FicWad

Somewhere in Ocean Avenue in the state of New Jersey. There was a fast food restaurant named Bob's Burgers. Bob Belcher who was the owner of Bob's Burgers and patriarch of the Belcher family. It was Sunday. Belchers were bored. Because Sunday was their day their restaurant didn't get enough business. They were taking a break from working in the kitchen and trying to decide on something they all can do.

"We can watch one of those Hallmark movies." suggests Linda. "No, no, no. Linda. I don't want to watch a network that shows Christmas movies all year long." Bob says.

"You're right Dad! That's boring. How about we watch a sci fi like The Martian!" Louise says. "You're too young for those type of movies, honey." Linda told her youngest daughter.

"I know. How about I pick a movie? A Boy Band movie would be good. Ring of Darkness!" Tina says. "NO! NO! NO! A car chase would be cool! How about Mother Jugs and Speed!" said Gene.

"Everytime we choose a movie it's always something we can't agree on." said Bob. "I know. Anything to get rid of this boredom." said Linda. "It's not our fault that hardly anybody wants to eat at our place on Sundays." Gene said.

"You're right. On Sundays people would rather go to Jimmy Pesto's." Bob gets a word in edgewise. The sky suddenly turned dark. Gene screams, "AAAHHH!!! It's getting dark! We'll be like Seth Rogan and James Franco in This Is The End!"

"Perfect! That's what we'll watch! Good thing we have it on DVD!" Bob said. Their power went out for a minute then turned back on. A slimy green portal appeared near the restaurant. Out comes a Space Invaders style spaceship. It parked right next to Bob's Burgers.

"We have visitors!" Gene said astounded. "Yes! Aliens are here! I knew they were real!" Louise says. "Oh look! Their spaceship it opening." Tina observes.

Exiting the spaceship was an old man who looked like a scientist named Rick Sanchez. Behind him was his grandson, Morty Smith.

"Aww, man! Those aliens look like us humans!" Louise said with disappointment. "Well you can't have everything sweetie." Linda says.

"I don't care who they are! At least we're getting some service on Sunday!" Bob says.

Rick and Morty enter the restaurant. Bob Belcher greets, "Hello. Welcome to Bob's Burgers. May I take your order?"

"No we're not here to eat!" Rick said. "Aww, shit! You promised me we were going to get that Szechaun sauce." Morty cries. "I lied okay." Rick informs his grandson.

"So what are you here for if not for our food?" asked Linda.

"Are you guys the Belcher family from Bob's Burgers?" asked Rick.

"Last time we checked we are!" Linda said. "In the flesh!" Bob said. "Oh a Pink Floyd fan! I like you already." Rick said.

"Why are you guys here?" asked Tina. "Yeah, it's not very often we get service on a Sunday." said Gene.

"We're here because we chose you for an experiment." Morty tells them.

"Wow! You mean like dissection! Cool!" Louise said. "No, No. Not like that. We have chosen you to go inside a video game!" Rick said.

"Hmm. It's not everyday we're asked to be in a video game." Bob said. "Should we go for it, honey? Should we trust these guys?" asked Linda who was uncertain.

"It never hurts to try anything new. So why not! We'll do it!" Bob agrees. "Sure we can give it a try." Tina said. "We're willing to do that. You would not believe how bored we get on Sundays!" Gene said.

Rick said, "I thought you'd want to go inside a video game!" "You guys seemed like the perfect candidates for this experiment. We wanted to use a family that's down to earth." Morty explains. Rick says, "Just walk into this device right here."

Getting out a remote, a steel door appears. "Morty, attach this old school Nintendo into the steel door." Rick told Morty.

"Got it, Grandpa!" Morty said hooking up the Nintendo to the steel doors. Morty asks, "Which game are we going to put them in?"

"This one!" Rick said throwing a cartridge to Morty who inserts it into the Nintendo.

"What game are we going into? By any chance....is it Duck Hunt?" asked Louise.

"Better than Duck Hunt!" said Rick.

"Spy Hunter?" asked Tina.

"Better than Spy Hunter." said Rick.

"Uhhh, Bubble Bobble?" asked Gene.

"Way better than that piece of shit game!" said Rick.

"1943!" Bob guesses.

"Nope nope nope." said Morty.

"I got one! Life Force!" Louise chirped.

