Categories > Celebrities > Panic! At The Disco > The Art Of Loathing Brendon Urie

Chapter One: Rabid Fans *Shudder*

by peterpandacomplex 0 reviews

I found this story on buzznet while messing around on the internet late one night. I don't know who writes it though.

Category: Panic! At The Disco - Rating: G - Genres: Horror - Published: 2007-06-01 - Updated: 2007-06-02 - 2863 words

The Art Of Loathing Brendon Urie: Chapter One: Rabid Fans Shudder

"Rain drops on roses and girls in white dresses it's sleeping with roaches and taking best guesses. Shades of the sheets and before all the stains and a few more of your least favorite things." Brendon Urie sang over the microphone to the 7,500-person audience. "Thank you and good night!" He said, finishing up the last song of the concert. Wiping off sweat from his forehead the 19-year-old waited for his friends and fellow band-mates, Jon Walker, Ryan Ross, and Spencer Smith to finish the music. This is what he loved. Singing in the band, playing the music he loved to play, with his best friends. Still, even more than a year after being signed by Fueled By Ramen, he couldn't comprehend that this had happened to him. That people would love Panic! At The Disco enough that they won the Video of the Year award at the VMA's. The fact that he had been to the VMA's was a feat in itself he didn't think possible. But it had happened. Despite the quirky, dorky, weird teenager he had been a matter of months ago Brendon became 'so hot' in the minds of thousands of teenage girls.

The Chicagoan audience had been forced to start filing out of the UIC Pavilion, and the four members of Panic! went back stage to prepare for meeting the 20 selected ticket holders. "Good turnout." Ryan Ross, the band's lyricist and lead guitarist, said while jumping on Brendon's back. They collapsed to the floor.

"You know I'd really like it if you were to stop trying to make me paralyzed before age 20." Brendon said shoving Ryan off his back.

"At least you wouldn't be dead." Spencer Smith, the bands drummer, pointed out.

"Yeah, we couldn't have you dead." Jon Walker, the bands bassist stated in a worried manner. "No one would come to our concerts then, without our main eye-candy on stage."

"That's what I'm worried about." Brendon said.

"Get over yourself man, we're all the eye-candy."

"I'd wish you'd stop saying 'eye-candy'." Ryan spoke up. "It's just a bit creepy." He shuddered. The rest of the band just looked at him. "Come on, can't you just picture people eating eyeballs like popcorn? Throwing it up in the air and catching it in their mouths! It's creepy!!!" Spencer guffawed, Jon raised an eyebrow and Brendon punched Ryan in the arm. "Spencer get up and stop guffawing!"

"Spencer's guffawing again? Gosh Spence, that's twice in one day," Brendon referred to earlier on, before the show, when they were all playing with bratz dolls and Spencer became overcome with laughter at Brendon's girl voice for them.

"In all reality, though," Jon chimed in, "There actually is a type of candy called eye-candy. It's just like gumballs that are shaped like and look like eyeballs. They taste pretty good."

"Oh no." Ryan said, picturing Jon eating eyeballs, "My worst fear is coming true! Whatever you do, don't gouge my eyes out in the middle of the night and eat them."

Jon looked at Ryan seriously. "I never would do that. No one would ever come to our concerts again if our guitarist had no eyes in his eye sockets."

"We better get ready to meet the fans... let's hope we don't get mauled again." Spencer changed the subject in fear. "I mean, sure it's only twenty... god... twenty fans that are like a pack of wolves.

"You are so weird." Brendon said. "Comparing our fans to a pack of wolves!"

"At least I don't laugh like a hyena."

"I don't know what you are talking about." Panic! At The Disco made their way to a room where twenty of the 7,500 audience members were waiting to meet them. They could smell the overwhelming stench of way too much perfume down the hall. The high-pitched screaming signaled their entrance to the room. The fans were rabid animals foaming at the mouth. This is going to be a fun hour... Brendon thought sarcastically as he, Spencer, Jon and Ryan were ushered to the front, behind the security guards and a table. None of the band members had ever seen the fans so... uncompromising and ardent, before. It was quite scary: a pack of cannibalistic werewolves snarling and clawing at each other trying to get the band. Ryan, Jon, Spencer and Brendon sat down and waited for the malicious and malevolent fans to form a line so they could sign lots of autographs and talk with them. Autograph after autograph went by and the members of Panic! At the Disco were even more scared than before. Girls were hurling themselves at the members with such force that Brendon and Ryan repeatedly fell out of their chairs, behaving even more besotted up close. I will be lucky if I survive this without a broken bone in my body. Thought Brendon as he looked over to his fellow band mates to exchange glances. This is the exact moment he saw Kiersten Tiffany Morrison for the first time. She was beautiful. Dazzling were those aqua eyes, and chin length sandy-blond hair framing her oval face perfectly. She was sporting one of the many Panic! At The Disco shirts sold from the vendors complimented by dark blue jeans and converse shoes. She was petite and had dimples on each side of her smile. The most surprising of her attributes was that she wasn't acting rabid. Brendon couldn't see the slightest trace of foam coming out of her mouth, and he was glad, because she was perfect for Spencer. Brendon knew it immediately; especially in the way his fellow band mate was staring at her, in the way she was staring at Spencer.

