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DISCLAIMER - PLEASE REFER TO CHAPTER 1 FOR ALL DISCLAIMERS.


By Medic (MedicLifeline)

PG13

Please let me know what you think., reviews welcome.

Thanks to Storm O and Scarlett Phoenix, your help is much appricated.


CHAPTER 4 : DECISIONS


I finally finished the schedule. After much fussing and, well, silent cursing, I am ready to post it. I stayed up most of the night trying to get it done. Thank heavens it's one less thing for me to worry about nowadays.

I have too much on my mind to keep me preoccupied. Like I wrote in this journal before, I have to run the infirmary. This means no days off until we get another doctor to run the asylum. Hawk informed me that they would start the search right away. In a way, what a relief. I just hope they are as good as Carl to tell you the truth. He can never be replaced for sure. I have seen a few military doctors; some I wish I hadn't.

I arrived at my office early like usual and before I could even sit down, there was a knock on the door. It was General Hawk and Duke needing to speak with me. I was to go with them to Hawk's office. This had to be important since both showed up together. I was praying none of my medical team had went and done anything to cause two highest-ranking GI Joe officials to pay a visit to me. Little did I know what the conversation that followed would be like. Here is some of what I recall...

General Hawk took a seat behind his desk. Hawk's desk was covered with papers as usual, and Duke sat off in a chair to the other side of the desk. Both greeted me warmly but then it was down to business. I took my seat, and soon Duke and Hawk were asking how the infirmary was running, how the patients were, and what was going on since the loss of Carl.

I told them it could go a little better, but that it could also be a little worse. I did tell them that I needed a few more hands to help me out, and I was grateful they could get Angel and WiseGuy. General Hawk and Duke agreed and hoped both new medics worked out.

But then they began to talk about how the team needed a new doctor. I knew what was coming next before they said another word. Carl had been pushing me to go to medical school for the past few years. I told Carl, "No, I was happy where I was in my life."

As they spoke my mind went to the conversation with Carl a few months back......

"But Lifeline...Ed, listen, I really think this would be good for you and the team," Carl told me.

"I understand Carl, but that would take years, and our team does not have that kind of time. Plus, I really do not want to be away from the Joes that long. Besides, I do not mind going out into the field. If I was to get my MD, I would have to stay back. Look at how you are locked into budget meetings all the time...plus paperwork and the patients that show up in the infirmary. I feel for you Carl, that is not for me. I am not a leader; we all know that. You are...."

"Lifeline, you can be a good leader if you just gave yourself credit and initiative," Carl had told me shaking his head. "What if something happens to me, Lifeline? Than what?"

I had stood there, not wanting to even think of that. Another friend lost. How little we knew that question would come true soon enough, " We will deal with that then Doc," I had quickly replied," Besides, the budget won't let us have two doctors on staff. Just one, and I do not see the budget getting larger anytime soon, it just gets smaller all the time."

"Either way Ed, I have confidence in you, even if you do not have it in yourself. You can be a leader when needed, I have seen it on the battlefield," Carl smiled.

"Maybe, maybe not. Carl, I just don't know," I quietly told him shrugging." Look what happened last time I was in charge."

"Yes, I do recall that, but then so was Shipwreck and Dial Tone," ** Carl chuckled," But remember what General Hawk said about your leadership skills?"

I did as his words rang in my ears from that day. Snapping out of my recollections by Hawk's voice, my mind went back to our conversation at hand.

"Lifeline, we need to talk to you," General Hawk told me," I know this is not a good time to be discussing this as emotions are still raw. But you understand correct?"

I sat there, knowing what was to come next, for it had been asked before by them and Carl," Yes sir."

"Lifeline, we want to give you the opportunity to become the team's doctor. You have been here the longest, and we know the quality of work you do. The team trusts you, and your patient care is impeccable."

"We want you, Ed, to consider the offer we are about to make to you," Duke informed me, giving me a look of at least hear us out.

My heart started to pound as it beat against my chest. Suddenly, I felt myself starting to sweat; my hands were clammy, and I nervously wiped them on my pant legs. Their eyes studied me. I had less stress to deal with in a combat zone than what I thought I was dealing with at this moment in my life. They wanted me to be the team's doctor, which would mean medical school and taking Carl's place....

"Ed, we want you to understand. We are not asking you to take Carl's place, just his position. I know he would have wanted it this way. We have both spoken to him about this in the past," General Hawk said.

"You see, Lifeline, Carl brought it to our attention a while back in a meeting," Duke began," that he felt you had the skills and qualities of being a good, if not great, doctor. Carl also knew that you could not stay with the team, and he was at the time trying to figure a way we could keep both of you. I know you had voiced concern about this to Doc at one time for budget reasons also. We had also been informed of his speaking about this to you, and you always turning it down. We have a need now, and we wanted to see if you had changed your mind."

