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The Silent Cynic
By Dr. T

Chapter 9 – New York, New York and back.


While it was just over a three-hour drive from the Morgendorffers to Amy’s townhouse, she still managed to get Daria and Jane up and into her little car so they could leave shortly before 9:00. They stopped for a fast-food lunch, and coupled with some rest stops, they arrived a few minutes past 1:00. Amy checked her place over, adjusted the timing switches in various rooms on the off-chance someone was watching her house, and then called a cab to take the trio to the train station.

Knowing handling even small suitcases would be a problem, all three had their clothes packed away in slightly less-awkward backpacks. By 2:30, they had arrived at Penn Station. Even Daria and Jane, who were trying to look jaded or at least non-touristy, took a moment to gawk at the skyline before being coaxed by Amy into a cab.

Amy was friends with the manager of a Broadway theater, and he was spending the holidays trying to make deals in Hollywood for some of the projects he was involved in. He was lending them the small apartment he had access to a few blocks from Broadway. He had also helped them secure tickets to three shows and the Metropolitan Opera. Granted, the musical ‘Side Show’ was nearing the end of its short run, but all three enjoyed the story of the Siamese twins’ dilemmas a bit more than the general theater-going public had. Amy and Daria enjoyed a restaging of Chekhov’s ‘Ivanov,’ while Jane put up with it. None were thrilled by the remake of the commedia dell’arte ‘Triumph of Love.’ Again, Amy and Daria got more of Benjamin Brittan’s opera ‘Peter Grimes’ than Jane, but Jane did love the actual opera house. While none of the three were overly-thrilled by any of the four actual productions, each was glad of the experience, and Amy was especially happy to provide all the excursions to Daria and her friend.

Unsurprisingly, Jane much preferred the museums, even the American Museum of Natural History (which was the hardest one to get Daria to leave), to the four stage productions. Equally unsurprising, Jane was most in love with the Museum of Modern Art. Still, she was nearly as thrilled by the Guggenheim, the Whitney, and the Metropolitan Museum of Art. Daria and Amy enjoyed them nearly as much as Jane. The trio only wished they could have visited more of the many museums in the area.

The three also walked around different parts of Manhattan each day, mostly between Times Square and Central Park, taking photos of Daria and Jane in front of landmarks (like the Bethesda Fountain in Central Park) to the front of the New York Chess Club and a few pizza parlors the girls had enjoyed. They visited the Chrysler Building, the Empire State Building, and the World Trade Center, having dinner at the latter’s ‘Windows on the World’ restaurant. Daria and Amy had even managed to get Jane awake early enough to make it to the outside crowd at Rockefeller Center to see ‘The Today Show.’ (Since Amy had alerted Helen, Helen’s VCR captured the telecast, but it only yielded a few seconds of the trio on-screen.) They also not only ate lunch at the various pizza places but (curtesy of Amy’s connections) at Tavern on the Green and the Russian Tea Room (Jane hadn’t liked the caviar, while to her and Amy’s surprise, Daria had loved it). They even had cheesecake at Lindy’s. In short, Amy gave her niece and her friend as much of the stereotypical New York experience as possible. Granted, this ate up much of the money Amy had saved towards having a nice summer vacation, considering the cost of eating even bagels for most breakfasts or some dinners at Beefsteak Charlie’s in this part of Manhattan, but she did not begrudge a penny of it. Jane was over the top with adolescent glee most of the time. Daria was of course much less openly exuberant, but Amy had never seen her niece as happy for such an extended period of time.

Of course the news that Daria had recovered a slight use of her voice was the highlight of the week for Jane and especially Amy. The first person who had heard it was the new specialist that she had been referred to by the physicians in Texas, as she had encouraged Daria to try. That had been the first consultation Daria had had with her, and had occurred just a few days after Daria, who had been trying for weeks, produced her first if somewhat unintelligible weak whisper since the attack. The specialists in Texas had predicted that there was a fair chance that she would at least reach this stage, but had thought if it would happen it should have at least fifteen months previously. The new specialist had given her some revised advice on strengthening what little voice she had and had arranged for a checkup after three months.

