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Chapter 9: Beginning the Healing Process

Kakashi opened his right eye. Aiko was stirring in her bassinet, making little crying noises. She had managed to wiggle out of the blanket that Sakura had so carefully swaddled her in four or five hours earlier. He glanced over at the clock. Amazing. They had actually managed to last until seven o'clock.

"Mmmm..." Sakura groaned beside him and started to sit up.

Kakashi rolled onto his back and grinned at her mop of disheveled pink hair. He was never going to get tired of seeing that. He reached over and pushed his fingers through her hair, tousling it gently. "I'll get her," he said.

Sakura started to scowl at him as she tried to put her hair into some sort of order, but then she looked at him anxiously. "Are you sure? Last time you tried to get up, you got really dizzy."

"That was yesterday. I can manage today." He sat up carefully, lowering his feet to the floor. So far, so good. He stood up slowly. Better and better. He glanced at the bandages that were still wrapped around his belly and his arm. No blood seeping from them. "See, no problem." He reached down into the bassinet and picked Aiko up out of her blanket, settling her into the crook of his elbow. He sat back down on the edge of the bed and looked down at her, smiling. He lightly tickled the palm of one of her hands with one finger, and she grasped it with a fairly good grip for somebody one week old.

Sakura sat up behind him and rested her hands on his shoulders. She pressed her cheek against his back and closed her eyes, enjoying the warmth of his body against her skin. During the first few days of his recovery, when he lay motionless, almost comatose, she was afraid he would never wake up. Now she had him back completely, but she still felt she had to convince herself that it was real. She felt a sob start to well up in her throat, but she held it back, although a tear escaped her eye. Kakashi could feel it between his shoulder blades. He looked over his shoulder at her.

"Sakura, what's the matter?" he asked, concerned.

"It's nothing," she replied, shrugging it off and smiling. "I'm just still kind of amazed that you're actually here."

Kakashi gave a quiet laugh. "You and me both." Looking back down at Aiko, he laughed again as the baby, feeling the bare skin of his chest against her cheek, turned her face towards him and started instinctively searching with her mouth. "Sorry, little one," he said. "That's one thing I can't deliver." He turned and handed Aiko to Sakura, who, after sitting back against a couple of propped up pillows, performed the now well-practiced ritual of slipping down one shoulder of her hospital gown and, leaning back against the pillows, putting the baby to her breast.

Kakashi leaned back on his elbows near Sakura's feet and admired this pleasant aspect for a while. It was the first thing he had seen when he regained consciousness early in the morning three days ago, and it had immediately struck him with a sense of rightness and tranquility. These last few days had been the most peaceful time he could ever remember in his entire life.

Adding to this was the fact that Tsunade, through a combination of wisdom and possibly a little guilt, had decided to give them their space, keeping her own visits to check on her three patients to a minimum and not allowing any other visitors for the time being. Sakura and the baby could have left the hospital a few days ago, but Kakashi had not yet been ready to be discharged, so she refused to leave him. However, although this hospital room had been their world for the past week, it was getting to the point where there really was no reason for them to stay much longer.

Kakashi considered this as he lay back and closed his eyes, idly stroking the top of one of Sakura's feet with his fingertips. "I suppose we're going to have to stop taking up valuable bed space and check out of here soon," he observed.

Sakura made no reply at first. When she did speak, her voice was subdued. "I'm not sure I want to leave."

Kakashi looked over at her. "I can see where you could really grow fond of the food here and the stylish hospital fashions, but I'm guessing there's a bit more to it than that."

Sakura shook her head and gave a slight, rueful smile. "I'm just not looking forward to appearing in public."

"Oh, come on," Kakashi chided gently. "You're not going to let a little gossip from a few miserable people who don't have anything better to do bother you, are you?"

"It wasn't a little gossip!" Sakura replied hotly. "Didn't you hear about it?"

"Well, I heard about it. I didn't get many details. I wasn't exactly being very communicative with my guards. I know a fair amount of crap got thrown around."

"Yes, it got pretty nasty," Sakura informed him. She scowled, looking down at Aiko contentedly nursing. "Stupid people!" she muttered. Her eyes flashed up at Kakashi again. "There was even a big fight at one of the sake bars!"

"A bar fight? Really?" Kakashi laughed. "Damn! I'm sorry I missed out on that!"

"Kakashi, it's not funny!" Sakura scolded him. "Half the village thinks you're a pedophile!"

Kakashi shrugged dismissively, then watched her for a moment. "And what does the other half think?"

Sakura avoided his gaze. She carefully turned Aiko around to switch to the other breast, rearranging her gown and settling back against the pillows.

Kakashi gave her foot a gentle squeeze. "Sakura, what else were people saying?"

"That I'm a slut," Sakura replied quietly and reluctantly. "That I did this to trap you."

Kakashi sat up. Sakura could see the expression on his face darken and he shook his head in disgust. "Damn it!" he muttered angrily. Then, anxiously concerned, he looked at her. "Please tell me you didn't take any of that seriously."

Sakura shook her head. "Of course not."

"You don't sound very convincing."