"Not on your life!" said Rick.

"We give up, which one?" Linda said.

"Just go inside and you'll find out soon enough!" Rick said. The Belchers all enter the steel doors. Rick uses a remote that closes the steel doors shut as electricity surrounded the steel doors. The Belchers didn't like the feel of the jolt they were experiencing. Even Louise could not take it.

"Okay! You can stop shocking us now!" Louise shouted from inside.

The steel door opens and the Belchers were gone. Rick turns on the TV and sees the Belchers in a world like one they have never seen before.

"Uhhh, Mr. Scientist? Sir?" Bob says looking around confused by his and his family's new surroundings.

"Please, call me Rick!" said Rick.

"Okay Rick. We have no idea what this place is..." Linda says.

"I don't know where we are but it sure is bitching!" Gene said.

"Let's explore." Tina said.

Searching high and low the Belchers sees poles that looks like ones you would find at a barber shop, plants, trees, and weird looking buildings that looked like they were made out of mud and grass.

"Uhh, where are we?" Louise asks.

"Give up?" asked Morty.

"What game did you transport us into?" asked Bob.

"OKay, you guys deserve to know. Welcome to Subcon!" Rick said. "Never heard of it." said Tina. "You're all in the Nintendo classic game Super Mario Bros. 2!" Rick and Morty both say together to the Belcher family.

"Oh, shit." Bob said. A Shyguy passes them. They all scream at it. "What the fuck was that thing! A monk!" shouted Gene. "Gene! Language!" Linda said.



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The Belchers were in World 1-1. All sorts of creatures were passing them by. Shyguys. Tweeters. Ninjis. Even Sniffets.

"Holy shit! Did that monk thingy just spit out a bullet?" shrieks Gene. "Looks like it." said Tina. Rick communicates with Bob through headphones with a microphone attached.

"Hello, Bob!" Rick called out. "Is that you, Rick!?" asked Bob. "No it's a Wonderful WIzard of Oz! One thing I forgot to tell you about Subcon." Rick said.

"What is it?" asked Bob.

"When you defeat Wart, who's in World 7-2. You have to pop open a vase with a cork." said Rick.

"Okay then what?" asked Bob.

"You will see these creatures in the vase who are called Subcon like the world you're in. It's only fair to warn you...." said Rick.

"Think we're in enough danger as it is here." Bob said.

"If you meet these Subcon creatures. Do NOT call them Con-Yards!" Rock warns Bob.

"Why not?" asked Bob. "Because if you call a Subcon creature a Con-Yard that's racist to them." Rick tells them.

"All right, gotcha!" Bob said. Soon the Shyguys, Tweeters, Sniffets and Ninjis were closing in on them.

"Uhh, Dad. Perhaps you should've asked that Rick guy how you can kill these bastards!" Tina said.

Morty now uses the headphones, "I played this game before. Try plucking one of those plants."

"Okay." Linda says. Bob, Linda, Tina, Gene, and Louise try plucking the plants. All they can pick up is onions and carrots.

"Hmmm, maybe we can use these veggies for a new recipe I've been thinking of." Bob said. "No you dumbass! It's not for cooking! Use the veggies against those Shyguys!" Morty shouted through the microphone.

"Major tip here. All of Wart's minions hate vegetables!" Rick tells the Belchers.

All the Belchers try to throw the veggies at the Tweeters, Shyguys, Ninjis, and Sniffets but missed.

"Dammit! We missed!" Gene groans. A Sniffet's bullet hits Linda in the arm. "AAAHH! I'm hit!" Linda screams.

"Try to pluck some more plants!" Morty ordered them. "How can I! I don't want to play anymore! I'm hurt!" Linda protested.

Bob tried a plant and he plucks up a potion. "Oh look. Maybe you can drink this." Bob said. "I want relief for my arm wound!" Linda demands.

"I can tie a tourniquet." Tina offers. Bob drinks the potion, which has Rick and Morty outraged.

"NO! Don't drink it!" Rick shouted. Bob drinks it anyway then he morphs into a door.

"Dad! You've turned into a door!" Tina freaked out.

"What! Oh Jesus Christ of Ladder Day Saints! Do I really look like a door?"! Bob asked.

"Yes, you do! Hey lets open up daddy and see his guts!" Louise said as he laughs.

