Categories > TV > Star Trek: The Original Series > Star Infinity
Extra: Alternate Ending
0 reviewsThis is based on the ending of my video adaptation of the story.
0Unrated
Molly turns on the viewscreen, which shows what appears to be a gigantic pair of hot pink spheres with a circular door that resembles a diaphragm shutter just above them. A cross-section of the ship then appears, showing that the "balls" belong to a 69-kilometer starship in the shape of a curling iron.
Picard-Kirk facepalms, "Any semblance of dignity this parody may have had has just been blown out into space!"
Having transferred her science console's controls to the first officer's chair to keep an eye on the sensors, Rona sees something that makes her eyes grow wide. It is a stray hyperwarp core, which is on a direct course for the "curling iron with balls"! Scanning further, she discovers that the core once belonged to the doomed U.S.S. Fred Rogers.
"Lieutenant, get us out of here now! Maximum hyperwarp!" Rona orders.
"Say! I'm the captain here!" Picard-Kirk complains.
"When you say 'maximum hyperwarp', do you mean the highest safe speed, which would be hyperwarp factor thirteen or—?"
Rona bolts from the first officer's chair and practically throws Molly out of her chair as she takes over her station.
"Hey!" Molly shouts.
"You're relieved, Lieutenant," Rona says. She then performs a risky high-energy turn maneuver, pivoting the massive starship 180 degrees! This stresses the inertial dampeners and nearly throws everyone out of their seats! Then she engages the hyperwarp drive, the Enterprise clearing the cloud before the "curling iron with balls" explodes.
THE END . . . ?
NOT QUITE . . .
The lights and monitors on the Enterprise's bridge, including the viewscreen, go dark as the ship violently drops from hyperwarp. The blue emergency lights then activate.
"I had a feeling that this would happen," Rona says.
"What happened?" Tubman asks.
"Oh, nothing, just a shipwide systems breakdown," Rona answers.
Sonic rolls his eyes, "Oh, we are so relieved," he says sarcastically.
"Oh, hush! Anyway, I imagine that we will soon be hearing from our deputy chief engineer over the intercom," Rona responds.
As if on cue, Lizzie's voice comes over the intercom, "What in the H-E-double-hockey-sticks is going on over there!?"
"Yep, called it," Rona says.
Lizzie continues, "The computer just initiated an emergency core shutdown, and most of the ship's systems, including hyperwarp and hyper-impulse, are fried, which means we are pretty much dead in the water! The ship will likely need to be towed back to New Earth Spacedock! Can you imagine this gigantic hunk of junk being towed!? It boggles the mind!"
Rona pushes a button on the conn console, "Forgive me, Lieutenant. I initiated a one-hundred-eighty-degree high-energy turn—"
"Commander Burton, why are you at the helm!?" Lizzie interrupts, "Moreover, what were you thinking, pivoting this massive starship then punching it to hyperwarp!?"
"It was either that or get caught in the blast of a matter-antimatter explosion!" Rona replies.
Picard-Kirk wonders, "Pardon, but are the doors still working?" Larry then enters the bridge via the doors, answering Picard-Kirk's question.
"Never mind. I'm going to my ready room. Rona, you now have command of the ship for the remainder of the 'mission', I guess." A sad-looking Picard-Kirk leaves as a concerned Larry looks on. After the ready room doors close, Larry turns his attention to Rona, as Lizzie continues to curse over the intercom.
"Rona, did you just perform that little 'maneuver' you did that one time on the Enterprise-Z—the one that made Captain Ahab cringe every subsequent time you took the helm—back when you were the auxiliary flight controller?"
"Maybe—Larry, do you suppose that the self-destruct is still working?" Rona wonders.
"Did you just say self-destruct!?" Lizzie blurts.
"I did. Is it functioning?"
"Yes, but you're not seriously suggesting that—"
Lieutenant, be honest with me. Do you like this ship?
"No, in fact, I think it is the worst-designed piece of garbage I have ever set foot on. Its size is ludicrous. Its systems are so heavily automated that deviating just slightly from the default settings threatens to unravel everything. The entire middle section of the ship is a hollow cone with a lone mag-lev car. There are one hundred sixty decks in the fore section but only one that is actually complete and/or furnished. You know what? Let's scuttle her. Let's stick it to Sparky Brighton, that incompetent hack!"
A shout of "Huzzah!" can be heard over the intercom. Rona then cuts the channel and heads to the ready room.
"So much for the Enterprise-double-A," Sonic says.
"We barely knew her," Larry adds.
"The question is, though, did we ever really like her?" Tubman wonders.
Molly shrugs, "I thought she was all right."
Rona uses the door chime to the ready room. When Picard-Kirk does not answer, Rona overrides the doors and enters. Picard-Kirk is sobbing at his desk.
"Uh, Admiral?"
"Oh, uh, hello, Rona. May I help you?"
"How do you feel about helping me activate the self-destruct sequence?"
"We will most likely get court-martialed."
"Yeah, but it'll be worth it."