Daria and Troy had not traded emails after Christmas night. Daria did not have access in New York, and Troy was actually at an invitational tournament in South America. It was his first major invitational and the first time he had travelled outside of the US or Ontario for a tournament. Six American players were being pitted against six South American players. Troy was the youngest player by a few months and youngest American, as well as the lowest-ranked player. (The US players were a Grandmaster, four International Masters, and one National Master – Troy. The South American players were two Grandmasters and four International Masters.)

As Jane and Daria rode the train out of New York the Sunday morning after New Year’s, Daria reflected on the changes in her life, and wondered which set had been greater. The first set of changes were the ones from ‘that night’ and her recovery (the physical injuries and mental emotional traumas, the immense difficulties in surviving Highland High, and on the positive side her relationship with Amy and improved relationship with Quinn). The second set stemmed from the move to Lawndale: a somewhat more supportive school and school population, a close friendship developing with Jane, a possible relationship with Troy, and some friendly people who might be becoming real friends (Mack, Jodie, Brittany, Paul, Tori, and maybe a few others). Daria thought both sets of changes were extreme, but these days, on reflection at least so far, the positives of the recent changes outweighed the negative, unlike the first set which had skewed towards the negative because of the climate at Highland High. Kevin and a few others were bothersome, but not to nearly the extent of the majority of Highland students (not counting Beavis and Butt-head, who were in a category all their own). Granted, Sandi would have fit into the large group of vicious girls who prowled the halls of Highland looking for anyone they could denigrate when they were not antagonizing if not outright attacking each other, but so far she was the only one that extreme in Lawndale. So, on the whole, she decided, even counting the damage to her voice, the recent positive changes outweighed the negatives of Highland.

*
NOTE on the New York shows: ‘Side Show,’ (Krieger & Russell), had 93 performances while ‘Ivanov’ only lasted 51 performances, closing January 3 & 4 respectively. ‘Comedy of Love’ (Magruder/Birkenhead) had 85 performances, and also closed January 4.
*

On their first day back in school, Daria and Jane of course met up with Troy and Paul before homeroom and made arrangements for pizza after school. (Helen had, slightly reluctantly, pre-approved the idea). Daria made it through English and History classes with no problems. Lunch was not very appetizing, nor was Calculus afterwards, but both were bearable. However, after Calculus was Science. Ms Barch had started a unit on psychological concepts, specifically the ideas of positive and negative reinforcement. Although she did not mention it, Barch was unhappy because Principal Li was again after her, demanding that she treat the boys less severely. In this case, that meant she had to assign cross-gender partners to these students.

She had originally considered assigning either Charles or Kevin to partner with Daria. They were both openly disgusting; they were not trying to hide how despicable they were, unlike Mack. Daria would know either of those two for what they were and deal with it. However, despite being a disgusting male hiding his evilness, Mack knew sign language. Kevin would likely be unable to understand what Daria wrote out for him, so he was out as a partner. Charles was possible, but in the end, she assigned him Jodie. Perhaps being exposed to Charles would make Jodi realize all males were disgusting. (Barch did not know Daria was seeing Troy.) Andrea got stuck with Kevin, much to her fury. Brittany was assigned Evan, whom Barch suspected of having most of the bad traits of the other boys in combination. The other combinations were equally thought out to cause maximum annoyance for most of the students. In the end, only Daria and Mack were both satisfied with their partners, although both were wise enough not to show it in class. No one else in the class liked the idea of the experiment assignment.

Daria and Mack decided to discuss the project the next morning during their activity period; it would certainly give them some different signs to exchange. Daria went off to her first meeting of the chess club that afternoon. The games were limited to 24 minutes (12 minutes per side). Daria played black against the usual #3 Board. To his surprise, Daria managed to be in a very superior position when his time ran out. While he therefore still lost, at least he did not have to resign or be checkmated.

On their way to get pizza, Daria and Jane told Troy and Paul about their trip to New York (Jane doing most of the talking, with Daria adding some commentary). They hit the highlights, but some of the details would have to wait until they had the photos developed. Once they hit Pizza Prince, the quartet broke into pairs.

