Categories > Cartoons > Family Guy

Terror House

by narwhalpuppy 1 review

The Griffins are having the time of their lives playing a game of pool at the Drunken Clam. Lois gets a night to herself, then she has to contend with sadistic robbers.

Category: Family Guy - Rating: PG-13 - Genres: Humor - Warnings: [V] - Published: 2019-07-05 - 4336 words - Complete

Family Guy Presents

A Narwhal Puppy Production

Terror House

As Peter and his family are headed to the Drunken Clam. Lois was excited to have a night to herself.
"Have fun at the pool game you guys. Hope you win Peter!" Peter leaves the house with Chris, Meg, Brian and Stewie. "All right Lois! Don t bring home any gentleman callers". Said Peter. "I won't as long as you don't get all too roaring drunk" .

Meg was none to happy to be Going to a pool contest at the Drunken Clan with her family of all people. Oh! Why do I have to go to a stupid pool game with a bunch of drinks when I could be at Connie D'Amicos party"! Meg bemoaned.

"Shut up Meg! " shouted Peter.

"Still thinking about that fairy tale aren't you, Meg!" Said Lois joining in. "I heard that line of The Fugitive when Kimble told Gerard about the one armed man." laughs Chris.

"Tell me about it. Meg is more annoying than a a whale who can't get a good sleep!" Peter said.

Cutaway Scene:

A whale is in the ocean trying to sleep on his bed. A bunch of fish were partying next door. The whale gets out of bed. "I'll put a stop to this!" The whale swims over to the fish and yells, "Some of us have to work in the morning! Stop that (beep)ing noise!" Then some fish who were policemen came and arrested the whale. "Hey! Hey! Why are you arresting me for!" protested the whale! It's them! It's them!"

The burglars were outside with their leader who was using binoculars to spy on the Griffins. Their names were Zippy, Knuckles, Creeper, Slicer, Stabber, and Butch.

"When the hell is that (beep) buffoon gonna leave?". said Butch " At least we scoped out the place last night while these losers were sleeping. " replies Stabber.

"We will attack at dawn, Red Dawn!" said Knuckles. "No we attack tonight when the dame least expects it! " said Zippy. "Oh all right." added Slicer.

Brian tells Lois, "Do whatever you want but be sure to stay safe. Especially since you're here alone at night." " Don't worry I don't think anything will happen. " Lois assures them. Lois kisses Stewie goodbye, "Be a good boy and mind your daddy!"

Stewie spews, "Little does she know I got drunk there once!" Peter and the rest all walk out the front door. "Bye now!" Chris was ecstatic to be going to the Drunken Clam with Peter, "Oh boy! Headed to a bar with my dad! Maybe he'll let me drink!"

Peter whispers to Chris, "I'll sneak you a beer during the pool game!"

Lois was alone. "Ahhhh. Alone at last! This time I won't go on a cleaning spree!". Lois ponders what she should do, "What can I do first? I know! A shower!"

Lois decides to take a shower, she didn't know the robbers were stalking her.

"Rape bait!". spouts Knuckles. "It's like I'm watching a real life (beep) porno up close!" said Creeper.

Peter, Brian, Stewie, Chris and Meg were all at the Clam. "We have arrived!". Peter cheers. Joe, Cleveland and Quagmire all applaud him. Quagmire comes up to Meg, "Hi Meg! Are you ready to have fun today?" " I'm here against my will not that anyone asked me." Meg moped.

Brian steps in, "Just be ready for me to pick your ass Quagmire." "In your dreams, Brian, you self righteous son of a bitch"!

Joe announces, "Lets all play some pool! 8 ball corner pocket!"

Stewie squeals in delight. "Its going to be absolutely delicious to see a bunch of drunken men make complete asses of themselves!"

Back at the Griffin house, Lois gets out of the shower. "Sure is nice to have the house to myself!"

Getting dressed into her night shirt and going over to the living room couch Lois wonders, "What should I do now?" She was unaware of the dangers lurking outside the Griffin house. "I can do all the things I wanted to do without Peter around!" The robbers make their way to the front door.

