FicWad

A friend of mine from Deviantart and myself got together to write this crossover fanfiction. This is another crossover of Paradise PD and American Dad! A shout out and special thanks goes out to you, WeirdSweetNerd97!

Hope you don't mind but I made some changes and alterations. Hope you like what we worked on!


Paradise PD in Association With American Dad Presents





A Narwhal Puppy and WeirdSweetNerd97 Production







Another Day in Paradise





It was a simple day at the CIA and Stan Smith was doing his research on a current terrorist that is hiding out in a current small town. Bullock informs Stan about the terrorist. "Smith! There's a terrorist in our midst"! " Really? Where?". Stan asked.

A town called Paradise" stated Bullock "Hey, I been there before." said Stan

"You have?" Asked Bullock? " You bet. Just tell me the mission and I'll do it". Stan said with pride.

"There's a man named Brett DeMarco who is planning on using thousand amount of Azidoazide azide." explain Bullock
"What is he planning to do with that amount of explosive?" Stan asked "We don't know yet. Just go to Paradise and stop Brent from doing god knows what!" order The director "I won't let you down, Director Bullock!" said the CIA agent with enthusiasm.
Meanwhile at new Legion of DOOOM Headquarters, now with Brett in charge. He was explaining to his crew what he was doing with that much explosive.

Brett DeMarco tells everyone, "Okay men! Here's how it's all going down! We will put this Azidoazide in train tracks, cars, buildings, and anything else we can think of! Any questions?

"And than what? We 9/11 everything" asked Frank

Brett says with an evil gleam on his face, "Yes we shall!"

"That's doesn't sound well-thought of." stated Pat "What if Paradise PD finds out?" ask Pedro "Don't worry about that, I got a man on the inside for that." Brett smiled evilly.

"Wonder who it is? Or maybe you have two men! ha ha ha! Three men! ha ha ha!" tackles the Russian Mobster!

Brett got really annoyed at this. "Stop with the counting! It was okay when that other guy was in charge but I will not tolerate it!" Brett DeMarco screamed. Silence ensued.

"Thank you! Anyway, here's our inside man". Brett continues.

It cut before we see who the inside man is. Meanwhile at the Paradise PD station Police Chief Crawford is explaining to the crew on what is happening. With Robbie and Delbert handcuff to radiator, because the holding cells are currently full.

Robbie implies, "Hey, Delbert! What's grey, hot and leaks all over?"

Delbert answers, "Uhh, you mommas dildo?..."

Randall yells at them, "Shut up you two!".

"Yeah, well handcuff us to a better radiator!" Robbie yelled back. Delbert observes. "This one is leaking all over." "Well you should've thought of that, before you two walk around nude in a bank!" Stated Randall.

"You got that from Breaking Bad didn't you, Randall?". Asks Bullet.

"I been binge watching it" stated Randall "Anyways, what the big announcement, Dad?" Kevin ask his father to get back on track.

"Quit your stalling and tell us!". Demanded Gina.

"Our old CIA buddy Stan is coming here for an investigation" stated Randall "An investigation on what?" asked Dusty

Stanley jumps up, "What? Where?! Who said my name! By the way it's not Smith! Its Hopson!".

"We didn't mean you, Stanley.". Gina spat out! "Oh, right, sorry." said Stanley Hopson as he fell asleep."So when is Stan Smith going to be here?" asks Kevin.

"About right now" answered Randall looking at his watch. Stan enters the room. "Greetings Paradise PD. Stan Smith! CIA". Stan announces himself!

"Welcome back to our humble abode! ". Dusty says. "We haven't been introduced yet, but I am Kevin Crawford. Randall Crawford's son." introduced Kevin "Pleased to meet you Kevin.". Stan tells him. As he turns over to Randall, " So when do we strike? " "We attack at night" says Randall.

"Can't Dad. I got a date tonight" said Kevin and everybody in he office (except for Stan and Dusty who is only laughing to go along with the other) bursted out laughing. Kevin got a little upset at this. "Good one, son" said Randall as he wipe away a tear
"I do" defended Kevin.

Bullet asks, "Who here wants to join Stan to take down Brett DeMarco? Shit boy Kevin is not coming!"

"Bullet!" Kevin squealed. "I DO, I Do!!!!!!!!!!!" Gina exclaimed in excitement, as she pull out a scrapbook "I want to add it to my new scrapbook."