"Good thinking Louise. Maybe there's a cure for me in here!" Linda said. Tina, Louise, Linda, and Gene go inside Bob who's now a door and they all find themselves in Subspace.

"Geez! It's dark in here." Gene said. "This is way past my bedtime on a school night!" Tina implied. Bob turned back into himself. "Dad! You're not a door anymore." Gene said.

"Son of a bitch! Back to normal! I was hoping to see his guts!" Louise said in disgust. "Louise! Language!" Linda demands although she is still in pain from when the Sniffet shot her.

Bob sees a mushroom. "Hey, Linda maybe that mushroom can help you with your wound." "Worth a try." Linda says as she staggered to get to the mushroom. Then she picks it up with her other arm and Linda was cured.

"Woah! Who says shrooms should be illegal." Linda said feeling better. Before they knew it, they were back in World 1-1.

"I just don't get it. Why was it dark in that...." Gene ponders. Morty informs him, "That place was called Subspace. It's where you can get a Mushroom as a Power Up and you pluck the plants for coins."

"We ought to get some coins next time we go to Subspace." Tina said. The Shyguys, Tweeters, Sniffets, and Ninjis were now chasing the Belcher family.

"Dad, are those star things cats?" asked Gene. "No they're called Ninjis!" Rick told them. "Are they stars or cats?" asked Bob. "They're half cat and half asshole! Let's just leave it at that!" Rick said.

"What are those creatures with the masks and robes called? Are they ham people or monks!?" asked Gene. "They're Shyguys! The wear a mask because they're shy! Those other ones are called Tweeters and Sniffets." Rick said to them.

Still being chased by the Shyguys, Tweeters, Ninjis, and Sniffets. Bob suggests, "Rick told us we need to pluck some more plants."

Louise sees a POW Block on one of the poles. It was easy for her to jump up on the pole and get it.

"Hey Mom and Dad! Big brother and sister!" Louise says holding a POW Block.

Bob, Linda, Tina, and Gene were out of breath from running. The Shyguys, Ninjis, Tweeters, and Sniffets were just about to catch up to them.

"Louise honey. Put that down. That's not a toy!" Linda warned her. "You don't know what that is!" Tina tells Louise. "Please put it back where you found it." Bob begged her. "No! Let her use it!" Rick tells Bob.

"Go ahead, uhhh, Louise is it. Use that POW Block!" said Morty.

"All right yeah! I get to use it!" Louise cheers. Throwing the POW Block on the ground, it creates an earthquake that killed the Shyguys, Tweeters, Ninjis, and Sniffets.

"WOW! That...was....fun! I wanna try it again!" Louise says. "It killed off all those bad creatures!" Gene observes.

Louise plucks one of the plants, and she found another POW Block. "Oh boy! Let's do it again!" Louise says with excitement.

"NO LOUISE! NO MORE!" "DON'T DO IT!" Bob, Linda, Gene, Tina all begged her to stop. Louise throws the POW Block again and causes an Earthquake.

"YEAH! AWESOME! FUN! I FEEL POW! ERFUL! GET IT!" Louise yelled.

"Louise, you've had your fun with the POW Block." Rick said. "Yeah, you haven't even meet Birdo yet!" Morty tells her.

"Thought his name was Ostro." Rick said in confusion. "Never trust an instruction manual Grandpa". Morty tells Rick.

Sure enough, Louise finds yet another POW Block. "HERE I GO AGAIN!" Louise says throwing the POW Block at her family.

Bob, Linda, Gene, and Tina held onto each other. The Belchers except Louise kept falling over. Yet, Louise finds another POW Block!

"That is enough POW Blocks! Stop now! Finish the level!" Rick demanded. "Yeah, you guys haven't even seen World 4-2 yet!" Morty tells them.

"POW!" Louise shouts happily. "NO! NO! DON'T!" Bob, Linda, Gene, and Tina all plead with her. Louise threw the POW Block again. Bob, Linda, Tina, and Gene all flew around World 1-1. Another POW Block is found be Louise.

"POW!"

"NO! NO PLEASE!"

Louise kept causing one Earthquake after another with every POW Block she found. "Where the fuck are all these POW Blocks coming from!" asked Rick. "Oh! I forgot that I had a Game Genie installed on the cartridge." Morty explains.