"Oh this is it! I can just taste the excitement of this!" said Slicer.

"We going to do this or what?" asked Zippy

"Let's just wait for the right time." said Butch.

"Why can't we just go in instead of talking about it? You're like those vampires Kate Beckinsale killed in Van Helsing!" said Knuckles.

Lois was about to do something she wanted to do. "I got it! Think I'll watch some TV." said Lois to herself. She then switches on the TV and puts it on to a music channel. "Nothing like good old Music Choice! I'll play some 80s songs that remind me of when Peter and I were first dating."

At the Drunken Clam, Joe decides to toss a coin to see who'll go first.

"Heads, I go first, tails, Peter goes first, ready?" "Ready as I will ever be." Peter exclaimed. "I'm as ready after I studied to be a rugby coach!"

Cutaway Scene:

Peter as a rugby coach was running around barking orders at the rugby team.

Peter yells at the Rugby team. "Hey! That's out of bounds!" "We're Rugby players, not football players shitface!" shouts one of the rugby team members! The rugby team continued to play as Peter yelled, "Now I remember the terminology! Conversion! Convert! Drop Kick!" Peter then ends up injuring the team one by one by tackling them. Peter says, "I ought to take a lesson or two from Richard Harris in This Sporting Life."

The coin is tossed and lands on heads.

" Looks like me! ". Joe said as he picked up a pool stick. Cleveland stacked the pool bills into the triangle. "You can do this Joe!".

as Joe was about to shoot the pool balls into the pockets, Peter was going to sneeze, "uh....uh.....uh....uh....". Brian says, "Cover your mouth, Peter! "

" Ah-chooooooooo! "

It was too late, Peters sneeze emits a powerful force that made all the pool balls fly from the table landed all over the bar, luckily no real damage was done. Five of the pool balls landed on Megs head.

"Dammit Peter! Look what you did!" Quagmire lambasted. "No worries we'll just pick up the balls and start over! " Cleveland assures.

" You gotta admit it was funny what happened to Meg! " Peter laughs.

" You're right. You're forgiven Peter! " Joe said.

" Can't wait until it's my turn to play so I can kick all your ass! " Stewie said.


Back at the house the robbers were getting into place.

"Right ready?" replied Slicer.

"Ready." replied Knuckles.

Inside the house Lois was sitting on the couch listening to music when suddenly the doorbell rang, Lois turned the TV off, got up and walked over to the door, she then opened it and found one of the robbers standing in the doorframe.

"May I help you?" she asked.

The figure then pulls out a large knife, Lois gasps in horror.

"Oh my God!" exclaimed Lois in fear.

Lois attempts to shove the door shut, however Knuckles forces his way inside and pushes Lois backwards, then Zipper, Slicer, Creeper, Stabber and Butch all come in at once. All were wearing similar clothes charge in and Lois attempts to fight, but is pushed back against the wall, the main figure aiming the knife at her throat.

"Who the Hell are you!" shouted Lois fearfully

"We ain't movin' men that's for sure." said Stabber.

Two of the men then grab at Lois's earrings, she tries to keep away, but they grab them and rip her earrings out making her scream in fear, to which the main one placed his hand over her mouth.

At the Clam, Meg rubs her head. "Knew I shouldn't have come here". "For once in your life, Shut up Meg!" Peter said. Brian finds all the pool balls and this time he stacks them.

"Okay let's begin again. Joe, as you were. ". Brian said. "Or as you wish." Peter giggled. " That's from The Princess Bride, get it? "

Joe readies to shoot the pool balls into their pockets. Wanting to get the right angle, Joe obsessively tries to steady his aim.

Quagmire rolls his eyes, "any day now Joe!"

Joe shouts, "Trying to focus here"! Finally finding the right shot, Joe shoots the pool balls and only a few balls going into the pockets.

"Not bad! Pretty good. " Cleveland complement s. "That better not get made into angle where it's going to lead to a cripple joke" Joe warned.

"It wasn't " I swear. Okay who is next. " Cleveland asks. At the Griffin House.