‘We already told you a bit about New York,’ Daria signed after they ordered and claimed a table for two. ‘How was the Tournament?’

“The setup was pretty much like I suspected,” Troy answered. “On paper, the locals all had a 50 to a 120-point advantage, plus I was the only one of us from the East Coast. That meant the others were all a bit more jet lagged than I was, and I was a bit.” (The Argentine city they had played in was two hours ahead of the East Coast.) “I did the best for our team: three wins, three draws. I won two playing white, and I drew both Grand Masters.”

‘Do the three wins against International Masters mean you’re an International Master now?’

“I think so; FIDE will have to send me the confirmation,” Troy said, obviously excited by the prospect. “I was just a point short of the minimum for consideration, so I’m pretty sure I have the points, and the wins should confirm it. If not, I might just have to avoid losing to anyone ranked lower or drawing anyone more than a hundred points or so lower for a bit.”

‘Congratulations.’ Daria leaned across the table and kissed his cheek. When he moved to return the kiss, she gave his shoulder a slight push. ‘Pizza’s ready.’ She had her priorities, after all.

*
Later that evening, shortly after Daria has whispered her newly-recovered ability to her family….

“You should have told us weeks ago!” Helen yelled, not for the first time.

‘I….’ Daria started to sign.

“Stop that! You can talk, so TALK!”

“Mom….” Quinn started.

“QUIET!” Helen swung on Jake. “Not a word out of you, either.” She turned her attention back to the angry Daria. “Well, what do you have to say for yourself, young lady? What else are you holding back from me?” Scowling, breathing hard, Helen again loudly demanded, “WELL?”*

“Mother….” Daria just managed to whisper, her throat painfully tight from emotion.

Helen then fully lost her temper in frustration. Once again, Daria had turned to Amy first, and Helen also worried that Amy would not give Daria the pushes she needed. Daria had always been difficult and stubborn, from preschool onwards. She had never really wanted to talk; was this another excuse not to interact with others? “Damn it, SPEAK UP! What is WRONG with you?”

“I can’t….” Past angry, Daria tried to scream back at her mother, but that was as far as she got. Daria half coughed/half croaked a sound. Then she coughed again as her mother strode towards her, half-intending to shake her or at least yell some more at her daughter but even closer than she had been. Daria half coughed and half seemed to choke, and then coughed again. Therefore, Helen caught all of the small clot of blood on her white blouse. And then she caught two more, as the coughing/choking continued, and all three realized that Daria was choking on her own blood as she fell to her hands and knees. Another coughing spasm sent her fully onto the floor, blood now on the carpet and Helen’s shoes.

As Helen froze in panic and Jake tried to remember how to dial 911, Quinn got Daria to her knees so she was at least coughing out instead of choking, and then dialed 911.

*
RE: Helen’s tantrum – remember her angry reaction in the first episode ‘Esteemers’ to Daria’s being placed into the self-esteem class. Here, she’s at least as stressed, and of course jealous of Amy.

*

Late the next afternoon, Helen sat in the open area of the hospital wing Daria was in. This area was something of a pod, a three-quarter circle of rooms and a nurses’ station with an area of comfortable chairs around that center. There was even a TV and a microwave. Helen sat, her face in her palms, managing not to cry. Her impatience, her need to take control, had injured her daughter, or rather caused her daughter to injure herself in response to Helen’s actions. In the 21 hours since the incident, Helen had realized that while she did not blame Daria for her injury-acquired handicap, she had resented the extra effort it had taken her to learn sign language on top of all her work. She had resented having to meet with school administrators yet again, time after time, for Daria, albeit for new reasons after the attack. All that had bubbled up the night before, reinforced by her jealousy over Daria’s relationship with Amy and how Daria had acted before the incident. These combined, causing Helen’s over-reaction. She had ended up doing damage, physical as well as emotional, to happen to her daughter.

