Categories > Books > Harry Potter > Beyond the Veil
Chapter 4
Sirius looked about and noted that Lily and James were indeed gone. They had assured him that the journey ahead was going to be hard, and they had gone as far as they could with him. They said that they would meet him at the end. Their words as they parted were full of emotions that Sirius wished not to live again. Lily was too overcome with emotion to speak anymore, but James offered him good luck on the tasks ahead. They said goodbye and sank into the mist that was beginning to roll over the stone floor. Sirius desperately wanted to call them back; he had the feeling that he was going to need them for this. He needed someone.
Desperately, he looked around the chamber, but all that met his eyes were stone walls and solid floor. Something was happening, he didn't know what or from where, but acute sense started to kick in, sending all sorts of signals to his body.
The mist continued to rise and Sirius had pulled out his wand and held it at the ready. A roaring crescendo was beginning to roll loudly in his head. He closed his eyes and tried to will the noise away, but it only became more persistent. At that point, Sirius became acutely aware of his internal organs. It was as if he had swallowed himself. He came to rest on his heart. It pulsed it's normally crooked beat. He began to feel the piece of raw power that it was. It was large for a man, it seemed to occupy far more of his chest cavity than he was sure was normal. It beat fast and strong. He remembered that even as the Dementors tried to stop it, it never failed. He was suddenly in awe of this one organ. It gave him the life that he needed, but it also gave him much more. This was the power that simmered under the surface. This was what he supposed he was looking for. It started to heat up. The roar became louder and Sirius fought to open his eyes, he had to pull away from this power, it was trying to surpass him. The roaring was his heartbeat in his ears, deafening and strong. It was almost as though he were already fighting with himself, and the omen was not a good one.
+++++++
When he opened his eyes he was in the Shrieking Shack. Here was where he and his friends had spent a good three days of each month back in school. The nostalgia that coursed through him was almost soothing, it kept the fear inside of himself at bay. Why did it seem that many of those full moons had fallen on his weekend? Whatever, he grinned at the happy memories, when things had seemed less complicated.
He was startled when Moony suddenly burst into the room. Poor Wormtail barely had time to run for cover to escape the giant lycan paws that were stomping the room at full force. Ah, it must have been a clear night; Moony was at his peak. This was when the fun began. Prongs bounded into the room behind him, his hooves taking chunks out of the already battered floor. A black dog he knew to be himself was following right behind. This was the part of the night that they would have to corner Moony to keep him from escaping into the streets. Which they sometimes did, to the horror of the town below.
Prongs had pinned Moony against a wall and was keeping him there with the threat of sharp antlers. Sirius envied James's animagus form. While he was a large shaggy dog, Peter became a rat, Remus was a giant werewolf, but James became an awesome stag. He had a mature gown rack of antlers, and without him, none could keep Remus in check. So as it went, James usually had the task of corralling Moony at his worst. This usually kept James in the hospital wing for a day or so after the event, sometimes from pure exhaustion. And the git still managed to find time for his studies, time to harass Lily, time to practice Quidditch and still hang out with his friends! Sirius was more than a mite jealous of James then.
A light humming was ebbing in the back of his brain. It was like someone was stroking the low octave of a violin. Sirius never listened much to the violin, silly muggle contraption. But he was comforted by the sound now. The more of the jealousy he let rise to the surface, the more beautiful the music became. He closed his eyes and leaned back into it.
As he opened his eyes he knew a new scene would rise to meet him. He wondered vaguely if he was subconsciously bringing up these events. He shook the thought away and gazed at the scene before him. His younger self was manacled to a chair, impervious to any magic he attempted. His wand was broken in front of him, but he still fought. He realized that this made him look guiltier than he was, but he knew that this hearing was wrong. He saw members of the Order file into the room. None would meet his eyes. He remembered the rage he felt at that. He thought that they would know he was innocent. His blood boiled at the thought. One of them could have given him a sign, not leave him in the darkest spot in his life with nothing to hope for. Steadily, the thrumming in his head progressed.