*





Stan Smith says, "Gina Jabowski come on down!" Gina jump out of her chair in excitement "Hell Yeah!!!" A attractive woman with glasses and dark hair around Kevin's came in the room.

"Hello, I'm here to pick up Kevin." said the attractive woman. Kevin's girlfriend was named Lydia. "Hubba Bubba who's the hot chick?!". Bullet exclaimed!

"Hands off her, Bullet! She's mine!" warns Kevin.

"Go ahead and have fun with her. If I we're you I won't use protection!". Randall says.

"Can I come with Gina and Stan too?". Asks Dusty.

"Sure the more the merrier" Gina said seductively

"All right fine! All of you! Get out of my sight!". Randall yells.

Meanwhile at the Legion of DOOOOOM Headquarters. Brett was boasting about his plan to a new member. "Remember that new man I was talking about?" asked Brett. Here he is! Walking into the Headquaters was Ricky Spanish. Who was Roger Smith in disguise. None of them knew.

"Wonderful wonderful! Thank you for having me.". Roger as Ricky Spanish says.

"What is the deal with this puto? ". Asks Pedro.

"Who you calling a Puto, Pooptooth" glared Ricky

"How did you know me!". Pedro screamed in a paranoid manner. "Brett told me everything about you all!" Ricky Spanish answers.

Brett explains, " Okay, Ricky Spanish here is going to wreck havoc upon this town."

"How's he going to do that?" ask Pat "Oh why don't you just jizz to a picture of Jesus Christ!" snapped Ricky

Pat says, "Okay! I will!". Brett DeMarco screams, " Enough! As I have said. I'm in charge and will not tolerate this bullshit by any means necessary! Anyone nonsense out of any of you, I will use my Italian Temper!" Roger as Ricky Spanish asks, " So where do I start first? Who do you want me do in?"

"I want you to get rid of those Paradise PD punks!" order Brent. "On it, sir! You can count on me". Ricky Spanish saluted.

"Those dickheads won't know what hit them" Brett grinned evilly.


"I won't let you down!". Ricky Spanish says. Getting ready for their mission, Stan has Gina, Bullet, and Dusty by his side. Stanley was back at the police station sleeping.

Randall was nearby to keep a close eye out! Looking through a telescope, "What are you planning, you son of a bitch? Got you in my sights!" said Randall as he look out the window. "Be on the lookout for any suspicious activity!". Stan advised the Paradise PD. "I'll be ready with my criminal crusher!". Gina boldly stated!

"Criminal Crusher?" Stan ask with a confused look on his face

Gina shows Stan her night stick. "Oh that thing! Its really called a night stick!"

Bullet reminds them, "Hope we never have to use the shit stick with Stan around!" Gina saw an teenage boy jaywalking and went apeshit. "I like her style! Ought to take her to the Mid East!" Stan said.

Dusty finds something, "I found a clue"! "What is it Dusty" asked Bullet. Dusty picks up a paper that looks like a code to get inside a computer.

"A code hey? Maybe it's a recipe for some cocaine!". Bullet said cheerfully. "Don't be ridiculous. Its a computer cracking code.". Stan reads the paper.

"Maybe that code can lead us to something huge.". States Kevin from behind. With his new girlfriend Lydia by his side. Who decided to join the Paradise PD and Stan Smith after all.





*




"Hey Kevin, aren't you supposed to be on your date." stated Bullet. "I am. Lydia wants to see me at work." explained Kevin with Lydia smiling with excitement. Lydia waves, "Right here guys! Wow! Police work on a date is quite the turn on!"

Kevin smile at that. "Damn Kevin, where did you score a hottie like that?" ask Bullet "I met Lydia at the Manga section at the library" answered Kevin.

"Okay that's enough! No need to hear any romance stories. We need to crack this computer code". Stan said.

" Where do we find a computer? " Asks Dusty.

"Hey, maybe I can help out with this cause. You can find computers at the library" stated Lydia. As everyone was headed towards the library, Ricky Spanish was in close watch. "This is going to be easier than I thought it going to be" smiled Rick. Then his cellphone rings. On the other end it was Brett DeMarco.

"Do you have the target on sight?" question Brett. "Yes I do, boss" answered Ricky. Entering the library, Stan finds the computers. "A-ha! We found what we needed!" Stan sat down and type in the codes and found something shocking

Dusty was shocked the most, "Golly gee whiz! Will you look at that!"

