FicWad

At school the following Monday, Hannah was painfully aware of everyone around her. She had an overwhelming desire to just be alone. Maeve assumed it was just because she was confused about what she thought she felt for Jason's dad. That was part of it, but she really had no idea. Hannah hated lying to her. She had been like her sister since as far back as she could remember. It was just easier this way. No point in letting Maeve get worked up over it when in all honesty she didn't want to break things off with Gerard. He was right, she did love the idea of him. She loved everything about him.
Except, of course, his situation. A man with a wife and two kids was hardly who she had imagined falling for like this. Especially when one of those kids was her boyfriend.
Ugh, to think of it! It's just so wrong on so many levels. Then why does it seem so right?
Who was she kidding? This can't last. But she might as well enjoy it while it does.
"Hannah? Are you even listening?" Jason asked.
"Huh? Oh, sorry Jason. I was miles away. What were you saying?" she asked.
"There's a party at the Ashgrove on Saturday. Do you fancy it?" he asked.
"Sure, I guess. Who else is going?" she asked, not particularly caring. That's it, get him talking about something useless so you can drift off into your own world again.
It wasn't long before her friends arrived.
"Party at the Ashgrove! Who's going?" Fiona asked.
"We are," Jason said.
"Maybe you can find us those boyfriends you've been promising, Han," Lana said.
Just then, the bell to signal the end of lunch went.
"Spanish!" Lana exclaimed.
"Ugh, French," Maeve groaned.
"Come on Maeve, Jason. Leave the Spaniards to do their thing!" Fiona said.
The three of them left and Hannah and Lana slowly made their way to Spanish. They discovered that Miss Mason was out so they could talk for the duration of the class.
"So, what's up?" Lana asked.
"How'd you mean?" Hannah asked.
"Oh come on! I know you better than you think. What is it, trouble in bed?" Lana chuckled, trying to make light of a situation she considered very serious.
Hannah feigned a smile but it was none too convincing.
"Has he been at you for that again?" Lana asked, already knowing the answer.
"Occasionally. I'm still not sure about it," Hannah said.
"Well if you don't really really like him..." Lana said.
"Ido! It just doesn't feel right. Not yet," Hannah said.
"Do you think you're going to?" Lana asked.
"I don't know!" Hannah said, wondering why Lana was so interested.
"I don't think you should, if there's even a single doubt in your mind that you really want to. I want my first to be with someone I'm totally and completely crazy about, and you shouldn't settle for anything less," Lana said.
"Well it takes time to get to that stage of loving someone," Hannah said.
"'Spose. Just don't rush into it, yknow?" Lana said.
"I won't. Promise," Hannah said.
The bell went and everyone else filed out of the classroom.
"Shit, Heavey next. Can't be late again or she's suspending me," Hannah said, then rushed out of the room.
Fiona walked in and sat next to Lana.
"Did you tell her?" Fiona asked.
"Naw. I couldn't do it. She mightn't have believed me, and then what? But I'm pretty sure she's not gonna...y'know," Lana said.
"God I wish we didn't know this," Fiona said.
"We just think we know," Lana said hopefully.
"Oh come on, Lana!" Fiona said.
"I know, I know! I just hate believing it."