Helen cringed when she realized that someone was standing next to her, and that the someone was Amy. She had not contacted Amy, and Daria would have been unable to. Jake would not have. Most likely, Quinn had told Amy directly, or Jane had after Quinn had called her from the hospital the night before.

Seeing her sister had noticed her, Amy’s voice was cold. “If this had happened before last October, I would have your ass in court for abuse and endangerment. Shame on you. The only reason I would consider not hauling you into court now is because of Jane and Troy. Daria is finally growing emotionally, and it might hurt her more to remove her from Lawndale than leaving her here with you.”

Helen could only nod.

“Were you that jealous?” Amy asked. Seeing Helen’s puzzled look, Amy clarified, “Jealous that Daria told Jane and myself before you.”

Helen flushed, as she realized that this had actually been a stronger factor than the other causes she had admitted to herself. “Dammit,” she muttered. Helen looked up at Amy. “You’re probably right, although I didn’t see it.” She slammed her fist on the arm of the fortunately-padded chair she was sitting in. “This keeps coming back and biting me; sometimes I’m almost as bad as Jake.”

Amy of course knew about Jake’s emotional outbursts, and so just asked, “And what are you going to do about it?”

Helen grimaced, but acknowledged to herself that she could not risk acting like this again. “Go back to counselling,” Helen finally stated. “It helped all of us with the initial coping, but Jake and I both dropped out too soon. We needed to keep going beyond dealing with the immediate trauma.” Helen sighed. “I think Daria would rather hear that from you than deal with me at the moment. Tell her…well, I already apologized once. Tell her I’m calling the therapist back in Texas for a referral for myself. Once I start, I’ll ask Jake if he wants to restart as well. If Daria thinks she can benefit, tell her I’ll have a referral for her as well, but that it’s up to her. I’ll tell Quinn the same. If one of the therapists think we need family counselling, we will….” Helen caught herself. “No, if a therapist thinks we need family counselling, or if one of the girls do, we’ll talk it over as a family and decide what to do.”

Amy looked at her sister and considered for a moment. “All in all, that’s probably as good a plan as you can come with at the moment. Alright, I’ll go tell her.” Amy hesitated a moment, then put her hand on Helen’s shoulder. “On the one hand, I’ll be watching more closely. On the other, if Daria can forgive you, I certainly will as well.”

Helen merely nodded.

Amy smiled just a little, and a little sadly. “After all, sometimes the Curse of the Battling Barksdales bites me just as hard.”

*

Hearing the door to her room open, Daria rolled over into a fetal position, facing away from the door. She felt the person sit on her bed. “It’s alright, Sweetheart,” she heard Amy say.

Daria rolled over and found herself cuddled in Amy’s arms, her head on Amy’s lap. Daria did not cry, she was content to lie there being comforted. Hearing her Mother’s message, Daria could only nod, grateful that she was seeking help. Even in Daria’s worst case scenarios, she had underestimated her Mother’s reactions. If she was angry and hurt by those reactions, those feelings were eased a bit by knowing that Amy, Quinn, and her father had been to various degrees appalled and angered by them as well. That her Mother had recognized that she had reacted badly and incorrectly and was seeking help instead of in any way blaming Daria made it probable that forgiveness would be forthcoming.

After nearly fifteen minutes, Amy asked, “Is there anyone you want to see, or don’t want to?”

Daria sat up and replied, ‘In addition to you, I would be happy to see Jane, Quinn, or Troy. Dad, if he is calm, would be okay. Mom…if you are here. But does not your school start tomorrow?’

“Registration is tomorrow through Friday, and so are some meetings. First day of class is Monday, and I have permission to be away until then, since I already turned in my syllabi. I think I saw Jane hiding outside the ward. I’ll double check to see if you are allowed some hot tea. If so, Jane or I will bring you some. Helen went back to her office.”

Daria and Amy frowned identical half-frowns at that, but both knew that Helen was the main earner in the family. That had added to the guilt and pressure on her; it did not excuse her actions, but partially explained why they had been so near the surface. Amy stroked Daria’s cheek with a small smile, and then went in search of a nurse to ask about the tea.

Daria sat back on the raised bed and sighed.