Categories > Celebrities > Fall Out Boy > Far From Lonely
I search the campus, roaming past the football fields and the mods instead. I sighed as the sun spotted my vision, holding my hand up to shield them. I don't know why I wasn't mad at him, I had a feeling that he just didn't want to say goodbye. I felt a pang of guilt, it was my fault he was fighting and acting out. I wrapped my hoodie tighter around myself even though it wasn't cold.
"This is it." I sighed kneeling on the ground. "My last week at school and I can't say goodbye to the person that needs it."
I sniffed and picked at the grass, not really caring about being noticed. I rocked back and forth on my knees, pulling up grass and thinking deeply.
"You know, you shouldn't always try to help people." Someone said behind me.
I jumped and turned to see Patrick with his head down and his hands in his pockets.
"Oh yeah?" I could only whisper back.
"I don't-..." He sighed and kicked the ground. "You don't have to always smile and act like everything all right."
I blinked back senseless tears; there was no reason to be crying. He had every right to pick apart my cover. I glanced up at his bruised face.
"You could even act spoiled every once in a while."
I got up and started walking away, I didn't need this. I just wanted him to say goodbye and act like he used to. He grabbed my hand and pulled my back.
"I'm gonna miss you." He sighed. "Don't forget."
I nodded, he let my hand fall. He smiled at me and ruffled my hair before turned and walking away. I bit back a giddy smile and walked back to school.
~~~
"So do you know where your adoptee lives?" One of the girls on the lacrosse team questioned.
Coach planned a going away party instead of practice for today, which was god because I could practice if I tried.
"I don't know." I mumbled sipping the cold drink in my hands. "Gabriel didn't tell me."
"That sucks." Julie sighed popping more chips into her mouth.
"Yeah." I said back, glancing up as Shane and Joe walked across the field and settling down beside me.
"I bet you guys'll miss Harper more than anyone." Another girl said leaning back on her elbows as Shane grabbed a handful of chips.
"I think someone's gonna miss her more than anyone else." Joe said, when he wasn't high he was a real gentleman.
He pointed to Patrick, walking with his head down and his hands in his pockets. I started to get up, but Joe grabbed my arm and pulled me back down.
"Give him time to grieve." His eyes were the saddest I'd ever seen form him; he looked like he was gonna miss me more than Patrick.
I silently nodded and watched as he disappeared inside the school; probably to detention. We finished the party and said our goodbyes. I couldn't help but cry as everyone hugged my tightly.
I pulled my hood up as Gabriel drove up, the overcast clouds hanging over. While I sat staring out the window with Shane gripping my hand in a sisterly way Gabriel bitched about the meaning of self control to Patrick.
The evening was different, I didn't feel like eating, instead I sat on the window seat in my room and stared at the passersby covered in plastic raincoats and umbrellas. My world seemed to be ripping apart at the seams, everything made no sense. I wasn't fair, but nothing in my life was ever fair.
I went to sleep hungry knowing tomorrow was Thursday; the second to last day before I went to the Aaronson's'. Nothing was ever gonna be the same, nothing at all.
"Harper, are you feeling all right?" Gabriel asked, peeking her head in my room and glancing around.
"I'm fine." I mumbled pulling the blanket off my legs and quickly getting dressed. "Considering this won't be my home on Friday."
"Harper, you have to realize if someone wants to adopt you there's nothing we can do about it." She said shutting the door behind her.
"Yeah, well thanks to your passiveness I won't get to see my friends ever again." I laughed bitterly. "I don't even know where 'my parents' live!"
She sighed and picked up a shirt that lay crumpled on the ground. I glared at her and continued to get ready.
"I guess life hasn't been really fair to you the past year and a half." She whispered and she folded the shirt and set it aside.
"No really?" I scoffed. "I hadn't noticed."
"Harper, you're being unfair." She winced as the words left my mouth.
"Unfair?" I laughed. "Tell me when the only life you ever wanted got ripped out from under you."