"Fine. No, I don't think I'm a slut." She looked back down at the baby for a few moments, passing her fingers over her downy pink head. She turned to him, her eyes grave. "Do you feel like I trapped you?"

Kakashi stared back at her in surprise. "No, I don't!" he told her firmly. "That never even occurred to me."

"It never occurred to me either until I started being accused of it!" Sakura replied unhappily. "Then I started to wonder if-"

"No!" Kakashi moved closer to her and took her face in his hands. "No, Sakura, don't ever think that!" He kissed her firmly. "Forget all that bullshit you heard! I love you because you're smart and strong and kind and beautiful! You and Aiko have become a part of me! You're my family!" He kissed her again, repeatedly and lingeringly, then he smiled. "If that's being trapped, I can't think of a sweeter prison."

Sakura closed her eyes and let out a long, slow breath with a profound sense of relief, letting go of all the tension that had been building up inside her. She smiled back at him and leaned closer to kiss him. "I love you, Kakashi," she whispered, her lips brushing against his.

With his fingers still softly touching her cheeks, Kakashi started to say, "Sakura, I wanted to-" but he was interrupted both by a light knock at the door and by Aiko popping herself off the nipple, apparently sated. Kakashi gave a sigh and then a quiet laugh as he bent down to kiss the baby on the side of her head. He got up from the bed and retrieved the blanket from the bassinet. Sakura reached out for it, but Kakashi slung it over his own shoulder. "My turn," he said, holding his arms out.

Smiling, Sakura carefully handed Aiko over to him and readjusted her gown while Kakashi carefully set the baby against his shoulder. "Come in," he said finally.

The door pushed open and Tsunade entered the room. She carried a couple of folders in one hand and a shopping bag in the other, both of which she deposited on the end of Sakura's bed. She smiled at the sight of the Copy Ninja with a pink and blue striped blanket and a baby draped on his shoulder, then said, "You ought to sit down. I don't want you suddenly passing out while you're holding the baby."

"I'm fine," Kakashi replied, walking slowly around the room and gently patting Aiko's back. "No dizziness, no spots before my eyes, couple of wounds still feel a little tender, nothing remarkable."

Tsunade shrugged and picked up one of the folders. She opened it and quickly wrote down some notes. "All right then. That's you." She looked over at Sakura. "And how is Mom feeling? Any problems with the nursing?"

"I'm good, and no problems," Sakura told her. She drew up her knees and wrapped her arms around them, something she hadn't been able to do for the past several months.

"Well, that was easy," Tsunade remarked, making a note in the other folder and closing it. She picked up the bag and handed it to Sakura. "Here are some things for the baby. There are a couple of things that Naruto and Hinata brought by as well."

"Thank you!" Pleased and surprised, Sakura took the bag and started pulling things out of it. She had felt bad about not really having anything prepared for the baby's arrival, having been either too embarrassed to go into the shops to buy them herself or too proud to ask someone else to. Delighted, she held up a little one-piece outfit that had a hood with little round ears attached to it. "Kakashi, look!"

Kakashi smiled warmly at her, then turned to Tsunade. "Thank you, Tsunade-hime." The Hokage gave a slight inclination of her head, acknowledging his use of her honorific without even the slightest trace of sarcasm. Kakashi seemed to weigh his words for a moment, then went on. "I have to tell you, Tsunade-hime, that although I don't for one minute regret anything we did, I think I understand now how you felt."

Tsunade raised an eyebrow. "Oh?" Sakura continued to inspect the baby gifts without looking up. Although this was not something either of them had mentioned to each other, she knew what Kakashi was going to say.

"I realized, literally overnight, how scary a place the world can become, and how protective of a child a parent has to be."

Tsunade gave a quiet sigh and smiled. "I really appreciate hearing you say that, Kakashi." She paused, then added, "After a while, I was starting to question my own judgment, but I don't think I could have done anything differently."

"No, I don't think you could have," Sakura said. She had been quietly sorting the clothes and blankets into two neat piles and had started putting them back into the bag. She looked up at the Hokage. The tension that had grown between them was gone, and they both felt that they may have grown closer. "It was hard for everybody, but you did what you had to do."

"I could have done without being bitch slapped," Kakashi said, mostly to himself.

Tsunade raised her hands and shrugged. "Yes, well, I'm sorry about that. I was seriously pissed at you. You have a beautiful baby, but I hope I never have to go through something like this again."

Aiko gave a little pop of a burp and Kakashi turned to Sakura. "Is that good enough?"

She laughed and said, "Sure, it'll do. Do you want to keep your winning streak going and change her diaper?"

"Of course." Kakashi lied, but he certainly wasn't going to back down in front of the Hokage. There were diapers on a shelf underneath the bassinet. Kakashi collected everything he needed and laid Aiko down on the other bed. Working solely from what he learned watching Sakura, and knowing he was being closely scrutinized, he spoke up to deflect some of the attention away from him. "So, to what else do we owe the pleasure of your company, Tsunade-hime?"

"Ah. Yes." Tsunade pulled a chair away from the wall, and placing it near Sakura's bed, she sat down. "I needed to discuss a few things with you, namely your plans for the immediate future. As Sakura's guardian," she added.

