FicWad

FRANK'S POV
Its early, about three am, and I'm on my way to work, I couldn't wake gee up this morning, he wont be happy, but I just don't have the heart to disturb him. He looks like an angel when he's asleep, so peaceful so happy, not depressed and suicidal, its his fathers fault he's like this, I fucking hate his father, if I ever get my hands on him I will break his pretty boy model face up! Maybe then, he will understand what I its like to be an outcast, so be picked on for being yourself, gee and I get that all the time, but we have our ways of dealing with it. Just thinking of him makes me want to puke.

I work at a big welding company in jersey, I have to wear big steel cap boots and a uniform and shit, gee loves it, he loves a man in uniform, as you can guess it gets pretty cold at three am, so I had my uniform shirt then my black flag hoodie and a parka on, what can I say I hate the cold.

I can't believe gee and I own our own place now, it's so cool, and mikey has his own apartment, well he does share it with ray and bob, but that's not the point. I guess things are getting pretty serious between him and bob, ray called last night when gee had fallen asleep, he said that he walked in on mikey and bob dry fucking, I thought it was pretty funny, but he didn't. They're pretty much are soul mates; they spend every second of their lives together. We are all so happy for them, mikey had recently had a seriously bad break up not long before him and bob, his girlfriend found out he was gay, not long after he had found out himself, she left him and took pretty much everything he owned.

I think bob has liked mikey ever since they first met, he was always giving him looks and he always tells him how sexy he looks out on stage, oh by the way the band is really coming along, seeing is we just lost our former drummer because he was a homophobe, and we recruited new fresh talent, which was probably the best thing that has ever happened for the band. Everyone has come to terms with gee and i moving in together, his mother and Nan are so good to us.

His mother and father split after she found out what he was doing to gee and or making gee do, and his connections to the mafia, she turfed him quicker than a homophobe in a gay bar. (he he nice pun) but it was for the best, he got framed for murder he is in jail now, for life, and the way and iero family have never been better.

Yeah, about that, gee's mom and nan are living with my parents, their old house was under 'his' name and he sold it, so they moved in with my parents and now they're all best friends, our mother's get along like a house on fire, and gee's nan is a poker fanatic, so she gets along with my dad pretty well.

Now that I think about it, all of our lives have gotten better since gee's dad was caged, for once I agree with the law.

There is only one person I worry about, and that is ray, he has become so depressed and extremely suicidal ever since Denise left him, stupid good for nothing whore, she made him get our tattoo taken off. ('Our' tattoo is on ray's arse, it says 'life's a bitch', we all got him drunk and he passed out on the table so we got him a tattoo)she made him get it taken off because she didn't like it, she said he thought about us too much, what the fuck does she expect? We are like the only family he has left! Any ways, the stupid whore went and cheated on him with his stepbrother, which is what made him crack.

We all pacted not to ever let a bitch come between our brotherliness, its just too strong, to many lives rely on it.

I promised ray I would help him find his true soul mate, someone who cares for him like I care for gee, yeah, I promised I would find him a gee, well not a 'gee' but someone who he cares for like I care for gee and someone who cares for him like gee cares for me, I promised him, and I am not someone to go back on their word.

Tonight after work I'm going to sign him onto this really good matchmakers site, its really trusty, people can't lie to you on there, I'll bet I'll find his soul mate on there.

GERARD'S POV
As I woke up, I shot straight up when I saw the time, 03.10 "fucking asshole! He left without saying goodbye!" I got straight up out of bed, probably to quickly because I fell onto my ankle "fuck!" it was okay, I could walk, I stumbled out of our room into the open kitchen/dining room, I grabbed a stool from the counter, and dragged it over to the phone, I sat down and sleepily dialled franks cell number.

"Halo?" I heard from the other end of the line, "you shouldn't be talking while driving you asshole," there was a quick silence then I heard him giggle, "Morning babe" I smirked, I couldn't stay mad at this beautiful boy, "yeah good morning, why you didn't wake me up like you said you would?" "Im sorry, I just didn't have the heart to do it; you looked to peaceful and sexy," I was shocked a bit, "so I don't look sexy unless I'm asleep?" "No no no that's not wha..." I cut him off, "its okay sugar I was kidding, I really wanted to see you in uniform though, you know how much I love it." I heard him sigh playfully,
"Well just think, you'll see me in it tonight, and I'll be all dirty and sweaty, just the way you like it," I shuddered in delight, "when's your lunch break again?" it was quiet for a bit, I figured he was thinking, "uhh... 12.40 I think," "okay babe, see you then?" "Alrighty can't wait!" he practically yelled it. "Okay I love you to bits sugar," "love you more" there was a bit of static then he hung up.

