FicWad

We put in a thriller that he recommended I watch. I scooted close to Andy on the couch during a torture scene, they tended to make me feel a little uneasy.

The man on the screen proceeded to skin the woman on the table, even though she was still very much alive and screaming. I put my knees to my chest and my hands to my mouth. I hated this stuff... absolutely hated blood and gore and torture. Why did I agree to watching this movie?

Andy giggled "Drey - it's just a movie."

"Oh my god!!" I ignored his comment and focused on the siringe digging into the poor victim's eye. Out of instinct, I grabbed the fabric of his sweatshirt and twisted it into my fist. "Andy I hate this stuff... sorry. Mitch used to get so mad at me for clinging on to him so just push me off the couch if I get to be too much."

Unfortunately, that was only the opening scene and I had about an hour and a half more of this to go.

"Here..." Andy put his arm around me and pulled me into him. "Does this make you feel better? I won't try to scare you, I promise."

To be honest, it did make me feel better. Much better. I just smiled and buried the side of my head into his shoulder.

About 20 minutes later, Andy's tongue was in my mouth. How did it happen exactly? I have no idea... it just did. I practically on his lap with my hands wrapped around the back of his head.
This wasn't like me... what was I doing? I pulled away.
"Oh my god Andy. Oh my god. No no no." I was flustered and talking way too fast.
He fell back and sighed "I am so sorry. I really shouldn't have."
True, it was Andy who started the make out session, but hey! It takes two to tango.

"Andy no, it's my fault. I have Mitch, I shouldn't have even allowed myself to --"
He cut me off. "Drey, it's okay. It was just a weird tension mistake."
I sighed and smiled. "Sorry Andy - it's just, I havn't kissed anyone in a long time and it felt really, really good and it's not like I have feelings for you, cause I don't. But - ah! That sounded rude..." I was talking fast and I couldn't stop.

Andy smiled "Drey, I don't have feelings for you either. I really like you a lot and you're a cool person and yeahh you're hot. But like I said - weird tension moment."
I licked my lips to reassure myself that Andy and I actually had a 5 minute makeout session.
Andy smiled at me. "So -- did you say it felt really, really good?"
I felt my heart skip a beat as I looked at him. I responded to him by throwing my body back to the position it was and parting his lips with my tongue.

Fuck Audrey, what are you doing?! I ignored my conscious as I layed down on the very large couch.

After several minutes and me wearing nothing but a bra, Andy and I came together and he collapsed with a sigh.

"What did I do?" I said out loud with a giggle as I put my hand to my forehead.
Andy laughed and kissed my collarbone. "Drey... it was innocent fun."
I slapped my forehead again and laughed harder. "Oh my god! I have a sex buddy AND a boyfriend! I'm going to hell!"
"Sex buddy?! I like the sound of that. No attachment..."
I smiled and finished his sentence "Just fun, physical stuff."
Andy laughed "Oh... you're definitely coming to Europe now! I don't have sex with groupies, or really anyone in fact... well, not lately. Anyway - it'll be fun."
I smiled and put on my shirt. "Okay!"
Andy looked shocked by my immediate answer. "Whoa! Okay!! Great!"

Andy's phone rang and he grabbed it off the table. I was putting on my pants when I heard him answer it "Hey Patrick."
I felt a pain in my stomach. Guilt maybe? But about what?! I was confused : there was the boyfriend, the sex buddy, AND Patrick, who really had no reason to be included in the mix, but for some reason, I felt more thinking of him then the other two combined. What did I get myself into?

I sat on the couch thinking, feeling guilty.

"Are you okay?" Andy came back into the room and noticed me staring into space.
I snapped out of it. "Andy - we can't do this. I am not a sex buddy type of person, it's just not me."
He sat down and put his arm around me "Audrey, I understand. I mean, yeah I'm upset because it would have been fun. I probably would have ended up feeling weird about it too. I, myself, am not a casual sex person either."
"Yeah. It's just - I love Mitch." Andy's comforting smile faded.
"Drey, I understand that you're not a sex buddy person and this won't happen again... but don't lie to yourself or me and say it's about Mitch."
I looked at him puzzled "What do you mean?"

