Categories > Celebrities > Panic! At The Disco > Down the road, not across the street

Just who would I have been? To be the one attached at all times to your hip.

by grandtheftautumn 7 reviews

There are two tragedies in life. One is to lose your heart's desire. The other is to gain it. ~ George Bernard Shaw YOU LOVE ME! HA. But seriously all my readers please let me know if you're lo...

Category: Panic! At The Disco - Rating: R - Genres: Drama, Romance - Warnings: [V] - Published: 2007-04-23 - Updated: 2007-04-24 - 1644 words

1Moving
Ha Lifey caught me out. Yes you all should consider yourselves lucky that I can't resist updating for loyal readers/reviewers.

I thought I'd put in a song again for this chapter. Anyone heard of "Feeling A Moment" by Feeder? If you don't have it already load up the song now from myspace, purevolume, or at best youtube -- http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MjgQLEZ6vjY

This is a beautiful song & if u havnt heard it before the start is really quiet so dont think u forgot to press play when u probably did kz =]

PLAY IT ONLY WHEN I GIVE YOU THE SIGNAL =]

Much love
GTA

xo




Shaw once wrote, 'There are two tragedies in life. One is to lose your heart's desire. The other is to gain it.'





Chapter 14: Just who would I have been? To be the one attached at all times to your hip.



I can't believe he lied to me again. Didn't he fucking learn the first time? I never want to see his stupid face ever again.

I hailed a taxi down, quite aggressively I might add, and hauled ass to the airport. All I knew was that I wanted to get as far away from Chicago and Pete Wentz as possible. When I arrived I was ready catch the next flight home. But what would I go home to? Ryan wasn't there, none of the boys were. I didn't even have uni because I deferred. I was granted the year off I might as well make the most of it. I then booked the earliest flight to London.

My attempts to sleep on the plane were futile. I was trying to fathom how he could lie to me, again/, and after his mini soapbox speech about how he loves me so much. /I knew it was too good to be true. I should have known better. It's PETE WENTZ! The guy has eyes for anything that moves. I eventually dozed off, but even in my dreams I couldn't escape the image of him with that slut. Very frequently during the flight, thoughts of Ryan popped into my head. I knew that I was still in love with him. Deep down I knew he was the main reason why I didn't want to fall for Pete, other than giving my heart to a complete ass that proved he can't be trusted. I can't hold this in any longer.



It was almost 1 am when my plane landed. I headed to the Sanderson Hotel, where Brendon said they would be staying. Zach met me in the lobby and then accompanied me to the floor they were staying.


[A/N: Play "Feeling a Moment" - Feeder. At least until first 1.35, or whole if u like]


I knocked on his suite door. This was a mistake, I shouldn't be here. Panicked, I turned to leave, but Ryan had opened the door by then.

"Amara?" he said. I froze, hesitating to face him.

"Amara, what's wrong?" He could see the trademark signs that she had been crying. He put an arm around her and led her inside the room. She walked out of his half-embrace, still with her back to him, she said softly. "The past two weeks I've come to realise something. Well I've known it for a long time now. There's something I never told you, and I need to get it off my chest before I explode."

He chuckled, "AJ, you're babbling. Just spit it out already. You know you can tell me anything." She finally turned to face him. With a deep breath, it finally came out.

"Ryan... I love you. I've been in love with you since we were kids."

Ryan scanned her face, debating whether this was a cruel joke or in fact his dreams coming to life. He closed in on the space between them, "Amara I..."

I love you too. Just tell her already. Ryan stuttered on his words, not quite sure if it was from shock or the fact that he...

The bathroom door opened, interrupting their beautiful moment and a tall, model-like figure walked out. "Oh hey, I thought I heard voices. Ryro, is this Amara? You said she wouldn't be coming for another two weeks." She kissed him on the cheek before turning to face me. "I've heard a lot about you," she smiled. "Sorry how rude of me to babble on like this, I'm Chastity. Ryan's girlfriend."

Their beautiful reality had transformed instantly into a nightmare for Ryan and Amara.