That damnable Amelia Bones was reading off the list of atrocities performed by Peter and Merlin knew whom else. It was long. There was also a petition from the governor's council to have the Dementor's kiss performed right there. Dumbledore stood and calmly dismissed this petition. He came to the front and addressed the panel. He informed them that as bad as the crimes were, there was no a shred of evidence that they were indeed committed by Sirius. The panel murmured amongst themselves and Amelia Bones seemed deep in thought for a long time. She then laid the sentence that sent him to Azkaban. Dumbledore looked at him sadly. He then raised his eyes to where Sirius was now standing. He gave a small nod and returned to his seat. On his right was Mad Eye Moody.
So they knew that he would be here at this time. How? He had never been acknowledged in his former visions. He was certain that Dumbledore could probably see him in the kitchen at Grimmauld Place then. But why was he not saying anything then?
As a Dementor floated in, the thought vanished from his mind. A pair of rotted hands took hold of his former screaming body. As all of his emotions floated out of him, he watched as he slumped and was dragged from the room. He was suddenly overcome with the burning. How could they! And they knew it was wrong! He didn't do it! He let the anger rise. It bubbled up from somewhere in his gut. The violin inside his head started playing a frenzied tune, and he fed its fire with more and more anger.
These were the experiences that made him who he was. This was the life of Sirius Black. This was what shaped him. The scorn, the lies, the pain. He felt all of it course through him, let it enter his heart and felt it get stronger. He was feeding the flame and he knew that was dangerous. Again he closed his eyes, wanting to be away from the source. This violence he was normally able to push aside within him threatened to break its chains and rise. He had to see something else.
He opened them to a room that he never saw before. A vaulted ceiling rose into the air and shelves of books lined the walls. The furniture was lavish and looked expensive. He saw a fireplace and a plush black velvet armchair in front of it. He came around and looked at who was sitting in it. He came face to face with Voldemort. His piercing red eyes gazed at the fire. Voldemort's long fingers came to a steeple under his chin. He was thinking of something. His face broke into a smile. A sneer actually. Sirius hated him. There was more to it than that. He watched as Voldemort rose from his chair. His hair was slicked back, his red eyes burning bright. He spoke to a woman who had just appeared at the door. Sirius was not surprised to see that it was Narcissa.
"Come, we have a journey ahead of us. This is the day that we begin to live as we should." He motioned for Narcissa to come to him. Her belly was large under her robes. Sirius felt the shock wave hit him. He gasped as Voldemort stopped short. Sirius was facing his back.
Voldemort casually turned his head to the side. "Alas, Narcissa, it's too bad that your beloved relative Sirius could not be here to witness our greatest accomplishment. But I'm sure wherever he is, he's watching." Narcissa looked bewildered. She hadn't considered Sirius Black her family for years! But she shook it off and took Voldemort's arm as they approached the door. "I should be more careful what I wish for!" He said before he slammed the door behind him.
Sirius was confounded. Could everyone see him?! What was this? He thought he was an invisible presence, and here, Voldemort had just spoken to him. But Narcissa was oblivious, she had looked right through him. What was the meaning of this? He chewed his lip trying to explain it and he was whisked away to another location.
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He was in the open air this time. He felt a breeze at his back. He knew where they were. Diagon Alley. He was on the side of the road. People walked past him, not looking at him. In fact, they weren't looking up at anything. Their eyes stayed focused to the ground and they hustled from shop to shop. The sun was shining hot on his shoulders. Students were in the streets, many carried packages with books. Sirius gathered that the new school year was beginning. This was the street that he had seen before. The Leaky Cauldron was still closed. The only shops open were Ollivanders, and Flourish and Botts. He wondered why students were even bothering to go, obviously there was nothing for them after they graduated.
And then there was Harry. He emerged from a side door and walked into the street. Flanked by the most powerful Aurors, he had his head down. Sirius wanted to yell at them. He wondered why they had Harry out in public. As if in answer to his question, Harry raised his head defiantly. And Sirius knew that Harry had demanded it. They were so much alike. Sirius had no time to try to warn them. He looked on as Voldemort walked out of what used to be the Leaky Cauldron. He walked swiftly to Harry and bowed elegantly in front of him. Sirius moved closer to hear what was being said.
Narcissa was not far behind Voldemort. The Aurors were thrown from Harry's side with a flick of Voldemort's wrist. They approached again, to the same effect. Harry whipped out his wand. Students realizing what was happening began to flee. Voldemort snorted at his wand. Another flick of his wrist brought Harry closer to him. He started to speak.