"Hi." She said shyly, looking into Spencer's eyes, while tucking a piece of hair behind her ear.

"Hey," Spencer returned.

"How about you sit down, and stay, rather than leaving." Jon purposed to the girl, sensing the powerful moment Spencer was having with her. She nodded quickly and sat down in an empty chair next to Spencer.

"What? Why..." stupidly began Ryan-The-Oblivious, who was abruptly elbowed in the chest by Brendon and unfortunately thrown off his chair once more. Luckily the line of zealous fans was dwindling down, and hence Spencer could actually spend time alone with this girl.

The last vile and ghastly animal was ushered out when Spencer's eyes finally broke away from the girls, and looked to the rest of the band. "Would you guys mind if you left us alone?" Before he even finished his sentence, he looked back to the girl. "I'm Spencer." Spencer said like a complete idiot. Of course she knew who he was, she was after all at his concert. Realizing this a second too late Spencer blushed.

She blushed right along with him as the other members of Panic! At The Disco quietly snuck out, all the while giggling silently like dorks, "I'm Kiersten." She said

"It's a pleasure to meet you Kiersten." Spencer whispered quietly to her nervous giggle. That was the last audible thing that Ryan, Jon or Brendon could hear, even while their ears were pressed up against the wall and completely silent. Every few minutes one of them would peek inside and always see one of their lips moving. There was an air of intimacy around them. If the band members were to whisper something to each other they'd feel like they were horrifically loud. After trying relentlessly, they finally gave up and went to yet another room to distract them while waiting for Spencer to be done talking with Kiersten. They would want to know everything that had happened.

It had been a long time since Spencer had gone out with anyone or even shown an interest in anyone. In-fact, his friends could remember her perfectly. Known in public as Belinda or Bee for short, she was a witch with a capital 'B'. Spencer had fallen madly in love with her, and she used him. She used him to get to his other good friend at the time. He-who-they-will-never-mention. Brendon and Ryan especially had tried to get him to break it off with her before his heart got broken, but he wouldn't, Spencer loved Belinda too much. Needless to say, it ended badly. They were all ecstatic now that, more than a year later, he seemed to finally have a love interest again.

Three hours after the concert had ended, it was midnight and Spencer and Kiersten were still talking seamlessly, with no ending point in sight. The other three band members were sprawled over the room. Jon and Ryan were playing videogames on a TV nearby, both loosing appallingly to the point it was offensive, on account of their eyes being closed. The two friends loved to experiment different ways of playing videogames. Brendon was being his usual impatient self, and finally had enough of waiting. To prevent him from bursting into the room were Kiersten and Spencer were talking, he decided to take a walk out through the building.

Humming to himself the Britney Spears cover "Hit Me Baby One More Time." Brendon persistently walked around mindlessly, thinking. He wondered if Spencer would ask Kiersten on tour with them. Their entire band had talked about this once before. If he were to ever like a girl enough again, they'd want him to be happy. If she wouldn't come on tour then Spencer might not see her again for a really long time. So thus, they came to the conclusion that Spencer could invite any girl he liked on tour with the group. Kiersten seemed to be that girl that would be invited. Just the little amount of time he'd seen them together, Brendon knew it was true. His thoughts were interrupted by muffled shouting down the hall from where he was. Being curious, Brendon went to investigate the noise. Walking around the corner, he identified the source of the noise. A fan was trying to get past a security guard.

"Miss! I must ask you to calm down. I don't want to throw you out!" The security guard yelled.

"I have to get back there!" The girl screamed maniacally.

"Oh my god, she's rabid... foaming from the mouth..." Brendon spoke aloud without thinking first, fearing that his worst fears had come true. Ever since a concert in New York, he had nightmares about fans foaming from the mouth trying to molest him. He shuddered thinking about it. Now this!

This girl was worse than the worst fan three hours ago. Not only did she seem to be foaming from the mouth, but also it looked like a bomb had gone off on her head. Her shoulder length, pitch-black hair was in knots flying all over the place: similar to a fro from the 70's. That wasn't the worst part of her appearance. Brendon could have sworn her entire body was radioactive and glowing, but that was nothing compared to the radioactivity in her eyes. He thought that on a normal day her eyes might have been green, but they looked like salt had been poured into them. They were bright red and on fire, and looked to be searing in pain. Her clothes were torn in places and she was covered in dirt. She looked horrid. Practically disfigured and she was speaking crazily, looking around wildly. As Brendon spoke aloud, the girl's eyes locked on him and narrowed into slits. She had heard him and as a result given him the scariest sight he would ever see. Brendon was going to have nightmares for months about this crazy fan.