"That explains everything!" Rick said. "I'm sorry, Grandpa." Morty apologizes. "Oh don't worry. I just wanted to use this family to see how they would survive the dangers of Subcon." Rick said. "You always were a sadistic one, Grandpa! That's why you're way cooler than Dad!" Morty said.

Linda tries to stand her ground with Louise, "This POW Block business stops right now...." Louise found another POP Block then she finds 5 more and throws them all at once.

"I don't think so! POW! POW POW! I want to live here in Subcon forever! So I can POW Blocks all day!" laughs Louise.

The POW Blocks caused Bob, Linda, Tina, and Gene to go flying around. Bob landed in a tree. Linda landed on a log going down a waterfall. Tina landed on a grassy building and Gene fell next to her.

"Maybe getting no service on Sundays isn't so bad after all." Bob says. "I just want to get out of Subcon. Rick! Please! Take us home!" Linda said. "Yeah, I want to go home more Louise terrorizes us with more POW BLOCKS!" Tina pleaded. "Our time here in Subcon would've been much better without these fucking POW Blocks!" Gene yelled.

"Don't worry. I got some good news and bad news." Rick tells the Belcher family.

"Bad news first." said Gene. "You're stuck here until you can get to World 7-2." Rick said.

"Shit!" Bob said. "But never fear. We're sending somebody to help you!" Morty said.

Rick goes on his phone, "Hello? Mr. Poopybutthole! We need your help."



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A slime green portal appeared and Mr. Poopybutthole came out to assist Rick and Morty. "Ooh Wee! What can I do for you today?" asked Mr. Poopybutthole.

"We had a family go inside Super Mario Bros 2." Morty explains.

"Yeah, and that psychotic youngest daughter is going insane with those POW Blocks." Rick tells Mr. Poopybutthole.

"No problem! I can put a stop to that! Mr. Poopybutthole! At your service!" Mr Poopybutthole said.

"The only problem is the family can't be free unless they solve the game." Rick said. "Ooh Wee! I love myself a dilemma! Good thing I know how to solve Super Mario 2!" Mr. Poopybutthole implies.

Rick and Morty have Mr. Poopybutthole go inside the steel doors that lead to Subcon the same way the Belchers entered. "ooh-wee! This feels very shocking!" Mr. Poopybutthole says feeling the electricity.

Louise was still hellbent on throwing POW Blocks. Linda tells her, "When we get back home you're grounded for a month!" "Awww." Louise said.

That finally put an end to Louise's POW Block reign of terror. Mr. Poopybutthole appears before Bob.

"Who are you?" asked Bob. "I'm Mr. Poopybutthole! I'm here to get you out of this game! Rick and Morty sent me."

"Can you show us the way out?" Tina asked. "Yes, I don't think I can take this anymore." Gene said. "It was hell right from the start. These creatures kept chasing us and wanting to kill us!" Bob panics.

"Come with me!" Mr. Poopybutthole tells the family. A pidget came with a magic carpet and Mr. Poopybutthole threw it off. "This magic carpet is our only way out!" Mr. Poopybutthole tells Bob.

Bob, Linda, Louise, Tina, and Gene all joined Mr. Poopybutthole on the magic carpet. "Is this a Thief of Baghdad thing?" asked Bob.

The magic carpet flew with Mr. Poopybutthole flying it. Was flying all through the worlds of Subcon. First to World 2 the Desert. Then World 3, World 4 the winter land. World 5 the dark land.

"See? You don't even have to fight them! Just fly though the game!" Mr. Poopybutthole says. "This is kind of fun." Tina said. Along the way they see some bosses like Birdo, Tryclyde, Mouser, Clawgrip, and Fryguy.

"Ohh! Shit! That fire monster is terrifiying! Don't know how Mario could stand that!" Bob implies.

"The secret to this game is to cheat your way though." Mr. Poopybutthole informs the Belchers. "Heard something about warp zones on these Mario games once." Gene said.

"Don't even need those if I do say so myself!" Mr. Poopybutthole says. The Magic Carpet was now headed into the other desert level World 6.

"Another desert level?' asked Linda. Louise began to regret going on a POW Block throwing spree. "I'm sorry about those POW Blocks." Louise said, "I bet you are! No matter how many times you apologize. You're still grounded." Linda said.