Chastity kissed Amara on the cheek as if they were old high school buddies. Amara just stood there stunned from the news. She was restraining herself from throwing up and fainting at the same time. Amara realised she hadn't said anything yet. "Yeah I'm Amara. I had no idea he had a girlfriend. It's nice to meet you." she smiled weakly.

It was as if the last five minutes were a momentary case of insanity and someone had come along to slap her in the face and ever so kindly bring her back to reality.

You've got to be kidding me. I can't believe this is happening. Oh wait, I can cause I'm cursed! She thought miserably.


[AN: If timed correctly 1.35 should be about now]


"Gosh its way late, I still have to visit Lacey. See ya later guys." She pathetically excused herself from their presence. She rushed out subtly from the hotel room and headed to the elevator.

Ryan mumbled something that sounded like see you later. He contemplated chasing after her but like every other time he lacked the balls to act. She pushed frantically at the elevator button. When the doors finally opened she ran inside, right into Brendon's arms. She caught him off guard that he almost lost his balance. The elevator doors slowly began to close but Brendon quickly held them open and guided her to his own room.

Feeling like she had no more tears to cry, Amara collapsed onto Brendon's bed like a stunned mullet. God, I have the greatest timing in the world.

"A.J honey, how come you're here early? Aren't you meant to be back in Chicago?"

"Pete. Lied again. Cheated. Skanky hoe bag." I choked out.

"No way, Amara. I know Pete is a lot of things but I know he cares a lot about you."

"I'd show you the pictures but I left them back in Chicago. Forget it Brendon, I started to believe he really did love me but it's over. To top it off I've just screwed up with Ryan."

"Did you two fight or something? Is that why you were running-slash-crying into the elevator?"

"No, we didn't fight. I told him... I told him..."

"That you love him?" He finished my sentence. I was taken aback, looking at him with eyes wide open.

"Come on, it's pretty obvious to everyone... well, except Ryan. So did he say it back?"

"Well, he didn't say anything back actually. But I know the next words out of his mouth wouldn't have been 'Amara, I love you too' considering the fact his girlfriend walked in on us. He was about to say 'Amara, I'm sorry I have a girlfriend.'"

"She's still there? Oh, so you met Chastity." He trailed off. The look on my face must have screamed, Am I the only one who didn't know? because he hastily defended himself. "Hey, we only found out today after you left the airport. No one thought much of it beforehand. We didn't think it was anything serious cause Ry didn't say much and then she shows up at the airport going on about how she's coming on tour and they're dating and crap."

"Ry never mentioned her. How'd they... wait I don't want to know."

Brendon continued on thinking it was for my benefit. "Her name's Chastity Mi'kates. She's the daughter of one of the tour managers. She would come into the studio when Ryan met with her dad for the tour, and yeah... guess she sunk her claws into him."

"Hypnotised him more like it," I muttered bitterly.

"Well I don't really know her well enough to judge. She seems nice but I dunno... there's something a little off about her. I just got this small vibe. Can't put my finger on it yet. Don't worry too much about them, it's just new. I doubt he's even really serious about her."

"What do I do? I can't stay here with her around. It'll just be too awkward. I am not going back to Pete. I should have just gone straight home from Chicago. Is it okay to crash here tonight? I'll promise I'll be out of here in the morning."

Brendon sat down next to me and pulled me into a hug. "Amara, don't be silly. Stop talking like you're a burden, cause you're not. I think it's better if you don't leave. I know it might seem hard but you should still come on the tour with us. It'll be okay I promise. If it gets weird we can go out and do something together. Or if things get really hard then I'll let you go home if you want to. I just don't want to see you give up so easily."

"I don't know Bren. Last time someone asked me to come on tour, I ended up here and alone."

"Don't be a drama queen. You're not alone. I'm here for you. You're one of my best friends."

"Brendon Boyd Urie, you always know the right thing to say." I smiled for what felt like the first time that night.

Later that night, well early morning, I lay awake wondering how I was going to face Ryan and Chastity in the morning and everyday on the tour.




*

A/N:

Clearly Shaw had his broken once or twice ~ Brooke Davis.
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