"The prophecy will be realized today. I have awaited this moment for a long time, old friend." Voldemort's voice was low and sinister, the words undulating like a snake's. He kept his gaze on Harry.
"You have no idea what the prophecy says, it was destroyed." Harry defiantly stood his ground, wand raised. Sirius marveled at how he hadn't noticed how Harry had become the image of his father. He was a man now, more than ever. With his feet soundly on the ground, and his head high in the air, Sirius could almost see that proud rack of antlers and defiant countenance that made his father such a formidable opponent when the need arose. Sirius was dismayed at all of the wasted years that he and James should have spent with him. Gone.
"Oh, Harry. All that anger that you have entertained these past months has fed it to me. Every line of it that you anguished over, made it mine. Especially the line 'and either must die at the hand of the other for neither can live while the other survives'. Yes, this one troubles you the most. I know it, I can feel it. Do you have the power to murder me now that I am a human? Is it in you? I doubt it." His face became a smiling monster in front of Harry. "Killing is an adult business, Harry. You have to mean it to do it."
Sirius felt pride flow through him as his godson stood taller, even venturing a step closer.
"Crucio!" Harry himself did not even recognize his voice. It erupted from his throat in an ugly voice deep like a man's. The spell exploded from the end of his wand. Voldemort took a small step back at the force of the spell, but did not fall. Harry also felt the spell in his head, for he said, "What's the matter, can't show us how much it hurts? CRUCIO!" The spell doubled. Voldemort struggled and stood taller. Sirius realized in that moment that Harry wasn't a man, he was still a child. He looked so small as his confidence faltered and the pain in his own head increased. Voldemort must have sensed that the pain he was feeling was rebounded in Harry himself.
"Well Harry, who will break first, you or I?" He raised a hand "CRUCIO!" The spell hit Harry head on, but the boy didn't lose his footing. His face contorted in pain, but he held his wand firm. Voldemort's shoulders began to fall, and he held up his other hand.
"Harry! You're going to kill yourself if you kill him!" Arthur ran forward, wand raised, fear in his eyes. "It's just as Dumbledore said, you are linked!" He aimed at Voldemort, who already had a hand raised, "Stupefy!"
Arthur was thrown to the ground, his fall interrupted with a crucio curse from Narcissa. He screamed as he hit the ground and rolled. His last thought was protecting Harry as he lost consciousness. His body was smoking from the force of the curse, but Sirius knew from his previous vision that he was not dead.
Harry dropped his curse at the same time as Voldemort. Both were out of breath, Harry slightly more. As if he knew that this was the final battle, he threw his wand to the ground. Narcissa had transformed and was perched on the shoulder of Voldemort. Harry's eyes widened as she cawed at him. It was a dirty sound. It made everyone in the general vicinity flinch. She flapped her wings and rose to the sky. She had reached an impressive height and as they all looked on, a brilliant red Dark Mark lingered in the air behind her. What bystanders had lingered long enough now fled screaming.
Voldemort positively towered over Harry now. He raised his hands and Harry rose to his full height. He knew that this was all to end all. He just hoped that he had the power within him to fight. Red beams showered from Voldemort's hands. As they all watched in horror, Harry faltered.
As though he were feeling what Harry was feeling all over again, Sirius caught a glimpse of the final thoughts of the boy. He longed to lie beside his parents and see Sirius again. Sirius tried yelling that he wasn't dead, but that only made Voldemort laugh harder and gave him more power. Harry's body began to crumble. Smoke began to emanate from his pores. Sirius glanced at Voldemort. Blood was pouring from his nose and mouth, He was damn near killing himself. Sirius was amazed at how red the blood was and how much of it there was. And his own blood started to boil. Sirius saw Harry look directly at him as he fell to the ground erupting into flames.
The flames seemed to satisfy Voldemort. He nudged Harry's body with his foot. Nothing. He turned to look at the Aurors. Dumbledore stood among them. Albus gasped as he saw Voldemort's face. Aside from the blood, he looked as though nothing happened. As he turned to look at Sirius, he felt his stomach drop violently. For on his forehead was a peculiar lightning shaped scar.