"Whatever you do, don't hurt me.". Begs Lois.

"Think we're going to listen to you? " shouted Knuckles.

The robbers drag Lois by her feet about while looting the bedrooms.

"Just leave okay. You can end up in prison for this. Don't you know that?" Pleaded Lois.

"Don't think so, bitch! We're just getting started! " said Zippy.

One of the robbers walks up to her and makes kissy sounds.

"You're an attractive one, aren't you" said Slicer!

" Please don't. I'm a married woman! ". Lois begs.

Meanwhile at the Drunken Clam, Quagmire goes up next.

Quagmire laughs, "All riiiiigghhhhht, now it's time to show you how it's done."

Quagmire then plays and shoots a good one, however one of the balls lands near a woman.

Quagmire not knowing what to do, "Oh Great. What now?"

Joe assures him, "Just get it Quagmire, it won't hurt."

Quagmire grins and creeps over behind the woman, he then grabs the ball but the woman turns, spots him, screams in shock and slaps him across the face, causing the others to laugh.

Pete cracks up, "Hey Quagmire you shouldn't try doing that, hehehehehehehehehehehe."

Quagmire grumbled, "Jerk Asses!"

"Where are you taking me?" Yelled Lois.

"A trip to downstairs land! " said Butch.

"What were you expecting? Narnia?" Zippy tells her.

One of the robbers puts on a cd and Chris Isaaks Can't Do A Thing To Stop Me plays. The robbers take turns carrying her over their shoulders.

"Now this is what I call a mosh pit! . said Creeper laughed at the robbers joined in.

"Come on, please! Stop! I didn't do nothing!" Lois begs.

Slicer flirts with her. "Hey baby! Where have you been all my life?"

"Oh oh! My turn! What's your sign! " Stabber said.

Lois horrified yells, "Don't do this please!"

Back at the Clam, Joe is taking his turn.

"Bring it on." he yelled.

Joe then tries but fails, one of the balls smacks into Meg's face and knocks her over.

"Meg watch where you're standing." said Peter.

"Oh that's it," snapped Meg, "It's on."

Meg and Joe then get into a game.

"Hey, no fair." whined Peter, let me do it."

Quagmire observes Meg's behavior, then joins in. "Meg is feeling insulted now. Just like Nick Torres from NCIS when Trump tries to get him deported."

Cutaway Scene:

A bunch of ICE agents show Nick Torres to Donald Trump.

"Here he is Mr. President!" said the ICE agent.

Nick Torres protests, "I am a citizen! I work for the government, The place is called NCIS!"

Donald Trump says, "Nope I don't believe you! You're going to be deported and you'll never be able to get back in the US!!"

Nick Torres was taken to the wall and was going to be sent over.

"Okay, what son of a bitch built this wall?" he asks.

Hanny Manny comes and says, "Well I did! Come on! In you go!"


At the Griffin House, Lois is getting rather fed up with the robbers. "That's it! I've had just about all I can stand!" Lois vows determined to take down the robbers.

Much to the shock of the robbers, Lois actually fights them with her martial arts skills as she was teaching for the phone. Lois yells, "I used to be a black belt once!"

"Who does that bitch ass whore think she is!" asked Stabber.

"She'll pay for this, that's what!" said Slicer.

Lois attempts to call the cops, but fails. The robbers drag her away from the phone. They were mad as shit.

"Trying to squeal on us, huh?" shouted Zipper.

Knuckles suggests, " Since she likes squealing, let's do something from Deliverance to her!"

Creeper disgresses, "Nah, that's too good for her! Let's pile on her!"

"Yeah! " All of them said.

"Stop! Enough of this! " Lois shouts

"Make us!" " Guess what? We won't stop!" implies Butch.

The robbers attack Lois as she screams for mercy.

Back at the Clam, everyone except Brian and Stewie were getting competitive on their game.

Peter: Hehehehehehehehe, I'm gonna beat you.

Quagmire: Yeah right.

Yhe balls are flying everywhere, suddenly one of them hits Brian.