"You say that like you already have a few things in mind," Kakashi observed. Having finished with Aiko, he picked her up again and went over to the side of Sakura's bed. She slid over to make room for him to sit beside her. She took the baby from him and he put his arm around her.

"Well, yes, one or two things," Tsunade replied. She had to smile at the three of them together, and she sincerely hoped that they would understand what she had to tell them. "I don't know what you two have already discussed," she began.

Kakashi and Sakura glanced at each other. "We haven't really made any plans yet," Sakura replied quietly.

Tsunade nodded and went on. "There are certain concessions to-" she shrugged "-propriety, I suppose-that I need to make. You, Sakura, are a minor for another three months. Now please bear with me here, but even though you are, basically, a family, I can't actually allow you to live together as one until Sakura turns eighteen. You can certainly see each other!" she added hastily. "I'm not going to place any sort of restrictions on you as far as that goes. But logistically speaking, for the next three months, you'll be in separate residences. As far as I'm concerned, what you do during the day is your own business, bearing in mind," she added, switching from Hokage mode to medic mode, "that you, Sakura, need about another five weeks of recovery time before you can engage in intercourse." She gave a sigh and regarded them both anxiously. "Please tell me that makes sense to you."

"Well," Sakura began slowly after a pause, "it does sort of make sense." She looked at Kakashi for confirmation. He gave a slight shrug of acquiescence.

"I guess so," he said.

"Oh, good!" Tsunade said with relief. "Now, as far as the very immediate future is concerned, I don't see any reason to keep any of you here any longer. You all seem to be recovering well, and we can schedule some follow-up visits in a week or two." She looked from one to the other of them. "Do you feel ready?"

"I suppose," Sakura muttered grudgingly, and Kakashi gave her shoulders a squeeze. Tsunade looked at her questioningly and she said, "I'm just not really looking forward to peoples' reactions when we have to go back out into the world."

Tsunade groaned wearily. "I understand. I couldn't go around telling people how to think, but after the barroom brawl-" She raised an eyebrow at Kakashi as he gave a slight snort of a laugh, "-I gave a few people the benefit of my wisdom." She shrugged. "Beyond that, just go out there and balls it out. Although bear in mind..." She stood up and took the hooded baby outfit from the gift bag and held it up. "...the cute factor goes a long way."

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A few hours later, both Sakura and Kakashi were finally out of their hospital attire and were in clothes that had been retrieved for them. Sakura had already packed a bag in anticipation of this event, and Kakashi's wardrobe consisted mostly of a few changes of his jonin uniform. His forehead protector sat back at its usual angle across his left eye, but his mask sat gathered beneath his chin. They had spent the past few hours quietly, even dozing off for a while, since neither of them had been getting a full night's sleep for the past several days.

Kakashi stood nearby and watched Sakura dress Aiko in her new outfit. She picked her up and smiled as she admired how cute Aiko looked with the pink hood framing her face. Fed and changed, she seemed content, and Sakura laid her back in her bassinet.

Kakashi stepped up behind Sakura and put his arms around her. She leaned back against him, resting her hands on his forearms. "Nervous?" Kakashi asked her, bringing his mouth close to her ear.

Sakura shrugged. "A little."

"It'll be fine," he assured her.

"Hmm," Sakura replied noncommittally.

"Everyone is just going to have to get used to us. They might as well start now." Kakashi kissed her hair and rested his cheek against her head. He closed his eyes and savored this moment, delighting in the feeling of being able to have her in his arms again. "Sakura, there's something I want to ask you." he said after a while. "And I want you to know that I'm not asking this because I think I ought to, or because I might as well, or because it's expected of me. I'm asking this because I love you and because I don't want anyone to be able to separate us again and because I couldn't bear losing you to someone else because I was too stupid to ask you." Sakura turned around in his arms and looked up at him questioningly. "Will you marry me?"

Sakura's eyes widened slightly. She started to smile a little, then her expression became solemn and she wound her arms around his waist. "I want you to know that I'm going to say yes not because I think I have to save my reputation or because I was hoping you would ask or because I wanted to trap you into asking me." Her smile returned. "I want to say yes because I love you and because no one has ever made me feel so cherished and because I always want to wake up with you next to me. So...yes."

Their arms tightened around each other and they kissed, lightly at first, then growing deeper and more passionate. Kakashi kissed her along her jaw, then down the side of her neck. Her back arched as he held her closer, almost pulling her off her feet.

"Five weeks, huh?" he whispered, brushing his lips around the edge of her ear.

"Yeah," Sakura whispered back. As Kakashi turned to the other side of her face and down her throat, she said, "Kakashi..."

"Hmm?"

"How would you feel about waiting another six weeks after that?"

Kakashi paused and looked into her face. He considered what she said for a moment, then a smile grew on his face. "You want to wait until our wedding night?"

Sakura nodded and kissed him lightly on the lips. "Thanks for understanding."

"Well, we've waited this long. It'll be worth it."

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AN: I found this chapter very difficult, as I was trying to get certain things accomplished and set a certain mood here without becoming anticlimactic. Please let me know what you think. There is a bit more to come.