FicWad

I wasn't sure what was going to happen; and I wasn't quite sure if I was ready to. I mean, all in all Patrick was a really none physical type of guy, at least in every aspect that didn't involve Pete. I wasn't sure if this all was just going to be another fight where one of them ends up breaking the others arm and then calls it quits; or if it was going to turn into something worse, to a point where neither of them had gotten before. So I tired my best to get Patrick to stay. I said everything I could think of, but it seemed the things I should have really been saying were stuck in the back of my throat, refusing to come out. Maybe part of me knew that he needed to go and teach Pete a lesson.

So Patrick eventually left; of course, I wasn't all for it. It was like my conscious was screaming in my head, telling me that this whole idea would be nothing but trouble. But there was no stopping him, not at this point, not when Pete had gone this far. Maybe I could have stopped him tonight, but Pat would have eventually found a way. So I did what I was told and went to sleep, hoping for the morning.

----

I opened my eyes slowly, the sunlight pouring through the sheer curtains seemed to blind me. I looked around slowly, tiredly, as I remembered where I was. Glancing down at the clock I realized that it was nearly two in the afternoon. I sat upright and forward, dangling my feet off the edge of the bed forcing myself to wake up. A few moments later I set my feet firmly onto the ground and stood up, making my way to Patrick's room. I hadn't forgotten about what had happened last night.

I tiptoed down the hallway trying to avoid making squeaks in the floor. As I turned the corner I saw the large double doors that stood strongly at the end of the corridor. My sep quickened, anxious to get and find out what all had happened while I was sleeping. I stormed through the doors, making it seemingly impossible to sleep through, although Patrick had managed to. I scratched my head confused as I approached him quieter, sitting myself down next to him on his bed. He slept so soundly, making it impossible to think anything was wrong.

I placed my hand down softly onto his forehead and pushed his hair back caringly. His eyes fluttered slowly as I did so, signaling his waking. I took my hand off quickly, almost alarmed, as he opened his eyes completely, releasing a goofy, tired smile. At that moment he looked like a life-sized teddy bear, which made it difficult to want to ask him about the night before. I closed my eyes, focusing myself, and swallowed the large lump that stuck in the back of my throat. "Patrick..." I said softly, my voice trailing off into nothing, as I spoke the word further. "What happened last night?"

"Nothing." He said bluntly, his voice showing that of preoccupation; like he didn't want to explain the whole thing to me. It made my worry. "The fucking pre-Madonna got what he had coming to him; that's all you should want to hear." He pushed the covers aside and sat up forward, as if he were getting ready to leave.

I put my hand on his arm, stopping him, and causing his face to look over at me. His eyes showed emptiness, or just sorrow. Like it killed him inside knowing that him and Pete were no longer true friends; that he did what he did to the boy. It made me worry even more. "Pat...I need to know...." I took a pause.
Please..." my voice, again, trailed off.

Patrick didn't answer right away; like he was thinking, or just in shock. "Don't," he said quickly as he stood up, placing his hands across his face. "You aren't in love with that fuck-up. Not after what he did; not after what he cost you."

The tears began rolling down my cheeks as I bit down hard on my lip to stop me from fully crying. "I can't help it Pat..." I cried softly to myself as I lay down slowly on the bed. He got back onto the bed and lay down right beside me, staring intensely into my eyes. "I don't want to; and I know I shouldn't. but I just cant fucking help but care about that boy...I cant help but love him."

"Well I'm sorry, kid. But you can't", his voice was overpowering and serious. "I want the best for you, and Pete, well he's pretty much the worst; the lowest you can get." He took a pause. "You should be marrying a doctor or a lawyer or a..."

"Don't fucking pull this father shit on me." I covered my face with my hands and wiped away the tears. "You always think you're my damn father and your not. You just can't fucking get over that he left us!" my voice grew louder with every word, leaving the last nearly a scream.

Patrick took my hand and squeezed it tightly as I took a long comforting breath. He stared intensely into my eyes. "I would never fucking try and be a father like that to you. I'm trying to be your damn brother and watch out for you. To make sure you don't turn out like your fucking mother."

At that moment I could have just shot that boy in the face. How fucking dare he talk about my damn mother like that when it was his dad who left us all? It was his father who was the dog and left his entire family for some out of work hooker. "My mother was a goddamn angel compared to your fucking ass hole father. Maybe she wasn't the best mother, but at least she was there. She did what she had to do for me and for you!" I took a pause and let my voice lower. "She didn't even want anything to do with your fucking sorry ass."

"Well maybe I didn't want anything to do with her, or you at the time. But that's not the fucking point right now, Dana. The point is your deserve better then him."

"You can't fucking tell me who I can or cant love, Pat", I took a pause. "You're gonna have to learn sooner or later..."










soo yes'm
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-lauren