Brian said, "Alright that's it, let me show you how to play."

Brian then starts playing.

Stewie watches, "Oh for God's sake, stop getting obsessed over the game."

Suddenly Stewie gets distracted by all the balls.

"Alright, watch out for Stu." he declared, I'm gonna wipe the floor with you.

"Where next?" asks Zipper

"I know! The conservatory!!" Knuckles said.

The robbers drag Lois to the conservatory.

"We don't have anything of value. So don't bother." Lois begged.

"Bitch! Like we don't know better" said Butch.

"Tell us where the safe is!" demands Slicer.

Lois swears, "We don't have one. Don't hurt me."

the robbers were looking around, Lois sees an opportunity to escape. The robbers see Lois try to get away.

"All right! That's it! this broad is beginning to be a shit with us!" said Knuckles.

Lois is soon cornered by the robbers and they attack her with a claw hammer and taser.

"We're going to tell you one last time! Where's the safe!" said Creeper.

Lois begs again, "There is none. Just leave me alone and have mercy." Lois said.

Over at the Clam the game is getting heated.

"You're going to loose you guys!" cried Peter.

"No we're not." barked Meg.

"Shut up Meg!" said Peter

"You're starting to become a jerk ass Peter." stated Quagmire.

"You lot are just jealous of my skills." snapped Peter. Going into a cutaway Peter says, just like Doug Walker and his brother ignoring the negative feedback on Channel Awesome from fans.

Cutaway Scene:

Doug and Rob Walker were looking at the comments from their Youtube videos.

Rob says, "You might want to take a look at this, Doug."

"Ahh, don't even bother." said Doug.

Rob and Doug then look at the comments.

"Ahhh, so some people hate us." said Rob with concern.

"Nah, that's all right. Just ignore it." said Doug.

"It's getting pretty serious here!" said Rob.

"Just (beep)ing ignore it! Didn't you hear me the first time!" yelled Doug.

The robbers find a box that contained valuables that belonged to Peter.

"What's this bullshit you were telling us there's nothing valuable?" said Butch.

Lois struggles to explain, "Well, it's not what you think...."

"Lair! Bitch! Open it! Now! " shouts Zipper.

Lois says, "Sorry I don't know the password in which to open this".

The robbers then really get upset with her and attack Lois with a taser and one robber was using a knife.

"We're punishing you". screamed Slicer. "What until you meet my friend Slicer Jr!" he said taking out a knife.

Holding her down and giving her cigarette burns Lois screams. Then the robbers use a knife to scalp her. Lois screams for her life. "Why is this happening!" "This is your fault you should've told us what we wanted to hear!" said Knuckles.

Lois shouts, "Stop! I beg of you! stop!

As she was now being attacked Lois then wishes she had joined Peter and the rest at the Clam.


Back at the clam Peter has beaten everyone except Quagmire who's playing against him.

"You won't beat me Quagmire!" declared Peter.

"Dammit Peter stop being confident." retorted Quagmire, "Besides it's just a game."

"It's not just a game," retorted Peter, "It's a competition and Peter's owning the game, yeah that's right me."

Quagmire then manages to beat Peter.

Yeaahhh, hahahahahaha, see Peter, told you I could win."

"No fair, you cheated." pouted Peter.

"He didn't cheat Peter," said Joe, "You're becoming a real jackass you know that."

"Are not." replied Peter.

"Are too." retorted Cleveland.

Back at the Griffin house, the robbers were holding Lois back as they were searching her purse.

Lois pleads, "No no! Don't do this!"

" Hmmm. What goodies are in here I wonder? " said Creeper.

Lois begins, "Get it through your thick heads! I have nothing."

The robbers flirt with Lois.

"Come on hot stuff. You know you want us." whispers Slicer.

"Your name is Lois, correct? What's your last name, Lane? Ha ha! get it! Lois! Lane! " flirts Stabber.

Much to Lois horror the robbers touch her and have more fun with her.

"What can we do next?" asks Butch

" Hey I know! " answers Zippy.

Lois protests, "What're you doing to me!"