She sighed and stood, going to the door. Looking back one last time she wiped away a tear that hung in the corner of her eye.
"I'm sorry I did this to you." With that she shut the door.
I sat down on the bed; it wasn't her fault this was happening. She was just my supervisor; but she acted like so much more. She acted like my friend, my protector, my mother. I picked up the shirt she had folded on the bed and threw it back on the floor before pulling my knees to my chin.
A few tears slid down my face as I stood up and continued getting dressed. Walking down the steps I peeked my head in Andy's room where he was wrapped in a blanket on his bed. He waved me in and patted the bed.
"So these are your last couple of days." He said pulling a tissue out of the box by his bed and blowing his nose.
"Yeah." I sighed and glanced around his room, pictures of skinny men lined his walls. "How are you holding up?"
"I hate that I'm doing this to myself." He said shaking his head at the pictures on his walls. "I know it unhealthy and everyone is worried about me."
"Why won't you stop then?"
"I can't." He sniffed. "I tried, but it's so hard."
"Don't worry; I'll try to be here as much as possible." I hugged his tiny frame and breathed the thick scent of heavy perfume creating a haze around him.
"Don't kid yourself, Harper." He sighed sadly. "You and I both know you might be moving across the country."
"I know, but it's nice to dream." I sighed and scooted off the bed.
At school another party was set up in my American studies class, I always enjoyed that class the most anyway. Cake and going away presents littered my locker even before lunch.
"Wow, nice spread." Shane smirked as she leaned against the locker beside mine and peered in at the wrapping paper that littered the bottom.
"I know." I laughed and pulled a book from the mess. "But all just to say goodbye?"
"You did leave quite an impact on this school, no matter how much you want to believe you didn't." She smiled as the bell rang. "Well, gotta go; Shinskey's planning on torturing us if we're late."
I waved as she strutted off, turning heads in her usual oblivious way. I shook my head and headed off for gym, a plastic bag slung over my shoulder.
"Do you know where you're going yet?" Julie asked eagerly.
"Nope." I shook my head. "Honestly, I don't really want to know."
"Why not?" Another girl asked as we took a break from practice.
"I don't know what I'd do if I found out I was moving halfway across the country."
"Well they came to visit, right?"
"Yeah?"
"Well, that might mean they live close enough you can still go to school here!"
"Yeah, unless they ship me off to boarding school." I frowned as the whistle sounded and coach strolled up.
"You're not on the team to talk." She said firmly. "Get running."
We all groaned but picked up our cleated feet and jogged the length of the field until the whistle rang through the air. I stood bent and panting by my duffle bag when Joe walked up and patted my back. I smiled and looked behind him for Shane.
"Where's your shadow?" I questioned taking a big gulp of my water.
"Detention for falling asleep in Shiskey's."
"How did I know?" I rolled my eyes and hoisted up my bag. "Let's go, I need to get packed tonight."
His eyes glazed over slightly and he nodded sadly. We walked in silence up the hill and into the school to pick up the rest of the brood. This time David picked us up, saying something about Gabriel being busy then taking off.
Suddenly, home didn't feel like home anymore as I closed the lid of my last box and looked around my empty room. This was it; tomorrow this wasn't my room anymore. This wasn't my house anymore and the people downstairs weren't my family anymore.
I sniffed and wiped away tears with my cruddy sweatshirt sleeves. It had finally hit home in a bad way. The tears wouldn't go away, things felt unfinished and opened ended.
A flash of lightening struck outside and a roll of thunder soon followed. I sighed and closed the window, not wanting to induce water damage to the space around the room. The sound of feet pounding up the steps and my door banging open sent me spinning in a circle, grasping my chest in desperate need to take a deep breath.
Shane stood in front of me, her chest heaving and her eyes big. She panted a little and then reached out for my arms.
"Harper- its Patrick!" She coughed out.
"What? What's wrong with Patrick?!" I shook her gently.