He held up his cell phone and shook it in front of me, reminding me who the person was that called him last. "It's not about Mitch..."
I bit my lip. "Am I just reaching for the stars here?"
And laughed and punched my arm. "The /rock/stars. Haaaaa!"
I rolled my eyes. "Seriously Andy..."
He stopped laughing "No, Drey you're not. He's a good guy who deserves a good person."

Another pain shot through my stomach thinking about Mitch and my spur of the moment with Andy. "I'm a horrible person."
"No you're not. You're completely normal. And you dont have to worry about me... I'm cool. There was no attachment with this, and I hope you the best. But Mitch, you need to do something about."
I shook my head. "No. I do love Mitch. Patrick is just a crush, he wouldn't ever go for me. All I need to do is be honest with Mitch and let him know about tonight. He'll understand, I just have to be honest."
Andy zipped up his fly. "Well good luck with that. So what you're saying is that you're just gonna sit back and not do anything about Patrick?"
"There's nothing to do. It's just a little crush, that's all. I'm a big girl, I can handle a little crush."

Andy and I talked for a while that night. He was a great listener, he was a great
friend. What happened didn't even leave an awkward feeling between us. I left his house smiling, thinking about how lucky I was to have someone like Andy who I could talk to and listen to. That guilty feeling interrupted my thoughts once again as my cell phone rang and Mitch's name flashed across the screen.

********

"He broke up with me." I quietly said to Andy the next day as we were driving to Chicago.

"Mitch? He broke up with you?!"

I felt a tear forming in the bottom of my eye.
"Yes. I told him what happened, and I told him everything - even that it didn't mean anythihng - and he screamed and yelled and broke up with me. He called me a groupie slut."

"Aw hunnie, I'm so sorry." He pounded the steering wheel. "God, this is all my
fault! I'm so soo sorry Drey."

I had been thinking about what Patrick said during our night in Chicago about soulmates and relationships.

"Don't worry Andy, really. Maybe it's for the best. Everything happens for a reason, or so I've heard."

He smiled at me "Well you can look at it like that, at least you're being positive. Let's just have fun!"

********

"What's going on guys?!" Joe shouted to Andy and I as we walked into Pete's house. Patrick was sitting at the table and looked up from his laptop and smiled.

"Ahh not much. Mitch broke up with Drey because we had sex yesterday because of this weird sexual tension that took over our bodies."
I stared at Andy in shock and thought seriously Did he actually fucking just say that?

By the shocked look on all three boy's faces, he did. My face turned bright red and I turned to Andy. "Oh my god... Andy!"

"What? I was just answering Joe's question."

I tried to hold back tears. Meaningless sex, a breakup with your soulmate, and now being completely mortified in front three guys that you don't even know that well is a bad mixture for your stress and self-esteem level.

"Uh... excuse me." My voice broke and quivered. Could this get any worse? I pushed passed the boys and made my way to the back of the house and slid the glass door open, stepping outside. I let out a sigh. So much for having fun.

I heard the door open behind me. "Hey Drey."
I turned to Patrick. It obviously could get worse, it just did. "I'm sorry. I don't want to cause a production, its just -- I've had an eventful past few days."

"Don't apologize. Andy should be the one apologizing to you. He was just kidding, but still, it was really out of line for him to dig so deep. Joe and Pete are in there giving him shit about it. He definitely doesn't understand what its like to go through a breakup with such a serious relationship. It's awful, I know that... I've been through it. You don't have to joke around about it, you can cry. It's okay and normal. Just remember that."

I sniffed and pulled Patrick in for a tight hug... it was all I needed at this moment. He rubbed my back and I cried into his shoulder.
Mitch was out of the picture. Andy as a sex buddy was DEFINITELY out of the picture. All I had was Patrick, and I didn't even have him. I just wanted continue hugging him and crying into his shoulder until I felt better, and something in the way his arms were wrapped around me told me that he would let me.
____________________________________________________________________________________

oh snap! drey's a slut. well, not really. i'm really tired.