The robbers the her hands behind her back then jump on her to rape her. They take off her pants.

Lois, "You're hurting me! Enough!"

"Let's take turns! Whoever can get her to talk wins!" said Knuckles.

"Awesome! You've always been the competitive type, Knuckles!" said Butch.

Over at the Clam Peter is still sulking over loosing.

Joe complies, "Come on Peter, it's just a game."

Peter sobs, "Shut up, I was gonna win."

"You're causing a scene, Peter. Stop this now." said Quagmire.

Peter was growing ruder by the moment. "I'm going to win! Then I'm taking home the gold! Nobody is going to stop me now!" Peter then goes back to the pool table to prove his worth. Just as he is about to get ready to shoot some more balls into the pool slots. Suddenly Ernie the Giant Chicken lands on Peter. "NOT YOU AGAIN!" shouts Peter in astonishment. "I came back for seconds after you barbecued my ass!" squawked Ernie then Peter and Ernie stare at each other one to eye. Ernie and Peter get into one of their usual massive fights.

The fight between Ernie and Peter causes massive damage to the bar. The fight ends with Ernie slipping on a banana peel and Peter throws him out. Everyone cheers. After the fight is over Peter realizes something.

Peter then sees it, "Aww gee those guys were right, it's the taking part that counts in the end."

Peter then goes back to the clam and sees the others waiting their.

Peter walking up to the crowd of his friends, "Hey you guys, look i'm really sorry, you were right it's the taking part that counts."

" Don't worry Peter we forgive you." Quagmire assuring his friend.

"Best fight ever! Dad was awesome! Way better than Pikachu vs Deadpool." Chris boasts.

Cutaway Scene:

In a Pokemon arena, a referee says, "In this corner, the challenger! Pikachu! In this corner, the champion! Deadpool!"

Pikachu and Deadpool take their places in the Pokemon arena, and the referee says, "Show these people what they came here to see! I want a good fight!"

The bell rings, and Pikachu and Deadpool begin their fight. Pikachu uses thunder on Deadpool then he uses his healing powers to absorb Pikachu's shock. Deadpool then uses super human speed and martial arts on Pikachu who dodges all of Deadpool's powers. It ends with Deadpool and Pikachu about to go head to head with each other and a voice over says, "Woah! What a fight! Who will win? Stay tuned! Let's get back to the episode now!"


The robbers were standing over Lois feeling high and mighty.

Lois protests, "Please leave. You already did enough damage already!"

" No! We refuse to stop! "

"We got a lot more to go with our conquest of you!"

"Look! You don't want to do this anymore. Don't you know Rhode island had tough laws against rape and breaking in and entering?"

The robbers start touching and flirting with Lois. Finding some inner strength Lois managed to escape their grip which infuriated the robbers so they beat her then think about killing her.

"Didn't you guys hear a word i said? Stop this!" Cried Lois.

The robbers drag Lois into the kitchen and one of them finds a knife.

"This ought to do the trick!"

" Please! Just let me live! "


Lois escapes their grip again leaving the robbers wanting for more.

Back at the Clam Peter and the others are playing pool again but this time in a friendlier manner.

Meg who tries to be the voice of reason with her father says, "See dad now isn't this more fun."

"Shut up Meg, yeah this is far more fun." Peter spat.

Cleveland then strikes a good one, unfortunately one of the balls smacks Meg in the face knocking her over.

"I spoke to soon." Meg muffles.

Brian butts in, "Come on you guys let's head back, it's getting late and i'm sure Lois won't be happy if Stewie's up past his bedtime."

Peter whines, "Oh Brian come on, just one more game pleeeaasseee."

Rolling his eyes, Brian says, "Oh alright."

Lois escapes to her bedroom, "Now to call 911 on these bitch"!

As she least expects it, the robbers break into her bedroom. "You couldn't get away from us that easy!"

Lois tries to fight but is knocked down again.

"Please don't kill me!". Lois pleads.

"We have decided not to kill you!" said Butch.

Lois says, "good, now you can turn yourselves in."