And so, Rona and Picard-Kirk activate the self-destruct sequence as the ship's personnel evacuate. The evacuation shuttles set a course for Earth and go to hyperwarp.
"Three . . ."
"Two . . ."
"One . . . Have a nice day!"
The Enterprise-AA explodes—or does it?
THE END
Picard-Kirk facepalms, "Any semblance of dignity this parody may have had has just been blown out into space!"
Having transferred her science console's controls to the first officer's chair to keep an eye on the sensors, Rona sees something that makes her eyes grow wide. It is a stray hyperwarp core, which is on a direct course for the "curling iron with balls"! Scanning further, she discovers that the core once belonged to the doomed U.S.S. Fred Rogers.
"Lieutenant, get us out of here now! Maximum hyperwarp!" Rona orders.
"Say! I'm the captain here!" Picard-Kirk complains.
"When you say 'maximum hyperwarp', do you mean the highest safe speed, which would be hyperwarp factor thirteen or—?"
Rona bolts from the first officer's chair and practically throws Molly out of her chair as she takes over her station.
"Hey!" Molly shouts.
"You're relieved, Lieutenant," Rona says. She then performs a risky high-energy turn maneuver, pivoting the massive starship 180 degrees! This stresses the inertial dampeners and nearly throws everyone out of their seats! Then she engages the hyperwarp drive, the Enterprise clearing the cloud before the "curling iron with balls" explodes.
THE END . . . ?
NOT QUITE . . .
The lights and monitors on the Enterprise's bridge, including the viewscreen, go dark as the ship violently drops from hyperwarp. The blue emergency lights then activate.
"I had a feeling that this would happen," Rona says.
"What happened?" Tubman asks.
"Oh, nothing, just a shipwide systems breakdown," Rona answers.
Sonic rolls his eyes, "Oh, we are so relieved," he says sarcastically.
"Oh, hush! Anyway, I imagine that we will soon be hearing from our deputy chief engineer over the intercom," Rona responds.
As if on cue, Lizzie's voice comes over the intercom, "What in the H-E-double-hockey-sticks is going on over there!?"
"Yep, called it," Rona says.
Lizzie continues, "The computer just initiated an emergency core shutdown, and most of the ship's systems, including hyperwarp and hyper-impulse, are fried, which means we are pretty much dead in the water! The ship will likely need to be towed back to New Earth Spacedock! Can you imagine this gigantic hunk of junk being towed!? It boggles the mind!"
Rona pushes a button on the conn console, "Forgive me, Lieutenant. I initiated a one-hundred-eighty-degree high-energy turn—"
"Commander Burton, why are you at the helm!?" Lizzie interrupts, "Moreover, what were you thinking, pivoting this massive starship then punching it to hyperwarp!?"
"It was either that or get caught in the blast of a matter-antimatter explosion!" Rona replies.
Picard-Kirk wonders, "Pardon, but are the doors still working?" Larry then enters the bridge via the doors, answering Picard-Kirk's question.
"Never mind. I'm going to my ready room. Rona, you now have command of the ship for the remainder of the 'mission', I guess." A sad-looking Picard-Kirk leaves as a concerned Larry looks on. After the ready room doors close, Larry turns his attention to Rona, as Lizzie continues to curse over the intercom.
"Rona, did you just perform that little 'maneuver' you did that one time on the Enterprise-Z—the one that made Captain Ahab cringe every subsequent time you took the helm—back when you were the auxiliary flight controller?"
"Maybe—Larry, do you suppose that the self-destruct is still working?" Rona wonders.
"Did you just say self-destruct!?" Lizzie blurts.
"I did. Is it functioning?"
"Yes, but you're not seriously suggesting that—"
Lieutenant, be honest with me. Do you like this ship?
"No, in fact, I think it is the worst-designed piece of garbage I have ever set foot on. Its size is ludicrous. Its systems are so heavily automated that deviating just slightly from the default settings threatens to unravel everything. The entire middle section of the ship is a hollow cone with a lone mag-lev car. There are one hundred sixty decks in the fore section but only one that is actually complete and/or furnished. You know what? Let's scuttle her. Let's stick it to Sparky Brighton, that incompetent hack!"
A shout of "Huzzah!" can be heard over the intercom. Rona then cuts the channel and heads to the ready room.
"So much for the Enterprise-double-A," Sonic says.
"We barely knew her," Larry adds.
"The question is, though, did we ever really like her?" Tubman wonders.
Molly shrugs, "I thought she was all right."
Rona uses the door chime to the ready room. When Picard-Kirk does not answer, Rona overrides the doors and enters. Picard-Kirk is sobbing at his desk.
"Uh, Admiral?"
"Oh, uh, hello, Rona. May I help you?"
"How do you feel about helping me activate the self-destruct sequence?"
"We will most likely get court-martialed."
"Yeah, but it'll be worth it."
And so, Rona and Picard-Kirk activate the self-destruct sequence as the ship's personnel evacuate. The evacuation shuttles set a course for Earth and go to hyperwarp.
"Three . . ."
"Two . . ."
"One . . . Have a nice day!"
The Enterprise-AA explodes—or does it?
THE END
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