Sirius looked about and noted that Lily and James were indeed gone. They had assured him that the journey ahead was going to be hard, and they had gone as far as they could with him. They said that they would meet him at the end. Their words as they parted were full of emotions that Sirius wished not to live again. Lily was too overcome with emotion to speak anymore, but James offered him good luck on the tasks ahead. They said goodbye and sank into the mist that was beginning to roll over the stone floor. Sirius desperately wanted to call them back; he had the feeling that he was going to need them for this. He needed someone.
Desperately, he looked around the chamber, but all that met his eyes were stone walls and solid floor. Something was happening, he didn't know what or from where, but acute sense started to kick in, sending all sorts of signals to his body.
The mist continued to rise and Sirius had pulled out his wand and held it at the ready. A roaring crescendo was beginning to roll loudly in his head. He closed his eyes and tried to will the noise away, but it only became more persistent. At that point, Sirius became acutely aware of his internal organs. It was as if he had swallowed himself. He came to rest on his heart. It pulsed it's normally crooked beat. He began to feel the piece of raw power that it was. It was large for a man, it seemed to occupy far more of his chest cavity than he was sure was normal. It beat fast and strong. He remembered that even as the Dementors tried to stop it, it never failed. He was suddenly in awe of this one organ. It gave him the life that he needed, but it also gave him much more. This was the power that simmered under the surface. This was what he supposed he was looking for. It started to heat up. The roar became louder and Sirius fought to open his eyes, he had to pull away from this power, it was trying to surpass him. The roaring was his heartbeat in his ears, deafening and strong. It was almost as though he were already fighting with himself, and the omen was not a good one.
+++++++
When he opened his eyes he was in the Shrieking Shack. Here was where he and his friends had spent a good three days of each month back in school. The nostalgia that coursed through him was almost soothing, it kept the fear inside of himself at bay. Why did it seem that many of those full moons had fallen on his weekend? Whatever, he grinned at the happy memories, when things had seemed less complicated.
He was startled when Moony suddenly burst into the room. Poor Wormtail barely had time to run for cover to escape the giant lycan paws that were stomping the room at full force. Ah, it must have been a clear night; Moony was at his peak. This was when the fun began. Prongs bounded into the room behind him, his hooves taking chunks out of the already battered floor. A black dog he knew to be himself was following right behind. This was the part of the night that they would have to corner Moony to keep him from escaping into the streets. Which they sometimes did, to the horror of the town below.
Prongs had pinned Moony against a wall and was keeping him there with the threat of sharp antlers. Sirius envied James's animagus form. While he was a large shaggy dog, Peter became a rat, Remus was a giant werewolf, but James became an awesome stag. He had a mature gown rack of antlers, and without him, none could keep Remus in check. So as it went, James usually had the task of corralling Moony at his worst. This usually kept James in the hospital wing for a day or so after the event, sometimes from pure exhaustion. And the git still managed to find time for his studies, time to harass Lily, time to practice Quidditch and still hang out with his friends! Sirius was more than a mite jealous of James then.
A light humming was ebbing in the back of his brain. It was like someone was stroking the low octave of a violin. Sirius never listened much to the violin, silly muggle contraption. But he was comforted by the sound now. The more of the jealousy he let rise to the surface, the more beautiful the music became. He closed his eyes and leaned back into it.
As he opened his eyes he knew a new scene would rise to meet him. He wondered vaguely if he was subconsciously bringing up these events. He shook the thought away and gazed at the scene before him. His younger self was manacled to a chair, impervious to any magic he attempted. His wand was broken in front of him, but he still fought. He realized that this made him look guiltier than he was, but he knew that this hearing was wrong. He saw members of the Order file into the room. None would meet his eyes. He remembered the rage he felt at that. He thought that they would know he was innocent. His blood boiled at the thought. One of them could have given him a sign, not leave him in the darkest spot in his life with nothing to hope for. Steadily, the thrumming in his head progressed.