"Oh my God!" Kevin said with wide eyes. Gina got back and see that everybody is sitting at the computer "What's going on?" ask Gina. Stan responds, "I finally cracked the code....". Ricky Spanish was just outside the library. "Now to sneak up on them, without being noticed." Ricky Spanish said to himself as he enters the library, but knock over those wheel things that carry books

Kevin feels alarmed, "Did anyone hear that?"

Lydia says, "Sort of..."

Gina could sense that someone is trying to sneak up on them, she got into attack mode. Stan was impressed with her moves. "Like this woman's style!" "I think he's right over.....there!". Gina pointed. Ricky Spanish froze into place, Stan is in a state of stupefaction. Stan and Gina slowly approach Ricky Spanish.

"Don't come any closer, I am packing a heater" said Ricky Spanish as he put his hand on the inside his vest, to make it look like he have a gun on him.

"Does that mean he has a bomb?". Dusty exclaimed. " Hope not!". Kevin said. " Nobody told me this was going to happen." Says Lydia. "What the hell, Roger!" Stan exclaimed quietly through gritted teeth

"You know this asshole?" Hollered Gina. "He does!" stated Ricky Spanish. "How do you two know each other!". Asked Dusty as a standoff was about to break out.

"Oh boy! This is the best date ever. ". Lydia says with glee.

Bullet decides to intervene. "Okay everybody, calm down" said Bullet who begins to sniff around.

"What can you tell us, Bullet? Do you know who this twat waffle is?" ask Gina.

Using his 'instinct', Bullet observes some more, then says, "He seems to be affiliated with the Legion of DOOOOOM!"

"Hmm, we can use a dog with your nose like you at the CIA!" Stan spoke.

Ricky Spanish uses the distraction to punch Stan in the groin.





*



In the library, Stan gets angry, "Oh no you didn't!" He tackled Ricky Spanish to the ground and the two started fighting. A librarian hushed, "This is a library! Not a boxing ring!". Nobody listens to her.

Meanwhile, at the Legion of DOOOOOM. Brett DeMarco was watching through a computer how Stan and Roger aka Ricky Spanish were in an intense fight!

Brett says, "Isn't this great, Legion of DOOOOOM? Its wonderful to see My poetry in motion!" Pedro agrees, "Yes indeed! Look at those putos go at each other!"

Russian Mobster said, "This more entertaining than any cockfights I went to" Marco chimed in, then drooled when he saw Lydia "And who is that luscious lady with Kevin." "She's hotter than Mother Dolphin" Said Frank, Jerry nodded in agreement with his father. "Perhaps we ought to get closer to her. If you know what I mean." Marcos Narcos suggests.

"Yeah, you're onto something there!" Brett smirked.

"How about we target Kevin!" Asks Pat who then continued, "Then I'll force the word of the Lord on him!"

"Yes, with Kevin out of the picture, we can have this babe." stated Brett.

Brett and his Legion of DOOOOOM begin to put their plan in motion! That will lead to an even bigger plot! Meanwhile at the library, Ricky Spanish and Stan wore each other out giving Gina the chance to knock Roger out with her nightstick and Smacking Stan too.

"And That's for hogging all the action!" stated Gina in anger. Stan just laughs it off. "What none of them knew was Brett DeMarco and his Legion of DOOOOOM were on their way.

"Remember the plan?" Brett said as he drove the van, they all nodded in agreement. As they arrive as the library, they got in position.

Brett leads the way. Then Russian Mobster, Jerry, Frank, Pedro, and Pat all soon followed. They went to the power storage and cut off the power. Dusty shrieks in fear, "Ahhhhh! Who turned out the lights! I'm afraid of the dark!" "Come to me I'll keep you safe." Gina purred seductively.

Gunshots were fired and and muffled screaming, then the lights turned and Lydia's gone. Kevin been shot in the arm, Stan in the leg and Bullet in the shoulder. "Damn it! I was going to offer to lick anyone's wounds"! Bullet offers to help.

" Forget that! Get an ambulance! " Stan yelled. Lydia screams for help. "KKEEVVVIIINNN!!!! HELP! I'M BEING KIDNAPPED!"

"Oh no! They've taken Lydia! I never should've let her come with me! Its all my fault!" Kevin cries out. "Don't beat yourself up, Kevin. I'm sure she's fine." Dusty reassured.

Lydia now found herself at the Legion of DOOOOOOM Headquarters. Her arm tied behind a chair and her leg free. Jerry started to hump her leg like a dog.

