Categories > Celebrities > Paris Hilton

My So Called Cabbage

by GreenDayNinja 6 reviews

Paris had an awful dream...

Category: Paris Hilton - Rating: PG - Genres: Drama, Humor - Warnings: [V] - Published: 2007-05-21 - Updated: 2007-05-22 - 504 words - Complete

"Like Omg!" screamed Paris as she woke up and fanned herself with her hands. "Mini-Paris! Like come!" she yelled as soon as she spotted her and pulled her up onto her bed by her leg. The poor dog whined and just sat there. "Mini-Paris, I like had the worst dream ever like pos--sib--le." she said, but had to sound out the big words.

"It all started when I like went to sleep, Mini-Paris." Mini-Paris whined as she started. "I was like at the grocery store! I mean who like goes to the grocery store. Everyone like has ser--va--nts for that like right Mini-Paris!? Right!" At this time Mini-Paris was struggling to escape the death wrenching clutches of her owner. "And I was like buying some cabbage. I mean like who doesn't like cabbage? Well like anyway...AHHHHHH!" she screamed as Mini-Paris latched onto her hair. "LIKE DON'T TOUCH THE HAIR!" she screamed again patting down her hair. "Your like so totally dead d--o--g!" she exclaimed as she threw her do out the window. "Servant Steve bring me a bowl of steamed cabbage and another Mini-Paris!" she once again screamed with a winy voice.

Her Servant came up to her room with a large plate of steamed cabbage and another Mini-Paris. "Your name like is Mi--ni-Pa--ris., okay?" she said as she took the cabbage and grasped Mini-Paris. Mini-Paris was gasping for air as she started again. "Then I was like a little African boy named Shaqwalee. I was like totally starving for food. But all was good when like fi--nal--ly I was like back to normal and this cute guy walked and caressed me." Paris said smiling, Mini-Paris still there gasping for air. Accidentally, she placed her paw to close to Paris' hair. "AAHHHHHH! LIKE OH NO YOU DIDN'T!" Paris screamed in a z-formation, a very slow z-formation, yet she was too stupid to snap;so she clapped. She threw Mini-Paris against the wall as she whined. "NOOOO! YOU DON'T LIKE TOUCH MY HAIR!" she grabbed her cabbage and stuffed it in her mouth, while throwing it at her cringing dog.

She stared an evil snobby look for a while but then went on with her story. "And one time I like hhad this one dream that I was out of cabbage.!" she stuffed more cabbage into her mouth. "I had to eat 3 calorie yogurt! Two times a day Mini-Paris. Two times!" she said touching her stomach. "Why must I like be so fat!?" she screamed looking up and backing into the wall falling down in the corner.

"Wait. I can always like kill myself...okay thats what I'll do."

Paris walked over to the window and threw herself out.Later that day she realized it was a only a two foot drop to the ground.

So today we learned a lesson. Pairs Hilton is retarded. I know you were hoping she would die...but I'm sorry, its just how the story ends...

The End
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