That damnable Amelia Bones was reading off the list of atrocities performed by Peter and Merlin knew whom else. It was long. There was also a petition from the governor's council to have the Dementor's kiss performed right there. Dumbledore stood and calmly dismissed this petition. He came to the front and addressed the panel. He informed them that as bad as the crimes were, there was no a shred of evidence that they were indeed committed by Sirius. The panel murmured amongst themselves and Amelia Bones seemed deep in thought for a long time. She then laid the sentence that sent him to Azkaban. Dumbledore looked at him sadly. He then raised his eyes to where Sirius was now standing. He gave a small nod and returned to his seat. On his right was Mad Eye Moody.
So they knew that he would be here at this time. How? He had never been acknowledged in his former visions. He was certain that Dumbledore could probably see him in the kitchen at Grimmauld Place then. But why was he not saying anything then?
As a Dementor floated in, the thought vanished from his mind. A pair of rotted hands took hold of his former screaming body. As all of his emotions floated out of him, he watched as he slumped and was dragged from the room. He was suddenly overcome with the burning. How could they! And they knew it was wrong! He didn't do it! He let the anger rise. It bubbled up from somewhere in his gut. The violin inside his head started playing a frenzied tune, and he fed its fire with more and more anger.
These were the experiences that made him who he was. This was the life of Sirius Black. This was what shaped him. The scorn, the lies, the pain. He felt all of it course through him, let it enter his heart and felt it get stronger. He was feeding the flame and he knew that was dangerous. Again he closed his eyes, wanting to be away from the source. This violence he was normally able to push aside within him threatened to break its chains and rise. He had to see something else.
He opened them to a room that he never saw before. A vaulted ceiling rose into the air and shelves of books lined the walls. The furniture was lavish and looked expensive. He saw a fireplace and a plush black velvet armchair in front of it. He came around and looked at who was sitting in it. He came face to face with Voldemort. His piercing red eyes gazed at the fire. Voldemort's long fingers came to a steeple under his chin. He was thinking of something. His face broke into a smile. A sneer actually. Sirius hated him. There was more to it than that. He watched as Voldemort rose from his chair. His hair was slicked back, his red eyes burning bright. He spoke to a woman who had just appeared at the door. Sirius was not surprised to see that it was Narcissa.
"Come, we have a journey ahead of us. This is the day that we begin to live as we should." He motioned for Narcissa to come to him. Her belly was large under her robes. Sirius felt the shock wave hit him. He gasped as Voldemort stopped short. Sirius was facing his back.
Voldemort casually turned his head to the side. "Alas, Narcissa, it's too bad that your beloved relative Sirius could not be here to witness our greatest accomplishment. But I'm sure wherever he is, he's watching." Narcissa looked bewildered. She hadn't considered Sirius Black her family for years! But she shook it off and took Voldemort's arm as they approached the door. "I should be more careful what I wish for!" He said before he slammed the door behind him.
Sirius was confounded. Could everyone see him?! What was this? He thought he was an invisible presence, and here, Voldemort had just spoken to him. But Narcissa was oblivious, she had looked right through him. What was the meaning of this? He chewed his lip trying to explain it and he was whisked away to another location.
+++++++
He was in the open air this time. He felt a breeze at his back. He knew where they were. Diagon Alley. He was on the side of the road. People walked past him, not looking at him. In fact, they weren't looking up at anything. Their eyes stayed focused to the ground and they hustled from shop to shop. The sun was shining hot on his shoulders. Students were in the streets, many carried packages with books. Sirius gathered that the new school year was beginning. This was the street that he had seen before. The Leaky Cauldron was still closed. The only shops open were Ollivanders, and Flourish and Botts. He wondered why students were even bothering to go, obviously there was nothing for them after they graduated.
And then there was Harry. He emerged from a side door and walked into the street. Flanked by the most powerful Aurors, he had his head down. Sirius wanted to yell at them. He wondered why they had Harry out in public. As if in answer to his question, Harry raised his head defiantly. And Sirius knew that Harry had demanded it. They were so much alike. Sirius had no time to try to warn them. He looked on as Voldemort walked out of what used to be the Leaky Cauldron. He walked swiftly to Harry and bowed elegantly in front of him. Sirius moved closer to hear what was being said.
Narcissa was not far behind Voldemort. The Aurors were thrown from Harry's side with a flick of Voldemort's wrist. They approached again, to the same effect. Harry whipped out his wand. Students realizing what was happening began to flee. Voldemort snorted at his wand. Another flick of his wrist brought Harry closer to him. He started to speak.