"You won't get away with this!" Lydia screams. "Think I already have! Don't you damsels in distress have anything better to say then 'you will never get away with this'? Jesus! That's getting old!" cackles Brett. "YES!" Pat chirps. "Wasn't talking to you, Pat!" Brett yells.

"Tell our guest about our plan!" Frank says. "With pleasure." Brett says.

"We will put this Azidoazide in train tracks, cars, buildings, and anything else we can think of!" Brent explains. "Is that all?" asked a confused Lydia.

"Oh it doesn't stop there!" said Pat. "Tell her some more!" adds Pedro.

"We are finally going to get rid of those Paradise PD dick dongs by doing a 9/11 on everything!" boasted Brett."That's a stupid idea." said Lydia.



*



The Legion of DOOOOOM were taunting Lydia with their big plan.



"And when we're carrying out our scheme....." began Frank. "Santa Maria, your boyfriend Kevin will never find you!" Marcos Narcos laughs. Lydia cries, "Oh Kevin! Save me!"

Back at the Paradise PD. Kevin, Stan, and Bullet had just gotten out of the hospital. Their wounds were taken care of. Randall was deeply disappointed with everybody, that Brett and the Legion of DOOOOOM got away.

"How the hell did you idiots, mange to screw everything up!?!" demanded Randall. "Hello! We got shot!" Bullet concedes. "Even I did get shot!" Stan hollered.

"My girlfriend got kidnapped! We need to find her." Kevin pleaded. "Back in the 70s, I receive anal sex from Charles Kaiser during the gay civil right movement!" Stanley shouted out randomly.

"It wasn't our undoing! It was Ricky Spanish!" Stan explains.

Dusty throws his hat into the conversation,"He sidetracked us!"

"We just found out that twat waffle is working for the Legion of DOOOOOM! ". Gina shouts.

"We got to get this Ricky Spanish and demand him to tell us their plan!" Stated Randall who then points to a holding cell. "We already got them in custody." Stan pointed out "Leave him to me!" Robbie and Delbert were the inside men in custody.

"Who're the inside men? These guys!". Robbie jokes around referring to themselves. "More like Inside Out men! That one Disney movie!". Delbert joins in.

"Want us to go with Stan again, Dad?". asks Kevin, " After all my girlfriend is in danger." "Of course." Randall said. Randall decides to go with them. To make sure nobody messes up.

They arrive at the Legion of DOOOOOM headquarters. Bullet breaks down the door despite being shot. Randall and Gina lead the way. Jerry try to hump Lydia leg again, but Frank taser him. "Great parenting, puto." Pedro says to Frank.

"Ricky Spanish! I know you're here! Come out this minute!" screamed Stan.

Lydia sees Kevin, " He's come for me!" "Guys, I'm right here!" Lydia called out. Brett DeMarco, Frank, Pedro, Pat Jerry and Marcos all surrounded Stan and the Paradise PD.

Ricky Spanish walks in and claps his hands. Stan gives Ricky Spanish the evil eye.

"What are you doing this!?!" demanded Stan "You know why! No need to bother to ask?". Ricky Spanish glares at Stan. "No, I don't know why." answered Stan. "Because you stole that last piece of cake from me!". Ricky Spanish confessed.

"A cake thief hey? That's a real low! All the more reason to bump you off along with the Paradise PD! And people want to think drug dealers are bad!" Brett joins in. "So all this was because he took the last cake from you" Kevin ask Ricky Spanish.

"Exactly! So Brett. Can we move along with the scheme?" Ricky Spanish says.

"Not if we have anything to say about it!" Gina said revving up. They all got into fighting position Dusty noticing something was missing. "Whatever happened to that black guy and British dude?" asks Dusty. Brett's response was, "Yes they used to be members here. Where they went, nobody knows!"

Then according to Dusty, someone else was missing. "Where's Jerry?" asked Dusty. Jerry comes out of nowhere and licks up Dusty while everyone else engaged in a fight.

Gina was against Marco Narcos Randall was up against Brett DeMarco himself. Kevin was about to take on Frank. Bullet is about to attack the Russian Mobster. Lydia was in the middle of this and she took the opportunity to trip Frank

Frank hovered over Lydia in anger, "You'll pay for that cunt!" Then Kevin comes from behind and clobbers Frank with a chair.





*



"Your my hero, Kevin!" smiled Lydia, as Kevin untied her and pick her up bridal style. The couple immediately tongue kiss. Lydia tells Kevin, "Shall we join in on the fight?" "I'm in!" Kevin says cracking his knuckles.

