Categories > Theatre > Rent

Moo With Me

by minkhollow 0 reviews

Crossover with Doctor Who: In which Maureen spends some time... abroad, and puts it to practical use.

Category: Rent - Rating: PG - Genres: Crossover, Humor, Sci-fi - Characters: Maureen - Warnings: [!] [?] - Published: 2006-11-04 - Updated: 2006-11-04 - 981 words - Complete

Moo With Me

Crossover with Doctor Who: In which Maureen spends some time... abroad, and puts it to practical use.

DISCLAIMER: Not mine; just borrowing. Will return when finished.

"Nicely done."

"Of course it was. I think we've only got about five minutes before they catch on, though. Ten at the very most. We should get out of here."

"Quite right."

"Are people always that touchy about flirting?"

"Not everyone is quite so... liberal in their romantic pursuits as you are, even on Earth."

"...Well, I guess you've got a point there. But still, I wasn't expecting to stir up that much trouble. I just thought she was cute!"

"You mistook her for a man at first, and you're wondering why she reacted like that?"

"But I... well... that's beside the point."

"Do try to save the amorous advances for your young man when I take you home."

"You ruin all my fun."

"The pout will not work on me. Now, after that... incident, I think somewhere rather quieter is in order."


The studio idea's something they all used to kick around in their spare time; just another pipe dream, like Collins' restaurant, that no one seriously expected to ever get off the ground.

But when Benny finally gets the means to do it, the way he prattles on about it immediately puts Maureen in mind of Cyberland. This, she thinks, is something of a problem, doubly so since that means it doesn't sound half as cool.

And she's been to Cyberland, so she'd know. It's a deserted dump of a place; the sky reminded her of the screens on those glorified typewriters calling themselves high technology from middle school. In fact, probably the only thing Cyberland's got going for it is it's not where Cybermen come from. Maureen hadn't known the importance behind the distinction when the Doctor first told her, and there are nights when she wishes she'd never found out.

But these things happen, and in its way it strikes her as a good place to start writing a protest of the whole studio affair. Her resolve only strengthens when word gets out that Benny's planning to clear out the tent city - and, more importantly, her performance space - by New Year's. If she's going to act, now is the time, so she starts writing.

There aren't really highly metaphorical bulldogs - she really, really hopes K-9 can forgive her - and she thinks the local drink of choice is something a lot harder to pronounce than Diet Coke. But the cow is very real. Last Maureen heard, Elsie was happily settled at a dairy farm in California, but she rarely eats red meat these days anyway. Just in case.

And aside from the fact that she only lost about three days in New York time, there's a reason she hasn't told anyone about the guy with the unfortunate hair, doubly unfortunate scarf, and time-traveling not-really-a-phone-booth. Mark would just tell her to give back his copy of /Bill and Ted's Excellent Adventure/, and everyone else would chalk it up to her being nuts as usual. In this case, though, she's pretty sure 'last night, I had a dream' will cover her tracks.


By Christmas Eve, it's even more personal than a former friend turning traitor to the cause. Apparently, Benny's idea of an appropriate contribution from the people who helped come up with the studio is rent money he knows Mark and Roger don't have. If she weren't already planning to do the protest that night, she'd have bumped it up just for that.

The protest goes off without a hitch, despite the digital delay nearly exploding on Joanne, or something like that. Mark fixed it, at any rate. And the call for mooing is a hit; she can't help noticing it's first taken up by a mostly unfamiliar guy in a leather jacket. She doesn't recognize him outright, but there's something about the ears.

And there's more than something about the blue phone booth that wasn't outside the Life Cafe last weekend. She's not all that surprised when Leather Jacket Guy comes out, after the rest of her friends have gone inside the building, and says, "Quite the intriguing extrapolation on the theme, I thought."

Maureen grins. "Seemed appropriate, under the circumstances. See you finally lost the scarf."

"That was several regenerations ago. Do try to keep up."

"Well, in that case, what took you so long to come and visit?"

"You know how it is. One never has enough time to do all the things one wants."

"Right, right. Says the guy with a time machine. Don't suppose you've been cured of your regrettable tendency to save the world all the time, have you?"

"Why would I ever do a silly thing like that?"

"You'd think dying a bunch of times would get through to a guy eventually."

"I seem to recall you could keep your head in a crisis."

"Well, yeah, but I still prefer stirring up trouble to doing the dirty work. Besides..." Maureen pauses, looking at the door to the Life. "I have plenty of crusades without leaving the planet again."

"Have you, then?"

"Some of my friends are dying, Doctor. If I can't do much to change that, the least I can do is try to keep a roof over Mark and Roger's heads. Even if it's a roof with shit insulation and a broken skylight."

"You forget, I think, the connections you have at your disposal."

She can't have heard that right, or if she did, she's reading too much into it. "Wait, did you just offer to..."

"This would be the immunodeficiency plague, yes?" The Doctor grins widely. "I might have something, though I think I'd like to meet your friends first."

"You're serious?"

"Look at it as a Christmas gift, if you want."

Maureen beams. "Come on. This calls for a celebration."
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