I was surprised to say the least that Carl had said anything.

General Hawk cleared his throat," Lifeline, I know it is a big decision, but just be honest with Duke and me."

Looking to the both of them, I took a deep breath. How could I say what I was going to say without saying the wrong thing? The opportunity I was being given was one of the most important decisions I could make in my life. Carl had talked to me about it a few times, but I never knew he had gone to either Duke or General Hawk.

"First off, Sir, I want to thank you for this opportunity. But, I must respectfully decline. I just can't," I told both of them. "Besides, the team would be lacking a doctor for a few years. We need one before then. I can't leave my team to just anyone. I may not be the most liked by some of them, but for the most part they trust me. That leaves only Sideswipe as the medic until the new ones that just arrived get settled in and comfortable. I know both you, General Hawk, and Duke will find the best doctor out there for the team. I just want to be the best medic out there for our team." I took a breath. "Besides I just can't... I can't take Carl's place."

To say the least, I think they both understood, but at the same time were disappointed in me for turning down the offer. But they knew that the team needed a real doctor now, not one years from now. Both of them agreed and said I was to be included in the process to help find a doctor, unless I was away on a mission. The interviews and file reading would be ready in a few days, after several were gathered. They both bid me a good day, and I was back to filing paperwork in my office until my two new medics arrived to get their schedules.

WiseGuy and Angel showed up as I had asked them to yesterday. I had scheduled them both off a few days in order to get stowed away and to get to know the other Joes on the team.

While Angel was in my office, she told me of some of her experiences before joining the Joes. Soon after we had started talking, there was another knock at my door; it was WiseGuy. We all soon sat there discussing the infirmary. I explained that as of right now we rotated missions. Generally, I would go out on the first mission deployed. Sometimes, if there was more than one mission out, Sideswipe would take the other mission. Always there was someone here at the infirmary...always! Doc and I would alternate the first missions. If Doc was out, then I stayed in, allowing Sideswipe to go out with a second deployed team if the need arose. Since between PT, missions, and just some plain horsing around, people ended up in here, just like on any other base.

All three of us started to swap stories of some of the stranger things we had encountered as medics. Each story left us laughing harder than the last. We chose this day not to dwell on the ones that broke our hearts and left us wishing we could do more. We all three had quite frankly had several of those already. We chose to focus on the funny and odd times.

After I showed and handed them a copy of the schedule, Pete (WiseGuy) stayed behind and visited with me for a while. Angel left WiseGuy and I to go do some looking around. Pete had asked when my next day off was, and I had to inform him that I did not have even the foggiest idea. We had no doctor at the time and were in the process of getting one. Until then, I was the lucky one in charge.

As I sat in my office, Pete (WiseGuy) took a seat. We started to catch up some more.
WiseGuy had asked how Steph was doing and my father. I told him both were doing well. Steph was to be married a little over two years now, and Dad was still preaching. Steph was due with her first child, and I was anxious to see them since she had a few problems in her pregnancy but nothing too terrible. More morning sickness then anything. I had requested leave to go home closer to her due date, but there was no way of knowing now since I had other responsibilities here. They both kept me up to date on her condition and how she is doing. He had laughed at me being an uncle. I had told him, I was not a young spring chicken. I asked if his two sisters ever married, WiseGuy said of course they did, and they are keeping their husbands in line he kidded. (I knew his sisters. That is nothing to kid about. They will keep those men in line......One tried to date me once. Thank heavens I had been dating Abby at the time.)

We sat there a bit longer trying to catch up until a patient was brought in.
I excused myself and went to go see what it was. WiseGuy left to go look around.
It seems like Footloose was running the PT course and sprained his ankle. But just to be sure, I had to get X rays. After an evaluation and X rays and a few more things, I wrapped his ankle and issued him some crutches, sending him on his way

The day did not go too bad aside from my talk with Hawk and Duke. Thank heavens as I am getting concerned, since we have no Doc on board. What if something happens and we need one? I try not to think about that, but it is there sticking me like a pin in the back of my mind...




* Carl was refering to the time Lifeline, Shipwreck and Dial Tone were all placed in charge of the GI Joe team by a promotion, thanks to Serpentor and Cobra. This led to utter chaos, for the whole team. The episode was called The Most Dangerous Thing In The World. Hawk explained at the end about each of their leadership skills, he states that Lifeline has the ability to be an officer but not the desire.. Lifeline agrees that he would rather help people than be responsible, for more information on this subject the show is on Season II Part I out on DVD and www.QKTheatre.com**