I thought I had better get myself ready, so I put the stool back and raced into the bathroom. When I got in there I tripped up on one of franks pants, "fuck!" I yelled as I crashed to the floor, face first, "ow" I grunted and sat up, a note had fallen out of the pocket, I grabbed it and sat myself down on the toilet seat, I opened the note and read it aloud;

Dear Frank,
Hey frank, was sup? You and gee having fun in your new place?
Mikey and bob have been clingy lately.

Anyway, I had better say what i'm writing this letter to say, I did it again frank, I got myself pissed and I cut again. They're getting deeper and deeper and longer, I'm afraid that if I do it again, I'll... kill myself.

I really need help frank, you said you would help? You promised. I guess your just another person that doesn't give a fuck wether I live or die, don't worry your not alone, I know that Gerard doesn't really like me, and I know that mikey and bob just think of me as a roomie, don't worry, I'll be gone soon, I made myself vomit just before, I felt better for about three seconds then all the pain and the guilt came back, its killing me frank.

I'm such a loser! Not even my own family can stand me, they all went and got themselves blown up because of the humiliation and disappointment and... well... abandonment, I brought to them, but don't worry I'll be out of your hair soon, I'll be gone for good.

i hope you and gee have a great life, and tell mikey and bob I said thanks for letting me live with them, and remember, you left my heart an open wound, and I love you for it, you helped me realise im worthless and take actions to end this miserable nightmare, thank you frank.

Raymond Manuel Toro-Ortiz

The note slipped out of my hands, omg! I never thought ray felt that way, why does he think I don't like him, of course I do, he is like my second brother, the brother I never had and always wanted, heck I love him, he saved my life so many times, I have too get my arse over to his before he does something stupid.
I grabbed the note and ran into my room, pulling on my boots and a parka, my car keys and smokes were already in the pocket of my parka so that made it a hell of a lot easier getting out of the house, into my car, and down the street before it hit 03. 20.

As I pulled up to mikey, bob and ray's apartment, mikey's car was gone, and so was bob's so I figured they had left for work already. I locked my car and went around the back. As I scrambled over the fence, I saw ray inside, he was crying and writing a letter to someone, I called his name but he didn't hear, he set down the paper and pen on the dining table, and went for the bathroom. "Oh fuck!" I said as I tripped on Bata (ray's Spanish cat).

As I got inside I heard bath water running, what was he going to do? I reached the note and read it to myself:

8th April 2007

This is my suicide note, if your reading this it means I am already dead.

Mikey and Bob: thank you so much for being such Fab roomies, you two were not only just roomies, you were my best buddies, I hope you two live a very long and happy and blessed life together, I will forever be watching over you.

Mr. and Mrs. Way: what can I say? You guys took me in when I was twelve and looked after me, better than my real parents, thank you so god damn much, I hope you know that I don't want you to cry for me. This is my way out of my miserable and worthless life, I love you guys and I hope you live long and happily together for the rest of your lives.

Frank: what is there to say about you bro? you were and still are my best friend in the whole word, you kept me alive and half sane when Denise chucked me, you didn't turn your nose up in disgust when I told you I had a major crust on your mom, although that didn't go to well either did it? I hope you know how much those few times meant to me. I hope that they don't ruin what gee and you have, what you two have is magical, it's the realist shit ever man, I've never seen ,love like it, thanks for being there for me, and im sorry for doing this, but I've had enough, good bye frank, I love you so much.

Gerard: hey lil bro, you were my bro from the very start and you will be until the day hell freezes over twice, you are my whole heart my whole soul, the reason I still exist, dude you mean the world to me, you were my soul mate, but obviously I wasn't yours. I'm really really happy for you and frank, you treat him right, okay? I don't want you stuffing up on the best thing that has ever happened to you, as I said before, do not cry for me, this is my release, I'm letting go of the life I had and trying a new path, whether I go up or down I will always be watching over you, always.

Okay, its time to go now, do not cry, do not try to save me, I'm a lost soul, just leave me be. I love you all so much, goodbye and goodnight.