"The prophecy will be realized today. I have awaited this moment for a long time, old friend." Voldemort's voice was low and sinister, the words undulating like a snake's. He kept his gaze on Harry.
"You have no idea what the prophecy says, it was destroyed." Harry defiantly stood his ground, wand raised. Sirius marveled at how he hadn't noticed how Harry had become the image of his father. He was a man now, more than ever. With his feet soundly on the ground, and his head high in the air, Sirius could almost see that proud rack of antlers and defiant countenance that made his father such a formidable opponent when the need arose. Sirius was dismayed at all of the wasted years that he and James should have spent with him. Gone.
"Oh, Harry. All that anger that you have entertained these past months has fed it to me. Every line of it that you anguished over, made it mine. Especially the line 'and either must die at the hand of the other for neither can live while the other survives'. Yes, this one troubles you the most. I know it, I can feel it. Do you have the power to murder me now that I am a human? Is it in you? I doubt it." His face became a smiling monster in front of Harry. "Killing is an adult business, Harry. You have to mean it to do it."
Sirius felt pride flow through him as his godson stood taller, even venturing a step closer.
"Crucio!" Harry himself did not even recognize his voice. It erupted from his throat in an ugly voice deep like a man's. The spell exploded from the end of his wand. Voldemort took a small step back at the force of the spell, but did not fall. Harry also felt the spell in his head, for he said, "What's the matter, can't show us how much it hurts? CRUCIO!" The spell doubled. Voldemort struggled and stood taller. Sirius realized in that moment that Harry wasn't a man, he was still a child. He looked so small as his confidence faltered and the pain in his own head increased. Voldemort must have sensed that the pain he was feeling was rebounded in Harry himself.
"Well Harry, who will break first, you or I?" He raised a hand "CRUCIO!" The spell hit Harry head on, but the boy didn't lose his footing. His face contorted in pain, but he held his wand firm. Voldemort's shoulders began to fall, and he held up his other hand.
"Harry! You're going to kill yourself if you kill him!" Arthur ran forward, wand raised, fear in his eyes. "It's just as Dumbledore said, you are linked!" He aimed at Voldemort, who already had a hand raised, "Stupefy!"
Arthur was thrown to the ground, his fall interrupted with a crucio curse from Narcissa. He screamed as he hit the ground and rolled. His last thought was protecting Harry as he lost consciousness. His body was smoking from the force of the curse, but Sirius knew from his previous vision that he was not dead.
Harry dropped his curse at the same time as Voldemort. Both were out of breath, Harry slightly more. As if he knew that this was the final battle, he threw his wand to the ground. Narcissa had transformed and was perched on the shoulder of Voldemort. Harry's eyes widened as she cawed at him. It was a dirty sound. It made everyone in the general vicinity flinch. She flapped her wings and rose to the sky. She had reached an impressive height and as they all looked on, a brilliant red Dark Mark lingered in the air behind her. What bystanders had lingered long enough now fled screaming.
Voldemort positively towered over Harry now. He raised his hands and Harry rose to his full height. He knew that this was all to end all. He just hoped that he had the power within him to fight. Red beams showered from Voldemort's hands. As they all watched in horror, Harry faltered.
As though he were feeling what Harry was feeling all over again, Sirius caught a glimpse of the final thoughts of the boy. He longed to lie beside his parents and see Sirius again. Sirius tried yelling that he wasn't dead, but that only made Voldemort laugh harder and gave him more power. Harry's body began to crumble. Smoke began to emanate from his pores. Sirius glanced at Voldemort. Blood was pouring from his nose and mouth, He was damn near killing himself. Sirius was amazed at how red the blood was and how much of it there was. And his own blood started to boil. Sirius saw Harry look directly at him as he fell to the ground erupting into flames.
The flames seemed to satisfy Voldemort. He nudged Harry's body with his foot. Nothing. He turned to look at the Aurors. Dumbledore stood among them. Albus gasped as he saw Voldemort's face. Aside from the blood, he looked as though nothing happened. As he turned to look at Sirius, he felt his stomach drop violently. For on his forehead was a peculiar lightning shaped scar.
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