Nope nope nope that won't do. " said Creeper.

"But consider yourself lucky! " said Knuckles.

Lois is puzzled, "What do you mean"?

" We promise to leave.... " began Slicer.

"Once we've had our fun with you!" said Zippy!

The robbers pin Lois to get bed and try to rape her. "How is this fun! Don't you care that you're hurting a person?" yelled Lois.

Lois find a power within herself, then decides fight off the robbers and takes one down.

Back at the clam, Peter and Quagmire are having one final game.

"Right guys this is it, our last round, let's see who wins." Peter gets ready.

" Right, let's go." cheers Quagmire.

The two play and in the end Peter wins.

"Yaaaaayyyyyy! in your face Quagmire, uhhh I mean, congratulations Quagmire." Peter said

"Thanks Peter." Quagmire shows his gratitude.

The two shake hands while everyone cheers.

"Right let's go home." says Brian

"Sure thing Brian, Lois is probably board waiting for us." Peter agrees.

The groups say goodbye and leave.

Sneaking out Lois is then once again ambushed by the robbers.

"Trying to run away from us?" yells Creeper.

"Nice try! Have to admit, I admire your determination!" said Slicer.

"There's nothing you can do now! We are still going to have our fun with you!" said Zippy

Carrying Lois downstairs she cries, "If only someone can help me."

When they try to rape her once more, Lois screams, "not again! "

Finding courage and strength once more within herself, Lois thinks about her family. Peter. Brian. Chris. Meg. Stewie and how they have no clue what is going on with her.

Lois sees a vision of Peter, "You can do this Lois! You can! Look at all the times you've beaten me up and how you took on Deirdre Jackson when you were a boxer!" Lois then remembers her days as a boxer. "By golly! That's right! I'm not going down! I will not give into these asshole bastards!"

Lois then finally takes down and fights off Slicer with the boxing moves that she learned. Zippy, Knuckles, and Creeper ambush her and tie her hands behind her back again. Then they all try to kiss and caress her. Trying to rape her once more. After a long hard struggle, Lois finally breaks out of the ropes. Beating on the robbers who terrorized her, then and runs away. Calls the cops and tells her tale.

"Hello, Quahog Police! This is Lois Griffin calling from Spooner Street......"

As Peter and the others arrive home they spot several Police cars outside the house and the robbers being led away.

Shocked by the sounds of the sirens Peter spouts, "Holy Shit.!"

Brian asks, "What happened?"

The family get out and approach a nearby officer.

" Can you tell us what happened here? is my mom okay?" Meg asks with concern.

The officer says, "I'll take it you live here?"

Peter answers, "Yes."

The officer explains, "Well it seems that while you were out six robbers broke into the house and terrorized your wife Mr Griffin, they tortured her, but she's alright and in hospital, I'm, ... also afraid to tell you that they took turns raping her. But she fought them off."

Burying his eyes into the palms of his hands Peter cries, "Oh my God!"

The group then headed off to the hospital.

The Griffins visit Lois in the hospital. Knuckles, Creeper, Slicer, Zippy, and Knuckles were all taken into custody and were going to be tried for their crimes. When the Family were all visiting Lois, she has acquired many stitches and injuries. Lois was pleased to see them.

"Oh Peter! So glad you came,.!". Cried Lois.

Peter said, "Lois! What in the wholy freaking Crap happened to you?"

Lois explained, "Those robbers were terrible Peter. They forced their way in. Wanted to steal things. I tried to tell them to go away. They wouldn't listen. They never were satisfied or for enough. So determine to steal things. Even though some wasmt of value. They battered me, r* me, scalped me, tied me up. Took turns raping me."

As Lois began to sob. Peter, Brian, Meg, Chris, and Stewie all assure her everything will be all right.

"Too bad I wasn't there. I would've showed those cocksuckers a thing or to." Stewie says.

"Don't feel sorry Lois. You have us now. " said Brian.

"You have us now.". Said Peter.

Everyone hugs Lois in her hospital bed.

The End

The Proceeding Has Been A Narwhal Puppy Production!
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