"I- he's....he's not here." She pulled me toward the door. "He ran away."
Fear shot through me and before I could stop myself I had my hoodie on and was racing down the steps with Shane and Pete on my tail.
"This is it." I sighed kneeling on the ground. "My last week at school and I can't say goodbye to the person that needs it."
I sniffed and picked at the grass, not really caring about being noticed. I rocked back and forth on my knees, pulling up grass and thinking deeply.
"You know, you shouldn't always try to help people." Someone said behind me.
I jumped and turned to see Patrick with his head down and his hands in his pockets.
"Oh yeah?" I could only whisper back.
"I don't-..." He sighed and kicked the ground. "You don't have to always smile and act like everything all right."
I blinked back senseless tears; there was no reason to be crying. He had every right to pick apart my cover. I glanced up at his bruised face.
"You could even act spoiled every once in a while."
I got up and started walking away, I didn't need this. I just wanted him to say goodbye and act like he used to. He grabbed my hand and pulled my back.
"I'm gonna miss you." He sighed. "Don't forget."
I nodded, he let my hand fall. He smiled at me and ruffled my hair before turned and walking away. I bit back a giddy smile and walked back to school.
~~~
"So do you know where your adoptee lives?" One of the girls on the lacrosse team questioned.
Coach planned a going away party instead of practice for today, which was god because I could practice if I tried.
"I don't know." I mumbled sipping the cold drink in my hands. "Gabriel didn't tell me."
"That sucks." Julie sighed popping more chips into her mouth.
"Yeah." I said back, glancing up as Shane and Joe walked across the field and settling down beside me.
"I bet you guys'll miss Harper more than anyone." Another girl said leaning back on her elbows as Shane grabbed a handful of chips.
"I think someone's gonna miss her more than anyone else." Joe said, when he wasn't high he was a real gentleman.
He pointed to Patrick, walking with his head down and his hands in his pockets. I started to get up, but Joe grabbed my arm and pulled me back down.
"Give him time to grieve." His eyes were the saddest I'd ever seen form him; he looked like he was gonna miss me more than Patrick.
I silently nodded and watched as he disappeared inside the school; probably to detention. We finished the party and said our goodbyes. I couldn't help but cry as everyone hugged my tightly.
I pulled my hood up as Gabriel drove up, the overcast clouds hanging over. While I sat staring out the window with Shane gripping my hand in a sisterly way Gabriel bitched about the meaning of self control to Patrick.
The evening was different, I didn't feel like eating, instead I sat on the window seat in my room and stared at the passersby covered in plastic raincoats and umbrellas. My world seemed to be ripping apart at the seams, everything made no sense. I wasn't fair, but nothing in my life was ever fair.
I went to sleep hungry knowing tomorrow was Thursday; the second to last day before I went to the Aaronson's'. Nothing was ever gonna be the same, nothing at all.
"Harper, are you feeling all right?" Gabriel asked, peeking her head in my room and glancing around.
"I'm fine." I mumbled pulling the blanket off my legs and quickly getting dressed. "Considering this won't be my home on Friday."
"Harper, you have to realize if someone wants to adopt you there's nothing we can do about it." She said shutting the door behind her.
"Yeah, well thanks to your passiveness I won't get to see my friends ever again." I laughed bitterly. "I don't even know where 'my parents' live!"
She sighed and picked up a shirt that lay crumpled on the ground. I glared at her and continued to get ready.
"I guess life hasn't been really fair to you the past year and a half." She whispered and she folded the shirt and set it aside.
"No really?" I scoffed. "I hadn't noticed."
"Harper, you're being unfair." She winced as the words left my mouth.
"Unfair?" I laughed. "Tell me when the only life you ever wanted got ripped out from under you."
She sighed and stood, going to the door. Looking back one last time she wiped away a tear that hung in the corner of her eye.
"I'm sorry I did this to you." With that she shut the door.