Kevin and Lydia join Randall, Bullet, Stan and Gina to fight the Legion of DOOOOOM!

Ricky Spanish tries to sneak out. The Paradise PD put up a great fight with the Legion of DOOOOOM! At the end of the fight. The Paradise PD triumphs! Russian Mobster, Jerry, Frank, Pedro, Pat all got beaten up and laying on the floor

However Brett DeMarco remains. Who was a little far behind.

"We did it!" Cheered Kevin!

"We kicked ass!" Gina said proudly.

"Guess its safe to say we won!". Randall says standing tall.

"I get dibs on inventory!" Bullet announced.

"We're free! We're finally free". Lydia breathes in relief.

Brett DeMarco yells from behind, "Oh no you're not!" He has the bomb with him. Stan says, "Leave this all to me!" "What are you going to do" Brent said teasing Stan. Stan gets a lasso, "Saw Sean Connery do this in that movie The Rock!".

"Oooh! He's kinda sexy with that lasso!". Gina purrs. "No lasso is going to stop me from activating this plan!". Brett laughs. "You wanna bet?" said Stan as he lassos Brett who tells Stan, "Want to take a gamble on it? Like Matt Damon in Rounders?" As Brett is lassoed Stan catches the device Brett was going to use to cause explosions all over Paradise! Stan then beats on Brett until Brett is sore.

"Now that's what I call a sore loser"! Bullet jokes. Everybody laugh at this and Stan deactivate the bomb

"Feel the wrath of my Italian temper fuckhead!" Growls Brett DeMarco. Despite being hurt from when Stan beat him, he broke free and tries to attack. Gina causally knock Brett out

Randall shakes the hand of Stan Smith. To extend his gratitude. "We couldn't have done it without you." stated Randall.



"Pleasure doing business with you". Stan shakes Randalls hand. "In the meantime, let's round up these fuck tards!". Gina demands. They rounded up all the Legion of DOOOOM Brett included. All except for Ricky Spanish Who was seen getting away on a speed train! "Ah ha ha ha ha ha ha ha! Just like the ending of The French Connection!". Ricky Spanish evilly cackles.

Then the train crashed. Roger aka Ricky Spanish jumped off and landed in a lake Swimming to shore Roger takes off his Ricky Spanish costume. "Back to Langley Falls for me". Roger said. Back in Paradise... They are loading The Legion of DOOOOOM in the back of the police van.

"That was the best date ever!" said Lydia Kevin kisses Lydia, "Glad you had fun!" "Lets do it again sometime". Lydia says. A crowd looks on at all the commotion, Gina tells everyone to go home.

" All right! Shows over! Nothing here to see!". Gina told the crowd. "Yeah only sick perverts want to see Kevin and Lydia make out!". Bullet joins in. Randall tells everyone.... "We stopped The Legion of DOOOOOM from blowing up the city." said Randall

"Oh yeah baby!". Cheered Bullet! "You sounded like Austin Powers, Bullet. " giggles Dusty. Gina laughs at that remark then sighs. "What's wrong, Gina?" asked Bullet. "I miss the fun we had with Stan Smith." Gina admits. "Stan Smith is married, so you better not try to seduce him next time we see him." Randall warns him. "I knew that. I only like him as a friend." Gina said. "In the meantime, you always have me!" Dusty tells Gina. "Happy about that! With you around, Dusty who needs Stan!" Gina said.

"So another case closed! Until next time.". Randall says. Pat Robertson says as he's being carted away, " I'm a man of God! Never thought I'd end up in the joint! " "Well tough shit!" Gina snarks. Randall, Bullet, Gina, Kevin, Lydia and Dusty all laugh. Lets all go home!". Bullet suggests. Stanley runs out to see everyone. "Did I miss anything?"

Lydia spends the night with Kevin.

Meanwhile in Langley Falls... Roger was plotting something in the attic. Stan barges in. "Stan, Why are you home early?" asked Roger trying to play dumb to what happen. "Don't play innocent with me! You embarrassed me back in Paradise!". Stan started off on Roger. Roger screams as he run away from Stan

"Get back here! Get back here! I'm not done with you yet"! Stan screamed chasing Roger down the street.

Francine watches from the doorstep. "What's with them? Oh well?"



The End


The Proceeding Has Been A Narwhal Puppy and Weirdsweetnerd97 Production!