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"You're those goddamn door guys, aren't you?!?"

Ryan literally wanted to shoot himself in the face.

That was before he realized that he was still gripping Brendon's waist so tightly that his knuckles were turning white.

"We are indeed."

Brendon was practically grinning at the adoration he was receiving from the buxom blonde.
Or was he grinning because of Ryan's unexpected strength?

"And you are?"

"Melody."

"What do you do, Melody?"

"I'm a porn star. Duh. Melody Porter. You have to have seen some of my work."

Ryan swore he felt his jaw drop as his arms dropped from Brendon's waist and hung, shocked, at his sides. Brendon laughed and snaked his arm around Ryan's back.

"We're not really into that kind of thing."

Ryan's eyes widened as he smacked Brendon's hands away.

"We're not really into that kind of thing either."

"You looked pretty into it."

For a dumb girl, Melody was catching on.

"I've got to tell someone about this. I'll call my friend Ashley!"

Melody whipped out her phone and started dialing a number when Ryan jumped over and slammed the phone shut.

"No, you can't do that."

Ryan Ross was all about image. And flaming homosexual for Brendon fucking Urie was the most obvious image people would expect. But he always had to keep them guessing.

"And why not, Ryro?"

"What did you just call me?"

"Isn't it cute? I just made it up myself. Get it? Your first name's Ryan, that's where the "Ry" comes from and your last name's..."

"I get it! Listen, how about we go out? Dinner, whatever, I'll pay."

"Sounds hot. Here's my card. Call me."

Melody handed Ryan a small pink index card that smelled of jasmine. It read: "Melody Porter: freelance adult film star" and had a lipstick kiss at the upper right hand corner.

Ryan could feel the bile rising in his throat.

Melody bounced away, giggling on her cell phone, and Ryan turned around to see Brendon chuckling.

"Oh, how cute. Ryro has a date."

"Fuck you."

"Not now. Maybe later."

Brendon walked by, slapping Ryan playfully. Ryan was sure this story would be all over the dressing room in about 15 seconds...tops.
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"You're gonna fuck a porno whore?"

"I'm not fucking anyone, Spencer!"

"That's not what you said this morning, Ryro."

"Bite me, Brendon."

"Where?"

"Are you just gonna sit there and let them talk to me like this, Jon?"

Jon Walker shrugged his shoulders and shoveled another bite of Captain Crunch into his mouth as the bus continued rolling toward their next stop. He turned back to the T.V., which was currently playing the third season of The O.C., and spoke, mouth still half full.

"I'd fuck a hot porno whore. She is hot, right?"

Ryan glared at him.

"No, she's not. She wears too much makeup, smells like booze and her boobs are the size of Canada."

"Who uses the word booze anymore?"

"Brendon! Not even the point!"

"So, what's the point, Ryro? You wanted to fuck me, but were rudely interrupted by some porno whore you now have to purchase a meal and most likely some cheap sex from?"

"Stop calling me Ryro!"

"I think it's kind of cute."

This time, Spencer was the target of Ryan's death glare.

"I think we're not best friends anymore, Spsm."

Brendon giggled.

"It's like spasm...he he."

"You're a fucking two year old, Urie, you know that?"

"Then, you're a child molester."

Ryan huffed and walked to his bunk, where he shut the curtain and put his iPod on loudly. Brendon and Spencer shrugged and turned to Jon, who only had one question to ask.

"What's wrong with boobs the size of Canada?"
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Little bit of a filler, but it does add to the story...plus, it was humorous...at least I think so...the only way you can tell me what you think is to REVIEW!!! Please and thank you!