Categories > Books > Harry Potter > Dear Order
Letter Four
8 reviews"Would anyone mind terribly if I joined Voldemort?" Teensy bit of slash in this chapter. Barely there, really.
5Funny
Dear Order
Or, Twenty-One Letters to the Order of the Ugly Duckling
Letter Four - "Would anyone mind terribly if I joined Voldemort?"
The usual group occupying the Headquarters of the Order of the Phoenix were currently in a highly unusual situation.
They were on the roof.
All eighteen of them.
None of them were entirely certain as to how they had gotten there, although Molly suspected the twins on principle.
Albus, on the other hand, was fairly certain that Severus and Remus had been experimenting with spells again, and had thusly caused this strange, sudden displacement.
No one else ascribed to this theory due to the rather compromising position the two men had been in when they had arrived on the roof.
It had been rather amusing, actually. Ron had screamed, while Neville, Arthur and everyone of the female persuasion (barring Luna) had blushed violently. Moody, Kingsley and the older Weasley boys had all just burst out laughing.
Albus had just blinked at the two naked, wet men in shock. Now there was something he hadn't expected!
Luna just smirked. A little smugly, in fact, but no one noticed this.
Remus had shrieked slightly and attempted to hide himself behind Severus, which caused the other man to glare rather fiercely at him through his dripping hair. Both of them were blushing.
All over.
Minerva had been the first to recover her wits (besides Luna, who was too busy being smug and enjoying the view to bother helping) and had quickly conjured them each a robe, which the two men donned immediately.
Once everyone had gotten over the fact that the werewolf and the potions master had appeared on the roof dripping wet and snogging heavily, or was at least pretending to be over it (or was suppressing their recent memories), talk quickly turned to the other thing that had just happened.
Namely, their sudden appearance on the roof.
It wasn't as though anyone had actually moved from where they had been. Oh no, it had been a spontaneous appearing act, in which everyone in the house had been magically transported from their previous activities and directly dumped on the top of the house.
Supposedly, not a single one of them had any idea of how they had arrived there.
Of course, no one even bothered to ask Luna, who was gazing dreamily off into the distance. If they had, they would have probably received a smug smirk and an admission of culpability.
But they didn't.
So Luna kept silent, her eyes on the distant speck in the sky that was gradually growing into a snowy owl.
Eventually, the immature bickering that might have been mistaken as calm, collected discussion (at least by those involved) began to dwindle off as the others on the roof gradually noticed Hedwig heading their way.
By the time she arrived at the roof, there was nothing but silence as everyone waited to see whose shoulder she would perch on.
Hedwig, for once, didn't seem to have a particular destination. She circled them a few times in consideration before landing on the top of Kingsley's bald head, it being the highest perch there.
Kingsley winced and coaxed the owl down onto his shoulder, making a mental note to have a discussion with Harry concerning his evil-minded familiar. He ignored the blood trickling down his neck from Hedwig's landing and removed the letter.
He read it. He blinked a few times. He read it again. He snorted.
"What, what, what?" Tonks demanded, bouncing on the balls of her feet in curiosity.
Kingsley cleared his throat and read the letter aloud.
"'Dear Order,
Am hoping that you're all in good health, and that Professor Snape delivered my message to the Headmaster.'"
Kingsley paused as several members of his audience snickered.
"'I've been thinking. Would anyone mind terribly if I joined Voldemort? I get the feeling that he doesn't randomly leave people stuck in a house with the Dursleys for the entire summer with no contact with sentient human beings.
I'm sure he and I can work through our issues, and his little killing people thing.
Love Harry'"
Everyone stared at him.
"You don't think he's.../serious/, do you?" Charlie asked with a worried frown.
Neville snorted. "Of course he isn't. At least, he isn't /yet/."
"In that case," Severus began, tone irritated. "Can we work on getting /off the roof/? I still have shampoo in my hair."
Or, Twenty-One Letters to the Order of the Ugly Duckling
Letter Four - "Would anyone mind terribly if I joined Voldemort?"
The usual group occupying the Headquarters of the Order of the Phoenix were currently in a highly unusual situation.
They were on the roof.
All eighteen of them.
None of them were entirely certain as to how they had gotten there, although Molly suspected the twins on principle.
Albus, on the other hand, was fairly certain that Severus and Remus had been experimenting with spells again, and had thusly caused this strange, sudden displacement.
No one else ascribed to this theory due to the rather compromising position the two men had been in when they had arrived on the roof.
It had been rather amusing, actually. Ron had screamed, while Neville, Arthur and everyone of the female persuasion (barring Luna) had blushed violently. Moody, Kingsley and the older Weasley boys had all just burst out laughing.
Albus had just blinked at the two naked, wet men in shock. Now there was something he hadn't expected!
Luna just smirked. A little smugly, in fact, but no one noticed this.
Remus had shrieked slightly and attempted to hide himself behind Severus, which caused the other man to glare rather fiercely at him through his dripping hair. Both of them were blushing.
All over.
Minerva had been the first to recover her wits (besides Luna, who was too busy being smug and enjoying the view to bother helping) and had quickly conjured them each a robe, which the two men donned immediately.
Once everyone had gotten over the fact that the werewolf and the potions master had appeared on the roof dripping wet and snogging heavily, or was at least pretending to be over it (or was suppressing their recent memories), talk quickly turned to the other thing that had just happened.
Namely, their sudden appearance on the roof.
It wasn't as though anyone had actually moved from where they had been. Oh no, it had been a spontaneous appearing act, in which everyone in the house had been magically transported from their previous activities and directly dumped on the top of the house.
Supposedly, not a single one of them had any idea of how they had arrived there.
Of course, no one even bothered to ask Luna, who was gazing dreamily off into the distance. If they had, they would have probably received a smug smirk and an admission of culpability.
But they didn't.
So Luna kept silent, her eyes on the distant speck in the sky that was gradually growing into a snowy owl.
Eventually, the immature bickering that might have been mistaken as calm, collected discussion (at least by those involved) began to dwindle off as the others on the roof gradually noticed Hedwig heading their way.
By the time she arrived at the roof, there was nothing but silence as everyone waited to see whose shoulder she would perch on.
Hedwig, for once, didn't seem to have a particular destination. She circled them a few times in consideration before landing on the top of Kingsley's bald head, it being the highest perch there.
Kingsley winced and coaxed the owl down onto his shoulder, making a mental note to have a discussion with Harry concerning his evil-minded familiar. He ignored the blood trickling down his neck from Hedwig's landing and removed the letter.
He read it. He blinked a few times. He read it again. He snorted.
"What, what, what?" Tonks demanded, bouncing on the balls of her feet in curiosity.
Kingsley cleared his throat and read the letter aloud.
"'Dear Order,
Am hoping that you're all in good health, and that Professor Snape delivered my message to the Headmaster.'"
Kingsley paused as several members of his audience snickered.
"'I've been thinking. Would anyone mind terribly if I joined Voldemort? I get the feeling that he doesn't randomly leave people stuck in a house with the Dursleys for the entire summer with no contact with sentient human beings.
I'm sure he and I can work through our issues, and his little killing people thing.
Love Harry'"
Everyone stared at him.
"You don't think he's.../serious/, do you?" Charlie asked with a worried frown.
Neville snorted. "Of course he isn't. At least, he isn't /yet/."
"In that case," Severus began, tone irritated. "Can we work on getting /off the roof/? I still have shampoo in my hair."
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