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South Park: Sorry, Words Don't Make Much Sense

In Which Kyle Gets Angry and Then is Sick

Disclaimer: I own nothing, including the hilarious works of Mat Stone and Trey Parker.

A/N: Hi everyone, this is my first South Park story and I'd appreciate any reviews possible.

Summary: After an unfortunate accident, Kyle's world is flipped upside down, and the only person who can help him has other plans. StanKyle in later chapters.

"CARTMAN!" Kyle Broflovski thundered down the cafeteria hall, shoving fellow freshman out of his way and pushing past upper-classman to stand in front of his customary lunch table at which sat his best friends, Stan and Kenny, and his other kinda-sorta-sometimes-but-definitely-not-now-friend, Cartman. "I'll kill you!" Kyle yelled, lunging towards the taller, bulky boy.

Stan and Kenny shot up and grabbed their smaller, red-headed friend by the shoulders, stopping his jump, mid-leap. "Aw, what's wrong jew-ass? Did something happen?" Cartman asked, leaning his pudgy elbow on the creaky table.

"You stupid fucker!" Kyle yelled, trying to twist out of his friends' tight grips, "I hate you!"

"Dude, seriously, you need to calm down; you're shaking!" Stan muttered, "Whatever he did, it's not worth getting into trouble for."

Kyle choked on his breath, coughing. "He...he- he showed Ike that stupid movie." Kyle, his face pale, made another half-hearted attempt to break free of his friends' grasps. "...the Passion of Christ, while he was babysitting him last week. He's been having nightmares every night since, and yesterday, he comes home and says he wants to renounce his religion!"

"Dude, that's low." Stan said, glaring at Cartman along with Kenny.

"What the problem. The kid's still young. I thought I could save him from a life of sin as a filthy faggy jewboy." Cartman jeered.

"He's nine!" Kyle roared, pulling free of Kenny (who didn't really try that hard to stop him, anyway) and Stan, and diving towards Cartman. Taking one step forward, his leg suddenly trembled and stuttered under him. His other leg shook too, and suddenly instead of attacking Cartman, Kyle was falling on him.

Cartman, seeing Kyle's sudden lack of control, stood up and dove towards him, knocking Kyle backwards and falling on top of the younger boy. Cartman started raining blows down on the Kyle who could only try to cover his face.

"Hey, stop it, you asshole!" Kenny shouted, stepping towards them to try to drag Cartman off Kyle. "Get the hell off him, you fat fuck!"

Stan also jumped into the fight, punching Cartman in his effort to pull the bigger boy off Kyle whose skin was starting to bruise heavily. Finally, a teacher stepped in and yanked Cartman off Kyle and heavily berated all four boys until he noticed that Kyle was leaning heavily on Kenny and that he was black and blue all over. Still glaring, he sent Kyle with Kenny in charge of him, to the nurse's office and sent the other two to the principal's office.

"Dude, you okay?" Kenny asked quietly, once they were out of the cafeteria and on their way to the nurse.

"I...I don't know." Kyle lifted one shaky hand to clutch at his head. "I've been having these horrible headaches lately and I don't know what the hell happened to my legs' back there."

"Maybe you're still sick. You look pale and you're sweating." Kenny said thoughtfully, "You know, you've been getting sick a lot lately."

"I know," Kyle winced and rubbed at his hip. "We've been going to the doctor every time; I've been sick almost constantly for about a year, but he keeps saying that's it's just the diabetes."

"Yeah well, any doctor who works in South Park has got to- Dude what happened to your stomach!" Kenny pointed to Kyle's lower stomach. His shirt had rode up as he had rubbed at his hip bone and now visible were tiny spots of red. "Christ, tell me that that's marker or something!"

"What- Shit! Do you think Cartman did that?" Kyle asked, pulling up his shirt to properly look at the tiny pinpricks of red, his eyes going cross-eyed as he tried to concentrate on both walking steadily and looking at his chest.

"I have no idea. He was only on you for one or two minutes." Kenny said worriedly.

"Yeah, but fatass weighs like 250 pounds." Kyle said laughing as he tried to pull a little bit of his weight back from Kenny.

Kenny laughed half-heartedly. The truth was, just as Kyle had gone on to be first in his class in academics; and Kenny had gone on to successfully skip as many classes possible while still not being kicked out of school; and Stan had gone on to be a first-stringer football quarterback as a freshman, Cartman had gone on to become a linebacker and during all those long football practices, he had slimmed down quite a bit. There was just too much damage to be caused in that short a fight.

"I'm fine." Kyle insisted, seeing Kenny's worried look, only partly hidden by his trademark orange hoodie.

"Whatever, let's just get you to the nurse." Kenny murmured, opening the door to her office.

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Two hours later, Kyle and Stan were waiting outside in the snow, bundled up tightly, coats, gloves, and all. "Sorry I got you in trouble." Kyle said softly, his breath ghosting in the bitter air.

Stan shrugged. "It's cool, Dude." All four boys had been suspended for four days, starting immediately and they were now waiting for their parents to pick them up. Kenny had decided to take a bus home, ignoring Stan and Kyle offers for a ride and Cartman was standing off to the side, looking undeniably smug. "Hey Kyle, Kenny said you weren't looking too good." Stan said, "What's wrong?"

Kyle, glaring at Cartman, looked back over at Stan. "Who the hell knows? The nurse said that everything looked fine. I even feel a little better. I'm probably just getting sick again."

Stan rolled his eyes. "Dude, you need to go to a real doctor. We go to school in Denver, for fuck's sake. Just go after school or something."

"It's not a big-" A car honked and both boys looked up. "Oh, it's my dad." Kyle said as the car honked again." Shit. He looks upset. He had to come all the way from the office. I better go." As he ran towards the car, Kyle yelled over his shoulder, "Don't worry about it Dude, everything's fine."

As Kyle silently opened the car door and sat in the passenger seat, he chanced a look at his father. Gerald Broflovski was shaking his head wryly at his son. "Kyle, you know better than to get into fights." he said, pulling out of the school parking lot.

Kyle fiddled with his seat belt. "It was with Cartman." he said as way of an explanation.

"I know son. The school told me. You're just lucky your mother's in Connecticut visiting her sister. She'd be so upset." Gerald glanced at his bruised son. "As it is, I think we'll just keep this incident between us."

Kyle looked up relieved. "Thanks Dad." he said gratefully.

"I just don't understand why you don't make friends with other boys? The school's huge." Gerald chided.

"No way. Stan and Kenny have been my friends since pre-school." Kyle answered, wincing as his bruised arm hit the seat. "Besides everyone at this school hates the South Park kids."

"Then play with other children from South Park." Gerald slowed to a stop at the sign and then began to ease his way across the street. "If you keep- Kyle!"

Kyle body stiffened suddenly and then he began shaking uncontrollably in his seat, his jerks straining against his seatbelt. "KYLE!" Gerald yelled again as Kyle's twitching started to subside, "What's happening?"

Neither of them noticed the car speeding towards them.

To Be Continued...