I sat down on the bed; it wasn't her fault this was happening. She was just my supervisor; but she acted like so much more. She acted like my friend, my protector, my mother. I picked up the shirt she had folded on the bed and threw it back on the floor before pulling my knees to my chin.
A few tears slid down my face as I stood up and continued getting dressed. Walking down the steps I peeked my head in Andy's room where he was wrapped in a blanket on his bed. He waved me in and patted the bed.
"So these are your last couple of days." He said pulling a tissue out of the box by his bed and blowing his nose.
"Yeah." I sighed and glanced around his room, pictures of skinny men lined his walls. "How are you holding up?"
"I hate that I'm doing this to myself." He said shaking his head at the pictures on his walls. "I know it unhealthy and everyone is worried about me."
"Why won't you stop then?"
"I can't." He sniffed. "I tried, but it's so hard."
"Don't worry; I'll try to be here as much as possible." I hugged his tiny frame and breathed the thick scent of heavy perfume creating a haze around him.
"Don't kid yourself, Harper." He sighed sadly. "You and I both know you might be moving across the country."
"I know, but it's nice to dream." I sighed and scooted off the bed.
At school another party was set up in my American studies class, I always enjoyed that class the most anyway. Cake and going away presents littered my locker even before lunch.
"Wow, nice spread." Shane smirked as she leaned against the locker beside mine and peered in at the wrapping paper that littered the bottom.
"I know." I laughed and pulled a book from the mess. "But all just to say goodbye?"
"You did leave quite an impact on this school, no matter how much you want to believe you didn't." She smiled as the bell rang. "Well, gotta go; Shinskey's planning on torturing us if we're late."
I waved as she strutted off, turning heads in her usual oblivious way. I shook my head and headed off for gym, a plastic bag slung over my shoulder.
"Do you know where you're going yet?" Julie asked eagerly.
"Nope." I shook my head. "Honestly, I don't really want to know."
"Why not?" Another girl asked as we took a break from practice.
"I don't know what I'd do if I found out I was moving halfway across the country."
"Well they came to visit, right?"
"Yeah?"
"Well, that might mean they live close enough you can still go to school here!"
"Yeah, unless they ship me off to boarding school." I frowned as the whistle sounded and coach strolled up.
"You're not on the team to talk." She said firmly. "Get running."
We all groaned but picked up our cleated feet and jogged the length of the field until the whistle rang through the air. I stood bent and panting by my duffle bag when Joe walked up and patted my back. I smiled and looked behind him for Shane.
"Where's your shadow?" I questioned taking a big gulp of my water.
"Detention for falling asleep in Shiskey's."
"How did I know?" I rolled my eyes and hoisted up my bag. "Let's go, I need to get packed tonight."
His eyes glazed over slightly and he nodded sadly. We walked in silence up the hill and into the school to pick up the rest of the brood. This time David picked us up, saying something about Gabriel being busy then taking off.
Suddenly, home didn't feel like home anymore as I closed the lid of my last box and looked around my empty room. This was it; tomorrow this wasn't my room anymore. This wasn't my house anymore and the people downstairs weren't my family anymore.
I sniffed and wiped away tears with my cruddy sweatshirt sleeves. It had finally hit home in a bad way. The tears wouldn't go away, things felt unfinished and opened ended.
A flash of lightening struck outside and a roll of thunder soon followed. I sighed and closed the window, not wanting to induce water damage to the space around the room. The sound of feet pounding up the steps and my door banging open sent me spinning in a circle, grasping my chest in desperate need to take a deep breath.
Shane stood in front of me, her chest heaving and her eyes big. She panted a little and then reached out for my arms.
"Harper- its Patrick!" She coughed out.
"What? What's wrong with Patrick?!" I shook her gently.
"I- he's....he's not here." She pulled me toward the door. "He ran away."
Fear shot through me and before I could stop myself I had my hoodie on and was racing down the steps with Shane and Pete on my tail.
Sign up to rate and review this story