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Alexia's eyes fluttered open and her head was pounding. She looked around where she was and sat up. She was laying on a couch somewhere. It was just a small room with a couch and some chairs, a tv, and a mini fridge.

She grabbed her head and groaned.

"Where the hell am I?"

Tiffany jumped awake from a chair across the room at the sound of Alexia's voice.

"You're awake!" She jumped up and ran over to the couch.

"What am I doing...where are we?"

"we're backstage and we're back here cause you passed out in the middle of a fall out boy concert."

"I remember the concert, duh. I just...I don't...I don't remember what happened after they played Golden. Thats as far back as I can remember.."

Tiffany sighed.

"We were in the moshpit and you collapsed. Patrick was yelling at people to help you. I guess he was the first one to see it happen. I freaked out but no one was doing anything to help so i was getting pissed. Pete ran and took you to a body guard. I guess he took you back here. Pete took me to you."

Alexia just sat there, looking down at the floor.

"Why does my shoulder hurt so bad?" She asked with a scrunched up face. She grabed her shoulder and started rubbing it.

Tiffany laughed bitterly

"Someone fucking stepped on you, Ex. Someone stepped on you. That son of a bitch, I swear to god.."

"It's alright Tiff. Don't worry about it. I'll heal. People get hurt at concerts all the time." She didn't know if she was trying to convince Tiffany or herself.

Tiffany just gave her a look that read "You must be fucking high to believe what you just said."

Her features softened though before she started talking again.

"Um...hun. Why did you..yah know...faint?

She sat there for a second, trying to colect her thoughts when the door opened and a couple guys filed in.

Andy was the first one. He had a towel around his neck. Joe was second. He looked over at the two girls and smiled.

"Hey, whats up?"

Tiffany smiled politely. "Hi. I'm Tiffany, and this is Alexia." She said, pointing to her friend next to her.

"Whats up." Andy said next, taking a seat on a chair next to the couch.

Alexia was still stuck in her thoughts when her "hero" so to speak walked in next.

He took off his hat and switched it with another one before walking over to the couch.

"Hey, um...are you alright?" He asked.

Alexia looked up at him and smiled sadly.

"Yah, I..uh...thanks for helpin me. I don't know what would of happened if you didn't say anything."

He just chuckled.

"I couldnt of just let a pretty girl get trampled."

She blushed slightly and smiled, but than remembered that she didn't remember anything.

"Whats wrong?" Pete asked after walking into the room and saw the look on her face.

"I just..I can't fuckin remember anything that happened after you guys played Golden. Thats all I remember. Sorry for the language." She said apologentically.

Pete just laughed lightly.

"Its no big. Understandable. plus, I say fuck all the time."

She smiled at him, than looked at all the rest of the guys.

"Sorry for interupting your guys concert and all." She said, watching her feet.

"Are you kidding? When someones getting hurt, theres no excuse for what happened tonight. Someone should have reacted sooner. I'm so sorry that you got hurt at one of our concerts, or any for that matter." Patrick said, taking her hand in his for comfort.

She sighed. Her eyes widened just than.

"Wait, have you seen my cell phone?"

"Uh-oh. Shit. I think it was left on the floor. When you fell, I think it got knocked out of your pocket... Is that gonna be a big problem Ex?" Tiffany asked. She seemed really upset by this whole thing.

"Why do I need it?.."She asked herself out loud.

Just than it hit her. Everything that her mother said over the phone. Her getting a panic attack during the concert. Pete hovering over her on the floor, everything she remembered.

The tears streemed down her face and she couldnt stop them.

She started bawling on the couch into Patricks shoulder (which happened to be the closest one at the time). He rubbed her (good) shoulder and tried soothing her. "Its ok Alexia, Its ok.."

All the guys were kind of taken aback by her all of a sudden crying like that.

"Why are you crying Ex? Whats wrong?" Tiff asked, seriously scared for her friend. When she didnt answer her, she sighed.

"I think that I should call your dad to come and pick us up. Anybody got a cell I could borrow?" She asked, looking at all the guys pulling out phones when Alexia said something but it was muffled by Patricks shoulder.

"What Lexy?" Tiffany asked, wiping a tear from her cheek.

"I said don't bother." She tried steadying her breathing but nothing was helping.

"Why not?" Tiff asked like that was the stupidest thing she's ever heard. "Hun, you're dads like the only one that can make youf eel better right now. I'm calling him." Alexia protested but Tiff wasnt listening.

"TIFFANY! DON'T FUCKING CALL HIM! Alright?" She screamed in Tiffany's face. Patrick bakced away slightly, but still had a grip on her hand.

Tiffany just scooted away from her on the couch, tears threatening to break free.

"Why the hell not Ex? Why are you acting like this?" She was a little scared of her friend right now. She never yelled.

The boys just stood there, wide eyed, waiting to figure this whole thing out and why she was freaking out like this.

"Because he's not gonna answer Tiffany! Call all you fucking want! He's not gonna pick up!" She lowered her voice, but just barely.

