Categories > Celebrities > Fall Out Boy > Canine Cupid
Joe sees Brenda in a whole new light and Brenda sees herself in a new way, too. Carl finally sees clearly.
5Funny
Reviews
Canine Cupid
(#) luckysgc921 2007-02-09
ok. so i have to re-read this again when I get home (probably shouldn't be reading it right now) but...I think I'm confused. Didn't Carl like Brenda? umm..yea, lol I'll re-read it when I get home but I did like it. I just think I might have missed a major plot point or like a sentence.
BUT..."Jackpot Baby" made me choke on my coffee at my desk. so thanks for that lolAuthor's response
I take the blame for being unclear (and trying to be sneaky). And for your close-to-death experience, I guess.Canine Cupid
(#) GwenMerlon 2007-02-09
AH! I think my eyes actually popped out of my head as I read that. It wasn't really confused by anything, I just didn't believe what was written for a moment so I had to re-read.
But WOW... I sooooooooo did not even see that coming. And now I feel sorry for Carl even more! Ugg, poor girl.
And I think the chapter went along rather smoothly, so you don't need to worry about that. ;) I rated as 'exciting' simply because of the shock value in this last bit but I was very close to 'moving' because there were just so many different emotions from the characters. I loved it as always!Author's response
I'm glad you weren't confused. I didn't wanna ruin the "surprise" by dropping too many hints.
Thank you ever so much. :)Canine Cupid
(#) riaryder 2007-02-09
OK? It's better than ok! It's fabulous, lady. It could have happened in any number of contrived ways. But that would have been bad, because it's not believable.
And that Brenda. Dumping poor Carl in an answering machine message. What a hoe! Joe deserves better. Make him see sense. PLEASE!!
"Jackpot, baby". You retain the comedy crown for the 20th consecutive week with that line there.
Now I have to decide what to give you a point for. Mm, decisions.....Author's response
You always know how to make me feel alright about my crappy writing, dear. :) hugCanine Cupid
(#) luckysgc921 2007-02-09
OOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
sheepish
thats what I get for reading it in the office with like 3 word documents opened to cover the ficwad page up. I miss random words/sentences that suddenly make the story make sense!Author's response
This story makes sense? Must have happened by accident...Canine Cupid
(#) MusicxisxHearts 2007-02-09
I think you did things just fine. The part where Brenda I guess "comes out" was a little rough, but it went over OK anyway. Update soon!Author's response
I wasn't sure how to do that. I wanted to show that she still was a bit too proud to behave like a decent person, I guess. ;)Canine Cupid
(#) whatkatydid 2007-02-10
I loved it!
* /A bunch of half-naked girls bouncing up and down with him - what could be so bad about that?
/ this made me giggle, because by the time i'd peeled off all my layers, I would qualify as one of those half naked girls bouncing.... lol
*/Milkshake/ That's just cute.
*/"Oh, by the way, just so you know, I'm seeing other people," the woman mentioned casually and kissed him on the cheek.
/ AWESOME - the 'I'm OK with it but know you're totally not gonna be OK with it' approach - Me likes....
*/Patrick took off his cap and tossed it aside. His hair stuck to his sweaty forehead and cheeks and he scrunched up his nose, "/ For me that qualifies as foreplay - hahahahahaha
*/"You got a call," Carl said flatly and walked into the kitchen.
/awww - I felt really bad for Carl and not Calr as I spelt it in my last review ( DAMN NOT BEING ABLE TO EDIT ) I think you wrote this just as it should have been in line with the context and environment of the entire story. This is not a banana (drama) boat story, it's punchy and quippy ( haha) and this was just the right tone. I rated exciting because Patrick took his cap off.
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxAuthor's response
Patrick did it all of you, Katy. Just for you. ;)
Thank you for making it all that much better. :) huggageCanine Cupid
(#) Amaranthea 2007-02-11
Oh, poor Carl! To be dumped by Brenda for Joe...and he doesn't even know that he's hurting his friend Carl by dating Brenda...classic love triangle, with a twist.
Of course, your Pete would be thrilled to know two women of his acquiantance who were lovers. ;)Author's response
Hey, you knew it before it even happened. ;) Kinda.
This review is a nice pre-Valentine's Day gift. Thanks! :)Canine Cupid
(#) LOVELA 2007-02-11
Yup, this chapter was fabulous! Why? Two words: Sweaty Patrick.
'Nough Said.
No really. It had the humor and drama that makes your stories spectacular like the fourth of july fire works display. Does that paint a picture? I tried. It's late and I can't see clearly, but this needed to be reviewed.
Hey, I totally miss ya girl! Smooches!Author's response
Ha ha...
Thank you for the praise. You are much nicer than I deserve it. smoochageCanine Cupid
(#) ssketchator 2007-06-15
YES! I was right.
And whatev, crazy. I loved this chapter, I thought it played out beautifully. Patrick's so precious, even whilst sweaty.
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