FicWad

I took a long-needed shower after Missile was settled in bed. I was however, still on high alert. I was panicking that it was going to happen again. Ghoul had showed me to a room that I could take for the time being. I had notified the crew back at the hideout that I was safe and that put their worries to rest as well. So much has happened in the last few hours, it was only 8AM, none of us had any sleep. We were all on such high alert.
I swapped over my clothes through my pod system and stared at myself in the mirror. “I need to chill out,” I mumbled to myself. I could hear the commotion on the floor above, they were cleaning the mess that Missile had left behind.
I heard a sudden knock on my door. “Who is it?” I asked, my voice breaking in the middle of the sentence.
“It’s Party, I need to speak to you,” Party said calmly. There were so many questions running through my mind, Party must have some as well. I was in for a long talk.
“Come in,” I called, moving out of the bathroom into the sitting area of the room.
Party slowly opened the door and smiled slightly “Can we talk?” He asked, hesitantly. I nodded
“Sure,” I said opening a bottle of water. I felt awkward, I didn’t really believe he was actually in front of me, alive.
Party nodded and sat down beside me. “I’m sure you have a lot of questions, I also have a lot of questions,” He said playing with his thumbs.
“Well, neither of us are going to sleep any time soon, so,” I shrugged. “Do you want to start?” I asked, looking at him. I had butterflies in my stomach, I felt so nauseous. I had planned out what I wanted to say in my head, but it had all gone to mush.
Party nodded. A small silence fell over the two of us, Party was trying to work out what to say to me. I was thinking of what to say to him, it was like we were two strangers. Following the incident at the warehouse and I had finally got back on feet, we were inseperable, we didn’t put a label on what we were, because of the possible consequences. That was something I had regretted after the ambush at the house. I didn’t have the chance to properly tell him how much he meant to me. He didn’t get that opportunity either. I had convinced myself it was just a ‘thing’ that wouldn’t amount to anything.
Party eventually broke the silence, “Where did you actually go after the ambush?” He asked. “I want to know what you did and where you were this entire time,” Party asked looking at me. He was still surprised I was even sitting beside him.
I took another sip of water. “Okay, so you don’t want anymore lies right?” I asked. He nodded in reply. “Okay, if I tell you, you have to also tell me everything I ask okay?” I asked back, laying out the terms of this conversation.
“That seems fair,” Party nodded.
“Okay great, so basically, I was working on a project. It is my dimension portal, I am able to travel to other dimensions. My biggest client and partnerships are in one of those dimensions,” I said softly. I knew this was going to get me into trouble with The Black Parade but at this point, it was important to be honest.
Party nodded “Was it the project you used to stay up until 3AM working on?” He asked, starting to feel slightly more comfortable.
I nodded “I decided it would be best for me to leave, I blamed myself for your death. I had brought havoc to the killjoys. The first place I thought of was there, the place I went was basically the after life in the simplest terms. I stayed there for a while and eventually decided it was time for me to come back. I kept an even lower profile and then Adrenaline and Thrill found me,” I finished. I figured it would be best to keep this basic so that Party could understand.
“Wow,” He said. “That’s impressive that it works,” He said raising an eyebrow. “You weren’t even in this reality, so to say, you didn’t get wind of Korse dying or anything,” He said.
I nodded “I only heard about that from Adrenaline and Thrill,” I sighed. “What I want to know is, why are you still carrying on BLI? This went against everything we spoke about and planned for. We planned to bring back normality for everyone Party” I barely got those words out of my mouth. I was disappointed in him for doing this.
He stiffened slightly. “After you got killed, I felt.. well, heartbroken,” He said looking at me. “I was so overcome with anger and pain that I went on a killing spree of the draculoids and eventually killed Korse, which lead to me taking control” He paused. “After considerate negotiations with the other senior officials of course,” he said with a shrug. “I allowed my emotions to control what I done next. I didn’t want anyone else to feel what I felt, when that power was in my hands, I made sure that everyone had medications to stop them feeling any type of emotions, so that they wouldn’t go through that heart ache.” He said, throwing his head in his hands. “Then one thing led to another, and I’ve stayed in charge ever since, I didn’t think to stop it, I didn’t consider it, I got carried away with it,” He said looking at me with tears in his eyes. My heart broke, listening to him.
“Were you going to use my watch as a way of getting into my technology to boost BLI? If that wasn’t me in disguise?” I asked, it was flooding out of me, I wasn’t even giving him a chance to ask me anything.
Party paused again. “Yes,” He eventually muttered out. “I wanted to use it to its full potential” He mumbled. “I knew what you were capable of making and if I had got back into that watch and got into Kai, I could have-“ He stopped himself. “It’s not important,” He stopped himself.
I shook my head, “Fucking hell,” I mumbled out wiping my own tears away. “You’ve become a dictator, Party,” I said.
“I know,” He said. “I can’t lie about that,” He said. “You tore me apart,” He said. “No one has ever made an impact on my life, the way you have,” he sighed, lighting up a cigarette.
I hesitated for a second, “Surely that has passed,” I said. “You haven’t saw me in so long-“
“It hasn’t passed,” He interrupted looking at me straight in the eye. “It will never pass, Music,” He continued. I was shell shocked again. “I cared about you so much, I didn’t even have the chance to tell you,” He shook his head.
“Party.. I-“
“I saw a future with you Music, I didn’t care if it was legal or not,” He continued. It was a relief for him to get this off his chest. Another silence dropped over us. I couldn’t even form a sentence in my brain, as I processed this. “I still do,” He finished and stood up.
It felt as if someone had ripped my vocal cords out of my throat. I was numb.
“But you probably don’t,” Party said, attempting to hide the pain in his voice, at this point his back was to me.
“I didn’t forget you Party, I never did,” I eventually managed to get out. “And I never will,” I finished also standing up from my seat despite my legs being unsteady.
Party froze on his spot and hung his head down. “Why didn’t you tell me, when we had the chance?” He asked
“I didn’t want to endanger you or get ahead of myself-“
“You saw how well Kobra and Adrenaline done it, we could have done that,” Party said.
“We are both alive, we still fucking can,” I spat back. I walked quickly out of the room; the emotions were getting too much for me to handle. “I am going to check on Missile, I need to fuckin’ think,” I said and closed the door behind me. I walked quickly to Missile’s room, my head was fuzzy and scrambled from what just happened.
Missile was still laying there fast asleep. I got in beside her and shut my eyes. I wouldn’t sleep unless I was with her, sleep would probably help to clear my mind.