"I don't get what your saying Alexia. Why wouldnt he pick up? He said to call if we needed him. Plus I'm sure the concerts over. We need to get home." She said slowly and camly, afraid that she was gonna have another outburst.

"It's all my fault!" Lexy screamed to no one in particualar and threw her arms in the air. She started crying again, and this time, she couldnt breath.

Alexia started freaking out, trying to get air. Pete ran into this little room and came out with a paper bag.

"I get panic attacks too sometimes." He handed the bag to Alexia.

After her breathing slowed down, she sighed.

"Whats your fault Ex? You didn't do anything!"

"You don't fucking get it Tiff! Dads dead! HE'S FUCKING DEAD! He got hit my a car, heading home from taking me to the concert I HAD TO SEE! I bitched and bitched at mom and dad for months about this concert and how important it was that I go! Becuase aparently "music is my life"! Well, thats what I told them anyway! And being the amazing parents they were, they gave me whatever I wanted! well, what a fuckin coincidnece! Music just happened to be my daddys death too!"

She took a second to get her breath back and she looked around at everyone. She felt bad about saying all that stuff about the concert. Tears spilled out of her eyes again. Patrick pulled her into a hug and rocked her back and forth. Andy and Joe just looked at each other, their eyes looked watery too. Pete justs tood there, stunned by everything she just said.

Tiffany was bawling now too.

"Oh my god! I can't believe this shit! I'm so sorry Lexia! I'm SO SORRY!" She cried as Joe came over and took her into a hug as well.

Alexia pulled away from Patrick and sighed.

"You know. I killed him. He just got back not even a week ago and I fuckin killed him! I never thought that would be the way my daddy died. I thought maybe, MAYBE, god forbid, he'd die while he was over there. But no! It was a stupid fucking chore he had to do for his spoiled daughter.

Pete debated with himself whether or not to ask, but he did anyway.

"where was your dad?" he asked softly.

She looked up at him with puffy red eyes.

"He was in Afghanistan for a year. He just got back last week and it was supposed to be the end of his deployment. He was gonna retire next year. Go figure, i thought it would be road side bombs that would do him in." She sucked in a breath and started sobbing again.

"Oh my god. I'm so sorry Alexia. I'm sure you don't want to hear that right now, but I trully am." Pete came up and touched her arm.

She wiped awaythe tears and tried to calm herself down.

"I need to get home. My mom is definetally not in the right state of mind to be trudgin alone I-5. How are we gonna get home Tiffany? She asked weakly.

"We can take you guys!" Joe offered.

Alexia laughed sarcastically.

"Dude, you guys don't even know where we live. Its about an hour and a half away. And you guys have a tour to get goin on. I don't think you'll have time for a detour." She said, getting more and more depressed by the second.

"No! we'll make time!" Andy said.

Pete nodded in agreement.

Alexia seemed to be getting sleepier and sleepier by the second. SShe guessed thats what happens when you scream for 5 minutes straight. Sht tried to keep her eyes open, but gravity was taking over quickly.

"I'm so sorry Alexia. I know we can't bring your dad back, but is there anything we CAN do?" Patrick asked quietly.

She kind of nervously smiled at him and looked up sleepilly into his eyes.

"Can you sing for me?" He smiled. "Any requests?" She knew exactly what she wanted to hear. "You know Journey, right?"

"Of course." His smile grew, maybe to make her feel better. Maybe to make himself feel better, he wasnt sure. "Could you sing 'Lights' for me? That was kind of like my dad and my song. I just wanna hear it right now." She said sadly, another tear rolling down her cheek. She sucked in another breath quickly, trying not to break down again.

He wiped the tear away with his thumb and she smiled sweetly up at him.

"I don't know if I can do it any justice, but I'll try."

He looked up at the guys and they nodded. They got the hint. They walked over and held Tiffany as they walked into a room connected to their dressing room. They "needed to go over directions and such".

Patrick sat on the couch with Alexia laying on his lap. He brushed her hair away from her face and he started singing quietly and softly. It was the most beautiful thing she had ever heard.

"So you think you're lonely....Well my friend, I'm lonely too. I wanna get back to my city by the bay..."

She wished she could have met all the guys under different circumstances, but obviously it didn't matter what she wanted. She isnt runnin the show anymore. She honeslty didn't know if she ever really was.

Her eyes closed and her breathing steadied for the first time that night. She smiled to herself, but stopped, feeling guilty.


I miss you again daddy.


to some, this is just a really depressing short story. But to me, it's alot more. Honestly, it was kind of like a nightmare I keep having. I just thought maybe, if i wrote it down, it would stop it. I don't expect anyone to review this. I don't really care. I just needed to get that off of my chest. Mission accomplished.

p.s. if i get enough requests for it (doubtful), i'll continue the story. i'm ok with leaving it the way it is. that was the origional plan. but if people want, i can keep it going. your choice. review, if thats what you want.