spoken story if just a little more attention is directed towards its details.
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