"Awww, man." Louise said. Before they knew it, they were in World 7. Thanks to Mr. Poopybutthole's magic carpet. Then they flew into World 7-2 and were in Wart's palace. Rick and Morty watch and decide that they all should come back.

"Should we bring them back now?" asked Morty. "Nah, they have to beat Wart first? Remember?" Rick told his grandson. "Oh that's right." Morty said

Finally reaching Wart. Bob screams at Wart's appereance. As did Linda, Tina, Gene and even Louise. "Stand in a corner, guys! I'll take care of this!" Mr. Poopybutthole says. Picking up five vegetables from the horns Mr. Poopybutthole is about to throw them at Wart.

"I am the Great Wart! You think some veggies are going to stop me!" Wart told Mr. Poopybutthole.

"You bet it will. If there's anything you and your cronies hate the most is veggies!" Mr. Poopybutthole says throwing all the vegetables down Wart's throat. Bob, Linda, Tina, Gene, and Louise all huddled together in fear. "Oooh. I hope he knows what he's doing!" Gene said.

When the vegetables were thrown down Wart's throat, he fell to his death. A door appeared, Mr. Poopybutthole and the Belcher family all go inside.

"Wow. Thanks so much for helping us, Mr. Poopybutthole." Bob said. "Think nothing of it. Now to free the people of Subcon!" Mr. Poopybutthole then jumps onto the vase and pulls out the cork. Out comes the Subcon residents who formed a circle around Mr. Poopybutthole!

"Ooh-wee! Looks like I'm the contributor!" Mr. Poopybutthole boasted. "Man, I think Wart scarred me for life." Tina said. "I know. I never saw anything so scary!" Gene trembled.

Bob tells the Subcon residents, "Welcome back to your home, Con-Yards!"

The Subcon people paused. "What did you just say?"

Rick and Morty watched the whole thing unfold. "Oh no! Looks like Bob is in for it now!" Rick said.

"Uhhh, Con-Yards?" Bob said innocently. "Bob! Didn't you recall what Rick said?" Linda told her husband.

The Subcon people begin to chase the Belchers and well as Mr. Poopybutthole. "Why did you say that!" Mr. Poopybutthole asked Bob.

"I thought that's what they were called." Bob answered. Rick opens a portal to the Steel Doors and all the Belchers and Mr. Poopybutthole fell out.

"God dammit Bob! Didn't tell you not to call the Subcon people Con-Yards!" Rick yelled at Bob. "I thought it was a complement." Bob defends himself. "My grandpa clearly said that Con-Yards was a racial slur to them!" Morty said. "Okay sorry. So I forgot!" Bob said.

Rick, Morty, and Mr. Poopybutthole decide to leave and go back home. "I don't know why I bothered with you Belchers anyway." Rick said. "We'll take our business somewhere else." Mr. Poopybutthole said. "Yeah, let's find a better family to put into Super Mario Bros. 2!" Rick said. "Agreed, Grandpa! These Belchers were pathetic!" Morty said.

The same slime green portal appears and Rick, Morty, and Mr. Poopybutthole all depart by going inside the spaceship from which they came. Leaving behind the Belcher family for good.

"Well, at least we're finally home now. Can't wait for Monday when we finally get some service." Bob said. "Don't talk to me for two hours, Bob! That goes for you too, Louise!" Linda said.

"I'm going to bed. I want to forget this ever happened." Tina said. "You and me both." Gene said.

Bob and Louise hung their heads in shame knowing that they both ruined the Subcon adventure. "So Dad. What can we do to make up for this?" asked Louise.

"I have no idea. I have a feeling they'll be mad at us for a long time." Bob said.

"Hopefully they'll forget." Louise said.

"Maybe this time they won't. They'll even remind us about it tomorrow." Bob says.

When Monday came, Bob went to his Bob's Burger's restaurant. Linda came to help him to help him work. She eventually forgave Bob. Tina, Gene, and Louise went back to school didn't tell a soul about their Sunday in Subcon. Louise was under strict orders for the next month to come home from school and not go anyplace else after. The Subcon disaster was soon forgotten. But the memory remains. Memories of POW Blocks, Shyguys, Tweeters, Ninjis, and Sniffets and Bob unknowingly using a sinful word.