Turning back to the security guard she yelled again her voice furious and filled with horror. "I swear to you! I don't care about the band, my friend is back there! She is my ride home. I have been waiting for three freaking hours for her! I tried to freaking walk home and look what happened to me! Let me back there this instant or..." The girl stopped in mid-sentence, her eyes locking on something near Brendon. Her voice went down several octaves and became so demonic that it sent chills down even her spine. "Kiersten Tiffany Morrison."

Brendon heard a small yelp from behind him. Turning he saw Kiersten holding hands with Spencer, both looking as terrified as he felt. Ryan and Jon stood behind them. Jon's eyes were wide and Ryan looked like he could burst into tears; so did Kiersten. Even the security guard backed away from her as the devil girl sauntered at a snail's pace up to Kiersten seeming to prolonging her sure to be dreadful death. The devil girl looked Kiersten directly in the eyes as Kiersten said. "H-Hi Lexie..."

"Hello Kiersten." Lexie said emotionless.

"I can explain!" Kiersten exclaimed hopefully. "You see, I met Spencer and we were talking and I just lost track of time and..."

"I don't want your explanations Kiersten. I want to go home." Lexie turned and started to walk away from everyone else.

"Wait, Lexie!" Lexie stopped dead in her tracks and turned around on spot. It was something from a horror flick.

"Yes?" Lexie raised her eyebrows, crossed her pale arms together and pursed her rose lips.

"Um, well, Spencer asked me to come on their fall tour, and I said yes." Lexie's eyes became slits once more and she stalked off to the next room without saying anything. Throughout the entire UIC Pavilion, a high pitched scream was heard, sound waves erupting from Lexie's mouth, tearing through walls and eardrums, making Jon, Ryan, Brendon and Spencer cover their ears.

Color drained from Kiersten's face when a sickeningly sweet sound came from the room next door. "Oh Kiersten, I would like to speak with you for a moment." On a death march to hell Kiersten walked to Lexie. "What. Were. You. Thinking. ???" Lexie said loud enough that Panic! could hear. "The Fall Tour? You don't even know them, Kiersten! Sure, they are in a band, but why should you trust them? They haven't done anything to deserve your trust. Your mother will never let you go. On top of all that: I can't even believe you would consider it Kiersten! We are going on a cross-country trip! Just the two of us remember? A graduation present! Two best friends spending one last year with each other before we go off to college and live the rest of our lives! I've known you since the Third grade Kiersten Tiffany Morrison. And Never. Ever. Have I seen you be so irresponsible as you are right now! What kind of spell has he put you on? One that you would leave me stranded out there for three hours, worried sick that some creepy old guy had kidnapped you while all this time you were creating a way to betray your best friend! I... I am so disappointed in you Kiersten. What kind of friend are you?" She seems to be a human after all... Brendon thought amazed at this epiphany.

Somehow Kiersten found strength to fight death back. "What kind of friend am I? Am I: Alexis Mallory-Renee Graham! I have found a boy that I like. I like a lot. You obviously don't believe in love at first sight, but I do Lexie! I do and I have found it! You may be my best friend, but we can always tour the country sometime else together. I want to be with him. And... Lexie I had a solution! I wanted you to come with us! I explained to Spencer about our trip, and that I wanted to spend time with you, and we decided that you can come along. I know my mom would never let me go, even if she had a choice. I am 18 now, as are you! If you went with I'd have her blessing! But no! You just jump to the conclusion that I am a horrible friend and that I'd betray you like this. You think you're disappointed in me, Alexis Mallory-Renee Graham? Well guess what. I'm disappointed in you. In you."

"I'm sorry Kiersten! I am. But do you honestly think I'd want to come on tour with Panic! At The Disco? What makes you think I'd have any desire to do that? I only came to this concert for your birthday! For you!"

"That's why you'd come, Lexie! To be with me. To let me be happy being with Spencer and get to spend time with you at the same time. I guess I was too foolish to think you'd want me to be happy. I'm only going if you go with me Lexie. I love you too much." There was a dead pause and Spencer realized he had been holding his breath.

"Fine." Even the word flabbergasted would not describe how everyone felt to hear Lexie admit defeat. It would, however, describe how shocked everyone was to hear such a soft tone in Lexie's voice. "Fine, I'll go. But it's only for you Kiersten. I'm going against my own wishes because I love you." This is going to be a fun tour.
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